Author Topic: tonight is CONAN night (Read 2319 times)

Van Cruncheon · « **on:** May 27, 2008, 09:33:06 PM »

i am going to watch BARBARIAN and DESTROYER back-to-back. you cannot stop me.

"by crom, i will have your assholes hoisted and fucked before this evening is through, evilbore!"

BobFromPikeCreek · « **Reply #1 on:** May 27, 2008, 09:33:53 PM »

I did this exact thing with my friend literally two days ago. It was his first time, and he had bought a double pack.

Oh, he learned what is good in life.

The Fake Shemp · « **Reply #2 on:** May 27, 2008, 09:34:19 PM »

Conan the Barbarian

YOU WILL BELIEVE OLIVER STONE CAN WRITE AN ENTERTAINING MOVIE!!!

Van Cruncheon · « **Reply #3 on:** May 27, 2008, 09:34:51 PM »

john milius and oliver stone

BobFromPikeCreek · « **Reply #4 on:** May 27, 2008, 09:37:11 PM »

No homo.

Joe Molotov · « **Reply #5 on:** May 27, 2008, 09:37:51 PM »

More accurate would be to say that not even Oliver Stone can mess up a movie made by John "RED DAWN" Milius.

The Fake Shemp · « **Reply #6 on:** May 27, 2008, 09:38:28 PM »

Quote from: Professor Prole on May 27, 2008, 09:34:51 PM

john milius and oliver stone

The screenplay was pretty much all Oliver Stone. Milius just changed some beats, characters and dialogue. He still deserves his credit. That movie just rocks. I totally dig Milius as a director, but I'm hard pressed to come up with another awesome flick he directed when TVC 15 gives me the second degree on my Milius man crush.

The Fake Shemp · « **Reply #7 on:** May 27, 2008, 09:42:07 PM »

I was just informed by someone that Oliver Stone's script is insane and that Milius cleaned it up. Maybe Milius > Stone.

Eric P · « **Reply #8 on:** May 27, 2008, 10:06:38 PM »

as a conan fan, i didn't like this movie series at all but i can see where others would get enjoyment.

Van Cruncheon · « **Reply #9 on:** May 27, 2008, 10:07:16 PM »

destroyer is awful -- as is red sonja -- but barbarian is GREAT fuckin' camp.

Eric P · « **Reply #10 on:** May 27, 2008, 10:07:41 PM »

if i want camp, i have deathstalker.

[youtube=425,350]KA42DDrjrUQ[/youtube]

The Fake Shemp · « **Reply #11 on:** May 27, 2008, 10:07:54 PM »

Yeah, Barbarian is awesome.

Van Cruncheon · « **Reply #12 on:** May 27, 2008, 10:08:27 PM »

deathstalker -- wasn't that on mst3k once?

Eric P · « **Reply #13 on:** May 27, 2008, 10:11:01 PM »

that was deathstalker 2 or something

[youtube=425,350]LFXUhZHbD2Y[/youtube]

Eric P · « **Reply #14 on:** May 27, 2008, 10:11:34 PM »

Deathstalker and the Warriors from Hell
season 7 episode 3

Van Cruncheon · « **Reply #15 on:** May 27, 2008, 10:15:00 PM »

POTATOES ARE WHAT WE EAT.

HORSES ARE WHAT WE RIDE.

Joe Molotov · « **Reply #16 on:** May 27, 2008, 10:16:17 PM »

Quote from: Professor Prole on May 27, 2008, 10:08:27 PM

deathstalker -- wasn't that on mst3k once?

The 3rd one was on MST3k. It's the second one that's brilliant though. Deathstalker 2 is possibly the greatest bad movie ever ever filmed.

Brehvolution · « **Reply #17 on:** May 27, 2008, 10:21:26 PM »

Is it true that Conan:HA is a 32 GB install?

And people complain about the PS3.

pilonv1 · « **Reply #18 on:** May 27, 2008, 10:27:51 PM »

i bet you cant wait for the new Conan movie with HHH in the lead role

MrAngryFace · « **Reply #19 on:** May 27, 2008, 10:45:54 PM »

WRASSLER

pilonv1 · « **Reply #20 on:** May 27, 2008, 10:49:17 PM »

TRIPLE HAITCH

Van Cruncheon · « **Reply #21 on:** May 27, 2008, 11:01:45 PM »

young conan looks like linda hamilton

MrAngryFace · « **Reply #22 on:** May 27, 2008, 11:36:36 PM »

Linda Hamilton looks like Young Conan!

Van Cruncheon · « **Reply #23 on:** May 27, 2008, 11:37:20 PM »

haha, i love the demon fuck scene when he tosses her into the fireplace

Van Cruncheon · « **Reply #24 on:** May 27, 2008, 11:40:47 PM »

...and when he coldcocks the camel

Van Cruncheon · « **Reply #25 on:** May 27, 2008, 11:48:26 PM »

this movie doesn't skimp on the titties!

BobFromPikeCreek · « **Reply #26 on:** May 27, 2008, 11:57:27 PM »

Quote from: Professor Prole on May 27, 2008, 11:40:47 PM

...and when he coldcocks the camel

Look at that!! Can you believe it?!

Van Cruncheon · « **Reply #27 on:** May 27, 2008, 11:58:36 PM »

his previous line was him grunting "they're all SLUTS" at a bunch of women

Joe Molotov · « **Reply #28 on:** May 28, 2008, 12:01:39 AM »

Quote from: Professor Prole on May 27, 2008, 11:40:47 PM

...and when he coldcocks the camel

I think in Conan the Destroyer he punches a camel and a horse.

