Mike Pitts' "Spring Break Zombie Cruise" aka How 3D is Killing Cinema

[The Fake Shemp]

Good piece sent to me by a partner in crime.

When Matt Pitts, a writer on "Fringe" and a former assistant to J.J. Abrams, recently began shopping his first film script to movie studios, he knew he had a marketable idea on his hands. The title of his screenplay, after all, was "Spring Break Zombie Cruise" and its storyline followed, well, just that.

But the prospect of flesh-eating creatures stalking beautiful young bodies wasn't his script's main hook. The element to catch a studio mogul's eye? A plan to shoot the project in 3-D. "In my mind it just added that extra ounce of fun," Pitts says.

Oddly enough, Brad Fuller, the real guy behind Michael Bay's production company that does all those slick horror remakes, sounds like the sensible one in the article.

... that said, part of me is jealous that my spec script won't be as ridiculous as something entitled "Spring Break Zombie Cruise".

[Great Rumbler]

I give 3D another year or two before everyone stops caring.

[The Fake Shemp]

It's here for good, but I wonder how long it'll take for a massive Avatar-sized budget tentpole flick to bomb and send studios running away from this distinguished mentally-challenged "gold rush" to produce everything in 3D.

Ticket prices are also out of control. I caught a matinee the other day and had to do a double take on the price. Oversaturation of the marketplace and rapid inflation of ticket prices in a pretty abysmal economy is a sure fire recipe for a box-office disaster (or two). I still think one of the studios might go under at this rate.

[Cheebs]

I don't think it is going away any time soon. Look at IMAX, 90% of the movies shown in IMAX aren't filmed in IMAX at all. Yet they still push them in the format because it costs more, same will be with 3D.


When you get directors like fucking Martin Scorsese scrapping his period piece drama that was already cast and in pre-production just to jump at the chance to shoot some sci-fi blockbuster that he'd normally never do purely because he wants to use 3D cameras you know this tech is something that is going to stick around.

[Diunx]

I don't see the problem here? an over the top Zombie movie in 3d sounds like a good time.

Cheebs, I don't think that the sci-fi kid movie that Scorsese is filming can be really called a blockbuster, and I think is cool to see him do something completely different to what we are used to see from him.

[Cheebs]

I just hope the novelty of 3D wears off soon and people stop paying extra to see a movie in 3D. Fuck 'em.

People pay double a traditional ticket price to see non-IMAX movies blown up to IMAX proportions and not look much better at all and you think they will stop paying more for 3D? Not gonna happen.

[ManaByte]

IRON MAN 2 is in 2D

No 3D at all.

[Solo]

They wanted to restrict its odor to two dimensions.

[The Fake Shemp]

People pay double a traditional ticket price to see non-IMAX movies blown up to IMAX proportions and not look much better at all and you think they will stop paying more for 3D? Not gonna happen.

Yes. If 3D is pushed as a gimmick, which is clearly is right now, with shake-and-bake conversions that are poorly implemented late in post, then that desire to see something in 3D is going to fade fast.

Especially with rising ticket and the inevitable oversaturation of the marketplace. The film industry is just pushing the theater industry closer to its death with this type of move, which is typical of its brain trust; overreaching to catch up with the market, and only thinking in the short-term.

[The Fake Shemp]

IMAX doesn't represent a large percentage of the box-office take for your average film, and is more or less separate from the general theater experience. It doesn't really compete for regular theater patrons. It's no different than specialty theaters that serve alcohol and food or drive-in theaters.

That's not the case for 3D films.

[The Fake Shemp]

Further proof that 3D sucks:

Alien prequel will be shot in 3D.

[The Dark Shake 3000]

I have yet to see a 3D presentation of a film that actually added any depth (not that kind of depth) to the proceedings. Hence why I'm still convinced it's an unfortunate gimmick.

[The Fake Shemp]

Not true. Cameron's compelling 3D presentation did cleverly mask the fact that Avatar was a pretty mediocre film.

[The Dark Shake 3000]

He made the backgrounds look more detailed

I love how that's become a selling point for films. Detailed backgrounds. You would think we're talking about fucking video games.

