Now that the elitists are gone, we can reach concensue on the soon-to-be-MOTY

[Mr. Gundam]

I'm seeing this in IMAX tomorrow afternoon. I'll need to go see a couple independent/foreign/art films this weekend to bring balance back to the universe.

[tehjaybo]

Why did I do that to myself?  Please god, someone put me down.  I can't take the images in my head after that movie.  Never again.  NEVER AGAIN. WHHHYYYYYYYYYY

[The Fake Shemp]

This movie is going to be so awesome.

[EvilBoris]

 people are willing to endure the imax experience for this one? well... good luck.

 

[EmCeeGrammar]

So

-plot hole

spoiler (click to show/hide)

there are billions of billions stars but lets go through all this trouble for this one solar system

[close]

-small sample of distinguished mentally-challenged humor

spoiler (click to show/hide)

apparently small robots humping megan fox went over well in my theater, as did robot scrotum. And ghetto fab robots

[close]

-most groan inducing moment

spoiler (click to show/hide)

college slut is a ROBOT IN DISGUISE herp durp so clever

[close]

I'm sure Wilco is pleased.

[demi]

http://themoviespoiler.com/Spoilers/transformers2.html

[EmCeeGrammar]

Double posting because I must be distinguished mentally-challenged enough for seeing this.  I want to get my life together after tonight.  Willingly seeing this all but confirms I have not a fucking thing going on.

[billyofcourse]

This movie was horribad, but still gave some good laughs(most of which were unintentional).  I still can't even believe how badly michael bay raped my childhood on this one.  The first one was pretty passable as decent compared to this mess.

[EmCeeGrammar]

One of these days I want to be a man who has no problem with what other people do and like.

But I couldn't help feeling disgust at all these troglobytes laughing at dick and fart jokes.  AND THEY APPLAUDED AT THE END.  I guess I'll be a judgemental manchild for now.

[chronovore]

The premise is that Shia goes out of town to attend college, cause he's not interested in hanging out with his transforming robot friends or his girlfriend Megan Fox, right?

I mean, I know you're not meant to carp about believability in action flicks, but...

Your post reminded me of this:
[youtube=560,345]hXsd5aw8oas[/youtube]

[The Sceneman]

Im going to rent the DVD, so I dont have to watch it in a public space and have all this loud CG and shit all in my face

[Herr Mafflard]

One of these days I want to be a man who has no problem with what other people do and like.

But I couldn't help feeling disgust at all these troglobytes laughing at dick and fart jokes.  AND THEY APPLAUDED AT THE END.  I guess I'll be a judgemental manchild for now.

 

When I saw the movie, one guy tried to applaud at the end.

It was pretty funny when he stopped abrubtly because he found no one else joined in.   


This video sums up this summer for me:

[youtube=560,345]hcaNZ4iHSMw[/youtube]

 

[The Fake Shemp]

That was pretty awesome.

"And eating all of our sand."

[Great Rumbler]

One of these days I want to be a man who has no problem with what other people do and like.

But I couldn't help feeling disgust at all these troglobytes laughing at dick and fart jokes.  AND THEY APPLAUDED AT THE END.  I guess I'll be a judgemental manchild for now.

 

When I saw the movie, one guy tried to applaud at the end.

It was pretty funny when he stopped abrubtly because he found no one else joined in.   


This video sums up this summer for me:

[youtube=560,345]hcaNZ4iHSMw[/youtube]

 

It even had the clip of the T-1000 from Wayne's World! 

[Mr. Gundam]

I'm off to go experience a 2 1/2 hour lobotomy. Decided against the IMAX version, seeing how it's $15 instead of $8 for a regular matinee.

[Tauntaun]

Infected 

[Kestastrophe]

wow, that was awesome and somewhat believable

"and worst of all.........they're eating all our sand" 

[The Fake Shemp]

I would see that movie.

[recursivelyenumerable]

The premise is that Shia goes out of town to attend college, cause he's not interested in hanging out with his transforming robot friends or his girlfriend Megan Fox, right?

I mean, I know you're not meant to carp about believability in action flicks, but...

I bet I would still find a way to be miserable, even if I found myself in the situation described above.  (tbh i find the thought of spending time with megan fox very depressing, maybe because she reminds me of a girl i used to know)  I'd probably be too bogged down in inertia and malaise to leave, though.

