an IM conversation with a girl I met on OKCupid

[recursivelyenumerable]

              me: why do you periodically remove and readd your picture?

[9: 39: 17 pm]girl: got tired of messages from creepy 40 yrs olds

[9: 40: 09 pm]me: ok

[9: 41: 20 pm]girl: well kinda creepy but otherwise ok

[9: 41: 41 pm]girl: you started college at 13?

[9: 41: 53 pm]me: yeah, but didn't finish

[9: 42: 15 pm]girl: that's gotta be rough socially

[9: 42: 45 pm]me: it was ... what it was

[9: 43: 13 pm]me: I'm still not sure exactly what it was

[9: 43: 29 pm]girl: that's ok

[9: 43: 36 pm]me: I guess I got really absorbed in the Internet then

[9: 43: 54 pm]me: that was my substitute social life, though I didn't think of it that way at the time

[9: 44: 36 pm]me: it didn't bother me that I wasn't talking to people, I didn't feel lonely exactly

[9: 45: 38 pm]girl: sure, but internet is a pretty lame fill in for real human interaction

[9: 46: 18 pm]me: yeah

[9: 48: 09 pm]me: but lately I'll do things like ... mope about feeling lonely and sorry for myself, but then when I get a response from someone I find appealing here, or even meet someone in real life and get her number etc., I don't bother to follow up

[9: 48: 24 pm]girl: that's pretty lame

[9: 48: 25 pm]girl: why not

[9: 48: 28 pm]me: yeah I know

[9: 48: 32 pm]me: I don't know

[9: 49: 01 pm]girl: afraid of rejection?

[9: 49: 07 pm]girl: just lazy?

[9: 49: 36 pm]me: probably

[9: 49: 55 pm]me: I like to think I have some deep interesting reason but it's likely just those

[9: 50: 31 pm]girl: well maybe don't share that with too many people

[9: 50: 37 pm]me: yeah

[9: 50: 43 pm]girl: yeah

[9: 50: 46 pm]me: it's not exactly the most appealing thing to say to someone

[9: 50: 59 pm]me: I don't know why I told you that either

[Vizzys]

i dont know either

[fistfulofmetal]

i think i'm gonna be like you
when i get older

[Mupepe]

jesus christ, dude. 

[Arbys Roast Beef Sandwich]

you started college at 13?

[Madrun Badrun]

I'm so going to be you in a few years.  Except with out knowing how to blow a clarinet 

[Mandark]

That exchange is actually pretty good material right there.

[TakingBackSunday]

yeah

[Bebpo]

good luck!

[recursivelyenumerable]

you started college at 13?

yeah, but didn't finish

[Mandark]

you started college at 13?

yeah, but didn't finish

[Phoenix Dark]

70+ college credits before I graduated high school

washtenaw techinical middle college

[recursivelyenumerable]

That exchange is actually pretty good material right there.

could it be adapted for two vampires, though?

[Mandark]

That exchange is actually pretty good material right there.

could it be adapted for two vampires, though?

No.

With a bit of tweaking, the OP lends itself to a romantic comedy with a winningly vulnerable male lead.

Vampire romance is all about smoldering passion and emotions so intense they approach transcendence.  That's why teenage girls love it.

What you wrote is dialogue for Michael Cera, not Robert Pattinson.




PS I second the werewolf/baby comment, and advise you to make it a buddy cop movie.

[Madrun Badrun]

[9: 39: 17 pm]girl: got tired of messages from creepy lycans

[9: 40: 09 pm]me: ok

[9: 41: 20 pm]girl: well kinda creepy but otherwise ok.  I'm into fur.

[9: 41: 41 pm]girl: you started college at 13?

[9: 41: 53 pm]me: yeah, but didn't finish.  I got caught sucking my professor...of his blood.  Plus it was only night classes for obvious reasons lol (vampire emoticon here)

[9: 42: 15 pm]girl: that's gotta be rough socially

[9: 42: 45 pm]me: it was ... what it was.  It sucked.

[9: 43: 13 pm]me: I'm still not sure exactly what it was.  I was changing. 

