Some women in the office are talking about The Secret

[mojovonio]

I feel like walking over there, and just rolling my eyes.

"It really really changed my attitude and my outlook on life."

no, it really didn't.

[muckhole]

Positive thinking!

[Tauntaun]

What's The Secret, some woman power movie?     Go and punch 'em in the face Nicolas Cage style!

[abrader]

Secret is real dood.

spoiler (click to show/hide)

Oprah owes her wealth to Satan

[close]

[Tauntaun]

What's The Secret, some woman power movie?     Go and punch 'em in the face Nicolas Cage style!

I worked at Chapters when it came out. And it actually was a secret as to what this amazing new way of thinking is, that will change you forever.

All it was was "think positive, ad positive will happen to you!"

Oh I see, so they basically took a fortune cookie and turned into a self help book. 

[muckhole]

Oh I see, so they basically took a fortune cookie and turned into a self help book. 

  And a movie, and a big pile of money, so I guess it worked for them.

Right now I'm Thinking Positively about waffles. Mmmm.

[The Fake Shemp]

Strange. I have only received pleasurable items and situations by worshiping the Dark Lord (ruler of all of Hell!) and wishing ill will onto others.

[TakingBackSunday]

When I worked at Borders, a normal day for me would be selling just about 30 or so copies of the Secret, the Last Lecture, and that hack Patterson's line of books.

[Olivia Wilde Homo]

The Secret is obvious.

What made it huge was:

1) Appealed to Americans in the sense that you were told it was not hard to get the things you want.  Just imagine it and it is there.
2) A lot of Da Vinci Code shit and mystic music playing in the background, which is scientifically proven to make 80% of housewives' panties wet.
3) It was on Oprah.

[tiesto]

The Secret is obvious.

What made it huge was:

1) Appealed to Americans in the sense that you were told it was not hard to get the things you want.  Just imagine it and it is there.
2) A lot of Da Vinci Code shit and mystic music playing in the background, which is scientifically proven to make 80% of housewives' panties wet.
3) It was on Oprah.

It's funny how much mysticism and cheesy 'spiritual' type stuff and astrology and celtic lore gets women wet. Part of game theory mentions learning how to palm read and telling the girls about horoscope compatibility on a date.

[The Fake Shemp]

Often times on dates, I wear traditional Druid garments and talk about astrology. Women cannot resist this.

[Tauntaun]

Oh I see, so they basically took a fortune cookie and turned into a self help book. 

  And a movie, and a big pile of money, so I guess it worked for them.

Right now I'm Thinking Positively about waffles. Mmmm.

You're positive thinking is out of step though, first you must think positively for a woman who can positively cook you waffles. 

[Barry Egan]

have any of you actually watched the secret?  It's even more absurd then just repacking the idea of positive thinking and selling it for 20 dollars.  The movie showcases a guy who started thinking about money and money started appearing in his mailbox in blank envelopes.  What goes through the minds of the people who buy in to this stuff after a month or so of nothing happening? 

[duckman2000]

My neighbors tried to push this on us for a while. I think they realized after a few tries that I have a clearer view of the world than they will ever have, so it's rarely brought up. Occasionally, the guy will repeat some line that sounds ripped directly from it, and I'll call him on it. They have sheets of life advise framed on the walls and on their table. If it works for them, hey. It's quite the industry though, isn't it?

[duckman2000]

have any of you actually watched the secret?  It's even more absurd then just repacking the idea of positive thinking and selling it for 20 dollars.  The movie showcases a guy who started thinking about money and money started appearing in his mailbox in blank envelopes.  What goes through the minds of the people who buy in to this stuff after a month or so of nothing happening? 

These neighbors tried to have us watch the movie, which of course never happened. I have about as much interest in watching that as I do watching Lifetime movies. What is it with Americans having to complicate everything, and needing written/spoken guides to adhere to common sense? Every little piece of life advise that they have quoted have seemed like pretty basic stuff. Is it just that the American sense of entitlement becomes challenged by reality, and books like these make people think that there is a plan to everything?

[MrAngryFace]

Is The Secret just the old Pay it Forward thing? I do that already

[muckhole]

Is The Secret just the old Pay it Forward thing? I do that already

I think it shares more in common with wishing upon a star. Think positive, and you'll get everything you want.

[modkennylaine]

Salon had a good article on it. http://www.salon.com/mwt/feature/2007/03/05/the_secret/index.html

I can't find the article about Oprah having to tell a woman who didn't want to seek medical help for her cancer about not just relying on 'positive thinking' and 'The Secret', unfortunately.

