Monsters and Madmen: A Miles Trahan Joint, presented by BK Beast Films

[TVC15]

Considering the draft is dated December, 2007, I'm guessing after.  The fact that the movie opens with a pretentious Freud quote is ...did he really get the title from the Criterion box set?  That's just sad, if so.

You know, I doubted the title thing at first, too. . .until I noticed that the Criterion set released in January.  We know that Miles follows DVD releases.  There's no way that he titled this screenplay without at least subliminal knowledge.

[Ichirou]

Monsters and Madmen is a really, really dumb name for a hitman movie that doesn't actually have any monsters or madmen in it.

[Phoenix Dark]

I would have suggested..

Blood Gold
Brains on a Wall
Fiat Hitmen Part I

[Madrun Badrun]

I get the forbidden error when I hit the link so Whiteman can you upload the script onto your own server so I can read it?   

Also I think its impressive that some one his age wrote out an entire screenplay, no matter the quality.

[Ichirou]

I can see where young Miles was trying to go with the title - Jack Trenton's quest for vengeance turns him into a MONSTER.  But c'mon, audiences are too dumb to take a title like that any way other than literally.

Brains on a Wall is at least accurate as to the screenplay's content.

Arvie, when I was in high school, I wrote a fucking novel, but I didn't post it anywhere or show it to anybody because I was smart enough to know that anything I wrote with the life experience of a teenager was bound to be pretty bad.  This is just 95 pages, and not so much text when you take the formatting into account.  Anybody could do it.

[lordmaji]

Damn... Sounds better then The Bourne series.

[Flannel Boy]

Damn... Sounds better then The Bourne series.

Maybe he should rename the movie The StillBourne: Miscarriage

[The Fake Shemp]

I applaud the young Miles Trahan for making his screenplay public and welcoming the criticism that follows publishing any written work.  My thoughts are similar to Prole's - yeah, it's garbage, but at least it's coherent and has structure, no matter how cliche it is.  I personally wouldn't make any screenplay I wrote public; there's too much to lose.  A few folks have my favorite screenplay, but even I know I'm (at best) a mediocre writer that feels safe within genre films.  I write what I want to see and I think overreaching is the worst thing any writer can do.  I'm being offered a pay gig to write a script based off a treatment and I'm probably going to turn it down because I don't think I'm good enough to really make a decent screenplay out of the idea.  Although, a much more talented writer could.

[TVC15]

My screenplays are basically just 3 hours of people looking at the ceiling, moon-eyed, saying things like

[lordmaji]

I applaud the young Miles Trahan for making his screenplay public and welcoming the criticism that follows publishing any written work.  My thoughts are similar to Prole's - yeah, it's garbage, but at least it's coherent and has structure, no matter how cliche it is.  I personally wouldn't make any screenplay I wrote public; there's too much to lose.  A few folks have my favorite screenplay, but even I know I'm (at best) a mediocre writer that feels safe within genre films.  I write what I want to see and I think overreaching is the worst thing any writer can do.  I'm being offered a pay gig to write a script based off a treatment and I'm probably going to turn it down because I don't think I'm good enough to really make a decent screenplay out of the idea.  Although, a much more talented writer could.

We all like to dream.

[Ichirou]

lordmaji, did you read the screenplay?

[lordmaji]

lordmaji, did you read the screenplay?

Nah, too lazy.

[Yeti]

Whatever happened to the dark shake?

[TVC15]

Whatever happened to the dark shake?

I heard he got trapped in a car and ate himself to death.

[Phoenix Dark]

He's at Mupepe.com with the rest of the gang

We'll be in control of EB in 4 years. TVC/Drinky/MAF will be too OLD for the internet

[Eric P]

Who's more likely to make it in Hollywood - Shake, Willco, or FoC?

I predict my new wave of german expressionistic-inspired pornography will be bigger than ANYTHING they do.

the cabinet of dr caligari vs the box of mistress arlaune?

let's see if tertellian was correct.  are female genitalia the doorway to hell?

only the sodomite somnambulist cesare can tell us for certain!

[TVC15]

He's at Mupepe.com with the rest of the gang

We'll be in control of EB in 4 years. TVC/Drinky/MAF will be too OLD for the internet

You say that like it's a bad thing.  I'll be glad when I'm gone from these forums.  Fuck EB, you can have it.  I find it hilarious that you find it some mark of superiority that you're aligned with Shake, though. 

[Eel O'Brian]

I'd make this film in Claymation, like the california raisins

[Yeti]

I thought mupepe deleted mupepe.com

also, LOL at your Pizza the Hutt reference.

[CajoleJuice]

He's at Mupepe.com with the rest of the gang

We'll be in control of EB in 4 years. TVC/Drinky/MAF will be too OLD for the internet

You say that like it's a bad thing.  I'll be glad when I'm gone from these forums.  Fuck EB, you can have it.

