Author Topic: I'll never survive in the city (Read 1449 times)

Tristam · « **on:** February 07, 2009, 10:34:20 PM »

Thirty minutes ago I went to go pick up a new side mirror at our local Autozone and in the parking lot some middle-aged guy approached me and said he had two little girls and he was in a bind (he also said he had diabetes and he did have a bad cough). I gave him $20 and drove him where he said he needed to go.

drozmight · « **Reply #1 on:** February 07, 2009, 10:36:01 PM »

lol, dumb ass.

Madrun Badrun · « **Reply #2 on:** February 07, 2009, 10:40:14 PM »

One a scale of one to ten, with one being the lowest and ten the highest, how was the blowjob?

Brehvolution · « **Reply #3 on:** February 07, 2009, 11:22:19 PM »

That is very generous of you.

Karma has a way of making things right. And you just gained some good karma.

In essence, you gave a bottle of purified water to a needy wastelander.

Madrun Badrun · « **Reply #4 on:** February 07, 2009, 11:24:34 PM »

Zero is right. This means now you can do some strictly business shit.

drew · « **Reply #5 on:** February 08, 2009, 12:45:48 AM »

tell those people to fuck off

you got played to fuck, your lucky youve still got ur life/wallet

drew · « **Reply #6 on:** February 08, 2009, 12:47:28 AM »

WHENEVER someone approaches you in a parking lot THEY ARE NOT TELLING THE TRUTH

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #7 on:** February 08, 2009, 12:47:50 AM »

listen to stevie wonder, don't run any packages across the street for anybody

Greatness Gone · « **Reply #8 on:** February 08, 2009, 12:54:46 AM »

One day you'll pick up a psycho who's going to make you into a fucking toilet lid cover.

drew · « **Reply #9 on:** February 08, 2009, 12:55:44 AM »

anime avatar etc etc

recursivelyenumerable · « **Reply #10 on:** February 08, 2009, 01:02:36 AM »

i give money to homeless people on the street etc. occasionally. i figure they might often be bullshitting, but i've actually been in the situation (purely through poor logistical planning) of being stranded out at night far from home and not having any money to get home or buy food etc., so ...

Madrun Badrun · « **Reply #11 on:** February 08, 2009, 01:12:35 AM »

recursive when you were a street bum did play your clarinet on the corner, case open, to get by?

recursivelyenumerable · « **Reply #12 on:** February 08, 2009, 01:15:03 AM »

i really regret not taking a picture when my tooth had two giant cracks

it was pretty hardcore looking.

Positive Touch · « **Reply #13 on:** February 08, 2009, 11:36:41 AM »

"sorry, I don't carry cash"

works every time

Diunx · « **Reply #14 on:** February 08, 2009, 02:26:11 PM »

The last time I gave money to a homeless man he told me that he needed it to buy rum, I have always appreciated honesty.

recursivelyenumerable · « **Reply #15 on:** February 08, 2009, 02:47:55 PM »

my main difficulty with giving money to homeless people is that I start feeling guilty about playing favorites. I have to keep track of how much I've given to white people lately, how much to black people, how much to women and men, young, old to make sure I'm distributing it equitably and impartially and not just according to my personal tastes and prejudices.

Ecrofirt · « **Reply #16 on:** February 08, 2009, 03:27:46 PM »

Quote from: recursivelyenumerable on February 08, 2009, 02:47:55 PM

my main difficulty with giving money to homeless people is that I start feeling guilty about playing favorites. I have to keep track of how much I've given to white people lately, how much to black people, how much to women and men, young, old to make sure I'm distributing it equitably and impartially and not just according to my personal tastes and prejudices.

Just so long as you NEVER give money to a Spaniard.

ch1nchilla · « **Reply #17 on:** February 08, 2009, 05:47:55 PM »

Although that was nice, probably not a really good idea to make a habit out of such things.

Oblivion · « **Reply #18 on:** February 09, 2009, 04:07:46 PM »

Who the fuck helps people?

demi · « **Reply #19 on:** February 09, 2009, 05:44:12 PM »

Quote from: Oblivion on February 09, 2009, 04:07:46 PM

Who the fuck helps people?

I do. Remember when I gave you money? Did you forget that, you fucking cocksucker? Fuck you. You know what, don't bother. Banned.

demi · « **Reply #20 on:** February 09, 2009, 06:02:27 PM »

They are pretty good, too. But I don't want to share after Oblivion's comment. Fucking infuriating... who says that? Fuck, man.

Oblivion · « **Reply #21 on:** February 09, 2009, 06:09:12 PM »

Quote from: demi on February 09, 2009, 05:44:12 PM

Quote from: Oblivion on February 09, 2009, 04:07:46 PM
Who the fuck helps people?

I do. Remember when I gave you money? Did you forget that, you fucking cocksucker? Fuck you. You know what, don't bother. Banned.

You're so nice, demi.

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #22 on:** February 09, 2009, 07:46:22 PM »

I'd give money to older poor people or poor women in general. young poor people need to get a job

muckhole · « **Reply #23 on:** February 10, 2009, 01:06:48 AM »

Quote from: Phoenix Dark on February 09, 2009, 07:46:22 PM

I'd give money to older poor people or poor women in general. young poor people need to get a job

Pretty much this. The amount of university students who spend their spare time out panhandling in my area is disgusting, only to see a minivan swing by and pick them up to take them home.

EmCeeGrammar · « **Reply #24 on:** February 10, 2009, 04:44:58 AM »

I've been duped three times. First was some old fart who stopped me at a gas station close to my old job saying he had no money and needed 20 bucks. Fastforward two months later and he stops me to do the same routine again at the exact same gas station. I stare at him for five seconds and like the ballless dumbass I am gave him the money again. You know what, the other stories just highlight just how hopelessy clueless and gullible I am so I don't think I'll share those.

demi · « **Reply #25 on:** February 10, 2009, 04:48:53 AM »

Nintendo walks up, offers you a completely new system for $250... you know how it goes

Tristam · « **Reply #26 on:** February 10, 2009, 05:45:48 AM »

Quote from: Green Man on February 09, 2009, 05:52:18 PM

Quote from: Positive Touch on February 08, 2009, 11:36:41 AM
"sorry, I don't carry cash"

works every time

"Well, there's an ATM right over there"

bums don't fuck around anymore.

I didn't have any cash so I did run by an ATM.

News:

Author Topic: I'll never survive in the city (Read 1449 times)