[Robo]

So is this shittier than Spider-man 3 or just really shitty?

[EmCeeGrammar]

At least with spidey 3 you know its going to be a chick flick after tge first 2 movies.  One would think Bay would love nothing more than 2 hours of giant robots fighting, but the "human element" here runs rampant and is an embarassment.  Like I'm sure Shia is a nice guy and Megan Fox is a hottie.  But I'm going to recoil everytime they do anything else because I associate them with this movie.

And the way the portray the military is a fucking slap in the face. SMH.

[Positive Touch]

jesus christ spidey 3 and wolverine were fucking masterpieces compared to this.  i mean i really can't accurately descibe just how boring and embarassing this movie was.    the human scenes are so much worse than they are in the original.  the acting is so bad it's unreal, the soundtrack is terrible, the fight scenes are incomprehensible and god DAMN it drags on so long.  it think the hour leading up to the last fight has zero fight scenes, just tons of boring backstory and lame jokes.  the jokes, my god, the jokes.  every five minutes there was a new tiny robot with a stupid accent shitting up the screen with some of the worst attempts at humor i've ever seen in a movie. there's these two robots that embody just about every shitty stereotype of black people you can think of, and i'm sure they are going to be legendary. 

seriously i can not stress this enough: STAY AWAY.  there is nothing enjoyable in this movie AT ALL.


also there is an extreme close-up of john turturro's almost-bare ass

[Herr Mafflard]

Positive Touch

man, I can't wait to hear Willco's verdict on this.

[The Fake Shemp]

I will love it.  It will combine my love of trainwrecks and robot action.

[Diunx]

A train transformer would be pretty lame.

[Positive Touch]

I will love it.  It will combine my love of trainwrecks and robot action.

even my friend, who is gay for all things transformer, was bored shitless by this movie

[The Fake Shemp]

Yeah, I mean, this is just a bigger and dumber version of the first one.  I'm down with that.

[Mr. Gundam]

I caught a 10am screening at the new Regal 14-screeen megaplex about a 1/2 mile from my house this morning. It was horrendously bad. There wasn't a single joke that was funny, the little minibots were flat out stupid, and the racial stereotypes were awful. And can they make the Decepticons look like something other than scrap metal and clumps of random wires? But, after turning my "I only like foreign films and stuff you've never heard of nor have any interest in seeing" brain off I found enough robot fighting action to enjoy it for what it was.

I should also note that the theater was having technical problems, so the film started 30 minutes late. Then, the audio kept cutting out during the trailers and the first five minutes of the movie. The majority of the crowd got up and left, but I stuck it out. I ended up getting my $8.50 refunded as well as a free ticket that can be used on any movie, including IMAX screenings.

In summary, Transformers 2 is horrid. If you hated the first one, you'll hate this just as much, if not even more. But! I ended up getting paid in cash and a free ticket to watch GIANT ROBOTS BEAT THE EVERLIVING CRAP OUT OF EACH OTHER, and it's not like I had anything better to do this morning.

I have a couple comments about the storyline itself, but I'll spoiler them.

spoiler (click to show/hide)

1. Did I see a Decepticon Fruit Fucker in the Whitwicky's kitchen?
2. Ok, so our band of teenage heroes and ex-Section 7 guy go to the Air and Space Smithsonian in WASHINGTON D.C. to pick up Jetfire. That's fine and dandy, but when they walk outside they're in what appears to be a DESERT IN THE SOUTHWEST SURROUNDED BY MOUNTAINS. WHAT THE HELL?!?

[close]

[brawndolicious]

Is there anybody who thinks that it was better than Wolverine?  I could actually enjoy that as dumb fun.

[Mr. Gundam]

I didn't see Wolverine, so based on that fact, I think it's better.

[Positive Touch]

they were teleported into the desert

and wolverine is much better because it is half as long and doesn't feature degrading stereotypes

[Mr. Gundam]

spoiler (click to show/hide)

That's fine and dandy, but when they walk outside they're in what appears to be a DESERT IN THE SOUTHWEST SURROUNDED BY MOUNTAINS. WHAT THE HELL?!?

[close]

This was explained.

