I vow to be nice to Synbios from now on. In this thread, my peace offering. . .

[TVC15]

I apologize for all insensitivity in the past, Synbios.  You have to understand that I honestly believed you were a joke character, hence my gross, gross insensitivity.  Of course, you have shown as fact that you are indeed the real deal, but due to my occasionally hard-headed tendencies, I couldn't back down, and I continued to make extremely mean jokes.

Today, this evening, I admit that I was wrong, and I was a total and complete jerk that deserves to suck on an exhaust pipe for a few hours.

I understand that there is little within my power that can be done to set right this transgression, and I think the closest thing I can do is point to a place where the healing can begin.  As we all know, humor heals, so I have decided that we should all get over this ugly chapter of Evilbore with a nice, good laugh.  So this, Synbios, is a classic little laugh for you, and for the rest of Evilbore to share, because my bad public behavior should be punished with equally public penance:

http://tinyurl.com/343dld

[Ichirou]

I just need to know one thing before I click.  Is this sfw?

[TVC15]

It includes a bit of vulgarity.  Nothing too salty. All text.

[hyp]

synbois is a good sport, i give him props for the beating he's taken on this board.   

[Oblivion]

What brought this about, TVC?

[bagofeyes]

hey, if you reveal something on the net, its fair game.

[Ichirou]

Smooth Groove PM'ed me saying he feels sorry for Synbios too.  I dunno wtf is going on.

[Van Cruncheon]

needs more jokes about retardeds

[Phoenix Dark]

smh tvc
http://www.wittycomics.com/comic/31843

[Ichirou]

Synbios should be renamed "Gleepglop."

[Phoenix Dark]

i need a better character for synbios. 

[FlameOfCallandor]

Sybios, How do you read? Can you see the book when your feet are holding it?

[Smooth Groove]

What brought this about, TVC?

Two days ago, I started calling for an end to the cruelty towards flippers.  I'm glad to see that even an asshole and sexual deviant like TVC can finally see the light.  If he can change, so can the rest of you. 

[Madrun Badrun]

I'm just as socially inept as Synbios and I get no Pity around here.  NONE!  I'ma going to bend my arms back at the elbow on a vice, then we'll see who you really feel bad for!

[Synbios459]

if you all really mean what you say then thanks, i promise no more stalking or harassing or micropenis guys

[drohne]

you know that blue text at the end of whitey's post

i was like 'http tinyurl what the fuck does that mean'

but it turns out that it's a 'link'

it takes you somewhere when you click on it

[Ichirou]

Let's see just how long this ceasefire lasts.

drohne: Whatever it is, it's blocked at work due to being a "humor" link.  I was taking TVC's post at face value, but you seem to be indicating he may have been facetious (take notes on the spelling for that, gleepglop).

[Ichirou]

What brought this about, TVC?

Two days ago, I started calling for an end to the cruelty towards flippers.  I'm glad to see that even an asshole and sexual deviant like TVC can finally see the light.  If he can change, so can the rest of you. 

You never answered my PM as to whether you thought gleepglop might be mentally disabled, dude.

[Oblivion]

you know that blue text at the end of whitey's post

i was like 'http tinyurl what the fuck does that mean'

but it turns out that it's a 'link'

it takes you somewhere when you click on it

I had a feeling he might not have been sincere but...I didn't wanna click the link.

[Synbios459]

I Hope My Baby Doesn't Come Out All Fucked-Up And Shit 

I sure hope my baby don't come out all fucked-up and shit. 'Cause I know I'm gonna be a good mother, and I'm totally ready, no matter what anybody say, but I don't think I could deal with that. I mean, like, if something was wrong with it, that would suck so fuckin' bad.

I'm a little worried because of some stuff Erin told me. She was saying how, like, if you party a lot, it can make the baby's face all fucked-up. Like, if you drink too much, it could have these weird eyes that look kinda Chinese. That's what she said.

It ain't like I was surprised. I know how you gotta watch what you do when you're having a baby. Like, you gotta make sure to eat, and you gotta not be running around and smoking three packs a day. I ain't stupid. Now that I'm expecting on having a baby, I've cut down to just one pack, and I ain't drinking except for weekends and paydays.

