I'm a part time worker, who recently asked to return to full-time work in the same company. I KNOW there's vacancies, and I'm a good worker that could quite easily be taking on better work if offered promotion. I'm also in a shit state with money at the moment, so more work or better paid work is exactly what I'm looking for. Naturally, I started asking my boss about it and it looked like it was all going well...
Until some vindictive shit, that leaves our place for a new job himself this week, piped up and raised concerns about my timekeeping which made management reject the proposal. I explained to the cunting shit in question that a corruption in our online flexi-time system makes my timekeeping prior to June 6 look worse than it was, and to check the note on my file that backs me up on that. He emailed me back as well as someone in upper management saying "but tom, we had a meeting together", and we "discussed" and "agreed" all these things. I was so pissed off, because I did no such thing, and I trusted him enough to not have anyone present (like a Union rep) in the meeting with me. Since then, he's done everything to make my life hell. Declining requests to leave even though I have no work to do for example. They'd known for weeks I wanted it off cos it coincides with my friends' leave. Management, naturally back their own, so when I complained about the guy to his higher ups, it fell on deaf ears. He leaves this week, so I'm not too bothered about the friction there... The main thing I'm annoyed about is the setback on getting full-time employment. I fucking NEED more money. This CUNT has made my next month or so deliberately shit on purpose. What annoys me more is that while I was trying to arrange the employment through these channels, I've missed employment opportunities elsewhere. And the guy who did all this to me is fucking useless. He walks around building chatting and gossiping like an old fish wife to all the women and claims credit for everyone's hard work underneath him. I could do what he does in my fucking sleep. And thats not blind arrogance, I actually could. I am wasted in my job, and this has finally made me pissed off enough to do something about it. I immediately began looking for new jobs.
But I also sat there today thinking about what a cunt everyone is, and how I could probably murder someone right now and getting thrown in jail wouldn't make me feel any worse about my life. Genuine homicidal thoughts. I was staring at my letter opener and thinking about going for the jugular of this vindictive pleb. The blood is on the floor in 4 minutes according to Zohan. I hope he gets an Anally Injected Death Sentence. I found myself thinking I want to hurt someone, preferably someone who deserves it. Maybe go to a club, just watch people and stab the first person who starts a fight. Go out and fucking batter the first little hooded chav cunt that tries to intimidate innocent local people for no reason... and taking that thought further, because they typically have rough family that would want to murder me, I'd have to get them to, maybe plan it, find out where they live and do something to their house.
And funnily enough, whilst having this noisy rage boiling inbetween my ears, I got more work done today than ever. It really fired me up.
Bottom line though -- my current pay is shit, I work for a bunch of cunts, I'm 25, I stay up too late on videogames or the internet, so every day I've got bags under my eyes, my skin looks tired as fuck like its about to peel off, and I also have the mother of all disabilities - ginger hair. My circle of friends is awesome but at the same time its almost too close and insular. I'm never going to meet the woman of my dreams if I continue like this, let me put it that way. The women that I *have* met and had some fun with were either fucking all and sundry or just used me like a thing of convenience while I thought it was something else. And I put that down to being too "nice". Apparently you don't get anywhere in this world unless you're fucking horrible to everyone. Its depressing. Luckily I'm too much of a coward to an hero / seppuku / suicide.
Part of me feels bad for getting so worked up, when it could be worse. I mean, I could be in Georgia, Sudan, Zimbabwe, Palestine, etc, I have a roof over my head, food and board... but being born with priviledge doesn't mean I have to suffer other priviledged people who choose to be cunts surely?
There's a job opening in Reindahlen, Germany I'm thinking of applying for. A few jobs up and down the country here in the UK. What do you think?
Kill someone or move away and start life all over again?
