oh oh I know!
I would buy up junk loans from companies that were stupid enough to make them. Thereby artificially bouying a sinking market, and keeping the same people that were stupid enough to make these decisions in power so that instead of having a big crash that will eventually self correct over a few years now I'd create a Schaivo'd market that will have a much huger collapse that might take decades to self correct later and then I'll still be 700 billion in the hole!
Man, I gotta tell Washington about this.