Duke Nukem Forever - the Thread

[Eel O'Brian]

and by the end of the game, after saving the world, he'd really BE that guy, with women falling all over him and kids wanting autographs and guys having homoerotic fantasies about him - but the joke would be that he'd start seeing things as they were at the beginning of the game, like the chicks just want to fuck him so they can release a ppv sex vid and make money or the kid wants to sell the autographed photo on ebay - the realization that once you reach the top, there's nowhere to go but down

[AdmiralViscen]

yeah I'm gonna collect all the ego shit before I do insane. I want to keep dying to a bare minimum. Those damn load screens. TBH that is the only problem I had with the game.

I don't even mind the load screens. I don't die that often. The problem is that you take a shitton of damage in a hurry, so if you aren't dying then you are huddled in a corner, blind, every two seconds like it's Killzone 2. That's not Duke Nukem. I'm thinking I'm just gonna knock down the difficulty and just blitz the game, go for the incidental cheevs and move on.

[AdmiralViscen]

Now I'm in a construction yard. I have to travel across a suspended cargo container to get to another set of scaffolding. I shoot the barrels in it to clear the way. i go in. Checkpoint. I cannot walk through the container. 2/3rds through it there is an invisible wall that I cannot walk through. So I have to load the fucking checkpoint to pass through.

I do so, there is a room with a blinking orange thing and a rocket launcher. I go to the blinking thing first. Oops a space ship immediately appears and blows me off the platform before I get the rocket launcher, so now I have no way to destroy the space ship, so now I have to reload the fucking checkpoint again.

Again I ask what 'smoothing over' was done after 3DR stopped working on this.

That fight is also the second one in this level that requires you to keep running to an ammo refill crate that is right out in the open and causes you to lose all your health and have to go hide like a bitch again. How about you give me more than 5 rockets at a time like in Duke 3D?

Back in 10 minutes, now I get to figure out where to plug in this stupid fucking battery so I can fight 3 more guys and then face another puzzle.

[SantaC]

they should fix up and release the 2001 version

Isn't the general consensus that the 2001 version never actually existed?

according to the wired inside 3DR article, the devs were ready to complete DNF after the 2001 trailer, but Broussard said no.

[demi]

Viscen, you should be playing Bulletstorm with me, thats what you should be doing

[AdmiralViscen]

True, you are right about that.

Bulletstorm is Duke Nukem

[demi]

Ok this part with the rotating platform and all the octopus is abysmal... what in god's name


edit: Ok I'm an idiot, didnt know you could climb back up

[AdmiralViscen]

Is it easier to do that 50,000 Anarchy points cheev with more people? I might have one or two people later who can help.

[demi]

Yes, but it's completely doable with 2

[demi]

holy shit this stairs bit with the barrels flying down at you so horribad who thought this was a good idea oh my god what

edit: Ok, had to use a beer (an actual use for the thing)

[demi]

wow, the final boss is distinguished mentally-challenged easy... cmon now. lmfao

[AdmiralViscen]

How many hours of game is left after the queen bitch level?

[demi]

A lot left

[iconoclast]

Don't worry Bebpo, I played Borderlands in co-op and the game's still boring. Co-op doesn't really change anything aside from adding more enemies who have more health. Grind some more.

[Bebpo]

yeah I'm gonna collect all the ego shit before I do insane. I want to keep dying to a bare minimum. Those damn load screens. TBH that is the only problem I had with the game.

I don't even mind the load screens. I don't die that often. The problem is that you take a shitton of damage in a hurry, so if you aren't dying then you are huddled in a corner, blind, every two seconds like it's Killzone 2. That's not Duke Nukem. I'm thinking I'm just gonna knock down the difficulty and just blitz the game, go for the incidental cheevs and move on.

I don't think the difficulties mean much.  I'm playing on the lowest difficulty and you still drop to 1 hit until death when you get hit once and have to hide and regen or drink beer beforehand.  It's really really shitty damage balancing.  I don't get who thinks this is fun.  Feels more like trying to extend game length by making it so people can't just blow through it.  Which is balls.

[The Sceneman]

sounds like someone doesn't have BALLS OF STEEL.

I've been off the Xbox for a few days but I'ma jump on soon and collect Ego boosts and the other incidental cheevs. Then it's Insane time.

[chronovore]

Any chance of you being the first to 1000 it still? Or has your interest there waned?

[The Sceneman]

lol, a bazillion people have 1000'ed the game already. I wont even be the first on the Bore if demi goes for it  I just don't have the balls to play a game non-stop for 24 hours when it gets released

[chronovore]

You're overestimating the number of copies sold, as well as the number of surviving fanboys.

then they can release whatever video footage of the 2001 version exists as a kinect game

That would be appropriate. It was just a video of set pieces, so you can play the .wmv on your xbox, and pretend to play while the Kinect pretends to accept your input.

[The Sceneman]

alright I maxed out my ego and have 49 of 50 cheevs unlocked. Starting my Insane run now.

