woo Phoenix airport has free internet woo

[Howard Alan Treesong]

I am eating some blue corn quesadillas and drinking a mangorita and browsin the BORE

can't wait to get home!!!

[TVC15]

Did you impregnate any bridesmaids or not?

[Howard Alan Treesong]

wedding was total poonani failure. there were only TWO single girls at the entire wedding, and one of them spent the entire week being a reclusive bitch. the other one was very cute and we hit it off okay, but she got way too drunk at the wedding, overshooting "let's make out" and landing straight into "weepy mess." I don't hold it against her, everyone has their Drunk Moments, but it made it hard to stick my tongue down her throat.

[Howard Alan Treesong]

addendum: she may be moving to CA in ~6 months. So, I'll stay in touch.

I've decided that if I want to meet the kind of girls I want to meet, I need to start spoofing my way onto graduate student listservs.

afk, blue corn quesadillas

[Phoenix Dark]

Two single girls at a wedding? WTF

[Howard Alan Treesong]

yeah I was totally smh at the bride this morning

Bride: So, did you get some last night?
Patel: Uh, there were only two single girls at your entire wedding. One was a bitch and the other was incapacitated.
Bride: ...oh, yeah. I guess I kind of failed you there, huh.
Patel: smh

[recursivelyenumerable]

PHOENIX AIRPORT 

I spent two entire days there last summer due to flight cancellations.  The stupid carpet pattern is burned into my brain.

[Howard Alan Treesong]

well, at least there was free net, amirite

boarding begins now, I should get to my gate

[Phoenix Dark]

smh indeed. a man of your quality deserves a woman. who can resist your all powerful widow's peak

[recursivelyenumerable]

I didn't have a laptop at the time, and hadn't slept so I couldn't make much progress in my math books

[Howard Alan Treesong]

I would play her vajayjay like a LIQUINTH^TM

[Howard Alan Treesong]

oh, I won the garter toss, though!

I'm not sure what this means exactly, but I think it boils down to me getting to put my dick in somebody ASAP.

[Ichirou]

smh indeed. a man of your quality deserves a woman. who can resist your all powerful widow's peak

That's mean, dude.  Don't bring attention to the fact that he's balding.

[drozmight]

oh, I won the garter toss, though!

I'm not sure what this means exactly, but I think it boils down to me getting to put my dick in somebody ASAP.

You're going to mistake a Korean man for a woman aren't you?

[The Fake Shemp]

Haha, I was just at Phoenix airport five days ago.

[Bloodwake]

I just wanted to know I laughed at your SMH for like ten seconds. It was great.

Sucks that she overshot let's make out. That happened to me on Wednesday. I was hanging out with this Ellen Page doppleganger that my friends knew from WKU who had come to visit. She overshot let's make out and went straight to "I can't walk, time to crash in the nearest bed"

It happened to be MY bed with ME, but there wasn't any sex sadly. She was asleep in two seconds. Then, when she was sober, she saw that my room was a mess from the last time I got drunk and didn't want anything to do with me for the rest of her visit.

SMH at MYSELF.

Oh well, this other unrelated girl definitely wants me now though, so whatever.

[brawndolicious]

you might have a new friend in 6 months! WOO :rapetime

vajayjay

I've heard this a lot on forums but I heard it for the first time in real life a few days ago.  Some woman calls the wrong number and leaves my friend a voicemail that was congratulating a woman on her new baby saying "the little dinosaur that came out of your vajayjay".  she must have been embarassed as hell when my friend called her back.