Conan's career is over, Leno returns to his rightful throne as King of Late Nite

[The Fake Shemp]

Oh my God it's real

[TakingBackSunday]

on hulu

[The Fake Shemp]

Conan can't even keep it together

[Raban]

edit:
http://losangeles.craigslist.org/sfv/clt/1551463643.html

HAHAHAHA

[Himu]

Andy

[TakingBackSunday]

yay andy! 

[The Fake Shemp]

Andy is killing it

[Great Rumbler]

"I spent some money...I spent a LOT of money."

[Himu]

"I spent 400 grand on my son's bar mitzvah...he's 9! And I'm Lutheran"

[BobFromPikeCreek]

We're Lutheran.

[CajoleJuice]

shoot baskets

[Himu]

"Shoot baskets"

[BobFromPikeCreek]

 

[The Fake Shemp]

They do not give a fuck anymore

[TakingBackSunday]

I wonder what the chances are of them just pulling Conan early next week

[Raban]

Is tonight's episode up anywhere already? I can't wait two more hours to watch this shit, I'm gonna die of anticipation

[Oblivion]

The transcript from the Kimmel annihilation for those that can't view the video:

Some choice quotes, courtesy Kimmel:

[Asked by Leno what the best prank he ever pulled was] "The best prank I ever pulled was I told a guy that—five years from now—I'm gonna give you my show. And then when the five years came, I gave it to him, and then I took it back almost instantly."

[Asked by Leno if he ever orders anything off of the TV] "Like NBC ordered your show off the TV?"

[Asked by Leno what the record is for number of lap dances he's received in one night] "Strippers, I don't like in general. Because you have this phony relationship with them for money, similar to that of when you and Conan were on The Tonight Show together, passing the torch... you know what I'm saying."

[Asked by Leno what he hasn't yet hosted, but would like to] "Oh, this is a trick, right? Where you get me to host The Tonight Show and then take it back from me?"

[Asked why he came on to do the segment] "Listen, Jay, Conan and I have children—all you have to take care of is cars. I mean, we have lives to lead here. You've got $800 million, for God's sakes—leave our shows alone."

Just looking at those questions, it seems pretty obvious it was planned.

[The Fake Shemp]

I wonder what the chances are of them just pulling Conan early next week

I think if Stern really comes on the show, there's a shot of him getting yanked. That could get ugly. Or it could be totally anti-climatic.

[Raban]

I wonder what the chances are of them just pulling Conan early next week

I think if Stern really comes on the show, there's a shot of him getting yanked. That could get ugly. Or it could be totally anti-climatic.

Stern said he didn't want to play a funnyman, he just wants to have a conversation with Conan. I think that's better, personally.

[TakingBackSunday]

The transcript from the Kimmel annihilation for those that can't view the video:

Some choice quotes, courtesy Kimmel:

[Asked by Leno what the best prank he ever pulled was] "The best prank I ever pulled was I told a guy that—five years from now—I'm gonna give you my show. And then when the five years came, I gave it to him, and then I took it back almost instantly."

[Asked by Leno if he ever orders anything off of the TV] "Like NBC ordered your show off the TV?"

[Asked by Leno what the record is for number of lap dances he's received in one night] "Strippers, I don't like in general. Because you have this phony relationship with them for money, similar to that of when you and Conan were on The Tonight Show together, passing the torch... you know what I'm saying."

[Asked by Leno what he hasn't yet hosted, but would like to] "Oh, this is a trick, right? Where you get me to host The Tonight Show and then take it back from me?"

[Asked why he came on to do the segment] "Listen, Jay, Conan and I have children—all you have to take care of is cars. I mean, we have lives to lead here. You've got $800 million, for God's sakes—leave our shows alone."

Just looking at those questions, it seems pretty obvious it was planned.

Dude, you need to watch it.  Leno looked pissed.