[The Fake Shemp]

I both hate it and love it. I hate what it is doing to Hollywood at the moment, but I love its long term consequences. I still believe this gold rush will lead to one of the studios going under; the current model is unsustainable. Driving up production costs and hinging your entire revenue stream on one or two tentpole flicks is going to backfire when you price your audience out of theaters.

If this recession continues, and consumer electronics prices continue to plummet, I could easily see people opting for the regular or 3D version of a Blu-ray in their own house rather than pay $15 - $18 per ticket at the theater. And if everything is in 3D, people are going to be a bit more discretionary on what they spend their money on - meaning less repeat viewers and less viewers, period.

The studios were already facing this dilemma prior to the emergence of 3D technology, and now they're only going to accelerate it by inflating ticket prices and oversaturating the market.

[Cheebs]

Further proof that 3D sucks:

Alien prequel will be shot in 3D.

See this is the one movie I am kind of ok with. It's being shot by Ridley Scott. A lot of his movies tend to be empty but they tend to be really pretty looking. He knows how to make a movie look really good, if there is anyone who can make 3D look good it's him even if the movie is pretty meh.

I trust him with 3D over Martin Scorsese despite the fact Martin Scorsese is the far superior director, it just seems like something Scott will handle better.

[The Dark Shake 3000]

Also I at people who keep acting like 3-D is a "new and exciting" concept. C'mon, folks. Know your basic facts.

[Cheebs]

My local art house had Dial M For Murder in 3D like a year ago. 

[The Dark Shake 3000]

Was it better than Avatar?

[brawndolicious]

I haven't seen any legitimate use for 3D outside of Coraline and that wasn't out of some humongous artistic goals other than the novelty of seeing claymation in 3D.

[The Fake Shemp]

To be fair, the 3D technology that is all the rage right now is relatively new and exciting for moviegoers. Avatar was the first 3D presentation of its kind that most people have ever seen - despite the technology being around for awhile.

In Hollywood talk, "new and exciting" means "what people are buying right now".

Clash of the Titans might have been a bigger catalyst than Avatar, because there was a likely box-office bomb that was salvaged by its 3D marketing.

[The Dark Shake 3000]

The technology mainly allows for more ease of use when shooting mo-cap. I still don't see much difference between the way Cameron used 3-D and the way your average schlock horror film does it. Instead of knives and tits coming at you, the backgrounds just looked deeper. It still didn't serve the actual mechanics of the film in any memorable way.

[Cheebs]

Shake did you shed a tear when Scorsese said every movie should be shot in 3D, saying Precious would have been better in 3D?

[The Dark Shake 3000]

You've asked me this like thirty times.

And no. Marty can do whatever he wants, especially this late in the game. In fact he may even be able to use 3-D in a way that doesn't make it feel like a cheap gimmick, but I wouldn't put my chips on it.

[The Fake Shemp]

I want to see the first 3D Oscar bait film. What's Paul Haggis doing?

[The Dark Shake 3000]

Being a renegade on the lamb from crazy scientologists

[Bloodwake]

I'm going to laugh when people YET AGAIN don't give a fuck about 3D. And Federman's right, the damn market will not support such a price hike in ticket prices.

THIS IS A VERY BAD IDEA. IT'S FAILED AT LEAST TWICE BEFORE. QUIT BEING distinguished mentally-challenged HOLLYWOOD.

[Eric P]

here's a high concept for you

"my mommy is a zombie"

a boy's mother comes back as the living dead and the boy tries to have a normal relationship with it, but it all goes horribly wrong.

it's a metaphor for divorce and moral equivalency

and it's a kid's movie

[The Dark Shake 3000]

Being distinguished mentally-challenged all the way to the bank

[Cheebs]

I want to see the first 3D Oscar bait film. What's Paul Haggis doing?

Paul Haggis wrote your favorite movie of all time, Quantum of Solace.

[brawndolicious]

what gimmick will Cameron have to salvage a decade from now is the question?  Pokemon cards with your ticket?  Or even a digital Avatarmon on your smartphone?  A premium on the ticket price so you can see your little tentacle rape beastiality buddy enjoy the movie with you?  Adding to the adventure and sense of wonder?

