I have a bad feeling that ERAGON is going to make a buttload of money

[The Fake Shemp]

 

[Phoenix Dark]

DUH

It's fucking everywhere on the Disney Channel, Cartoon Network, and every other kid channel. Hell I'm taking my brother and 5 of his friends to see it on the first day

[The Fake Shemp]

Thanks for ruining the film industry, Phoenix Dark.  I hate you.

[CajoleJuice]

You're part of the problem, PD. Purposefully get into an accident so you never make it to the movie theater. Do not fund this movie!

[The Fake Shemp]

I agree with Cajole.  May a horrible and fiery accident kill you and all the children you transport to this movie.

[CajoleJuice]

I agree with Cajole.  May a horrible and fiery accident kill you and all the children you transport to this movie.

Well, I was hoping that PD would make the decision on his own, but I wouldn't have a problem if God did it for him.

[Phoenix Dark]

 

I have no choice. I took them all to see Superman Returns and POTC2 last time. Obviously Eragon won't be as good as those movies but I'm thinking it won't be utterly terrible. I refuse to read the book though, especially after I saw an article about how many names from Star Wars/Lord of the Rings are essentially stolen and used by Eragon's author, but with different spelling.

[Human Snorenado]

My roommate and I were watching the foosball earlier and there was a trailer for this.  I told him, "You know, this movie SHOULD have me excited.  I like the genre and want to watch movies like this, but this just looks like poop."

Why am I not surprised that PD is geared up for it? 

[The Fake Shemp]

It's probably the worst book ever written.  That's including TVC's dreadful Smurfs fanfic erotica novel entitled, "Smurfing Interrupted".

[Phoenix Dark]

My roommate and I were watching the foosball earlier and there was a trailer for this.  I told him, "You know, this movie SHOULD have me excited.  I like the genre and want to watch movies like this, but this just looks like poop."

Why am I not surprised that PD is geared up for it? 

I'm not.

Someone tell Triumph my situation; he can't see my posts since he has me on ignore

[The Fake Shemp]

Triumph, Phoenix Dark wanted me to tell you that since you have him on ignore, I'm supposed to say that he's looking forward to ERGAON, arguably the best film of the year.

[Phoenix Dark]

You bitch! You bitch!

[The Fake Shemp]

I hope this movie grosses more than Harry Potter, so I can hear your heart break.

[Human Snorenado]

It's probably the worst book ever written.  That's including TVC's dreadful Smurfs fanfic erotica novel entitled, "Smurfing Interrupted".

It's ok, Willco.  You know that TVC and I are going to both save and revolutionize the modern film industry with the forthcoming "BLACK CALIGULA."  Yeah, I decided that it should be in all caps, much like INLAND EMPIRE.

Triumph, Phoenix Dark wanted me to tell you that since you have him on ignore, I'm supposed to say that he's looking forward to ERGAON, arguably the best film of the year.

Not shocked at all. 

[Raguel]

Hahahah, this movie is gonna make mad cash money. And the boost then fame of the egotiscal and ass of an author. If you have the fortitude, go look at what he comments about his writing style. It's fucking amazing what he says.

[Strife Doombringer]

Dragons are not suppose to have feathers.. its just not right! ill download the cam that way the movie suffers. isnt it a three part series?

[The Fake Shemp]

I applaud him for taking arguably two of the most well known universes, Star Wars and Lord of the Rings, and somehow molding them into a manufactured piece of pop trash that has managed to sell millions.

But I also hate him equally as much.

[Bacon]

Sienna Guillory is pretty so I might see it.

[Raguel]

Hmmm....interesting. On the main Eragon wikipedia page, a whole section about the criticism and derivative nature of this asinine book has been moved.

[Phoenix Dark]

My brother got pissed when I burst his bubble about Eragon.

