Tiger Woods grovels for your acceptance and to buy his products today

[Stoney Mason]

I wish he would tell everybody to fuck off and grow up and mind their business but that's not the world we live in and he's so eager to have you buy his shit so he can buy a small nation.

[Human Snorenado]

Apparently he hasn't pretended to suffer enough, so he's going back into "therapy" for his "addiction" next week.

[drew]

why buy a small nation when you can colonize one?

[Stoney Mason]

Yep. "Getting a lot of tail" is quite the debilitating disease that effects millions every year.

[BobbyRobby]

that's what's up

[The Fake Shemp]

An overactive sex life plagues thousands of Americans each year. Unsuspecting loved ones could be living a carefree life of ecstasy and sexual fulfillment that threatens their life. With only a small donate of one cent a day, you could bring prolonged sexual frustration to these individuals.

[Cormacaroni]

An overactive sex life plagues thousands of Americans each year. Unsuspecting loved ones could be living a carefree life of ecstasy and sexual fulfillment that threatens their life. With only a small donate of one cent a day, you could bring prolonged sexual frustration to these individuals.

The one cent goes towards an EB membership?

[Phoenix Dark]

Dude should have just admitted to personal problems in his marriage, apologize, then say his personal life is private so gtfo. Hiding made the media dig to the bone.

[Howard Alan Treesong]

I hate you for making this thread, I'd gone nearly two days without thinking about Tiger Woods, goddammit

[Brehvolution]

Yesterday, I was listening to a guy on the radio that said the first time he met TW was in a strip club when TW was only 17. He said that Tiger had a blond under each arm at the place. He said he was surprised when TW announced he was getting married considering the party life he loved and that he wasn't surprised at allwith the infidelity.

[The Fake Shemp]

Does your friend refer to him as "Tee-Dubya"?

[Robo]

I hate you for making this thread, I'd gone nearly two days without thinking about Tiger Woods, goddammit

They say that BREAKING UP IS HARD TO DO
Now I know, I know that it's true
Don't say that this is the end
Instead of breaking up, I wish that we were making up again

spoiler (click to show/hide)

[close]

[The Fake Shemp]

Well, now that he's sorry, I guess I can start buying Nike shoes again.

[tehjaybo]

A convo between two of my friends on facebook about this.

spoiler (click to show/hide)

Friend 1: hey guys pay attention! Tiger Woods is about to say something!!!11

Friend 2: He's the boxer that bites people, right?

Friend 1: Amongst other things.

Friend 1: Wow, this is so incredibly over the top. It's like he's giving a Presidential address.

Friend 2: I thought that was the president. They all look the same to me.

[close]

[Madrun Badrun]

A convo between two of my friends on facebook about this.

spoiler (click to show/hide)

Friend 1: hey guys pay attention! Tiger Woods is about to say something!!!11

Friend 2: He's the boxer that bites people, right?

Friend 1: Amongst other things.

Friend 1: Wow, this is so incredibly over the top. It's like he's giving a Presidential address.

Friend 2: I thought that was the president. They all look the same to me.

[close]

[Diunx]

this is almost as pathetic as the nipple incident.

[Stoney Mason]

It's awesome that public figures are expected to apologize to us for their private transgressions.  I feel so validated "wow, Tiger Woods apologized to me today."

[youtube=560,345][/youtube]

 

[Great Rumbler]

If I was Tiger I'd just come and say "Hey, you people out there. I'm rich. I waste more money every day on things I don't need and will never use than you'll ever make in your entire life. I could BUY you if I wanted. I could have sex with a dozen hookers on my front lawn right now if I wanted to and there's nothing you could do about it. You think I owe YOU an apology? *laughs* If you burst into flames right now, I wouldn't even waste the time to spit on you. Thank you and good day."

[Howard Alan Treesong]

ugh, I didn't realize this was actually being treated as news. FMC

[Bloodwake]

I couldn't even watch ESPN today. Fuck Tiger Woods.

Lol worthy moment of the day: I heard the quote "the world stopped for fifteen minutes to hear Tiger Woods speak. Even the stock exchange in NY."

Plus the fact that he's obviously not sorry for SHIT. After being forced through seeing clips of the speech on EVERY FUCKING CHANNEL KNOWN TO MAN he basically Robocopped his way through the whole fucking thing.

[Himu]

I always love the cliche' "I'm sorry, I don't know what I was thinking" excuse in apologies like this. You knew what you were doin'. You wanted pussy!

[Human Snorenado]

In his defense, pussy is pretty awesome.

[Bloodwake]

In his defense, pussy is pretty awesome.

The man is

-attractive to women
-able to bed any woman in the country and possibly the world

The only mistake he made is to get married. And that's because he just wants to make it look like he is the Blasian Jesus.

[Himu]

In his defense, pussy is pretty awesome.

Hell yeah.

[Phoenix Dark]

It's awesome that public figures are expected to apologize to us for their private transgressions.  I feel so validated "wow, Tiger Woods apologized to me today."

[youtube=560,345][/youtube]

 

[bud]

i totally lost it when he said: ''i'm so sorry.''

[ManaByte]

The Gloria Allred/porn star response to this was

"I quit doing porn for Tiger!"

[Cormacaroni]

It's awesome that public figures are expected to apologize to us for their private transgressions.  I feel so validated "wow, Tiger Woods apologized to me today."

[youtube=560,345][/youtube]

 

Oh come on. That's fun to watch, and a laudable message but it's ultimately an ad manufactured by Nike's bean counters to appeal to a particular demographic after Barkley's image was already set in stone. It's the same sports company that's making Tiger apologize, because they figure it's too late to cast him as a bad boy, and golf doesn't cater to the bad boy demo anyway.

[Stoney Mason]

Oh come on. That's fun to watch, and a laudable message but it's ultimately an ad manufactured by Nike's bean counters to appeal to a particular demographic after Barkley's image was already set in stone. It's the same sports company that's making Tiger apologize, because they figure it's too late to cast him as a bad boy, and golf doesn't cater to the bad boy demo anyway.

Of course. The message is what is important however. Not the rest of it which is simply a shoe company catering to a rebellious image. But the message is right. We'd be a much better society if we had that message being kicked around ad nauseum instead of the current message which is that it matters what our celebrities do in their private lives.

As far as golf catering to the "bad boy" image John Daly was always an extremely popular figure and this scandal will ultimately not effect Tiger's drawing power either. It's just a bunch of nosy people and some guy crafting an image because he thinks that is what he is supposed to do to sell more shit.