Author Topic: Yer 2009 NFL thread of REAL football played by REAL Americans (Read 72276 times)

Human Snorenado · « **on:** September 05, 2009, 02:32:26 PM »

None of this pansy euro shit here, no sir! We're talking REAL FOOTBALL played by REAL MEN for REAL MONEY. No lame ass college discussion allowed in this thread either- we talk about a football league that has the common decency to have a playoff system instead of what amounts to a beauty pageant, a league where anyone running a spread offense (other than the Patriots, cause they're just THAT AWESOME) would get laughed at and then beaten like a prime era Tyson opponent.

Yes, we're talking NFL FOOTBALL in here, ladies.

I've gone ahead and created two pick em leagues to start with- a straight up weekly pick 'em and a survival pick 'em. If enough people want it, I'll create a confidence points pick em, too. They're both yahoo, and heres the info:

Pick em
league id: 45964
password: lepers

Survival pick em
league id: 17863
password: dickbutkus

Now we can go ahead and mock Maurice for being a Lions fan, or Federwang for being a Redskins fan. YOU MUST DECIDE!

Human Snorenado · « **Reply #1 on:** September 05, 2009, 02:33:37 PM »

I guess I'll go ahead and pm all of the guys in the fantasy league, but DON'T FUCKING FORGET THAT OUR DRAFT IS TOMORROW AT 3:30 EASTERN! ...fuckers

The Fake Shemp · « **Reply #2 on:** September 05, 2009, 02:38:09 PM »

I will be there. Possibly drunk.

Human Snorenado · « **Reply #3 on:** September 05, 2009, 02:40:00 PM »

Quote from: Willco on September 05, 2009, 02:38:09 PM

I will be there. Possibly drunk.

Sign up for the pick 'ems, too! Or we'll ship you off to Israel while you're passed out from drinking!

The Fake Shemp · « **Reply #4 on:** September 05, 2009, 02:41:26 PM »

Human Snorenado · « **Reply #5 on:** September 05, 2009, 02:42:40 PM »

Those HAWT JEWISH COMMANDO CHICKS will whip your ass into line, too!

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #6 on:** September 05, 2009, 02:47:36 PM »

In the case that I can't make it tomorrow, would someone be able to draft for me? I'd pm them my depth chart of course

I should be there, but sometimes sunday school goes a little long

The Fake Shemp · « **Reply #7 on:** September 05, 2009, 02:49:34 PM »

The computer drafts for you, just set it up.

The Fake Shemp · « **Reply #8 on:** September 05, 2009, 02:51:41 PM »

Redskins put Colt Brennan on IR, so no Jessica Simpson curse. Hooray!

Human Snorenado · « **Reply #9 on:** September 05, 2009, 02:55:28 PM »

Quote from: Phoenix Dark on September 05, 2009, 02:47:36 PM

In the case that I can't make it tomorrow, would someone be able to draft for me? I'd pm them my depth chart of course

I should be there, but sometimes sunday school goes a little long

Maurice, you need to explain to your family that football is more important than your space fairy god.

But yes, set your pre-rankings and it will be fine. Well, not fine but better than if you don't set your pre-rankings. Then again, that's assuming you know what you're doing.

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #10 on:** September 05, 2009, 03:01:30 PM »

I'm not worried at all actually, I do well in yahoo generated sports competitions.

OptimoPeach · « **Reply #11 on:** September 05, 2009, 03:02:28 PM »

I'm too lazy to do the draft. I'm just glad real sports are starting up again.

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #12 on:** September 05, 2009, 03:04:11 PM »

btw what's the draft order? Who gets first pick

Himu · « **Reply #13 on:** September 05, 2009, 03:09:25 PM »

I'd love to join in but...I've never played fantasy football.

Human Snorenado · « **Reply #14 on:** September 05, 2009, 03:23:05 PM »

Quote from: Phoenix Dark on September 05, 2009, 03:04:11 PM

btw what's the draft order? Who gets first pick

Draft order is determined randomly by yahoo's socialist overlord computers 30 minutes before start time.

I'm telling you pee dee, you're gonna want to make every effort to make the draft.

CajoleJuice · « **Reply #15 on:** September 05, 2009, 03:24:11 PM »

I should probably just let Yahoo draft for me, it's not like I know anything about football, let alone fantasy football.