Phoenix: He just takes names from Lord of The Rings, mis-spells them, and creates crap.
Brother: That's not true!
Phoenix: Arya? Arwen? Aragorn? Eragon?
Brother: NO NO NO. Eragon is not like Aragorn. It's "Dragon" just jumbled up
Phoenix: Um...there is no D in Eragon...so how could it be "Dragon" jumbled up?
Brother: ...bitch!

[max_cool]

tell him santa doesn't exist for the megaton

[DJ_Tet]

It's probably the worst book ever written.  That's including TVC's dreadful Smurfs fanfic erotica novel entitled, "Smurfing Interrupted".

It's ok, Willco.  You know that TVC and I are going to both save and revolutionize the modern film industry with the forthcoming "BLACK CALIGULA."  Yeah, I decided that it should be in all caps, much like INLAND EMPIRE.

Triumph, Phoenix Dark wanted me to tell you that since you have him on ignore, I'm supposed to say that he's looking forward to ERGAON, arguably the best film of the year.

Not shocked at all. 

Black Caligula is such a cumbersome title.  Can I suggest Canigula?

[TVC15]

It's probably the worst book ever written.  That's including TVC's dreadful Smurfs fanfic erotica novel entitled, "Smurfing Interrupted".

You're just upset that in that book I revealed that Gargamel's last name was Federman.

[Boogie]

I'd never even heard of this book/movie until the movie was brought up on GAF.  Is it really that popular among the kiddies today?

[TVC15]

I'd never even heard of this book/movie until the movie was brought up on GAF.  Is it really that popular among the kiddies today?

I know that the first book was really fucking popular.  I'm not sure if it hit number one on the NYT best sellers list, but it was one of those books that lingered towards the top of the charts for months.  I think the second book had a lukewarm reception, but I'm sure there were enough hardcore elite to at least give it the numbers it needed to be big.

[Bloodwake]

This movie looks like FRIED SHIT.

[Phoenix Dark]

I'd never even heard of this book/movie until the movie was brought up on GAF.  Is it really that popular among the kiddies today?

I know that the first book was really fucking popular.  I'm not sure if it hit number one on the NYT best sellers list, but it was one of those books that lingered towards the top of the charts for months.  I think the second book had a lukewarm reception, but I'm sure there were enough hardcore elite to at least give it the numbers it needed to be big.

Both books were massive hits actually (not with critics though)

[The Miles Trahan Burger Experiment]

PD's brother may have worse taste than PD!

[Cheebs]

Narnia made around 300 million around this time last year too remember. LOTR/Harry Potter made ANY fantasy novel based movie released around christmas =  tons of money. This is why people expecting Hobbit to bomb is foolish.

[Deadite]

fuck ERAGON...ROCKY ROCKY!!

[The Fake Shemp]

Yes! Rocky! Rocky!

[Cheebs]

Rocky isn't opening against Eragon

[The Fake Shemp]

Fuck you, Cheebs. Are you rooting against Rocky?  Fucking Commie dragon-loving dog.

[Cheebs]

Fuck you, Cheebs. Are you rooting against Rocky?  Fucking Commie dragon-loving dog.

I don't want to see Eragon. I want to see Rocky. However Eragon will probably make lots of money. 

[Deadite]

Fucking dragons!! 

[The Fake Shemp]

  @ AICN review:

There’s a reason kids that young rarely get publishing deals. Because they tend to do shit like re-write Star Wars with dragons.

[Bacon]

Wow the guy that wrote it is young. That's pretty impressive.


yeah yeah yeah

[Cheebs]

@ AICN review:

There’s a reason kids that young rarely get publishing deals. Because they tend to do shit like re-write Star Wars with dragons.

Star Wars is a re-write of The Hidden Fortress with space ships.

[FlameOfCallandor]

 

The AICN review was funny, but god damn the review was probably as poorly written as the script. Do they even proof read this shit?

[FlameOfCallandor]

@ AICN review:

There’s a reason kids that young rarely get publishing deals. Because they tend to do shit like re-write Star Wars with dragons.

Star Wars is a re-write of The Hidden Fortress with space ships.

