you ever wonder while taking a shit...

[TakingBackSunday]

...that the smell is so horrible that it clings to every fiber of your clothes and you will smell of shit all day?

that's why I shit naked

[Van Cruncheon]

i WAS wondering what folks did before toilet paper

i know they used their hand or corn cobs or whatever when plopping into a hole or a river or a chamber pot BUT uggggggh

seriously, if anybody asks me what the single most civilizing invention is, i will say: toilet paper

[Great Rumbler]

i WAS wondering what folks did before toilet paper

i know they used their hand or corn cobs or whatever when plopping into a hole or a river or a chamber pot BUT uggggggh

seriously, if anybody asks me what the single most civilizing invention is, i will say: toilet paper

What, you don't have servants take care of that for you?

[TakingBackSunday]

I wish america had those...what do you call them again?  Those separate toilet like things that send a stream of water up your crack to clean it.  shit would feel so good

[TakingBackSunday]

yeah those rock

[Himu]

Van: apparently the rich bought reading material strictly for the use of wiping one's bum hole after a good shit. Probably why reading on the toilet is still common place today. They'd tear pages out of a cheap ass book, wipe their ass with it and toss it.

[Brehvolution]

No, cause my shit don't stink.

[Himu]

I also think Himu is confusing the SEARS catalog with something he made up.  

I got it from this:

English lords, in attempting to teach their sons to be cultivated gentlemen, often advised purchasing an inexpensive volume of verse for use in the loo. The idea, of course, was that while you were sitting there in a contemplative state you would be able to read a few stanzas, subsequent to which the paper could be put to other ends, so to speak. It has not escaped my notice that my magnum opus, The Straight Dope: A Compendium of Human Knowledge, is also well suited for this purpose. Indeed, in the next edition we are thinking about perforating the pages, for maximum convenience.

http://www.straightdope.com/columns/read/572/what-did-people-use-before-toilet-paper-was-invented

[Cravis]

THE THREE SEA SHELLS

[Robo]

What, you don't know how to use the three seashells? 

[Phoenix Dark]

Worst thing I've ever done in my life: one time I had to get rid of a huge turd in my gut asap so I ran to the bathroom and shat it out; felt good man. At that point I realized there was no toilet paper so I figured damn alright, I can just open the door and the closet is to my left. I walked bowlegged and didn't see anything. Then I figured fuck it, I can get some paper towel from the kitchen. Walked bowlegged downstairs and there was no paper towel.

I wound up having to rip pages out of my notebook and wipe my ass. First wipe was a disaster, the shit found a way through the paper just enough for my hand to feel the moisture. Few hard wipes later I was done; I put the paper in a bag and threw it in the trash outside.

The next day my ass felt like it was on fire. Wound up giving my ass a couple paper cuts which ruined my entire month

[TEEEPO]

should've just jumped in the shower brah bro

[Phoenix Dark]

This isn't Japan, TEEPO. There are rules

[Robo]

An Egyptian friend of mine never uses toilet paper unless he's forced to.  At home, he jumps in the tub and splashes water up on his anus. 

TP is for barbarian infidels. 

[Himu]

[bud]

...that the smell is so horrible that it clings to every fiber of your clothes and you will smell of shit all day?

that's why I shit naked

this has happened to me before. i now put some tp between my legs so that the scent doesn't directly gets into my shirt. shitting while just wearing a short really does feel liberating.

[Olivia Wilde Homo]

I too like to shit naked.

I also wet the toilet paper when wiping my ass.  Uses a lot less TP that way.

[cool breeze]

Baby wipes are where its at.  Some of the companies repackage them for adults, but the general idea is using a wet wipe to clean your poo.  Gives you a fresh feeling.

As for what people did before toilet paper, my grandparents use a flowering pot or something.  Old people + pouring water at odd angles + poo = GRAB THE MOP! OH FUCK IT'S LEAVING THE BATHROOM.

[MCD]

[drew]

my toilet is right next to the sink so i dont need to use baby wipes

[chronovore]

I pay attention to what I eat, so my shit smells like cinnamon.

yeah those rock

They really really do.

Yup, they are pretty awesome. It's nice that they're pretty much de rigueur in Japan. Every time I have to use a toilet in the US which only has paper, I feel like I'm only half clean.