Same here. Goes for any forum, really.

[Flannel Boy]

He's at Mupepe.com with the rest of the gang

We'll be in control of EB in 4 years. TVC/Drinky/MAF will be too OLD for the internet

You say that like it's a bad thing.  I'll be glad when I'm gone from these forums.  Fuck EB, you can have it.

Same here. Goes for any forum, really.

spoiler (click to show/hide)

:'(

[close]

[lordmaji]

I thought mupepe deleted mupepe.com

also, LOL at your Pizza the Hutt reference.

Nope. It crash horribly almost a year ago and it sat there until Muppy gave me the reigns to rebuild. So it's up and running. Has been for a few months. probably since August.. I think. Muppy is still there though. He pays the bills.

[Tauntaun]

My screenplays are basically just 3 hours of people looking at the ceiling, moon-eyed, saying things like

(Image removed from quote.)

   Would watch, total.

Edit: Oh and the part about the stalker being all in his head or part of himself is a pretty neat idea that could be expounded upon in a more serious/creepy/gritty film.

[Joe Molotov]

Edit: Oh and the part about the stalker being all in his head or part of himself is a pretty neat idea that could be expounded upon in a more serious/creepy/gritty film.

They did that in the movie Thr3e. It was one of the worst movies I've ever seen.

[Tauntaun]

Edit: Oh and the part about the stalker being all in his head or part of himself is a pretty neat idea that could be expounded upon in a more serious/creepy/gritty film.

They did that in the movie Thr3e. It was one of the worst movies I've ever seen.

Oh, well was it just bad film making or is the concept you think, stupid?

[FlameOfCallandor]

Im never going to post my scripts online. 

[Eric P]

Im never going to post my scripts online. 

i think we would like the touching scene of you, ron paul and a bar of gold in "goldfingered."

[FlameOfCallandor]

Im never going to post my scripts online. 

i think we would like the touching scene of you, ron paul and a bar of gold in "goldfingered."

 

I talked to an Alaskan politician living in Austin who is finding a story that is based on the Ron Paul candidacy. 

[Eric P]

I talked to an Alaskan politician living in Austin who is finding a story that is based on the Ron Paul candidacy. 

that poor man

i can't imagine how much those summers must absolutely suck for him

[Joe Molotov]

Edit: Oh and the part about the stalker being all in his head or part of himself is a pretty neat idea that could be expounded upon in a more serious/creepy/gritty film.

They did that in the movie Thr3e. It was one of the worst movies I've ever seen.

Oh, well was it just bad film making or is the concept you think, stupid?

It was pretty awful even before that twist, but now if I saw it in another movie I'd probably be thinking "They already did that in that other crappy movie!"

[Van Cruncheon]

TDS

What's your beef with him Ichi?  I don't care to spend a minute reading any of it, but why is it necessary to track down something someone did around here and shit all over it? 

ichi and tds have a long history on the mupepe.com forums where you post regularly. in fact, given that forum's microscopic span of existence and userbase, it's fair to say that the ichi/tds relationship IS that forum's history. go through the archive, and you'll find the details of their brooding, misanthropic romance.

that said, tds is a total fucking knob, as his posting history will prove -- he expected to be treated like some sort of expert in the realm of cinema, when he turned out to be another pop cinema fanboy without any literary credentials to speak of. now, normally, that's fine, but it also behooves you to recognize when people know a great deal more than you and to back off, instead of immediately escalating and shitting up every adjacent thread to boot, which is shake's modus operandi. fuck, i'm no bastion of cinematic knowledge, but you don't see me getting in these pissing matches because i know when i'm out of my depth. shake, on the other hand, is apparently into watersports.

i'm sure this response will engender the predictable "wah wah eb elitists" circlejerk over at moop's forum, but if there's any place in this world where we shouldn't have to mollycoddle the egos of idiots, it's the internet. getting e-respect isn't a matter of knowledge, or a matter of experience; it's a matter of personal policy.

[The Fake Shemp]

lol elitists why dont u buy moar stuff u elitist

[lordmaji]

TDS

What's your beef with him Ichi?  I don't care to spend a minute reading any of it, but why is it necessary to track down something someone did around here and shit all over it? 

ichi and tds have a long history on the mupepe.com forums where you post regularly. in fact, given that forum's microscopic span of existence and userbase, it's fair to say that the ichi/tds relationship IS that forum's history. go through the archive, and you'll find the details of their brooding, misanthropic romance.

that said, tds is a total fucking knob, as his posting history will prove -- he expected to be treated like some sort of expert in the realm of cinema, when he turned out to be another pop cinema fanboy without any literary credentials to speak of. now, normally, that's fine, but it also behooves you to recognize when people know a great deal more than you and to back off, instead of immediately escalating and shitting up every adjacent thread to boot, which is shake's modus operandi. fuck, i'm no bastion of cinematic knowledge, but you don't see me getting in these pissing matches because i know when i'm out of my depth. shake, on the other hand, is apparently into watersports.

i'm sure this response will engender the predictable "wah wah eb elitists" circlejerk over at moop's forum, but if there's any place in this world where we shouldn't have to mollycoddle the egos of idiots, it's the internet. getting e-respect isn't a matter of knowledge, or a matter of experience; it's a matter of personal policy.