[Shuri]

The GhostTown level is how the game should had been. The action was super intense, tons of cool firefights while using the scenery, finding ammo and bombs inside the old houses.. This kind of non-stop action is what the entire game needed.

[The Sceneman]

up to Vegas in Ruin on Insane. Insane is pretty rough. The beserk piggies are very good at killing you.

[demi]

I'm at Duke Burger on Insane. I'm gonna finish it today.

[The Sceneman]

I was having a little trouble on Insane but I'm making pretty steady progress really. It's not too bad compared to CoD Veteran or something

[Bebpo]

I'm at the part where you are operating a crane after putting the battery in.  Where am I supposed to be moving the crane to so that I can climb it and get somewhere new?

[demi]

You bang it against the wall.

[The Sceneman]

"Have a taste of my ball"

[demi]

btw... 1000'd earlier today. woop.

now playing red faction armageddon. picked it up for a twenty. woop.

[The Sceneman]

nice! I'm pretty busy with schoolwork atm so wont beat Insane for awhile. I'll probably get 1000 sometime in the current week. I hope they dont add any BS multi cheevs via dlc.

[Bebpo]

This aliens parody section is annoying because it's too dark too see without duke vision but then the light sources like the rolling balls make it so you can't see with duke vision. 

[demi]

aliens parody?? you have played Duke3D right?

[Bebpo]

A long long time ago?  Were there chest bursters popping out of naked chicks in that?  I don't remember.

[demi]

Not in 2D graphics, but they were tied to alien poles and moaned and stuff just the same.

[The Sceneman]

This aliens parody section is annoying because it's too dark too see without duke vision but then the light sources like the rolling balls make it so you can't see with duke vision. 

[Bebpo]

Bitch, I play 1 fps a year.  I am like your grandpa playing fps.  I don't understand these bang bang shoot shoot games and their wacky game design.

[demi]

FPS don't have a "End Turn" button

[Bebpo]

Finished the duke burger, at the GRAW section.  Game surprisingly isn't that bad.  Maybe it's because I don't play FPS much so I'm no FPS expert, but most of the time FPS games fall into 2 categories: AAA great and classic titles like Half-life, Halo, Bioshock, Crysis and then 7-8/10ish titles that are fun but have a lot of annoying parts due to balance or just the game being obtuse on letting the player know what they should do.  DNF doesn't feel any worse than Resistance 2, FEAR, CoD3, Doom3, Quake 4, or any of the other b-tier fps games where you run through a bunch of set pieces and shoot a bunch of dudes.

Then again I thought Bioshock 2 was great and everyone said it sucks, so I guess I just have low standards for FPS and unless they are dog shit like Resistance 2 I'm not really going to hate them.  I enjoying fighting off the enemy waves using the duke weapons and items and the locations are silly but decent.  Some dumb game design decisions but nothing game breaking, just annoying for a section here and there.  So far I'd give the game like a 7.5 or something.

The air hockey controls though...WOW, how did they think that was shippable.

[Herr Mafflard]

Why don't you play more fps games if you generally like most of them?

[SantaC]

so no holoduke?

[demi]

Yes there's holoduke...

[The Sceneman]

up to Duke Burger on Insane. Insane is actually easier than hard because of the large health bar. Difference is enemies take more bullets to take down

[AdmiralViscen]

Finished the duke burger, at the GRAW section.  Game surprisingly isn't that bad.  Maybe it's because I don't play FPS much so I'm no FPS expert, but most of the time FPS games fall into 2 categories: AAA great and classic titles like Half-life, Halo, Bioshock, Crysis and then 7-8/10ish titles that are fun but have a lot of annoying parts due to balance or just the game being obtuse on letting the player know what they should do.  DNF doesn't feel any worse than Resistance 2, FEAR, CoD3, Doom3, Quake 4, or any of the other b-tier fps games where you run through a bunch of set pieces and shoot a bunch of dudes.

Then again I thought Bioshock 2 was great and everyone said it sucks, so I guess I just have low standards for FPS and unless they are dog shit like Resistance 2 I'm not really going to hate them.  I enjoying fighting off the enemy waves using the duke weapons and items and the locations are silly but decent.  Some dumb game design decisions but nothing game breaking, just annoying for a section here and there.  So far I'd give the game like a 7.5 or something.

The air hockey controls though...WOW, how did they think that was shippable.

I'd say it's a bit under the B-tier, in the Dark Sector sort of area where you should get it for $15 or so. If it weren't for the glitches and bad pacing it'd be better.

[The Sceneman]

Oh man I just remembered, last time I played Duke said "I'm going to kill you Old Style", which is a reference to the Ventrilo harassment clip. Brilliant.

I just came up with one of my own: Duke sees an alien crawling through an air duct: "Get out of the vent, or I'll have you bent."

[chronovore]

Bitch, I play 1 fps a year.  I am like your grandpa playing fps.  I don't understand these bang bang shoot shoot games and their wacky game design.