[MrAngryFace]

Is The Secret just the old Pay it Forward thing? I do that already

I think it shares more in common with wishing upon a star. Think positive, and you'll get everything you want.

Oh wow, wtf kinda load o shit is that.

[duckman2000]

The real racket isn't in the book and movie sales, but in these "inspirational" packages of flyers and posters to help you keep on track with The Secret. It's remarkable. Maybe we should all contribute to a self-help program, "Evil Living: How to get Satan on Your Side" or some such. I want to be rich, and I have no qualms with ripping off willing subjects.

[muckhole]

I would think TVC could write up a pretty inspired motivational book. We just need to get him on Oprah.

[duckman2000]

Me, Prole and others in the parent-bore can get to work on the "The power of neglect, negative attention and selective profanity" section. The only target audience more willing to spend money on help than disillusioned housewives would be the panicky parent segment. We will tell them that hey, you're doing just fine.

[duckman2000]

See, that doesn't entirely mesh with the behavior of the neighbors. If anything, they have explanations that are entirely grabbed from their asses. I'm thinking it's a combination of not watching news, and believing in whatever an email from a friend tells them about something.

And since we're on the subject of miraculous things, and things that my neighbors enjoy...

http://www.miraclesoap.com/

Check out the Product History

[Tauntaun]

Salon had a good article on it. http://www.salon.com/mwt/feature/2007/03/05/the_secret/index.html

I can't find the article about Oprah having to tell a woman who didn't want to seek medical help for her cancer about not just relying on 'positive thinking' and 'The Secret', unfortunately.

That article is fucking awesome.

And worse than the idiocy and the bullshitting is its anti-intellectualism, because that's at the root of the other two. Here's "The Secret" on reading and, um, electricity: "When I discovered 'The Secret' I made a decision that I would not watch the news or read newspapers anymore, because it did not make me feel good," and, "How does it work? Nobody knows. Just like nobody knows how electricity works. I don't, do you?

Well obviously someone knows how it works IF IT WAS INVENTED!  Wow, I haven't heard of this crap before.

[Tauntaun]

What if someone says "yes, I do.", what will his rebuttal be then.

"Uhhh, no you don't!"

More like, "This conversation isn't making me happy, ttyl."


smh

[muckhole]

And since we're on the subject of miraculous things, and things that my neighbors enjoy...

http://www.miraclesoap.com/

The days following this I began to assemble and mix this product. The voice of God told me what to name it and how to package it.

On the 17th day of April 1982 at 9:00 a.m., the lady called me and said, "Mr. Tedeton, for the last two months the Lord has instructed me to write a set of instructions for that product that you brought me.

PRODUCT DISCLAIMERS
ALL INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE, INCLUDING INFORMATION RELATING TO MEDICAL AND HEALTH CONDITIONS, PRODUCTS AND TREATMENTS, IS FOR INFORMATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY. IT IS NOT MEANT TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR THE ADVICE PROVIDED BY YOUR OWN PHYSICIAN OR OTHER MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL OR ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON OR IN ANY PRODUCT PACKAGING OR LABELS. YOU SHOULD NOT USE THE INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE FOR DIAGNOSING OR TREATING A HEALTH PROBLEM OR DISEASE OR PRESCRIBING ANY MEDICATION. YOU SHOULD CAREFULLY READ ALL INFORMATION PROVIDED BY THE MANUFACTURERS OF THE PRODUCTS ON OR IN THE PRODUCT PACKAGING AND LABELS BEFORE USING ANY PRODUCT PURCHASED ON THE SITE. YOU SHOULD ALWAYS CONSULT YOUR OWN PHYSICIAN AND MEDICAL ADVISORS. INFORMATION AND STATEMENTS REGARDING MIRACLE SOAP PRODUCTS HAVE NOT BEEN EVALUATED BY THE FOOD AND DRUG ADMINISTRATION AND ARE NOT INTENDED TO DIAGNOSE, TREAT, CURE, OR PREVENT ANY DISEASE. ANY CLAIMS CONCERNING THE EFFECTIVENESS OF THE MIRACLE II PRODUCTS ARE LIMITED TO THE EXPERIENCES OF THE PERSON OR GROUP OF PERSONS MAKING SUCH CLAIM.