Himu · « **Reply #16 on:** September 05, 2009, 03:24:35 PM »

Same.

Human Snorenado · « **Reply #17 on:** September 05, 2009, 03:31:54 PM »

Quote from: Himuro on September 05, 2009, 03:24:35 PM

Same.

...you're not in the league! The stuff I posted above is just picking winners and losers for each week, go ahead and sign up for it.

And Juice, your sorry ass had better make the draft tomorrow or I will set my David Wright voodoo doll on fire. For everyone in the league, let me just emphasize again that QBs are going to be much more valuable than yahoo's rankings think they are under our league set up.

Akala · « **Reply #18 on:** September 06, 2009, 02:05:35 PM »

about how long does the draft take? is it all live, or how long do you get to make decisions?

you don't need rounded teams in this right? it's just stat battles? maybe I should read up on this...

spoiler (click to show/hide)

ogod I'm gonna get smoked $:-\$

[close]

Human Snorenado · « **Reply #19 on:** September 06, 2009, 02:08:38 PM »

There are 23 rounds of 8 picks. There's a 90 second timer on each pick. If someone isn't there, yahoo will pick for them according to their rankings or the rankings that the manager set after fifteen seconds.

It might take an hour and a half or so, probably less.

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #20 on:** September 06, 2009, 02:10:08 PM »

holy shit i thought were were picked 12 players

Akala · « **Reply #21 on:** September 06, 2009, 02:34:59 PM »

ah. hopefully my connection stays somewhat stable. had to buy a wireless card because I didn't want to drill holes, so it's kind of spazzy. I may miss a pick or two.

also, going to grab a bite, will be back for the draft though. may be buzzin.

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #22 on:** September 06, 2009, 02:39:23 PM »

No sunday school but they umped the ante by demanding I come to a carnival and hand out cards for their business. Meh, so I decided to come to the library and "study"

But instead of being in a quiet environment I'm surrounded by LOUD freshmen on a tour.

edit: http://sports.espn.go.com/nfl/trainingcamp09/news/story?id=4449108
lolol millen

The Fake Shemp · « **Reply #23 on:** September 06, 2009, 03:20:07 PM »

SAN DIEGO -- San Diego Chargers star linebacker Shawne Merriman was arrested on suspicion of choking and restraining his girlfriend, a reality TV star, as she tried to leave his Southern California home, authorities said.

Roid rage!

Human Snorenado · « **Reply #24 on:** September 06, 2009, 03:24:44 PM »

He tried to choke Tila Tequila- we should be giving him the Congressional Medal of Freedom.

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #25 on:** September 06, 2009, 03:55:19 PM »

Hmm so I'm guessing that's good for a 2 game suspension or so?

draft him Himu

Human Snorenado · « **Reply #26 on:** September 06, 2009, 04:04:11 PM »

Draft order is:

akala
Pee Dee
Cajole
BlackMage
Malek
Willco
Me
Mandark

Drafting in between Federwang and Mandark, I think it's safe to say that I won't be getting any good Redskins OR Sage Rosenfels.

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #27 on:** September 06, 2009, 04:07:02 PM »

edit: oh shit it's on

Mandark · « **Reply #28 on:** September 06, 2009, 04:13:44 PM »

Sandwich pick! AWM NOM NOM!

The Fake Shemp · « **Reply #29 on:** September 06, 2009, 04:15:11 PM »

I have probably the worst position in the draft.

The Fake Shemp · « **Reply #30 on:** September 06, 2009, 04:20:23 PM »

Mandark, want to trade my first and second round draft pick for your first and second pick?

Mandark · « **Reply #31 on:** September 06, 2009, 04:22:40 PM »

1ST ROUND

Willco: I'll take Chris Cooley!

Triumph: Okay...

2ND ROUND

Willco: I'll take Christy Oglevee-Cooley!

Triumph: What? You can't do that.

Willco: Look, you said this is a fantasy league. Well my fantasy is having a threesome with the Cooleys!

Triumph: Fine! Whatever.

PhoenixDark: Wait. If that's how it works, I'm picking Visanthe Shiancoe.