[9: 43: 29 pm]girl: that's ok

[9: 43: 36 pm]me: I guess I got really absorbed Internet vamp forums then

[9: 43: 54 pm]me: that was my substitute social life, though I didn't think of it that way at the time

[9: 44: 36 pm]me: it didn't bother me that I wasn't talking to people, I didn't feel lonely exactly.  I still had the cravings though.

[9: 45: 38 pm]girl: sure, but internet is a pretty lame fill in for real human interaction.

[9: 46: 18 pm]me: yeah

[9: 48: 09 pm]me: but lately I'll do things like ... mope about feeling lonely and sorry for myself, but then when I get a response from someone I find appealing here, or even meet someone in real life and get her number etc., I don't bother to follow up.  I just stalk and drain them in the night. 

[9: 48: 24 pm]girl: that's pretty lame

[9: 48: 25 pm]girl: why not

[9: 48: 28 pm]me: yeah I know

[9: 48: 32 pm]me: I don't know

[9: 49: 01 pm]girl: afraid of rejection?

[9: 49: 07 pm]girl: just lazy?

[9: 49: 36 pm]me: probably

[9: 49: 55 pm]me: I like to think I have some deep interesting reason but it's likely just those

[9: 50: 31 pm]girl: well maybe don't share that with too many people

[9: 50: 37 pm]me: yeah

[9: 50: 43 pm]girl: yeah

[9: 50: 46 pm]me: it's not exactly the most appealing thing to say to someone

[9: 50: 59 pm]me: I don't know why I told you that either

[9: 51: 50 pm]me: I VONT TO SUCK YOUR BLOOD!

[9: 53: 32 pm]me: Hello?

[recursivelyenumerable]

but I'm a bunch of years older than michael cera.  doesn't that lend itself somewhat to the vampire angle insofar as vampires are creepy old men under the delusion they're immune to age, who prey on young flesh?

[Mandark]

PS I second the werewolf/baby comment, and advise you to make it a buddy cop movie.

Like cop and a half?

In this case, which one would be the half?

[ToxicAdam]

Why are you intentionally sabotaging your happiness? Do you write lyrics are create art where that could effect your livelihood?

That was the male equivalent of a woman saying "I am so crazy, you don't even know" on the first date.

[recursivelyenumerable]

'cuz

[Mandark]

but I'm a bunch of years older than michael cera.  doesn't that lend itself somewhat to the vampire angle insofar as vampires are creepy old men under the delusion they're immune to age, who prey on young flesh?

That's a surprisingly Puritan-y angle from you.

I do like it more than the current pop culture take on vampires as people whose unique sorrow and torment make them super special.  Now that I think about it, I see how teens became the target audience for this stuff.

[tiesto]

Why are you intentionally sabotaging your happiness? Do you write lyrics are create art where that could effect your livelihood?

That was the male equivalent of a woman saying "I am so crazy, you don't even know" on the first date.

Agreed, no girl is gonna want to get with a person who is gonna make them feel depressed as well. It's a tough cycle to get out of (being depressed b/c you don't have a woman -> women won't be interested in you -> get further depressed) but it's possible.

[demi]

[9: 41: 41 pm]girl: you started college at 13?

[9: 41: 53 pm]me: yeah, but didn't finish

[9: 42: 15 pm]girl: that's gotta be rough socially

LOL!

[demi]

70+ college credits before I graduated high school

washtenaw techinical middle college

And you still cant even build a PC what did they teach you at a technical school?

[Cheebs]

you have to post a picture from her profile sir, come on!

[Barry Egan]

maybe you should let chosen EB members to do your online chatting for you.  Then you might at least get to show some of these girls your exemplary self-flagellation in real life as opposed to over MSN.

[OptimoPeach]

[9: 50: 31 pm]girl: well maybe don't share that with too many people

[9: 50: 37 pm]me: yeah

[9: 50: 43 pm]girl: yeah

omg

[Madrun Badrun]

Why are you intentionally sabotaging your happiness? Do you write lyrics are create art where that could effect your livelihood?

That was the male equivalent of a woman saying "I am so crazy, you don't even know" on the first date.

Agreed, no girl is gonna want to get with a person who is gonna make them feel depressed as well. It's a tough cycle to get out of (being depressed b/c you don't have a woman -> women won't be interested in you -> get further depressed) but it's possible.

lies.  it's totally impossible. 

[WrikaWrek]

How the fuck could you start college at 13?