I never paid attention to the old drama on that board before the original version went down.  I also know that TDS is a bit of a lighting rod when it comes to drawing attention to himself and he always seems to get himself into shit.  But I don't understand the reasoning behind tracking down something that someone put work into to needlessly bash it on here. 

Just as I think it's pointless and immature for cheebs/synbios to troll ichi and spam other people, I too think it's dumb to just bring up a random thread with the sole intent of embarrassing another person.  Let bygones be bygones and all that. 

And there are a lot of elitists around here.  Nobody has to run to another board to say that and one would be stupid to deny that.  I'm not sure what that has to do with my question, but maybe I'll wah wah my way over to mups place and ask.  I should get a reply within 7-15 days, depending on that forum's traffic.

fucking elitists.

FA is an elitist. It's all good I do enjoy posting here at GAF Jr. You guys crack me up

Prole is good in my book. Fuck, I sure could use a double shot of percocet.

[TVC15]

Edit: Oh and the part about the stalker being all in his head or part of himself is a pretty neat idea that could be expounded upon in a more serious/creepy/gritty film.

They did that in the movie Thr3e. It was one of the worst movies I've ever seen.

Oh, well was it just bad film making or is the concept you think, stupid?

It's like the most hackneyed concept ever.  It's like the shitty twist in the extremely shitty script that Charlie Kaufman's brother is writing in adaptation.  A good rule of thumb is that if what you're writing involves someone with multiple personalities, it's probably really shitty.

Im never going to post my scripts online. 

I only show my shit to a few people I trust.  I have a fairly decent critical barometer, and I know when I'm working on something terrible.  Until I want shit published for wider release, I want complete control over the people I show things to; I know which people in my social circle can give good constructive feedback.  That means I don't have to waste time parsing whether Tard Schmo on the internet is actually saying something worthwhile or not.

[Van Cruncheon]

And there are a lot of elitists around here.  Nobody has to run to another board to say that and one would be stupid to deny that.  I'm not sure what that has to do with my question, but maybe I'll wah wah my way over to mups place and ask.  I should get a reply within 7-15 days, depending on that forum's traffic.

what separates an elitist from an expert? an elitist doesn't feel the urge to pander to the vagaries of random egos. like i said, if there's one place in this world where we can drop the hammer on the usual wanna-be smarty-man dipshittery that pervades the sum of our existence, it's the internet. on the other hand, when half you fine folks call someone an "elitist," you mean "person who contradicted me and my presumed expertise in an unfriendly way." if you think before you post -- seriously! run through potential counter-arguments in your head, and likewise ask yourself if you're putting an agenda or a trolling strategy before common fucking sense -- you'll find that you are suddenly in the company of very few elitists. how's that work? amazing!

(note that i do not excuse my own lovable self from accusations of "wannabe smarty-man dipshittery" as it were. on the other hand, i can fucking back my points up, and have the intellectual acumen to stand up to average scrutiny. when i do indeed get called to the carpet -- and i do! seen my record at gaf recently? -- the last thing i do is whine and whine and whine and whine and whine and whine and then post at another forum about how mean them damn elitists what showed me up are and whine some more. we call this butthurtedness in the patois of the internet elitist. it's not an attractive condition.)

normally, i'd kinda smh at ichi harassing tds across forums, but a) this topic has sparked some good conversation in this thread; b) tds 911 calls to the wahmbulance still reverberate in these parts; and c) COME ON, THE SCRIPT BRINGS THE LULZ. that's the other purpose of the internet besides berating the cluelessly stupid: THE LULZ!

[bluemax]

So what are the chances that upon going into film school, the vast majority of the students are Shake-like idiots that just want to make carbon copies of the garbage of recent years?

None of the film students I met in college (at the #1 film school in the world blah blah blah) seemed to have any interest in making action movies.

[TVC15]

MONSTERS AND MADMEN 2:

Donald Kaufman: The killer, the girl, and the cop all have split-personalities. They're all the same person. Isn't that fucked up?

[lordmaji]

damn pwn'd!!!

But damn, I learned that President Nixon had been eaten by white cannibals on an island near Tijuana, for no good reason at all... ... ...

[TVC15]

MONSTERS AND MADMEN 2:

Donald Kaufman: The killer, the girl, and the cop all have split-personalities. They're all the same person. Isn't that fucked up?