[Himu]

The transcript from the Kimmel annihilation for those that can't view the video:

Some choice quotes, courtesy Kimmel:

[Asked by Leno what the best prank he ever pulled was] "The best prank I ever pulled was I told a guy that—five years from now—I'm gonna give you my show. And then when the five years came, I gave it to him, and then I took it back almost instantly."

[Asked by Leno if he ever orders anything off of the TV] "Like NBC ordered your show off the TV?"

[Asked by Leno what the record is for number of lap dances he's received in one night] "Strippers, I don't like in general. Because you have this phony relationship with them for money, similar to that of when you and Conan were on The Tonight Show together, passing the torch... you know what I'm saying."

[Asked by Leno what he hasn't yet hosted, but would like to] "Oh, this is a trick, right? Where you get me to host The Tonight Show and then take it back from me?"

[Asked why he came on to do the segment] "Listen, Jay, Conan and I have children—all you have to take care of is cars. I mean, we have lives to lead here. You've got $800 million, for God's sakes—leave our shows alone."

Just looking at those questions, it seems pretty obvious it was planned.

Did you see Leno's face? No way.

[The Fake Shemp]

Just looking at those questions, it seems pretty obvious it was planned.

Not really. Some of those answers have absolutely nothing to do with the questions, and Kimmel would take the long way around to get those choice quotes. Plus, Leno was trying to cut him off several times (succeeded once). Leno has nothing to gain from being portrayed as an asshole either, especially since the vast library of evidence suggests he's obsessed with other people's opinions of him.

[Oblivion]

No, I didn't see the video. Guess I know what I'll be watchin tonight.

[Raban]

What's strange about Leno is that he's had the most success, and yet has been the most immature when it comes to anything like this. Hiding in a closet, whining about getting booted, axing his own show to undercut Conan, holy shit, man.

[The Fake Shemp]

I think Leno expected some playful jabbing, like when Kimmel responded with what characters he references when forming a Leno impression, but the other shit is just pure evil.

[CajoleJuice]

VIOLIN? THIS SHIT WOULDN'T FLY ON LENO'S WORKING CLASS TONIGHT SHOW

[The Fake Shemp]

More elitist liberal Harvard programming, I see

[The Fake Shemp]

All this shit has to be a gold mine for someone wanting to write The Late Shift 2.

[BobFromPikeCreek]

All this shit has to be a gold mine for someone wanting to write The Late Shift 2.

So when do you plan on starting?

[drew]

jesus christ i turned it off right when she started up again

im pretty sure i heard a collective sigh from the audience

[Mandark]

5 Reasons Jay Leno Is the Devil


I haven't even read this yet but it's by Phil Nugent so it's gotta be good.

[The Fake Shemp]

All this shit has to be a gold mine for someone wanting to write The Late Shift 2.

So when do you plan on starting?

I bogged down in too many projects as is!

... Someone brought up a good point that Kimmel was pretty well-behaved until Leno blew him off, in a fairly rude manner, when Kimmel asked if he would answer questions on his show. That's when Leno looked at his non-existent wrist watch and went, "LOL I AM BUSY BUDDY SRY"

Then Kimmel went nuts.

[BobFromPikeCreek]

Evangeline Lilly is on Kimmel right now and she's pretty much the perfect woman.

[TakingBackSunday]

craig is awesome

[CajoleJuice]

Evangeline Lilly is on Kimmel right now and she's pretty much the perfect woman.

Meh.

[BobFromPikeCreek]

Maybe not on a solely aesthetic level.

[Great Rumbler]

http://tv.gawker.com/5448615/jay-leno-turns-the-tables-bashes-conan-obrien-with-biting-monologue

That interview is amazing.  

[fistfulofmetal]

http://www.blogcadre.com/files/images/evangeline_lilly.jpg

Meh.

omg

and this chick on jimmy now is pretty hot too. nice legs.

[CajoleJuice]

I knew fistful would love that pic.

[The Fake Shemp]

She looks like a pretzel.

[drew]

only fistful could make complimenting evangeline lilly creepy

[fistfulofmetal]

great body.

[BlueTsunami]

Not that Ferguson has said anything regarding this whole situation but I'm now a convert to him.