This was different than the whole Jetfire teleporting everyone to Egypt thing. Jetfire tears down the walls in the Smithsonian and walks out into a field full of military transport planes surrounded by mountains which was clearly not in D.C. Unless I dozed off, I didn't see any teleporting happening until after that.

[The Fake Shemp]

I consider Michael Bay stereotypes a plus.

[Mr. Gundam]

spoiler (click to show/hide)

That's fine and dandy, but when they walk outside they're in what appears to be a DESERT IN THE SOUTHWEST SURROUNDED BY MOUNTAINS. WHAT THE HELL?!?

[close]

This was explained.

This was different than the whole Jetfire teleporting everyone to Egypt thing. Jetfire tears down the walls in the Smithsonian and walks out into a field full of military transport planes surrounded by mountains which was clearly not in D.C. Unless I dozed off, I didn't see any teleporting happening until after that.

It was The Fallen that did that.

What? I guess I turned my brain off too much, because I just started laughing when they walked out of the Smithsonian into that field of airplanes in what was clearly not D.C.

[Van Cruncheon]

your band name needs to be a GUID

[Oblivion]

Actually, where DID the elitists go?

[The Fake Shemp]

Truck stop restrooms across the nation.

[Tucah]

Just came back from seeing it. Even with my low expectations, I was disappointed and didn't like much of the movie at all. The plot was terrible, the jokes missed much, much more than they hit and the movie was WAY too long. I thought the twins were some of the most annoying characters since Jar Jar and Sam's roommate was pretty terrible as well. As expected, the soundtrack was weak, especially that Green Day song they played like four times.I did like some of the action scenes, shit blew up nice. Tons of stereotypes too which will definitely annoy some people.

For robot action, I think I even liked T4 more than this.

[Flannel Boy]

Stupid Question: Why do people watch movies that they know will be horrible?

Just to shit on the movie afterward?
Drinking games?
Unintentional humor?
Boredom?

[Mr. Gundam]

Stupid Question: Why do people watch movies that they know will be horrible?

Just to shit on the movie afterward?
Drinking games?
Unintentional humor?
Boredom?

Because I like giant robots?

[Tucah]

I liked the first movie. I genuinely thought that while I hadn't read great things about this, I would at least enjoy it as much as I did the first. I did not.

[Flannel Boy]

Stupid Question: Why do people watch movies that they know will be horrible?

Just to shit on the movie afterward?
Drinking games?
Unintentional humor?
Boredom?

Because I like giant robots?

What is up with that? Is this some sort of sexual fetish?

[Mr. Gundam]

Nope, I just think they're cool.

[Flannel Boy]

* Malek shrugs

[chronovore]

I will love it.  It will combine my love of trainwrecks and robot action.

Just go watch Robot Jox again. At least you are assured of quality.

[ManaByte]

I would bet monies that they are going to kill Optimus in this one, with his eventual return in the third one. Because really, who wants to try and be original?

Maybe there is a script leak and someone already knows if I am right or wrong, but this is why I have that sneaking suspicion.
[youtube=560,345]U3_EXxwDpq0[/youtube]
(Image removed from quote.)

Maybe my childhood memories were asking for it, dressin that way. 

KILL STAN BUSH NOW

[ManaByte]

[youtube=560,345][/youtube]

As it SHOULD be!

[Crushed]

there's these two robots that embody just about every shitty stereotype of black people you can think of, and i'm sure they are going to be legendary. 

http://www.google.com/hostednews/ap/article/ALeqM5h760_b3qaOspDzD4yFG4-f7678PQD9915KR01

Skids and Mudflap, twin robots disguised as compact Chevys, constantly brawl and bicker in rap-inspired street slang. They're forced to acknowledge that they can't read. One has a gold tooth.

These two robots have all the trimmings from enormous jug ears, bug eyes, and a enormous gold tooth sticking out of one of their faces to speaking in high pitched voices that remind you of Chris Tucker in Friday. Mudflap and Skids are voiced by Black actor Reno Wilson, and comedian and voice talent Tom Kenny. The dialog suggests that the two robots will start popping a cap in another robot.

IMPRESSIONS FROM SOMEONE ON SOMETHINGAWFUL:

You know the absolute worst part? People in the theater fucking loved Mudflaps and Skids. I live in a somewhat racist area (Southeast Texas, about 10 minutes from Vidor), and walking out of the theater I actually heard a redneck in front of me say, "them two distinguished black fellow robots was the best part." My friends are already calling them the Decepticoons and the Jiggabots, while I'm just trying to forget that I paid to see this.