The Fake Shemp · « **Reply #32 on:** September 06, 2009, 04:23:10 PM »

O snap

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #33 on:** September 06, 2009, 04:24:39 PM »

I'm at the library smh $:-\$

CajoleJuice · « **Reply #34 on:** September 06, 2009, 05:44:28 PM »

I had three ranking tabs open during that entire draft. That's all I went by. Tried to average out the differences in each ranking system.

Mandark · « **Reply #35 on:** September 06, 2009, 05:45:25 PM »

I was lost with all that IDP stuff. I didn't know half the names and Yahoo's ranking system for defensive players is random.

Not as in "wow that guy's overrated" either. The IDP rankings seem to be completely random and have nothing to do with stats.

Human Snorenado · « **Reply #36 on:** September 06, 2009, 05:47:42 PM »

1.    (7)    Tom Brady
2.    (10)    Philip Rivers
3.    (23)    Frank Gore
4.    (26)    Reggie Wayne
5.    (39)    Steve Slaton
6.    (42)    Wes Welker
7.    (55)    Vincent Jackson
8.    (58)    Patrick Willis
9.    (71)    Chris Cooley
10.    (74)    Eddie Royal
11.    (87)    Jon Beason
12.    (90)    Chad Pennington
13.    (103)    Derrick Ward
14.    (106)    Barrett Ruud
15.    (119)    Eric Weddle
16.    (122)    Cedric Benson
17.    (135)    Yeremiah Bell
18.    (138)    Brady Quinn
19.    (151)    Derrick Mason
20.    (154)    Kirk Morrison
21.    (167)    Antoine Winfield
22.    (170)    Kevin Boss

Mandark- yeah the idp rankings are clearly borked. I pretty much just draft by solo tackles.

Himu · « **Reply #37 on:** September 06, 2009, 05:48:19 PM »

I missed the draft.

The Fake Shemp · « **Reply #38 on:** September 06, 2009, 05:48:21 PM »

Good draft, although I inadvertently drafted someone on IR (Bradley), because I was lost with their LB rankings (not used to drafting LBs).

I recommend that next year we drop the IDP and opt for a team defense and add a utility spot on offense.

I am surprised I got Julius Peppers and DeMarcus Ware.

Human Snorenado · « **Reply #39 on:** September 06, 2009, 05:50:23 PM »

Quote from: Himuro on September 06, 2009, 05:48:19 PM

I missed the draft.

For the last time: YOU'RE NOT IN THE LEAGUE! You signed up for the pick 'em.

Willco- team defenses are gay, and not the good kind- I mean the HAPPY kind. There's a reason you got Peppers and Ware- click on your team and look at how many points they put up last year. Then click on my team and look at how many points my bruisers put up.

Mandark · « **Reply #40 on:** September 06, 2009, 05:53:43 PM »

1.    (8)    Peyton Manning    QB
2.    (9)    Aaron Rodgers    QB
3.    (24)    Calvin Johnson    WR
4.    (25)    Clinton Portis    RB
5.    (40)    Marion Barber    RB
6.    (41)    Ryan Grant    RB
7.    (56)    Santana Moss    WR
8.    (57)    Anthony Gonzalez    WR
9.    (72)    Owen Daniels    TE
10.    (73)    Marshawn Lynch    RB
11.    (88)    Knowshon Moreno    RB
12.    (89)    Lance Moore    WR
13.    (104)    Darren Sproles    RB
14.    (105)    Jonathan Vilma    LB
15.    (120)    Karlos Dansby    LB
16.    (121)    Gibril Wilson    S
17.    (136)    D'Qwell Jackson    LB
18.    (137)    DeAngelo Hall    CB
19.    (152)    Percy Harvin    WR
20.    (153)    Leon Washington    RB
21.    (168)    Brandon Meriweather    S
22.    (169)    Chris Henry    WR

Washington and Henry are my sleepers this year. If either of them have breakout seasons, it'll be EXTRA BONUS VALIDATION POINTS for me.

Akala · « **Reply #41 on:** September 06, 2009, 05:56:44 PM »

I'm gonna have to shuffle some players around. Not that projected points mean much, but Malek is projected to beat me atm. I predict I won't know what the fuck I'm doing for at least half of the season, at which point it will be too late. $:-\$

CajoleJuice · « **Reply #42 on:** September 06, 2009, 05:56:52 PM »

Ok, I'm glad I wasn't the only one lost with those IDP rankings. There were no rankings, really.