:dap

[cool breeze]

honestly, the demo was pretty decent.  I thought it would be offensively bad like The Conduit or something based on impressions.  I dunno.  I have a bad history of thinking shooters are alright based on demos.  Things like Pariah, Unreal 2, Haze all seemed competent based on the demos.  I never played the full games, but still.

[The Sceneman]

I am SO CLOSE to beating the game on Insane, but I'm finding it hard to slog through this again when I'm also playing the incredible Nuts & Bolts. I've listed my copy of Duke on Trademe so I've got a clock of 1 week, which should give me the push to 1000

[Bebpo]

The Duke Truck driving part that went on forever with all the gas tanks was pretty bad.  At the dam now. 

So far, areas I liked:
-Construction area
-Duke Burger
-Strip Joint
-Casino was ok

Areas I didn't like:
-Hive
-Duke Truck

The boss fight on the Dam was pretty good.  How much is left in the game?  I just went inside the Dam at around 5 hours.

[demi]

A bit more

[Bebpo]

Cool.  I like these games that are ~6-8 hours.  They don't outstay their welcome.

[demi]

As long as the Octaking doesnt piss you off...

[Bebpo]

So this is going to be another one of those games where the final boss is total bullshit?

[demi]

The complete opposite

[Herr Mafflard]

the only thing that pissed me off boss-wise in this was the Queen Bitch. When you get her health down, her giant flashing claw-hand flops on the side near you. So naturally I'm thinking I got do something with it. Cue me running up to it seeing if there was a context sensitive action button i needed to press, or maybe try to damage it when it was flashing -- none of that worked. So after I died like five times, I head over to youtube to see what I'm missing, and d'ya know what? I needed to run up to the damn thing head and press a button. I'm like I didn't even know I could reach that ledge fuuuuuu....

After that cathartic battle, I realised I wasn't playing any old crap shooter. I was playing a crap shooter from 8 years ago. Apart from that, the game was piss easy. The last battle was joke, though perhaps that was fitting.

Postscript: I gotta say I enjoyed jumping about as shrunken Duke in the kitchen area the most. It reminded me of jumping about the kitchen map in CounterStrike. So the best bit of this game for me was when it made me recall a previous gaming memory from a different game ages ago. Feels like the whole time playing it the game was telling me "Hey, look at all these other games we're riffing on, d'ya gettit?", reminding me that I'd rather be playing those other games.

[Bebpo]

I liked the Kitchen platforming and the part where you had to lure the big guys into the shrink things and then kill them when small.  Also enjoyed stepping on the guys when you were large.

I didn't care for the shrink section in the casino where they got lazy and made you go through the area shrunk, then turn around and go back through it again normal size.  Boring re-use.

Probably my favorite bit of combat was when you were in the trailer in the construction yard and fighting enemies through the windows before they tip it over and you have to fight face to face.

[The Sceneman]

theres some neat easter eggs in the kitchen section, if you stop to read the cans/jars lying around they often have some quite funny shit written on them.

eg. on tin of beans "airbriush your shorts with our heinous beans. you'll be splitting crowds in no time when your mud blowing bubble butt sends out a crescendo of brown notes"

lol

[The Sceneman]

anyhow my copy is listed on TradeMe now so I've got ONE WEEK to 1000 it. I should be able to finish Insane tonight "if I try"

[Bebpo]

Finished it.

Honestly, I guess I just am easy reviewer for FPS because I thought it was fine.  I enjoyed the combat and the last few hours of the game had lots of good combat with a solid variety in level design.  I think the monster truck section sucks and the hive section is hard to see (I actually wish they ditched DUKE VISION completely and just made the game light enough to freaking see the whole time), but that's only about 1/4th the game and the other 3/4ths were enjoyable B-tier fps.  It's one of those games you can pick up for $10-20 and play over a weekend and have some fun.  Has some good extras too after you beat the game.

Now that being said, I tried the multiplayer for a half hour and holy crap was that terrible.  I dunno if it was because of the lag or because the second you spawn you get 1 hit shott'd to death all the time, but it was really really bad.  Also controlled terribly.  And I did the map where they tried to remake the first level from Duke3d and while that's cute, it just showed how much worse this MP plays.

Also after watching all the trailers from DNF over the years, it seems like every version up until 2003 was way more awesome than the game we got.  Just the scenarios look far more involved, varied, and exciting.  DNF is less of a bad game, and rather just a disappointment that it didn't live up to any of the trailers in the slightest.  It's a 7/10ish FPS, and not total shit or anything outside a few sections and the MP, but the history of it demanded a better game.

I'd still play another Duke game (which I'm sure they'll make since the sales of DNF are going to be huge) but it'd have to be much, much, muuuuch better than this.

[The Sceneman]

a very fair review. Just calling the game outright shit (which a lot of people are doing) is pretty inaccurate

[AdmiralViscen]

You sure this game is selling huge? It debuted at number 20 in the XBL most played list.

[The Sceneman]

That list accounts for xbl multiplayer only I think. The majority of people that bought DNF wouldnt have picked it up for the multiplayer.