The best part:

SUBMISSIONS
MiracleSoap, Inc., appreciates hearing from its customers. By submitting your creative ideas, inventions, suggestions or materials (your "submission") you grant MiracleSoap, Inc., a royalty-free, perpetual and irrevocable, non-exclusive license to use, reproduce, modify, adapt, publish, translate, create derivative works from, distribute, communicate to the public, perform and display your submission (in whole or in part) worldwide and to incorporate your submission in other works in any form, media, or technology now known or later developed without any notice or compensation to you. You also represent and warrant that you are authorized to grant the foregoing license or testimonial and you shall indemnify and hold harmless MiracleSoap, Inc., from and against any claims from or by any third party alledging infringement of said third party's rights.

God really covered all his legal bases with this venture.

[duckman2000]

 

[muckhole]

  Awesome.

[Don Flamenco]

The real racket isn't in the book and movie sales, but in these "inspirational" packages of flyers and posters to help you keep on track with The Secret. It's remarkable. Maybe we should all contribute to a self-help program, "Evil Living: How to get Satan on Your Side" or some such. I want to be rich, and I have no qualms with ripping off willing subjects.

speaking of which, I've seen that "Left Behind" PC game all over the place.  I think God is telling me to stop being jewish and buy his game that he made.

[Howard Alan Treesong]

I can't find the article about Oprah having to tell a woman who didn't want to seek medical help for her cancer about not just relying on 'positive thinking' and 'The Secret', unfortunately.

A joke:

A religious man is on the roof of a burning house. The fire company holds the trampolene and tells him to jump. He says: "No, God will save me." A helicopter and lowers a ladder to him and tells him to climb. He says: "God will save me." Then the house collapses, he dies and goes to heaven. He asks God why he didn't save him. God answers: "I sent the fire company and the helicopter. What more did you want?"

Or as the Russians put it:

"Pray to God, but row to shore."

[duckman2000]

There seems to be a connection between Lifetime movie watchers and fans of The Secret. I guess watching actors go through misery and win a million bucks (and Santa Claus turning out to be Jesus, who gives the couple back their lost child), all set to a sentimental soundtrack and smeared in Vaseline, meshes well with the world view that The Secret provides.

[etiolate]

have any of you actually watched the secret?  It's even more absurd then just repacking the idea of positive thinking and selling it for 20 dollars.  The movie showcases a guy who started thinking about money and money started appearing in his mailbox in blank envelopes.  What goes through the minds of the people who buy in to this stuff after a month or so of nothing happening? 

Hopefully, they kill themselves.

so The Secret then is really The Happening?

[Phoenix Dark]

smh you guys are behind the self-help curb. it's all about New Earth now  :zelda

[Barry Egan]

smh you guys are behind the self-help curb. it's all about New Earth now  :zelda

New Earth came out a year before The Secret.  And Eckhart Tolle's has had appearances on Oprah for a while before that.

[Eric P]

Bad Brains started with the aid of a self help book.

Maybe these women are going to start their own punk trend with the help of The Secret

[Great Rumbler]

Positive thinking!

That's the power!

[duckman2000]

Brian,

Please give us a call and I would be happy to talk with you about the Miracle II products and how they may help your pet hamster.  I look forward to talking with you.

Thanks,

John Line
Customer Service
Miraclesoap.com
1-888-895-SOAP (7627)

Ok, Bore.

what's my next move?

You have got to be shitting me.   

[muckhole]

Brian,

Please give us a call and I would be happy to talk with you about the Miracle II products and how they may help your pet hamster.  I look forward to talking with you.

Thanks,

John Line
Customer Service
Miraclesoap.com
1-888-895-SOAP (7627)

Ok, Bore.

what's my next move?

  This just got really interesting.

[Cormacaroni]

Salon had a good article on it. http://www.salon.com/mwt/feature/2007/03/05/the_secret/index.html

I can't find the article about Oprah having to tell a woman who didn't want to seek medical help for her cancer about not just relying on 'positive thinking' and 'The Secret', unfortunately.

That article is fucking awesome.

And worse than the idiocy and the bullshitting is its anti-intellectualism, because that's at the root of the other two. Here's "The Secret" on reading and, um, electricity: "When I discovered 'The Secret' I made a decision that I would not watch the news or read newspapers anymore, because it did not make me feel good," and, "How does it work? Nobody knows. Just like nobody knows how electricity works. I don't, do you?

Well obviously someone knows how it works IF IT WAS INVENTED!  Wow, I haven't heard of this crap before.

Point taken but uhh, electricity didn't need anybody to invent it. It's a naturally-occurring phenomenon.