Van Cruncheon · « **Reply #29 on:** May 28, 2008, 12:09:39 AM »

haha, i forgot that the followers of thulsa doom were dirty wussy HIPPIES.

john milius is an AWESOME republican, as he acknowledges the only thing worth doing as a conservative is putting a boot in a flower child's lazy ass

also, BEST LINE OF ALL TIME:

Quote from: Conan

Crom, I have never prayed to you before. I have no tongue for it. No one, not even you, will remember if we were good men or bad. Why we fought, or why we died. All that matters is that two stood against many. That's what's important! Valor pleases you, Crom... so grant me one request. Grant me revenge! And if you do not listen, then to HELL with you!

MrAngryFace · « **Reply #30 on:** May 28, 2008, 12:15:09 AM »

Lemme borrow conan, Im waiting on blugay release

Van Cruncheon · « **Reply #31 on:** May 28, 2008, 12:16:50 AM »

will do!

Van Cruncheon · « **Reply #32 on:** May 28, 2008, 12:17:59 AM »

james earl jones

man, the tree of woe sucks! :'(

spoiler (click to show/hide)

...except when it brings a tasty vulture snack!

[close]

Joe Molotov · « **Reply #33 on:** May 28, 2008, 12:19:01 AM »

Conan the Barbarian has an awesome score too.

[youtube=425,350]onGWF8mz1Zw[/youtube]

Riddle of Steel

BobFromPikeCreek · « **Reply #34 on:** May 28, 2008, 12:19:55 AM »

Quote from: Professor Prole on May 28, 2008, 12:17:59 AM

james earl jones

man, the tree of woe sucks! :'(

It just helps develop my theory that Conan is jesus.

Van Cruncheon · « **Reply #35 on:** May 28, 2008, 01:28:11 AM »

starting DESTROYER

i forgot about the godawful comic relief thief guy :'(

Van Cruncheon · « **Reply #36 on:** May 28, 2008, 01:30:01 AM »

oh my god he DOES punch a horse out

Ecrofirt · « **Reply #37 on:** May 28, 2008, 01:35:28 AM »

Barbarian would be better if he wasn't wearing that awful wig.

Joe Molotov · « **Reply #38 on:** May 28, 2008, 01:37:26 AM »

Quote from: Professor Prole on May 28, 2008, 01:30:01 AM

oh my god he DOES punch a horse out

Sadly, that's probably the best part of the movie. $:-\$

I mean, you'd think having Arnold, Grace Jones, and Wilt Chamberlain in a movie together would be an automatic recipe for awesomeness, but no.

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #39 on:** May 28, 2008, 01:39:27 AM »

i love the beginning of that movie, from Conan's father explaining the riddle of steal to Conan's momma getting owned :'(

Joe Molotov · « **Reply #40 on:** May 28, 2008, 01:41:24 AM »

I like how it shows him working on the wheel as a little kid, and the other slaves start dropping off until finally it's just him as adult Conan pushing the wheel by himself.

BobFromPikeCreek · « **Reply #41 on:** May 28, 2008, 01:58:54 AM »

I like the running montage. Those two never get tired.

Narag · « **Reply #42 on:** May 28, 2008, 02:07:51 AM »

Fucking hated the Destroyer and it wasn't until a couple years back I finally understood why. There was too much dialogue in it compared the bare minimum needed in Barbarian.

drozmight · « **Reply #43 on:** May 28, 2008, 03:37:19 AM »

Quote from: Eric P on May 27, 2008, 10:07:41 PM

if i want camp, i have deathstalker.

[youtube=425,350]KA42DDrjrUQ[/youtube]

The first part of this video = a restaurant I'd like to open.

TVC15 · « **Reply #44 on:** May 28, 2008, 02:54:21 PM »

Conan the Destroyer has Grace Jones, thus all you haters are fucking gays.

Eric P · « **Reply #45 on:** May 28, 2008, 03:00:19 PM »

Quote from: TVC 15 on May 28, 2008, 02:54:21 PM

Conan the Destroyer has Grace Jones, thus all you haters are fucking gays.

i would argue the exact opposite

she's not really a straight icon

she is however a gay icon

TVC15 · « **Reply #46 on:** May 28, 2008, 03:05:17 PM »

Quote from: Eric P on May 28, 2008, 03:00:19 PM

Quote from: TVC 15 on May 28, 2008, 02:54:21 PM
Conan the Destroyer has Grace Jones, thus all you haters are fucking gays.

i would argue the exact opposite

she's not really a straight icon

she is however a gay icon

Are you saying you have to to be gay to appreciate Slave to the Rhythm?

DJ_Tet · « **Reply #47 on:** May 28, 2008, 03:09:10 PM »

Destroyer is way better than Barbarian, despite the addition of Grace Jones and subtraction of bare breasts.

Eric P · « **Reply #48 on:** May 28, 2008, 03:16:02 PM »

Quote from: TVC 15 on May 28, 2008, 03:05:17 PM

Quote from: Eric P on May 28, 2008, 03:00:19 PM
Quote from: TVC 15 on May 28, 2008, 02:54:21 PM
Conan the Destroyer has Grace Jones, thus all you haters are fucking gays.

i would argue the exact opposite

she's not really a straight icon

she is however a gay icon

Are you saying you have to to be gay to appreciate Slave to the Rhythm?

not out loud or anything

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #49 on:** May 28, 2008, 03:18:34 PM »

grace jones could probably break your dick off with her vagina

TVC15 · « **Reply #50 on:** May 28, 2008, 04:24:44 PM »

[youtube=425,350]cpAOzBmeaMo[/youtube].

Oblivion · « **Reply #51 on:** May 28, 2008, 06:00:33 PM »

This movie's awesome because Basil Poledouris' Riders of Doom was used in the 3D Zelda trailers.

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Author Topic: tonight is CONAN night (Read 2319 times)