Author Topic: Steve Jobs confirms long-rumored AIDS speculation; Apple to shut down in 2009 (Read 4381 times)

TVC15 · « **on:** December 17, 2008, 03:34:24 AM »

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20081216/ap_on_hi_te/tec_apple_jobs

Can't say I'm surprised. The Woz always seemed like the smarter of the two for getting out of the high STD-risk world of hardware development. Plus he's kinda a hot bear and Jobs always looked fairly thin and Rent-like. Oh well, I guess Apple deserves some mourning. They got lucky a few times.

castle007 · « **Reply #1 on:** December 17, 2008, 03:39:46 AM »

the article had nothing to do with what you said

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #2 on:** December 17, 2008, 03:40:06 AM »

Apple

that being said I hope nothing's wrong with him. Was there even an explanation for him looking all Ethiopian that one time?

duckman2000 · « **Reply #3 on:** December 17, 2008, 03:40:44 AM »

All the fucking cocaine all the time will do that to a man

Or hey, cancer.

Van Cruncheon · « **Reply #4 on:** December 17, 2008, 03:50:27 AM »

Quote from: Thanks But No Thanks on December 17, 2008, 03:40:06 AM

Apple

that being said I hope nothing's wrong with him. Was there even an explanation for him looking all Ethiopian that one time?

lrn2read

spoiler (click to show/hide)

pancreatic cancer

[close]

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #5 on:** December 17, 2008, 03:55:44 AM »

why read when you're my letter bitch

sucks about the cancer though $:-\$

TVC15 · « **Reply #6 on:** December 17, 2008, 03:57:43 AM »

He will always be remembered for bringing Unix to the filthy heterosexual masses.

brawndolicious · « **Reply #7 on:** December 17, 2008, 05:02:10 AM »

I'm guessing that most likely there's nothing wrong with him but the stock price will take a dive again.

ToxicAdam · « **Reply #8 on:** December 17, 2008, 06:56:00 AM »

Must be a heavy cell phone user.

Bocsius · « **Reply #9 on:** December 17, 2008, 09:05:59 AM »

Quote from: castle007 on December 17, 2008, 03:39:46 AM

the article had nothing to do with what you said

You must learn to read between the lines.

I hope my iPod still works after next year.

Kestastrophe · « **Reply #10 on:** December 17, 2008, 09:14:21 AM »

Did Kosma have sex with Steve Jobs?

patrickula · « **Reply #11 on:** December 17, 2008, 09:19:00 AM »

"Schiller" is a hilarious name for a marketing exec. Perfect

Tauntaun · « **Reply #12 on:** December 17, 2008, 09:23:10 AM »

Quote from: Kestastrophe on December 17, 2008, 09:14:21 AM

Did Kosma have sex with Steve Jobs?

That's how you get rid of AIDS if you get it, you shoot it into someone who doesn't have it and then you're cured.

border · « **Reply #13 on:** December 17, 2008, 11:22:30 AM »

I don't think anything is wrong with Jobs.

If you read other articles, this seems to be more about Apple having a very poor relationship with the people that run the show (IDG).

Plus they also want to switch away from having Steve Jobs as their sole figurehead, since their stock plummets everytime he's rumored to have the flu. So I presume they will have different people announce products, and start throwing their own press events whenever they need to announce something.

Lucretius · « **Reply #14 on:** December 17, 2008, 04:55:10 PM »

Guess they'll have to take back all those ads about Apple being immune from getting viruses.

G The Resurrected · « **Reply #15 on:** December 17, 2008, 05:05:40 PM »

I can tell you the internal emails floating around seem to point in a structural shift so that Job's can retire. His health has been affecting him, but its nothing too serious just age. Roxanne's brother works over there and he say's they will be changing the outward appearance of the company to the public and media in the coming year as a part of re-energizing the apple family of products.

Rman · « **Reply #16 on:** December 17, 2008, 05:14:57 PM »

I hope he gets better. He's a grade A asshole, though. Think of the worst boss you ever had and magnify that times ten to get an idea about working with Steve Jobs.

