ATTN LAZY PEOPLE:
I know your kind. As a fellow lazy I know how hard it is to get motivated, but hear me out. There is a way to lose weight while still being lazy. All you've got to do is change your diet and start working out. And I know yer like "lol, but I'm lazy I don't want to work out." But I'm telling you tards: GET A FUCKING BOWFLEX.
I go to the gym but I don't go as often as I should, mainly because I'm socially introverted and don't like crowds. The same probably applies to you guys. Having a BOWFLEX in your home ensures that you don't have to deal with the lusty stares of studs or the glares of older women in the gym. IF YOU CAN SPEND THOUSANDS OF DOLLARS A YEAR ON CHILDREN'S GAMES YOU CAN AFFORD A BOWFLEX.
Just set it up somewhere near a TV, and you'll be able to do your reps while watching your favorite anime programming.
DIET: It's important. Stop going to fast food places, they only ruin your body. Stop binging on juice; if you want fruit, eat one. Start drinking water. If you must have some type of sugary liquid get some Gaterade or iced tea.
Breakfast: You've gotta go to work, you don't have time for a monster breakfast right? Oatmeal can be fixed in a few minutes. Maybe have an egg or two during the weekends. Want to kill yourself, or worse, wind up obese? Keep eating those Jimmy Dean microwave breakfast meals. They taste so good, but it's not worth it. I can understand eating one when you've got no time for anything else, but under normal circumstances stay away
Lunch: You're at work and you can't drive back home to cook so you look for the easy solution: fast food. Is that the situation? It won't work once you're 40, and some of you ARE ON YOUR WAY THERE. Chicken breasts are tasty, healthy, and easy to make. Wanna spend your money wisely? BUY A GEORGE FOREMAN GRILL. If you have a kitchen area at work or even a cafe you'll be able to plug it up and fix your meals. Add some spices and you'll be eating in 10 minutes. Don't have the time? Then fix the chicken breasts in the morning and bring them to work in a lunchbox. Also, eat a salad dammit. Two chicken breasts and a salad will do the job.
Dinner: More chicken breasts. If you don't want more, eat some tuna. As long as you don't eat something full of fat you can do whatever you want I suppose. Dinner is an excuse to try new things. Try to make some spaghetti. Make some hamburgers, but make sure you use ground chuck beef. It's healthier than the substitute. Being able to cook a few items is going to be a plus IF you start dating women. Cohen is married. Why? He can cook and can afford horses. Take notes fellas
Snacks: Mmmm chips. Mmmm cheetos. Mmmm ice cream. STOP IT. You can eat them every now and then, but it's time to pick a new snack. Salted peanuts are a great source for protein. Eat them.
Workin out: Use the Boxflew three times a week. Maybe you should start off by using it twice a week, then move to three when you're ready. As I said earlier, you can do the reps at your own pace while watching TV or listening to music.
Here's a tough situation for a lazy. You don't want to put too much effort into things, but you know you need cardio. Well what do you do? I'm going to just assume you guys don't want to jog or run. How about you take your MP3 device, put on some nice shoes, and go for a walk around the neighborhood once a week? Just one day, maybe a sunday. That shouldn't be hard. The walking will work your legs, and of course the Boxflew will work on your arms and boobs.