The Fake Shemp · « **Reply #43 on:** September 06, 2009, 05:57:45 PM »

Quote from: The Card Cheat on September 06, 2009, 05:50:23 PM

Quote from: Himuro on September 06, 2009, 05:48:19 PM
I missed the draft.

For the last time: YOU'RE NOT IN THE LEAGUE! You signed up for the pick 'em.

Willco- team defenses are gay, and not the good kind- I mean the HAPPY kind. There's a reason you got Peppers and Ware- click on your team and look at how many points they put up last year. Then click on my team and look at how many points my bruisers put up.

So the point system skews in favor of tackles over stuff like turnovers and sacks? That's pretty stupid.

CajoleJuice · « **Reply #44 on:** September 06, 2009, 05:58:16 PM »

Triumph rigged the league for his benefit.

The Fake Shemp · « **Reply #45 on:** September 06, 2009, 06:03:34 PM »

Sounds like it! Our commish totally screwed us!

The Fake Shemp · « **Reply #46 on:** September 06, 2009, 06:07:15 PM »

1.   (6)   DeAngelo Williams   RB
2.   (11)   Chris Johnson   RB
3.   (22)   Greg Jennings   WR
4.   (27)   Roddy White   WR
5.   (38)   Matt Schaub   QB
6.   (43)   Tony Gonzalez   TE
7.   (54)   Matt Cassel     QB
8.   (59)   Ronnie Brown   RB
9.   (70)   Braylon Edwards   WR
10.   (75)   Lee Evans   WR
11.   (86)   Joe Flacco   QB
12.   (91)   Jerricho Cotchery   WR
13.   (102)   Ray Rice   RB
14.   (107)   DeMarcus Ware   LB
15.   (118)   Ed Reed   S
16.   (123)   Visanthe Shiancoe   TE
17.   (134)   Julius Peppers   DE
18.   (139)   Tramon Williams   CB
19.   (150)   Michael Crabtree   WR
20.   (155)   Joey Porter   LB
21.   (166)   Stewart Bradley   LB
22.   (171)   LaRon Landry   S

... I thought all were decent picks considering my position, except Bradley, who is on IR. $:-\$

Crabtree better not be a bust!

I will be accepting trade offers for Shiancoe. Feel free to drop me a line.

Human Snorenado · « **Reply #47 on:** September 06, 2009, 06:25:03 PM »

Quote from: Willco on September 06, 2009, 05:57:45 PM

Quote from: The Card Cheat on September 06, 2009, 05:50:23 PM
Quote from: Himuro on September 06, 2009, 05:48:19 PM
I missed the draft.

For the last time: YOU'RE NOT IN THE LEAGUE! You signed up for the pick 'em.

Willco- team defenses are gay, and not the good kind- I mean the HAPPY kind. There's a reason you got Peppers and Ware- click on your team and look at how many points they put up last year. Then click on my team and look at how many points my bruisers put up.

So the point system skews in favor of tackles over stuff like turnovers and sacks? That's pretty stupid.

Not really. You get more points for interceptions, sacks and passes deflected/defensed than you would under a normal yahoo set up. The reason players who get a lot of sacks/ints/whatever don't score as many points is that they just don't sack the qb/intercept a pass/deflect a pass THAT FREAKING OFTEN. If I pump up the points any for those any more, it risks becoming stupid- 6 points for an interception or a sack? Really?

As for the scoring, it's not like it was a secret or anything. It was all there in the first post of the original thread! And despite yahoo's idp rankings sucking, both Mandark and Malek managed to draft pretty solid defensive players. The key was focusing on tackles, since that's obviously the most common thing that a defensive player does!

edit- has Crabtree even SIGNED yet?

The Fake Shemp · « **Reply #48 on:** September 06, 2009, 06:44:45 PM »

Nah, but the Niners said they'd get it done last weekend.

I still think the scoring system is a bit of hogwash, and pardon me for thinking the league had a similar scoring system to every league I've ever played in. I mean, even in leagues where I have drafted IDP, I still have never seen tacklers outscore turnover and sack specialists.