Evangeline is totally a perfect face vs average body scenario. This doesn't mean I'd not ravage it, theoretically (which is never).

[drew]

see what i mean?

[CajoleJuice]

Not that Ferguson has said anything regarding this whole situation but I'm now a convert to him.

Evangeline is totally a perfect face vs average body scenario. This doesn't mean I'd not ravage it, theoretically (which is never).

January Jones > Evangeline Lilly, you should know this!

[BlueTsunami]

Not that Ferguson has said anything regarding this whole situation but I'm now a convert to him.

Evangeline is totally a perfect face vs average body scenario. This doesn't mean I'd not ravage it, theoretically (which is never).

January Jones > Evangeline Lilly, you should know this!

Yes. And Face and Body, Mrs.Jones

Interestingly though, both Lilly and Jones have good (and similar) taste in music as me  (as if that counts for anything and I'm basing this off their iTunes playlists)

[TakingBackSunday]

what great television  

even though Conan is gone, at least all of this has told me that I'll be pretty much CBS exclusive for late night television.  And when Letterman gets boring (that's easy), I'll switch on Kimmel.

[CajoleJuice]

Not that Ferguson has said anything regarding this whole situation but I'm now a convert to him.

Evangeline is totally a perfect face vs average body scenario. This doesn't mean I'd not ravage it, theoretically (which is never).

January Jones > Evangeline Lilly, you should know this!

Yes. And Face and Body, Mrs.Jones

Interestingly though, both Lilly and Jones have good (and similar) taste in music as me  (as if that counts for anything)

God she looked beyond amazing in that Italy episode jesuussssssssss

[drew]

i cant stand letterman, if only for that bald bastard, nobody gives a fuck what you think, shut the fuck up

[Barry Egan]

january jones is dumb as a stump.  At least Lily's got some sass 

[TakingBackSunday]

i cant stand letterman, if only for that bald bastard, nobody gives a fuck what you think, shut the fuck up

yeah I agree with ya on that.  But I like Letterman's asshole-ery every once and a while.

[CajoleJuice]

january jones is dumb as a stump.  At least Lily's got some sass 

Dumber than Elisha Cuthbert?

[The Fake Shemp]

Yeah, to be fair, Kimmel is rarely this funny. He can be incredibly sharp, but I feel like he's Randy Moss - he only plays when he feels like it.

[CajoleJuice]

He's just really good at being a dick.

[Barry Egan]

january jones is dumb as a stump.  At least Lily's got some sass 

Dumber than Elisha Cuthbert?

No one's that dumb.

[Barry Egan]

well, FoC.

[Cormacaroni]

The transcript from the Kimmel annihilation for those that can't view the video:

Some choice quotes, courtesy Kimmel:

[Asked by Leno if he ever orders anything off of the TV] "Like NBC ordered your show off the TV?"


[Asked by Leno what he hasn't yet hosted, but would like to] "Oh, this is a trick, right? Where you get me to host The Tonight Show and then take it back from me?"

[Asked why he came on to do the segment] "Listen, Jay, Conan and I have children—all you have to take care of is cars. I mean, we have lives to lead here. You've got $800 million, for God's sakes—leave our shows alone."

Respect +1,000,000

The first one is such a fantastic set-up. Did Leno really serve that one up to him straight?

[The Fake Shemp]

I believe he talked about buying stuff off TV as well, but it was pretty vicious.

[Gruco]

5 Reasons Jay Leno Is the Devil


I haven't even read this yet but it's by Phil Nugent so it's gotta be good.

Loved this bit

This is the Leno who, when he heard Nancy Reagan had won some public-service Woman of the Year award, shot back, “I’m so glad she beat out that conniving little bitch Mother Teresa.”

So apparently the man actually used to be funny.  Weird.

[Himu]

"This is the Leno who, when he heard Nancy Reagan had won some public-service Woman of the Year award, shot back, “I’m so glad she beat out that conniving little bitch Mother Teresa.”