Isn't that University?

[recursivelyenumerable]

I took the SAT when I was 12 under some gifted program and got the highest score of any 12-year-old taking the test under that program that year (got a scholarship out of it too).  That was part of it.

[Madrun Badrun]

cool.  So what school did you go to, what did you take and how long did you last?

[recursivelyenumerable]

Eight years.

[Don Flamenco]

holy shit.  here I am just happy to be graduating at 27.   

[recursivelyenumerable]

But you're still younger than I will be when/if I ever graduate!

[Don Flamenco]

just major in sociology.  they give you a BA for breathing and praising Marx.  okay, i guess that's a harsh exaggeration.

[drew]

i recommend drugs

[Madrun Badrun]

But you're still younger than I will be when/if I ever graduate!

what are you doing right now?

[drew]

just hanging around

being shitty crazy

[recursivelyenumerable]

well I already love Marx, at least as a sociologist and philosopher (rather than as an economist or a mathematician  ), but I have trouble writing papers about big subjects like world politics or social theory, as I never feel confident enough in my opinions to want to sign off on them.

fm: i'm working as a programmer.  which I should be doing right now rather than posting here, bye!

[Don Flamenco]

well I already love Marx, at least as a sociologist and philosopher (rather than as an economist or a mathematician  ), but I have trouble writing papers about big subjects like world politics or social theory, as I never feel confident enough in my opinions to want to sign off on them.

same here (on both points.)  The papers got easier to write, but I'm the type of person for whom learning only raises more questions, so I never really became more confident in my opinions.

[lordmaji]

this thread sucks.

me: yeah.
everyone else: yeah.

[Joe Molotov]

[9: 45: 38 pm]girl: sure, but internet is a pretty lame fill in for real human interaction

[9: 46: 18 pm]me: yeah

spoiler (click to show/hide)

:'(

[close]

[Madrun Badrun]

you said that to her?  SMH.  I would have only ever said that to a ham beast!

spoiler (click to show/hide)

Do you find beautiful women more comforting too?  :'(

[close]

[Van Cruncheon]

personally, i liked the exchange. way to bring the fake bitch down.

[recursivelyenumerable]

to be clear since this is threatening to involve someone other than myself who never consented to be involved, the pic posted by mojo is not of the woman of the chat log, who is someone I find appealing, from my limited knowledge of and contact with her, and have nothing against.  I thought it was ok to post this excerpt because she doesn't say much in it and there's nothing that reflects much on her one way or the other; not sure where Prole is coming from here.

[Barry Egan]

he's trying to reinforce your neurotic behavior (for lulz)

[OptimoPeach]

to be clear since this is threatening to involve someone other than myself who never consented to be involved, the pic posted by mojo is not of the woman of the chat log

In that case, there's some nudes on that photobucket. Ass and titties, no vagina :'(

[Madrun Badrun]

 

[fistfulofmetal]

nice boobs

[Madrun Badrun]

someone really needs to leave some comments on these pics.    Maybe tell her how to set her photo to private. 

[fistfulofmetal]

i like how there are images deleted for violating their TOS

then boobs and ass on either side.

[BlackMage]

This thread gets double points for not only indirectly providing me with nudes but nudes of a girl who probably doesn't want me looking at them, which makes it even more hot.

[Madrun Badrun]

This thread gets double points for not only indirectly providing me with nudes but nudes of a girl who probably doesn't want me looking at them, which makes it even more hot.

Does it ever. 

[fistfulofmetal]

that isnt the girl he talked to.

[CurseoftheGods]

just hanging around

being shitty crazy

[recursivelyenumerable]

how am I the wrong person?  who says I don't deserve to suffer?

[Brehvolution]

Oh my.

Thank you.

[Barry Egan]

how am I the wrong person?  who says I don't deserve to suffer?

This strain of thought is quite specifically why psychoanalysis exists. 

[muckhole]

I love how even with the internet at my disposal, the second someone chimes in with "There's nudes," I'm rushing to see them like I've never seen a naked woman before.

[Madrun Badrun]

 

[Joe Molotov]

I love how even with the internet at my disposal, the second someone chimes in with "There's nudes," I'm rushing to see them like I've never seen a naked woman before.

BlackMage already explained the rationale.