So, like, I'm being all healthy and shit now. But the problem is, I didn't even know I was pregnant until this month. Back when I must of got pregnant, I wasn't keeping track of things too good. It must have happened around when I got fired from Burger King—all because that bitch manager Denise searched my locker—and I was training at the Stop-N-Go. But then I missed nine days of work in a row, so I was like, fuck it, and I quit. I wasn't seeing Gary or D'Shawn anymore because I was getting all serious with Troy from The Gift Box factory. (I was a seasonal there before I started at the Golden Corral two weeks ago, which is around when I moved back into my mom's apartment, 'cause her old boyfriend Don took a trucking job, and she didn't like living all alone over in that neighborhood because it ain't too safe.) So, anyway, like I said, I wasn't keeping track of things too good.

It's kind of funny that I'm pregnant, 'cause when I was working on the assembly line at The Gift Box, I kept having to put these little ceramic-statue things in with the cheese and sausage and the other shit that went out in the orders we packed up. The statues were of little baby angels and kids in pajamas who were praying and doing other cute shit. As I was packing up the little statues, I remember thinking how nice it would be to have a baby to keep me company.

Well, shit, as it turned out, the whole time I was packing those kid statues into the boxes, thinking about how I'd love to have a little girl like the one on the "I'm Yours" statue that's holding out the flowers, I was already pregnant. Isn't that fucking crazy?

Now, don't think I was trying to get knocked up or nothing. 'Cause I wasn't. But my best friend Tina had her first one when she was 15, and here I am 18 already, so it's not bad that I didn't get pregnant by accident until now. My mom always told me I should wait until I was living with someone, but I ain't going for that corny-ass, old-fashioned shit.

But here's why I'm buggin' a little on the whole thing: Like I said, that's when I was with Troy, and him and me, we were doing a lot of drinking around then, 'cause that's when we was first getting to know each other. We did a lot of other shit, too, which I won't go into detail about because even though I'm not with Troy anymore, we're still friends, and I ain't about to get him in trouble his P.O.

That's why I've been thinking about how I hope the baby's all right. I ain't worried that it's dead, because if it wasn't still alive, I know it would come out, because that's what happened to Tina once. I'm not even talking about that. I'm talking about, like, its brain and everything. A lot of people don't know this, but a baby has a brain even before it's born, and it's the same brain it has when it grows up, so if something happens, the kid can come out like a distinguished mentally-challenged fellow.

You might think that ain't a big deal, but it is, 'cause I want my baby to have a better life. My child is gonna get a education. She's gonna get a good job and make lots of money, and we're gonna go on vacations to the Bahamas together. She'll have so much cash, I'll be able to retire early and never have to work another shitty-ass job.

That's why I hope she comes out okay. I want her to have a good life and everything, and that's hard if you're funny-looking and talk weird and drool all the time, 'cause then no one wants to talk to you. And then you'll get depression and not even care about hanging out or partying or nothing.

So I been really thinking lately, because even though I ain't seen no doctor yet, I know for sure I'm pregnant. It sure ain't fat on my stomach, 'cause I've been on a diet since July. But I still gotta go in to the hospital and have them tell me if it's a boy or a girl. I'll do that just as soon as I tell my mom, even though I'm pretty sure she knows and just ain't been saying nothing. And when I see a doctor, I'll ask him about if he thinks the baby will come out okay.

Until then, I guess there ain't nothing else I can do.

[Ichirou]

It would be awesome if Synbios turned out to be part black or something, since he hates minorities and is adopted.

[Synbios459]

I tried a peace offering with Ichirou and all he said was

Fuck off, mutant.

[Ichirou]

Thanks for making another private message public, freakshow.

[DJ_Tet]

So is it Troy's baby or what?

[GilloD]

I like the guy, but he constantly pushes until you snap. It's like a contest, only the first prize is anger.

[Tauntaun]

I like the guy, but he constantly pushes until you snap. It's like a contest, only the first prize is anger.

I don't want to play.