Here you go. The killer's a literature professor. He cuts off little chunks from his victims' bodies until they die. He calls himself "the deconstructionist".

I really want to watch Adaptation now, but I can't remember if I own it!  My movie collection has gotten intimidating and large

[TVC15]

I do have Being John Malkovich in glorious Sonykiller HD-DVD format.

[TVC15]

I do have Being John Malkovich in glorious Sonykiller HD-DVD format.

This was the first movie our family ever owned on DVD and I have it on my computer here at work.  Yet...I've never watched it.  Never even started to watch it.  I don't know why, as I hear it's pretty awesome and I would expect it to be so.

You should check it out.  It's of a similar level of quality to Adaptation.  I'd have trouble picking between the two.  Like Adaptation, it dances a sweet jig balance between pretentiousness and not taking itself seriously.

[Ichirou]

Forgotten Ancient: You want to talk "elitist"? Jesus, just look at Shake.  The guy pretended to be a filmmaker back on GAF and spoke authoritatively about shit he knew absolutely nothing about.  When he was schooled by more knowledgeable forum members, he just became more irritating and annoying (I still remember the thread where people were mocking The Departed, Shake trying to get a rise out of Willco by telling him Sam Raimi will never get an Oscar, lawwwwwl).

I regret nothing!

[Phoenix Dark]

Outside of TVC and Ichi there are no "experts" here, only snobs and pretentious jerks who propagate a vast elitist wing conspiracy

 

[Ichirou]

Not asking you to regret anything...I just don't see how this thread was warranted.  Ahh well, I guess I've derailed enough.  Carry on.

I dunno, man.  The script is out there for anybody to read.  It's one thing to post pictures of Shake cross-dressing or doing drugs *cough*, quite another to post a thread about something Shake himself put out there for public consumption.

[Van Cruncheon]

Outside of TVC and Ichi there are no "experts" here, only snobs and pretentious jerks who propagate a vast elitist wing conspiracy

please remember this when tvc corrects your cinematic distinguished mentally-challenged

[Eric P]

Outside of TVC and Ichi there are no "experts" here, only snobs and pretentious jerks who propagate a vast elitist wing conspiracy

 

i'm sorry, i can't hear you over my oscar micheaux film marathon.

[lordmaji]

Outside of TVC and Ichi there are no "experts" here, only snobs and pretentious jerks who propagate a vast elitist wing conspiracy

 

Jesus loves you.

[Solo]

This has turned into quite a thread.

[Ichirou]

Yeah, I know.  It's weird to me how people assume I'm just picking on Shake with ulterior motives.  I also made a thread a while back making fun of Andrew Vestal for comparing Final Fantasy VII to Shakespeare (this was back when Vestal was a teenager, so it's just more proof that I'm more amused by teenage dumbassery than anything else)!  I'm an equal opportunity asshole, basically.

[lordmaji]

Yeah, I know.  It's weird to me how people assume I'm just picking on Shake with ulterior motives.  I also made a thread a while back making fun of Andrew Vestal for comparing Final Fantasy VII to Shakespeare (this was back when Vestal was a teenager, so it's just more proof that I'm more amused by teenage dumbassery than anything else)!  I'm an equal opportunity asshole, basically.

Sweet. Does your services work w/ affirmative action too?

[CajoleJuice]

He's at Mupepe.com with the rest of the gang

We'll be in control of EB in 4 years. TVC/Drinky/MAF will be too OLD for the internet

You say that like it's a bad thing.  I'll be glad when I'm gone from these forums.  Fuck EB, you can have it.

Same here. Goes for any forum, really.

spoiler (click to show/hide)

:'(

[close]

You're why I got Pidgin! MSN!

[Ichirou]

Yeah, I know.  It's weird to me how people assume I'm just picking on Shake with ulterior motives.  I also made a thread a while back making fun of Andrew Vestal for comparing Final Fantasy VII to Shakespeare (this was back when Vestal was a teenager, so it's just more proof that I'm more amused by teenage dumbassery than anything else)!  I'm an equal opportunity asshole, basically.

Sweet. Does your services work w/ affirmative action too?

Yes, but I prefer to make fun of white people.  They're usually dumber and more self-righteous.

[Cheebs]

bump 

[The Dark Shake 3000]

dump

[Cheebs]

dump

I clicked the pdf link and it's dead. Where is the script?  :'(

[The Dark Shake 3000]

It is GONE forever.

[Joe Molotov]

I saved a copy.

spoiler (click to show/hide)

No I didn't.

[close]

[Ichirou]

I actually did save a copy, but it died along with my old laptop's hard drive. :'(

spoiler (click to show/hide)

I actually never read through the whole thing, just skimmed it.

[close]

P.S. I'm locking this two-year-old thread.