Bore to the Future: so you have a time machine....

[dcharlie]

... a job at a leading globally recognised and respected newspaper
... a PC
... a copy of Photoshop
... a sense of mischief

Pick a time, hit 88mph, and tell me : how would you fuck with peoples heads?

[Eric P]

older jfk (greying hair, goatee) clearly shooting from the grassy knoll.

[Flannel Boy]

Hitler in a bathtub with Stalin.

[Madrun Badrun]

Hitler and Stalin in a bath tub shaving Malek's neckbeard. 

[Eric P]

jesse owens losing

[Smooth Groove]

A black man becomes the president of United States.

[Flannel Boy]

Napalm Girl running away from Woody Allen.

[Madrun Badrun]

 

[Phoenix Dark]

Napalm Girl running away from Woody Allen.

fuck 

[Human Snorenado]

Probably take a statue of All Around Great American and Herpes Sufferer Chipper Jones to that Mayan city they just discovered and leave it there like a day before the explorers make it.

[Flannel Boy]

Truman, with blood dripping down his mouth, holding up a newspaper that says "Truman Eats President-Elect Dewey."

edit: I'm 90% sure that I stole that from The Simpsons.

[Human Snorenado]

Ooh, ooh, I'd drug Milton Friedman, Ayn Rand and Alan Greenspan and then have them found in a bed with a bunch of butchered underage boy prostitutes and copies of the Communist Manifesto and the Little Red Book.

[Flannel Boy]

The Kinks arriving at Kennedy International Airport in early 1964 to tens of thousands of screaming fans.

 

[Madrun Badrun]

The Beatles, all lined up facing the camera with giant smiles on their face, bent over and being sodomized by black men. 

[Dickie Dee]

The Beatles, all lined up facing the camera with giant smiles on their face, bent over and being sodomized by black men. 

Edited for the '60s

[Flannel Boy]

The Beatles, all lined up facing the camera with giant smiles on their face, bent over and being sodomized by black men. 

(Image removed from quote.)

Edited for the '60s

That experience radically changed them. This is what they looked like just five minutes later:

[Madrun Badrun]

That experience radically changed[sic]. This is what they looked like just five minutes later:

you mean radically changed them?


You could use the extra words I though into my sentences. 

[Don Flamenco]

SOME OF THE POPES ARE EVIL, I REPEAT, SOME OF THE POPES ARE EVIL

[Dickie Dee]

The Beatles, all lined up facing the camera with giant smiles on their face, bent over and being sodomized by black men. 

[img]http://www.norwegianwood.org/beatles/disko/ep/ep3.jpg[img]

Edited for the '60s

That experience radically changed them. This is what they looked like just five minutes later:







[img]http://www.jpgr.co.uk/pcsp718_a.jpg[img]

I tried so hard to find those covers instead but for some reason google was failing me. I wanted to make a really lame "Once you go black..." joke  

[Diunx]

To the 70's smoke tons of weed, drink a bunch of acid and take my own picture, then I would come back to the present and let the picture in a place where some of my journalist friends can find it, then I would confess that I'm an immortal and sell the secret of immortality for millions of dollars a head.

[Don Flamenco]

I'd go back to the late-ish 1800s with a bad fever, get everyone sick as fuck, wait till people start dying, then offer them bottles of tylenol for a million a pop.  Then I'd take that vintage U.S. money and sell it for even more money.

[Human Snorenado]

I'd take a machine gun and a bunch of ammo back to the crusades and fuck them sand negras up somethin fierce.

[Joe Molotov]

Russia's already put Gundams on the Moon, we need to pour all our research dollars into GN particle research.

[Bloodwake]

I'd go back and start Facebook or Myspace in 1995

I'd then use Photoshop to make George W. Bush look distinguished mentally-challenged, also in 1995, fucking his chances at the presidency.

[Tauntaun]

I'd meet all of you as kids and expose myself to you all and as I leave and you're crying I'd say REMEMBER THE TAUNTAUN!   

[tehjaybo]

I'd say I would go into the past and warn myself about everything that would happen to me (lol I know, seeing yourself, whole world implodes what the hell ever)  That way, I'd be much better off now, as I could avoid the women that suck, and talk to the women that are good, and actually ask out the chicks that had crushes on me that I never knew about until way too late.

Also, the fourth chance with the right girl where everything would have gone right would be the first chance and I wouldn't mess things up.  Perfect.

Oh yeah and make a lot of money, develop something, kill something, have sex with Tauntaun, whatever generic EB answer.

[Reb]

It's about photoshopping a picture to fuck with people. Pay attention!

[tehjaybo]

Oh.  Well, in that case. 

I'd go back and make all the bible drawings of Jesus have lightsabers, and somehow have it written in that he was a Jedi.  The Jedi religion would be born.  And we'd have developed lightsabers by now. 

[Bloodwake]

I'd say I would go into the past and warn myself about everything that would happen to me (lol I know, seeing yourself, whole world implodes what the hell ever)  That way, I'd be much better off now, as I could avoid the women that suck, and talk to the women that are good, and actually ask out the chicks that had crushes on me that I never knew about until way too late.

Also, the fourth chance with the right girl where everything would have gone right would be the first chance and I wouldn't mess things up.  Perfect.

Oh yeah and make a lot of money, develop something, kill something, have sex with Tauntaun, whatever generic EB answer.

You have much to learn, young Padowan.

That bolded sentence should have just been

spoiler (click to show/hide)

[close]

[tehjaybo]

Padowan.

[Bloodwake]

Padowan.

 

[tehjaybo]

Padowan.

 

More like pedowang.

spoiler (click to show/hide)

Or "Padawan", smh Kentucky schools

[close]

[ferrarimanf355]

I'd take a baseball bat to the head of the moron who thought that the One More Day storyline for Spider-Man was a good idea, and try to ensure that it doesn't happen. You don't retcon decades of history like that!