Author Topic: They changed my Zodiac. How am I going to know my fortune now? (Read 2077 times)

Groogrux · « **on:** January 13, 2011, 04:50:51 PM »

13th zodiac sign: Why astrology is even sillier than we thought

Astrologists have devised that the zodiac signs that were made for us 2,000 years ago no longer apply today because of the shift in the Earth's axis.

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Thanks to Earth's wobble, astrological signs are, well, bunk. (Or even more bunk than you might expect.) Astrological signs are determined by the position of the sun relative to certain constellations on a person's day of birth. The problem is, the positions were determined more than 2,000 years ago. Nowadays, the stars have shifted in the night sky so much that horoscope signs are nearly a month off.

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Capricorn: Jan. 20-Feb. 16.

Aquarius: Feb. 16-March 11.

Pisces: March 11-April 18.

Aries: April 18-May 13.

Taurus: May 13-June 21.

Gemini: June 21-July 20.

Cancer: July 20-Aug. 10.

Leo: Aug. 10-Sept. 16.

Virgo: Sept. 16-Oct. 30.

Libra: Oct. 30-Nov. 23.

Scorpio: Nov. 23-29.

Ophiuchus: Nov. 29-Dec. 17.

Sagittarius: Dec. 17-Jan. 20.

Yesterday, I was a diplomatic, peaceful, and idealistic Libra. Today I'm an analytical, observant, and helpful Virgo. This shit has ruined my day.

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Mupepe · « **Reply #1 on:** January 13, 2011, 04:52:51 PM »

yeah i'm a fucking cancer now

Great Rumbler · « **Reply #2 on:** January 13, 2011, 04:53:06 PM »

Oh what the heck now I'm a Ophiuchus? What the heck is an Ophiuchus anyway?!

Brehvolution · « **Reply #3 on:** January 13, 2011, 04:54:20 PM »

This is bullshit! Fuck you stars!

Until the next earth shift, Aquarius. :'(

Diunx · « **Reply #4 on:** January 13, 2011, 04:54:58 PM »

I wish I had know this when I was a kid I could have been the awesome Camus of aquarious instead of the homo Afrodita of pisces :'(

cool breeze · « **Reply #5 on:** January 13, 2011, 04:57:00 PM »

Quote

Aries is considered a "masculine"
...
Pisces is considered a "feminine"

:'(

Mr. Gundam · « **Reply #6 on:** January 13, 2011, 04:58:05 PM »

I'm still a Leo, but just barely...

CajoleJuice · « **Reply #7 on:** January 13, 2011, 05:11:54 PM »

Taurus -> Aries

SOMEONE TELL ME WHAT THIS MEANS OMGGDDGG

Positive Touch · « **Reply #8 on:** January 13, 2011, 05:19:50 PM »

IT MEANS YOU ARE THE NEW GOD OF WAR

Robo · « **Reply #9 on:** January 13, 2011, 05:23:25 PM »

Isn't this story just a hyperventilated case of half-assed journalism not acknowledging that there are several different schools of thought regarding what determines your astrological sign?

AFIAK, the school more popular in the west is based on the seasons and the date ranges don't change.

Also, your sign is relative to your birth, so even as the date ranges change, your astrological sign doesn't (because that is stupid). If you really give a damn, you'll need to look up the ranges for your birth year.

Himu · « **Reply #10 on:** January 13, 2011, 05:28:23 PM »

Went from scorpio to virgo. wtf

demi · « **Reply #11 on:** January 13, 2011, 05:29:15 PM »

You dont need a zodiac to tell you that you're fat and poor.

pilonv1 · « **Reply #12 on:** January 13, 2011, 05:51:48 PM »

Quote from: Linkzg on January 13, 2011, 04:57:00 PM

Quote
Aries is considered a "masculine"
...
Pisces is considered a "feminine"

:'(

same here

Cormacaroni · « **Reply #13 on:** January 13, 2011, 05:55:57 PM »

Awesome, upgraded from Virgo to Leo

me

lordmaji · « **Reply #14 on:** January 13, 2011, 07:12:31 PM »

wow, I went from being a Scorpio to being a Virgo. What a shift.

Corporal · « **Reply #15 on:** January 13, 2011, 09:01:46 PM »

Nooo I don't wanna be a stupid fish.

I shall ignore this with all my might.

We ought to build a machine to undo the axis shift. Considerable chance to wipe out all life, you say? Eh. Worth the risk.

Arbys Roast Beef Sandwich · « **Reply #16 on:** January 13, 2011, 09:11:27 PM »

Quote from: Linkzg on January 13, 2011, 04:57:00 PM

Quote
Aries is considered a "masculine"
...
Pisces is considered a "feminine"

:'(

ffffffuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu

Howard Alan Treesong · « **Reply #17 on:** January 13, 2011, 09:45:19 PM »

Quote from: Wrath2X on January 13, 2011, 05:43:38 PM

Still a virgo

you misspelled vir--

Akala · « **Reply #18 on:** January 13, 2011, 10:00:39 PM »

they have no authority to do this. this is like the vatican saying "god's ways were different 2000 years ago" and coming up with another character.

demi · « **Reply #19 on:** January 13, 2011, 10:08:21 PM »

I wonder if new zodiac puzzles will included this Optomitron character lol

Akala · « **Reply #20 on:** January 13, 2011, 10:19:00 PM »

haha no way.

