Author Topic: Your wallet is a piece of shit .. (Read 4068 times)

ToxicAdam · « **on:** April 11, 2009, 03:05:36 AM »

Behold, philistines and cavemen .... the greatest man's wallet in the history of wallet-dom.

Take your trifold, 8 picture carrying ass-breaker and throw it away. Take your lame bifold with outer money clip and put it into the shredder. This sleek fucking bad-ass carries your essentials and makes your cash easily accessible so you are not fumbling for your greasy dollars in dark strip clubs.

Diunx · « **Reply #1 on:** April 11, 2009, 03:17:12 AM »

Fuck you! my wallet is awesome!

ToxicAdam · « **Reply #2 on:** April 11, 2009, 03:18:18 AM »

http://www.overstock.com/Clothing-Shoes/Royce-Leather-Money-Clip-Wallet/3023910/product.html

Madrun Badrun · « **Reply #3 on:** April 11, 2009, 03:37:27 AM »

Where do you put your toonies though?

Kara · « **Reply #4 on:** April 11, 2009, 04:17:36 AM »

Mine's sleeker.

spoiler (click to show/hide)

Because it never has any money in it. :'(

[close]

On the plus side when people ask me for ID I get to flash it like it's a badge. Feeling official > being official.

Dickie Dee · « **Reply #5 on:** April 11, 2009, 05:09:16 AM »

I don't see any Velcro

spoiler (click to show/hide)

Note: My "sporty" wallet actually has velcro

[close]

Veidt · « **Reply #6 on:** April 11, 2009, 07:22:50 AM »

Well, guess what? I don't have a wallet!
So, good day to you sir!

Reb · « **Reply #7 on:** April 11, 2009, 07:49:08 AM »

Quote from: Kosma on April 11, 2009, 07:39:02 AM

Quote from: Green Man on April 11, 2009, 05:37:16 AM
People still use wallets? I use rubber bands like a real G.

How does that look?

Awesome.

cloudwalking · « **Reply #8 on:** April 11, 2009, 07:54:49 AM »

the rubber band only looks cool if you're carrying a huge wad of money like in the above pic. otherwise, you look like a poser.

personally, i keep my money in my bra

Positive Touch · « **Reply #9 on:** April 11, 2009, 09:39:13 AM »

Quote from: cloudwalking on April 11, 2009, 07:54:49 AM

personally, i keep my money in my bra

$:-\$ money is dirty

Eric P · « **Reply #10 on:** April 11, 2009, 10:05:49 AM »

i dunno. my wallet's pretty ace

http://www.momastore.org/museum/moma/ProductDisplay_Art%20Lover%20Wallet_10451_10001_52205_-1_11536_11633_null_shop_

The Fake Shemp · « **Reply #11 on:** April 11, 2009, 10:07:48 AM »

Quote from: cloudwalking on April 11, 2009, 07:54:49 AM

personally, i keep my money in my bra

That is pretty gross. $:-\$

cloudwalking · « **Reply #12 on:** April 11, 2009, 10:19:08 AM »

wait you guys actually believed me? i worked at coach for crying out loud, my money only touches the inside of the finest coach wallet/wristlet.

and this bag:

my shit is worth more than the money i carry it in most of the time. that's better than any rubber band!

Veidt · « **Reply #13 on:** April 11, 2009, 10:27:03 AM »

Now that I know you have a lot of money. I hate you even more.

: (

Cheebs · « **Reply #14 on:** April 11, 2009, 11:45:51 AM »

my wallet is a mess, I am terrible about organizing it and just crumple everything in it in a big mess. And I have way too many fucking cards in it to keep track of.