If this shit doesn't die quick like Willco says, I fully expect the gimmicks to get a lot fucking worse.

[The Dark Shake 3000]

The audience will send texts at various moments throughout the movie to determine the final outcome. All for the low, low price of $55.50 per ticket.

[The Fake Shemp]

Paul Haggis wrote your favorite movie of all time, Quantum of Solace.

That would be true if it was my favorite movie of all-time and he was the only writer on it!

[Solo]

Oh the future irony when Feder's first screenplay gets turned into a 3D movie

[Cheebs]

Whatever they are doing it has worked. The home video market has plummeted while theatrical films $$ have been skyrocketing these past few years.

[The Dark Shake 3000]

Oh the future irony when Feder's first screenplay gets turned into a 3D movie

Fart Police in 3-D and Smell-O-Vision?

[The Fake Shemp]

Oh the future irony when Feder's first screenplay gets turned into a 3D movie

I already called someone today and told them that I needed a few days to rework the entire thing for 3D.

Whatever they are doing it has worked. The home video market has plummeted while theatrical films $$ have been skyrocketing these past few years.

This really isn't true. Growth in the home video market has declined, but that's because DVD has pretty much saturated the market and BD is still priced out of a lot of people's homes. Like I said, once the prices drop, that'll shift.

Theatrical revenue is not sustainable. The ticket prices are going up faster than people's incomes.

It's precisely this kind of short term thinking that fuels this kind of stupidity. It will only hurt the industry.

[The Dark Shake 3000]

Studios sacrificing the long-term for some quick cash. Nothing new.

[Great Rumbler]

Oh the future irony when Feder's first screenplay gets turned into a 3D movie

It's already a foregone conclusion that Candyland will be filmed in 3D.

[The Fake Shemp]

Candyland 2 will be in 4D.

spoiler (click to show/hide)

Taste is the fourth dimension

[close]

[Cheebs]

This really isn't true. Growth in the home video market has declined, but that's because DVD has pretty much saturated the market and BD is still priced out of a lot of people's homes. Like I said, once the prices drop, that'll shift.

Theatrical revenue is not sustainable. The ticket prices are going up faster than people's incomes.

It's precisely this kind of short term thinking that fuels this kind of stupidity. It will only hurt the industry.

Do you think Blu-Ray will take over the home video market or be just a in-between thing from DVD to digital downloads ala laser disk was for vhs to dvd?

[Eric P]

here's a high concept for you

"my mommy is a zombie"

a boy's mother comes back as the living dead and the boy tries to have a normal relationship with it, but it all goes horribly wrong.

it's a metaphor for divorce and moral equivalency

and it's a kid's movie

So its kinda like Pet Sematary 2?

yes

[The Fake Shemp]

This really isn't true. Growth in the home video market has declined, but that's because DVD has pretty much saturated the market and BD is still priced out of a lot of people's homes. Like I said, once the prices drop, that'll shift.

Theatrical revenue is not sustainable. The ticket prices are going up faster than people's incomes.

It's precisely this kind of short term thinking that fuels this kind of stupidity. It will only hurt the industry.

Do you think Blu-Ray will take over the home video market or be just a in-between thing from DVD to digital downloads ala laser disk was for vhs to dvd?

I think it will be a stopgap, but not as irrelevant as Laserdisc. Streaming is where it's at. Once the studios aren't afraid of it.

[HyperZoneWasAwesome]

the press release for Big Tits Zombie will probably be better then the movie itself.

Dear My Friends,

Are you already bored with the movies about girls in school uniforms swinging their weapons around? What? Ninja? Geisha girls? No, no, that's all way too old fashioned. But the waiting is over as we present an incredibly Japanese style of movie. And look, if you're bored with watching recent mass‐produced erotica and those grotesque movies, we are offering a new challenge, something awesome! Yes, 3D!

Our new movie is about pretty girls with big tits and zombies and it's in 3D! It will be absolutely the best movie you have ever seen. No mistake. It's a violent, action movie full of taboos. It's up to you to watch it or not. Are you ready?