TakingBackSunday · « **Reply #17 on:** December 17, 2008, 05:18:53 PM »

Wait, working for Steve Jobs sucks?

HyperZoneWasAwesome · « **Reply #18 on:** December 17, 2008, 05:22:04 PM »

92$ a share!
fuck, why the hell didn't I buy stock in the mid-90's. I could have made almost enough to buy full featured, top of the line Apple computer today.

G The Resurrected · « **Reply #19 on:** December 17, 2008, 05:23:22 PM »

Quote from: BrandNew on December 17, 2008, 05:18:53 PM

Wait, working for Steve Jobs sucks?

Yes its like working for Ceaser but he doesn't throw you into a pit of lions. deadlines deadlines deadlines that's all I hear. I drive by apple every day and you'd never get that from the outside but things are much different on the inside. Whole teams that don't meet expectations magically vanish. I have a theory they take them to Skywalker ranch where the Rancor is.

Seriously its not that bad but very stressful he's a very intense person.

Rman · « **Reply #20 on:** December 17, 2008, 05:24:52 PM »

Quote from: BrandNew on December 17, 2008, 05:18:53 PM

Wait, working for Steve Jobs sucks?

He very demanding and exacting in his standards. Every minor detail must be approved by him as well. Virtuoso's are notorious managers. So people like that, some can't handle it.

littlemathletics · « **Reply #21 on:** December 17, 2008, 05:27:50 PM »

Definitely makes sense for them to bring in a few more people as public faces. I can't think of anyone else even involved with Apple by name.

TakingBackSunday · « **Reply #22 on:** December 17, 2008, 05:28:07 PM »

Eh. I mean he is a CEO of a company expected of greatness

G The Resurrected · « **Reply #23 on:** December 17, 2008, 05:30:42 PM »

They should hire the shamwow/slapshop dude as the face of Apple him and Orange Glo/Oxy Clean would fucking own the earth with advertising.

Also that british dude with the steamer vacum thingamajig

Draft · « **Reply #24 on:** December 17, 2008, 05:31:46 PM »

Finally, the end of Apple.

The whole thing was cute for a while, but once they started with the whole iPod thing, just forget about it. Insufferable.

TVC15 · « **Reply #25 on:** December 17, 2008, 05:35:13 PM »

I wonder what he has done to prepare Apple for what happens when he leaves the company. The post-Steve Apple in the 80s and 90s was absolutely abysmal. The machines Apple was releasing in the 90s, before Steve's return, were just embarrassing. Steve Apple vs. non-Steve Apple is like PS2-era Sony vs. PS3-era Sony. They just completely lost the score.

littlemathletics · « **Reply #26 on:** December 17, 2008, 06:10:27 PM »

Well, they were licensing out the hardware and OS for a while there. Remember clone Macs?

TVC15 · « **Reply #27 on:** December 17, 2008, 06:13:21 PM »

Yeah, but every OS they made between the OG Mac OS and OSX was basically unusable. Being a Mac fan in the 90s had to be rather depressing.

littlemathletics · « **Reply #28 on:** December 17, 2008, 06:37:05 PM »

7.5 was awesome. :'(

Don Flamenco · « **Reply #29 on:** December 18, 2008, 10:03:08 AM »

Steve Jobs has died. Long live Steve Jobs!

yeah, that Wired article about him a few months ago was pretty interesting--it makes sense though. They don't give off a "google" vibe. My macbook is like "this shit is serious anal retentive business." Which is why I like it, of course.

T234 · « **Reply #30 on:** December 18, 2008, 10:52:59 AM »

lol macfags

chronovore · « **Reply #31 on:** December 19, 2008, 07:10:33 AM »

Did anyone actually read the article other than the two people who said "WTF?"

CajoleJuice · « **Reply #32 on:** January 14, 2009, 05:09:09 PM »

yeah, there's no way he does that unless he's dying

apple had a nice run

TVC15 · « **Reply #33 on:** January 14, 2009, 06:12:26 PM »

BIRTHDAY MAGICK!