The Fake Shemp · « **Reply #15 on:** April 11, 2009, 11:53:38 AM »

I've always wanted this wallet:

siamesedreamer · « **Reply #16 on:** April 11, 2009, 01:05:30 PM »

People still use cash?

fistfulofmetal · « **Reply #17 on:** April 11, 2009, 01:07:56 PM »

My wallet has the Foxhound logo on it

Cheebs · « **Reply #18 on:** April 11, 2009, 01:17:52 PM »

Quote from: fistfulofmetal on April 11, 2009, 01:07:56 PM

My wallet has the Foxhound logo on it

why

cool breeze · « **Reply #19 on:** April 11, 2009, 01:18:29 PM »

I've been using the same wallet for over 9 years now. I need a new one and the only thing I need different is a front card pocket that lets the card be visible and maybe put a small button on one of the pockets for storing quarters.

muckhole · « **Reply #20 on:** April 11, 2009, 01:19:36 PM »

I have a massive Costanza-esque brick of a wallet, but that's largely due to keeping every gift card and ATM receipt I ever get in there.

The best part of it is the little change pocket where I can keep my guitar picks and a spare key.

demi · « **Reply #21 on:** April 11, 2009, 01:21:08 PM »

Do you keep any rubbers in it too

Veidt · « **Reply #22 on:** April 11, 2009, 01:21:48 PM »

Quote from: siamesedreamer on April 11, 2009, 01:05:30 PM

People still use cash?

Yes.

muckhole · « **Reply #23 on:** April 11, 2009, 01:28:02 PM »

Quote from: demi on April 11, 2009, 01:21:08 PM

Do you keep any rubbers in it too

No. No room! I need to buy a condom wallet.

Human Snorenado · « **Reply #24 on:** April 11, 2009, 01:42:17 PM »

I've always wanted to be so rich that I could pay a midget to follow me around and hold my monies.

Himu · « **Reply #25 on:** April 11, 2009, 02:05:44 PM »

honestly, I don't even put my cash in my wallet. Never have. If someone steals your wallet, your cash is gone and that's usually the main reason they go for your wallet in the first place. I put my cash in my pocket.

Dickie Dee · « **Reply #26 on:** April 11, 2009, 02:06:50 PM »

Quote from: The Card Cheat on April 11, 2009, 01:42:17 PM

I've always wanted to be so rich that I could pay a midget to follow me around and hold my monies.

with a nacho hat w/ dip, damn this economy

Veidt · « **Reply #27 on:** April 11, 2009, 02:07:07 PM »

@Himu
that's right.

bud · « **Reply #28 on:** April 11, 2009, 02:11:20 PM »

Quote from: Himuro on April 11, 2009, 02:05:44 PM

honestly, I don't even put my cash in my wallet. Never have. If someone steals your wallet, your cash is gone and that's usually the main reason they go for your wallet in the first place. I put my cash in my pocket.

mah nig

i just use my own pockets for cards/papers/money/whatever

Himu · « **Reply #29 on:** April 11, 2009, 02:13:12 PM »

only white people put their cash in their wallet. They do that shit so they can show how powerful they are. Flip out that wallet, pull of dem bills and show everyone in town they're rich as shit and that they DARE that negro or lil mexican kid who's earning 6 dollars an hour to steal their wallet.

oh, and girls. But they have an excuse, because they're girls.

Diunx · « **Reply #30 on:** April 11, 2009, 02:16:17 PM »

Quote from: fistfulofmetal on April 11, 2009, 01:07:56 PM

My wallet has the Foxhound logo on it

Fucking awesome!

MCD · « **Reply #31 on:** April 11, 2009, 02:18:20 PM »

my wallet has naruto on it.

am i awesome? i know i am.

Himu · « **Reply #32 on:** April 11, 2009, 02:19:07 PM »

My wallet has camo all over it.

Smooth Groove · « **Reply #33 on:** April 11, 2009, 02:20:03 PM »

Quote from: Himuro on April 11, 2009, 02:13:12 PM

only white people put their cash in their wallet. They do that shit so they can show how powerful they are. Flip out that wallet, pull of dem bills and show everyone in town they're rich as shit and that they DARE that negro or lil mexican kid who's earning 6 dollars an hour to steal their wallet.

oh, and girls. But they have an excuse, because they're girls.

So what do black people do? Sell a gold chain whenever money is needed?

Himu · « **Reply #34 on:** April 11, 2009, 02:24:17 PM »

I just put a roll according to number.

