HAVEN - PS2I had mentioned I picked up Haven for 3 dollars at Gamestop earlier today. It was mostly picked FOR me. I LIKED Vexx, as third-rate platforming goes it wasnt horrible. Maybe Haven was no different.
It's bad. I mean, its the kind of bad that I wish I inflicted in the bad-game challenge a month ago. I mean obviously the character deisgns are bad. They also got the voice work bad too. I mean there's this doctor guy and I have NO clue what he's saying. I just hear gibberish for 3 minutes then I hear BYE BYE which apparently is his cue to go.
So he leaves, and I leave his 'office'. Now Haven is apparently a slave. I gotta say right off that even people on welfare dont have it so good. I mean he has CLEAN clothes, a high tech yo yo, CORNROWS, some laser armband gun thing...The houses everyone lives in are taken care of and there's grass and fountains.
I mean the only indication that his people are enslaved are the guards that walk the town. They arent much of a threat tho. I can kill one of them while right next to another and he wont do anything. I could accidently run into him while trying to attack, and not even a scratch. Yet if I get to close to a barrel thats RED it might explode and KILL ME yuk yuk.
Now lets take a look at that picture above. Look at that status gauge. What the FUCK does any of that mean? Well apparently red means health, but I havent figured out what green means and the blue thing is a shield thing I think and whatever is at the center of the gauge is....jesus christ.
So I have come to the conclusion that Haven's people will NEVER escape because they are too fucking stupid. First step out of the house I see EVERY NPC in a very tight group at the center of the area. This includes guards. It is at this point they start dispersing from the center, but its a short trip as all of them turn around after about 4 yards of walking and head the opposite direction only to turn around at 4 yards.
What exactly are these slaves in charge of?
So ANYWAY im told that in order to escape through the elevator I need to gather 3 SEPERATE cogs. While exploring I found the elevator. Now im no genius, but when I see ONE cog missing from the machine, I have a real hard time figuring my need for THREE COGS. So I spend the time doing stupid 'tutorial' grade quests to get three cogs to use on the machine that by all accounts needs only one cog.
It's just frustrating to see this game in action cause its clear they didnt work on anything like AI or QUESTS THAT MAKE SENSE, but instead devoted time to make sure Haven pulls his hoodie over his precious cornrows whenever it starts raining, and takes the hoodie off when the suns out so he can parade around with his hairdo. What's worse is in order for this to be something anyone notices, it starts raining and stops raining every five fuckin seconds. Whats hilarious is in the picture below you can see that despite his best effort to keep the rows dry, he decides to just fucking jump into an ocean. GOD DAMNIT.
So the catch with Haven is that his people are ENSLAVED by a dependence on some drug. Well anyway Haven will start to run out of this drug in his system if you dick around too much. Something I learned quickly. As a result I was actually GRINDING a respawn point for this drug just so I could make the WALK to the elevator. What The Fuck.