[youtube=560,345]3poQEBOnZNk[/youtube]



WOW

[The Fake Shemp]

I think it's hysterical.  I am pretty sure it's a meta joke.

[Crushed]

yeah i'm sure michael bay put a meta-joke about racial attitudes in the media in his movie when putting comic relief characters into a movie about giant robots blurring together and exploding

[The Fake Shemp]

I guarantee it!

[Mr. Gundam]

spoiler (click to show/hide)

That's fine and dandy, but when they walk outside they're in what appears to be a DESERT IN THE SOUTHWEST SURROUNDED BY MOUNTAINS. WHAT THE HELL?!?

[close]

This was explained.

This was different than the whole Jetfire teleporting everyone to Egypt thing. Jetfire tears down the walls in the Smithsonian and walks out into a field full of military transport planes surrounded by mountains which was clearly not in D.C. Unless I dozed off, I didn't see any teleporting happening until after that.

It was The Fallen that did that.

What? I guess I turned my brain off too much, because I just started laughing when they walked out of the Smithsonian into that field of airplanes in what was clearly not D.C.

You were kinda suppose to infer that it was him. They didn't blatantly go "PYRAMID ROBOT DID IT!"

Or maybe they did, I was too busy ignoring all the parts without robot on robot action. Going to see it again tomorrow. First movie Ive ever payed to see twice in theaters.

Edit: Will they ever make a live action gundam film? Hopefully based on G Gundam. Hell, will they ever finish Voltron or Robotech?

There is one...

[youtube=560,345][/youtube]

[Flannel Boy]

Crushed cannot appreciate sophisticated humor and social commentary.

[The Fake Shemp]

Hey, I never said it was sophisticated.  You don't need a monocle and a top hat to pull off a meta joke.  I think Bay is well aware of the racial stereotypes presented in the film - he usually is cognisant of the stuff he puts on screen.

[pilonv1]

jiggabots

[Positive Touch]

and seeing them (and they are in a lot of scenes) is so much worse than just reading about them.  my jaw was on the floor because i could not believe that no stepped in at some point and said "hey, this is fucking pathetic and offensive, please take it out of the movie."

[Great Rumbler]

Stupid Question: Why do people watch movies that they know will be horrible?

Just to shit on the movie afterward?
Drinking games?
Unintentional humor?
Boredom?

Because I like giant robots?

Might as well watch Robot Jox then.

[Van Cruncheon]

I think it's hysterical.  I am pretty sure it's a meta joke.

oh, willco

[Mr. Gundam]

Stupid Question: Why do people watch movies that they know will be horrible?

Just to shit on the movie afterward?
Drinking games?
Unintentional humor?
Boredom?

Because I like giant robots?

Might as well watch Robot Jox then.

I already saw it when it came out.

[Great Rumbler]

spoiler (click to show/hide)

That's fine and dandy, but when they walk outside they're in what appears to be a DESERT IN THE SOUTHWEST SURROUNDED BY MOUNTAINS. WHAT THE HELL?!?

[close]

This was explained.

This was different than the whole Jetfire teleporting everyone to Egypt thing. Jetfire tears down the walls in the Smithsonian and walks out into a field full of military transport planes surrounded by mountains which was clearly not in D.C. Unless I dozed off, I didn't see any teleporting happening until after that.

It was The Fallen that did that.

What? I guess I turned my brain off too much, because I just started laughing when they walked out of the Smithsonian into that field of airplanes in what was clearly not D.C.

You were kinda suppose to infer that it was him. They didn't blatantly go "PYRAMID ROBOT DID IT!"

Or maybe they did, I was too busy ignoring all the parts without robot on robot action. Going to see it again tomorrow. First movie Ive ever payed to see twice in theaters.

Edit: Will they ever make a live action gundam film? Hopefully based on G Gundam. Hell, will they ever finish Voltron or Robotech?

There is one...

[youtube=560,345][/youtube]

Woah, look at those graphics! Was this a SyFy original movie?

Well, it was a direct-to-video movie released back in 2000 on a budget of about $9 million.

Also, it was made by Canadians.