100 first, then 20's, 10's, 5's and 1's. That way, if I'm going to deduce from the pile I can get what I want easy without being a big show off.

Then I stuff it in my pocket deep so that if someone puts their hand in my pocket (trying to feel my dick or something) I'll be able to snatch their hand with some kung fu.

Veidt · « **Reply #35 on:** April 11, 2009, 02:25:50 PM »

Quote from: Smooth Groove on April 11, 2009, 02:20:03 PM

Quote from: Himuro on April 11, 2009, 02:13:12 PM
only white people put their cash in their wallet. They do that shit so they can show how powerful they are. Flip out that wallet, pull of dem bills and show everyone in town they're rich as shit and that they DARE that negro or lil mexican kid who's earning 6 dollars an hour to steal their wallet.

oh, and girls. But they have an excuse, because they're girls.

So what do black people do? Sell a gold chain whenever money is needed?

I think you accidentally spelled "Steal" like "sell".

That's right, we steal shit.

bud · « **Reply #36 on:** April 11, 2009, 02:26:20 PM »

himu, how big is your dick?

latest measurements put mine at ±6.48'', it gets slightly bigger when it's warmer

summer's pretty much here, so that's even better

Himu · « **Reply #37 on:** April 11, 2009, 02:26:28 PM »

That's right fellas. Evilbore's black clique has another member.

Human Snorenado · « **Reply #38 on:** April 11, 2009, 02:27:02 PM »

See, all of this planning and fear is moot with a midget. No one is gonna fuck with your midget-wallet, because everyone knows that all midgets eat the flesh of men. All you'd have to do is provide your midget-wallet with a regular supply of victims.

Himu · « **Reply #39 on:** April 11, 2009, 02:28:25 PM »

Where can you get one of these midget wallet?

bud · « **Reply #40 on:** April 11, 2009, 02:30:18 PM »

Quote from: The Card Cheat on April 11, 2009, 02:27:02 PM

See, all of this planning and fear is moot with a midget. No one is gonna fuck with your midget-wallet, because everyone knows that all midgets eat the flesh of men. All you'd have to do is provide your midget-wallet with a regular supply of victims.

why are you always so angry?

Human Snorenado · « **Reply #41 on:** April 11, 2009, 02:30:43 PM »

Quote from: Himuro on April 11, 2009, 02:28:25 PM

Where can you get one of these midget wallet?

You have to convince a flesh eating midget (there's no other kind, honestly) of your sincerity. Good luck with that, they're all savages.

Bud- who the hell is angry? I'm talking about flesh eating midgets here. This is deadly serious stuff.

Himu · « **Reply #42 on:** April 11, 2009, 02:31:07 PM »

Quote from: bud on April 11, 2009, 02:26:20 PM

himu, how big is your dick?

latest measurements put mine at ±6.48'', it gets slightly bigger when it's warmer

summer's pretty much here, so that's even better

It depends. If I'm really horny it can get to ~8ish. You know how when if you abstain from spilling your seed your dick gets like, way bigger than it usually is?

bud · « **Reply #43 on:** April 11, 2009, 02:37:50 PM »

one thing i notice a lot about black guys in porn is that their head is pink is fuck

it looks so weird lol

is yours like that?

Madrun Badrun · « **Reply #44 on:** April 11, 2009, 02:39:03 PM »

Quote from: MCD on April 11, 2009, 02:18:20 PM

my wallet has naruto on it.

am i awesome? i know i am.

Yes you are. Is a shirtless saskue on the back?

Himu · « **Reply #45 on:** April 11, 2009, 02:42:09 PM »

Quote from: bud on April 11, 2009, 02:37:50 PM

one thing i notice a lot about black guys in porn is that their head is pink is fuck

it looks so weird lol

is yours like that?

Not really. It's pretty damn pink at the outer edge of the head but the head itself is pretty much a slight brown with a pinkish tone.

When I get really hard it gets pinker though.