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #49 on:** September 06, 2009, 10:13:07 PM »

1.    (2)    Adrian Peterson
2.    (15)    Kurt Warner
3.    (18)    Randy Moss
4.    (31)    Matt Ryan
5.    (34)    Brandon Jacobs
6.    (47)    Antonio Bryant
7.    (50)    Ben Roethlisberger
8.    (63)    Reggie Bush
9.    (66)    Hines Ward
10.    (79)    DeSean Jackson
11.    (82)    Ellis Hobbs
12.    (95)    LenDale White
13.    (98)    John Carlson
14.    (111)    Danieal Manning
15.    (114)    Leodis McKelvin
16.    (127)    Jerod Mayo
17.    (130)    Steve Breaston
18.    (143)    Antrel Rolle
19.    (146)    Paul Posluszny
20.    (159)    Ted Ginn Jr.
21.    (162)    Willis McGahee
22.    (175)    Osi Umenyiora

Didn't get a lot of people I wanted but I did alright.

The Fake Shemp · « **Reply #50 on:** September 06, 2009, 11:00:10 PM »

Yeah, your squad is pretty beast.

Mandark · « **Reply #51 on:** September 07, 2009, 01:44:21 AM »

Actually, Willco's IDP's don't look too bad. In this scoring system Ware put up a lot of points last year and is projected #4 this year. Peppers had 110 points which isn't great but not bad either.

It's the pure rushers who get almost not tackles like Dwight Freeney that really suffer.

Boogie · « **Reply #52 on:** September 07, 2009, 01:56:34 AM »

This fantasy draft is stupid.

Football is stupid.

I bet any EB'er $50 that Canada wins tbe 2010 Olympic Men's Hockey Gold Medal.

spoiler (click to show/hide)

of course, pay no mind to the fact that I'll be there and may be able to affect the results....

[close]

Flannel Boy · « **Reply #53 on:** September 07, 2009, 02:12:43 AM »

The Russians will have a stacked team. If they show up and care a little, they can easily beat Canada.

Boogie · « **Reply #54 on:** September 07, 2009, 02:20:23 AM »

Quote from: Malek on September 07, 2009, 02:12:43 AM

The Russians will have a stacked team. If they show up and care a little, they can easily beat Canada.

Oh, don't worry, I'll arrange something...

in serious, though, I'm not sure how Ovechkin + Malkin = stacked team.

Canada will always have the most stacked team going into any true international competition. It's just a matter of whether we can muster the coaching, preparation, motivation, and consistancy to match our inherent skill, which will determine whether we meet our potential...

Flannel Boy · « **Reply #55 on:** September 07, 2009, 02:32:38 AM »

Quote from: Boogie on September 07, 2009, 02:20:23 AM

in serious, though, I'm not sure how Ovechkin + Malkin = stacked team.

I don't know how the two best hockey players help make a team stacked. And Kovalchuk, Datsyuk, Semin, Radulov, Kovalev, and Nabokov sure won't help.

CajoleJuice · « **Reply #56 on:** September 07, 2009, 02:34:21 AM »

What kind of bullshit derail is this garbage?

Flannel Boy · « **Reply #57 on:** September 07, 2009, 02:37:50 AM »

I can't believe Yzerman didn't ask Bertuzzi to join the team again!

Himu · « **Reply #58 on:** September 07, 2009, 02:39:31 AM »

smh canadians

Boogie · « **Reply #59 on:** September 07, 2009, 02:41:00 AM »

Quote from: Malek on September 07, 2009, 02:32:38 AM

Quote from: Boogie on September 07, 2009, 02:20:23 AM
in serious, though, I'm not sure how Ovechkin + Malkin = stacked team.

I don't know how the two best hockey players help make a team stacked. And Kovalchuk, Datsyuk, Semin, Radulov, Kovalev, and Nabokov sure won't help.

Fucking Commie. We should revoke your citizenship...

Quote from: CajoleJuice on September 07, 2009, 02:34:21 AM

What kind of bullshit derail is this garbage?

Hey now, we're talking about a true manly sport, here, where people don't get their panties in a knot when men throw some punches...

Quote from: Malek on September 07, 2009, 02:37:50 AM

I can't believe Yzerman didn't ask Bertuzzi to join the team again!

Truly shocking... :p

News:

Author Topic: Yer 2009 NFL thread of REAL football played by REAL Americans (Read 72276 times)