Naw, Hidden Fortress just inspired it. Its also ok to rip off a movie if your movie is better (ala star wars).

[The Fake Shemp]

Yeah, I don't think Star Wars is much of a remake.

[Cheebs]

Oh I know. I just felt like saying that.

[The Miles Trahan Burger Experiment]

@ AICN review:

There’s a reason kids that young rarely get publishing deals. Because they tend to do shit like re-write Star Wars with dragons.

Star Wars is a re-write of The Hidden Fortress with space ships.

Aside from the "common man's perspective", the Mifune-esque Kenobi, and the transitions, no.

Definitely not.

[Cheebs]

@ AICN review:

There’s a reason kids that young rarely get publishing deals. Because they tend to do shit like re-write Star Wars with dragons.

Star Wars is a re-write of The Hidden Fortress with space ships.

Aside from the "common man's perspective", the Mifune-esque Kenobi, and the transitions, no.

The two losers are R2-D2 and C-3PO. They even get caught and put into a crowded group of other slaves like with Jawas and the scene is filmed almost EXACTLY as the jawa stuff.

But yeah, its no remake. Very much inspired by though.  Hell, Mifune was supposed to play Obi-Wan.

[Diablos]

Dragons are not suppose to have feathers.. its just not right! ill download the cam that way the movie suffers. isnt it a three part series?

Ah, but does it, though? If you're not going to ever pay to see the movie, but download the cam shot version... think about it. (Also, I'm on your side). That's why I hate it when the MPAA says this will with 100% certainty hurt sales; they don't know that.

[The Miles Trahan Burger Experiment]

Mifune as Obi-Wan would have been so awesome.

[Cheebs]

Mifune as Obi-Wan would have been so awesome.

Yes he would have. Lucas wanted him for it but I don't think Mifune wanted/could make time for it.  Alec Guinness was fantastic but imagining Mifune in A New Hope.... it would have made the movie even better.

[demi]

Dude the game rocks, I have no idea where the story is going :O

[Cheebs]

This film is going to do more than 200 million when all is said and done I fear.  :'( It seems since Potter/LOTR that there is some sort of fantasy fetish Americans have around christmas that needs to be filled. Hell Narnia made 300 million nearly.

[The Miles Trahan Burger Experiment]

Is it just me, or does the Dragon on the one sheet look like it has down syndrome?

[Phoenix Dark]

It came out today. I thought my brother would have called me by now lol. Hopefully he won't call and I won't have to take him on opening day

I don't want to be seen there...

[The Fake Shemp]

You secretly want to go - admit it

[Cheebs]

who do you fear seeing you there? Just say you are seeing Charlotte's Web. 

[The Miles Trahan Burger Experiment]

You secretly want to go - admit it

 

[Phoenix Dark]

who do you fear seeing you there? Just say you are seeing Charlotte's Web. 

I just don't want to be there on fucking opening day for Eragon. Granted I saw the first Harry Potter on opening day, but I was younger then. I'm fucking 19 now:-\

[Himu]

@ AICN review:

There’s a reason kids that young rarely get publishing deals. Because they tend to do shit like re-write Star Wars with dragons.

 

How old is the author?

[Soul Pole Deluxx]

I saw it at an advanced screening, it's fucking AWESOME!

[The Miles Trahan Burger Experiment]

Wow, one star from DVDTalk. This is definitely one of the worst reviewed "big" movies in a while.

[Phoenix Dark]

I'm going to see it at 5:20

[Melissa]

This AD&D nonsense is not blockbuster material.  It may take #1 for the weekend because of heavy marketing, but it won't be breaking the low 20s. Charlotte's Web and The Pursuit of Happyness will pull people away from this, and hopefully one of them will snag the #1 spot.  Even the dancing penguins and Bond still pose a threat.

Horrible reviews don't help things: http://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/eragon/

Eragon: 13%
Pursuit of Happyness: 61%
Charlotte's Web: 84%

"It's a turd, mama...a turd!"