When I let the juice out I can see a bunch of tiny holes appear on the head though. Can you see that on yours?

bud · « **Reply #46 on:** April 11, 2009, 02:46:50 PM »

holes?! wtf

Veidt · « **Reply #47 on:** April 11, 2009, 02:49:00 PM »

Quote from: Himuro on April 11, 2009, 02:42:09 PM

Quote from: bud on April 11, 2009, 02:37:50 PM
one thing i notice a lot about black guys in porn is that their head is pink is fuck

it looks so weird lol

is yours like that?

Not really. It's pretty damn pink at the outer edge of the head but the head itself is pretty much a slight brown with a pinkish tone.

When I get really hard it gets pinker though.

When I let the juice out I can see a bunch of tiny holes appear on the head though. Can you see that on yours?

wtf

HOLES?

drew · « **Reply #48 on:** April 11, 2009, 02:50:31 PM »

oh god

Veidt · « **Reply #49 on:** April 11, 2009, 02:51:20 PM »

why the hell is it pink?

Mine is just brown all over baby.

Himu · « **Reply #50 on:** April 11, 2009, 02:54:49 PM »

Quote from: bud on April 11, 2009, 02:46:50 PM

holes?! wtf

I think it's just the texture of something.

Quote from: Veidt on April 11, 2009, 02:51:20 PM

why the hell is it pink?

Mine is just brown all over baby.

But you're also African.

Do you have white blood in you? I have white and cherokee indian. I think that's why it's kinda sorta pink.

MCD · « **Reply #51 on:** April 11, 2009, 03:01:07 PM »

Quote from: Father_Mike on April 11, 2009, 02:39:03 PM

Quote from: MCD on April 11, 2009, 02:18:20 PM
my wallet has naruto on it.

am i awesome? i know i am.

Yes you are. Is a shirtless saskue on the back?

10/10

WOULD RAGE AGAIN

Veidt · « **Reply #52 on:** April 11, 2009, 03:02:01 PM »

Quote from: Himuro on April 11, 2009, 02:54:49 PM

Quote from: bud on April 11, 2009, 02:46:50 PM
holes?! wtf

I think it's just the texture of something.

Quote from: Veidt on April 11, 2009, 02:51:20 PM
why the hell is it pink?

Mine is just brown all over baby.

But you're also African. Do you have white blood in you? I have white and cherokee indian. I think that's why it's kinda sorta pink.

That's weird. Because I only have 1.5% of sub saharan (black) genetics in me. All though I'm an African I have straight curly hair. People think I'm from Yemen : ( which makes me, like an alien or something.

FML.

You must be awesome Himu, except for the holes on your dick.

Diunx · « **Reply #53 on:** April 11, 2009, 03:05:33 PM »

Does the semen come out of the little holes too?

TEEEPO · « **Reply #54 on:** April 11, 2009, 03:05:45 PM »

drew · « **Reply #55 on:** April 11, 2009, 03:07:30 PM »

you are awesome

i miss not using a wallet, before i was 21 id just keep my id in my car and do whatever

Flannel Boy · « **Reply #56 on:** April 11, 2009, 03:21:49 PM »

I don't carry much cash (maybe four or five twenties) because pretty much every retailer takes bank cards or credit cards.

Using cash in Canada means getting back way too many coins. Fuck that.

drew · « **Reply #57 on:** April 11, 2009, 03:23:24 PM »

you live in canada?

it all makes sense now

Himu · « **Reply #58 on:** April 11, 2009, 03:25:05 PM »

Quote from: Veidt on April 11, 2009, 03:02:01 PM

You must be awesome Himu, except for the holes on your dick.

I was joking. It's the texture.

Flannel Boy · « **Reply #59 on:** April 11, 2009, 03:26:06 PM »

Quote from: Drewsy on April 11, 2009, 03:23:24 PM

you live in canada?

it all makes sense now

It's only come up, directly or indirectly, about 1,000 times on this forum. You'd have remembered I was Canadian if you weren't such a heavy drug user.

News:

Author Topic: Your wallet is a piece of shit .. (Read 4068 times)