You'll be convulsed with laughter at this previously unthinkable storyline brought to you by TMC&CONCEPT FILM CO, LTD. It's based on the notorious comic book "Big Tits Dragon" which was banned from most stores. They said it would be impossible to put that story on the big screen but we did! And, as a special treat, our new movie "Big Tits Zombie" is in 3D (anaglyph method)! Yes, exactly as you imagine, big tits will pop up right in front of your face! Meanwhile, the hideous zombies will close in on and fight against the scantily‐dressed girls.

[STORY]

BIG TITS ZOMBIE in 3D!!!
Deadly DD‐Cups!!!
A bloody Armageddon has begun!


Rena Jodo (Sola Aoi) is a stripper who just got back from Mexico and she has been offered a gig at a hot spring resort. When she arrives, she finds a deserted country town. There's hardly anyone in the audience at the strip club and all the other strippers, including Ginko (Risa Kasumi), Maria (Mari Sakurai), Nene (Tamayo) and Dana (Io Aikawa) are all bored stiff. They don't know what to do with their time and they are on the verge of fighting each other.

When they decide to go down to the basement of the club to kill time, Maria finds a "Book of the Dead" near "the Well of the Spirit." But who could have imagined the horror and panic that find would bring? Maria's reading of the book out loud has somehow revived the dead and zombies start appearing all over the world attacking mankind. It's Hell in the real world!

Dana and Nene are bitten by the zombies and they turn into living dead who attack Rena and Ginko. The poor big‐bosomed babes have no choice but to fight against Maria who now rules the zombies and tries to establish a kingdom of zombies. Rena and Ginko have to challenge Maria and the hordes of zombies! And how does the Blue Demon Devil (Minoru Torihada) fit in?

Charming Sola Aoi who has a splendid figure (bust: 35 inches/ waist: 23 inches/ Hip: 33 inches) is the star of the film. Sola has a baby face and a dynamite body. Her unbalanced attractions made her a big star in the world of adult videos and recently she started appearing in films and TV dramas. She is not only popular in Japan but also in other Asian countries, especially Taiwan, where she is nicknamed "Baby Face Big Tits." Sola has been welcomed passionately every time she has visited Asian countries. In fact, so many fans and mass media rushed to the airport to see her that her arrival itself became headline news.

[Phoenix Dark]

I give 3D another year or two before everyone stops caring.

like the Wii?

[Ichirou]

Sora Aoi is a major porn actress. That's kind of a big deal.

[Cormacaroni]

I don't think it is going away any time soon. Look at IMAX, 90% of the movies shown in IMAX aren't filmed in IMAX at all. Yet they still push them in the format because it costs more, same will be with 3D.


When you get directors like fucking Martin Scorsese scrapping his period piece drama that was already cast and in pre-production just to jump at the chance to shoot some sci-fi blockbuster that he'd normally never do purely because he wants to use 3D cameras you know this tech is something that is going to stick around.

Or you think: Marty took the cash.

[Cheebs]

I don't think it is going away any time soon. Look at IMAX, 90% of the movies shown in IMAX aren't filmed in IMAX at all. Yet they still push them in the format because it costs more, same will be with 3D.


When you get directors like fucking Martin Scorsese scrapping his period piece drama that was already cast and in pre-production just to jump at the chance to shoot some sci-fi blockbuster that he'd normally never do purely because he wants to use 3D cameras you know this tech is something that is going to stick around.

Or you think: Marty took the cash.

He has been ranting for the past year how much he wants to do 3D, so that is probably the key factor. For someone who can do any movie he wants more so than most working directors I really doubt the higher pay check on Hugo Cabaret over Silence was the main reason. He isn't that type of director who does director-for-hire stuff for the $$$.

[The Dark Shake 3000]

I'm pretty pissed that Marty delayed Silence to shoot this fucking kid's movie instead. Silence sounded like it could have been pretty fucking great.

[GilloD]

Idea for a 3D art film: A Holocaust movie in which all the Jews are in 3D, but everything else is in 2D. It's about the plague of racial/religious persecution! I AM MAKING A STATEMENT!

[The Fake Shemp]

My first film will be in DIGITAL 2D. That's pushing the boundaries!

[Ichirou]

He's been talking about making Silence for over ten years.  That shit's never going to happen at this rate.