Joe Molotov · « **Reply #34 on:** January 14, 2009, 06:21:10 PM »

Quote from: Genghis Cohen on January 14, 2009, 05:02:00 PM

He just stepped down, AIDS confirmed

Definitely full blown AIDS.

E-DuB · « **Reply #35 on:** January 14, 2009, 08:02:51 PM »

Quote from: TVC 15 on December 17, 2008, 03:57:43 AM

He will always be remembered for bringing Unix to the filthy heterosexual masses.

Jobs news $:-\$

Using UNIX in elementary school

The Fake Shemp · « **Reply #36 on:** January 14, 2009, 08:21:00 PM »

Linux am AIDS contagious?

The Fake Shemp · « **Reply #37 on:** January 14, 2009, 08:26:37 PM »

Dude, the Woz is in an insane asylum.

chronovore · « **Reply #38 on:** January 16, 2009, 04:33:48 AM »

"On July 11, 2008, Wozniak showed up at the Apple Store at the Valley Fair Mall in San Jose, California, offering doughnuts to customers waiting to purchase Apple's new iPhone 3G. He is considered by Apple fans to be very friendly."

Anyone else think this reads like a monster description from an AD&D manual?

Tabasco · « **Reply #39 on:** January 16, 2009, 06:57:50 AM »

woz is really in the nut house? for what?

Vyer · « **Reply #40 on:** January 17, 2009, 12:12:26 AM »

Quote from: G The Resurrected on December 17, 2008, 05:23:22 PM

Quote from: BrandNew on December 17, 2008, 05:18:53 PM
Wait, working for Steve Jobs sucks?

Yes its like working for Ceaser but he doesn't throw you into a pit of lions. deadlines deadlines deadlines that's all I hear. I drive by apple every day and you'd never get that from the outside but things are much different on the inside. Whole teams that don't meet expectations magically vanish. I have a theory they take them to Skywalker ranch where the Rancor is.

Seriously its not that bad but very stressful he's a very intense person.

Supposedly they got some nice perks, too though. Friend of mine worked as a genius for Apple retail, they sent him (paid for everything) to Cali to train for two weeks at corporate in Cupertino.

He said the HQ is like a college campus. Big, open lawn in the center where people play football and shit after work. And one of the Fridays he was there they had a 'beer bash' in their cafe, where a bunch of kegs of beer was brought in and people started showing up around 4:30 getting free beer and food and hanging out.

Apparently this beer bash happens several times a month.

TVC15 · « **Reply #41 on:** January 17, 2009, 12:45:26 AM »

Quote from: Tabasco on January 16, 2009, 06:57:50 AM

woz is really in the nut house? for what?

He's not.

Human Snorenado · « **Reply #42 on:** January 17, 2009, 12:50:30 AM »

Quote from: Tabasco on January 16, 2009, 06:57:50 AM

woz is really in the nut house? for what?

Willingly dating Kathy Griffin. It was for his own good, really.

chronovore · « **Reply #43 on:** January 18, 2009, 08:33:52 PM »

Yeah, and they had The Steve's favorite sushi chef working in the cafeteria for a long while, though I heard he has since quit. They have nice coffee shops there, and in the lobby as well. The campus is pretty sweet.

TVC15 · « **Reply #44 on:** January 21, 2009, 06:03:02 PM »

http://business.timesonline.co.uk/tol/business/industry_sectors/technology/article5563131.ece

Quote

America’s top securities regulator is understood to be investigating Apple’s recent disclosures about the health problems of Steve Jobs, its chief executive.

lol

Joe Molotov · « **Reply #45 on:** January 21, 2009, 07:18:12 PM »

Apparently the SEC requested a list of his recent sexual partners, and Kosma's name came up. Doesn't look good.

News:

Author Topic: Steve Jobs confirms long-rumored AIDS speculation; Apple to shut down in 2009 (Read 4381 times)