FatalT · « **Reply #21 on:** January 13, 2011, 11:04:20 PM »

The new Zodiac signs only apply to newborns. You're all still your same shit.

Rman · « **Reply #22 on:** January 13, 2011, 11:59:37 PM »

Quote from: FatalT on January 13, 2011, 11:04:20 PM

The new Zodiac signs only apply to newborns. You're all still your same shit.

Wrong. The astrological charts were based on the axial progression from 2500 years ago. Did the Sun's axis just suddenly shift a few months ago? It's been happening this whole time.

Forget it. Why I'm trying to argue about such BS garbage as astrology. It's funny seeing people freak out on FB, though.

FatalT · « **Reply #23 on:** January 14, 2011, 01:24:27 AM »

Quote from: Rman on January 13, 2011, 11:59:37 PM

Quote from: FatalT on January 13, 2011, 11:04:20 PM
The new Zodiac signs only apply to newborns. You're all still your same shit.
Wrong. The astrological charts were based on the axial progression from 2500 years ago. Did the Sun's axis just suddenly shift a few months ago? It's been happening this whole time.

Forget it. Why I'm trying to argue about such BS garbage as astrology. It's funny seeing people freak out on FB, though.

BlueTsunami · « **Reply #24 on:** January 14, 2011, 01:29:07 AM »

Quote from: Rman on January 13, 2011, 11:59:37 PM

Quote from: FatalT on January 13, 2011, 11:04:20 PM
The new Zodiac signs only apply to newborns. You're all still your same shit.
Forget it. Why I'm trying to argue about such BS garbage as astrology. It's funny seeing people freak out on FB, though.

Bu but, how am I gonna find a good man with inaccurate astrological information. Oh lawd Jesus :himu

Shaka Khan · « **Reply #25 on:** January 14, 2011, 09:41:45 AM »

Quote from: CajoleJuice on January 13, 2011, 05:11:54 PM

Taurus -> Aries

SOMEONE TELL ME WHAT THIS MEANS OMGGDDGG

High five. Taurus fucking sucked.

Robo · « **Reply #26 on:** January 14, 2011, 10:53:56 AM »

Quote from: Spencer on January 14, 2011, 10:43:34 AM

You guys realize this isn't really true or new information anyway. It's just a different set of zodiac. The western zodiac is based on the equinox.

The people demand new twitter/facebook trends and they will have them whether they makes sense or not, damn it.

Don Flamenco · « **Reply #27 on:** January 14, 2011, 11:14:13 AM »

i'm a taurus now instead of a gemini. This just throws my confirmation bias all into whack.

MCD · « **Reply #28 on:** January 14, 2011, 12:42:12 PM »

Ophiuchus now.

My whole life was a lie.

FatalT · « **Reply #29 on:** January 14, 2011, 12:52:01 PM »

http://news.blogs.cnn.com/2011/01/13/no-your-zodiac-sign-hasnt-changed/

Herp derp.

Great Rumbler · « **Reply #30 on:** January 14, 2011, 01:32:44 PM »

Quote from: FatalT on January 14, 2011, 12:52:01 PM

http://news.blogs.cnn.com/2011/01/13/no-your-zodiac-sign-hasnt-changed/

Herp derp.

>implying that anyone in this thread actually cares

Shaka Khan · « **Reply #31 on:** January 14, 2011, 01:36:40 PM »

But I really wanted to become Mu :'(

Raban · « **Reply #32 on:** January 14, 2011, 01:37:45 PM »

Sick I'm aquarius now.

drew · « **Reply #33 on:** January 14, 2011, 01:47:13 PM »

Quote from: Great Rumbler on January 13, 2011, 04:53:06 PM

Oh what the heck now I'm a Ophiuchus? What the heck is an Ophiuchus anyway?!

welcome to the winners circle, now start acting like it

magus · « **Reply #34 on:** January 14, 2011, 01:53:34 PM »

still taurus

Joe Molotov · « **Reply #35 on:** January 14, 2011, 05:02:44 PM »

Quote from: BlueTsunami on January 14, 2011, 01:29:07 AM

Quote from: Rman on January 13, 2011, 11:59:37 PM
Quote from: FatalT on January 13, 2011, 11:04:20 PM
The new Zodiac signs only apply to newborns. You're all still your same shit.
Forget it. Why I'm trying to argue about such BS garbage as astrology. It's funny seeing people freak out on FB, though.

Bu but, how am I gonna find a good man with inaccurate astrological information. Oh lawd Jesus :himu

Don't touch if you ain't prayed!

Groogrux · « **Reply #36 on:** January 14, 2011, 06:29:54 PM »

Quote from: Spencer on January 14, 2011, 03:11:33 PM

Quote from: FatalT on January 14, 2011, 12:52:01 PM
http://news.blogs.cnn.com/2011/01/13/no-your-zodiac-sign-hasnt-changed/

Herp derp.

Yeah I tried that, they ignored it because OMG NEW ZODIAC

We don't need ya'lls scientifery make sensory quit-bein'-stupidiy bullshit! Fool me once...

spoiler (click to show/hide)

I never expected it to take off like this...

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Great Rumbler · « **Reply #37 on:** January 14, 2011, 06:55:24 PM »

Quote from: Spencer on January 14, 2011, 03:11:33 PM

Quote from: FatalT on January 14, 2011, 12:52:01 PM
http://news.blogs.cnn.com/2011/01/13/no-your-zodiac-sign-hasnt-changed/

Herp derp.

Yeah I tried that, they ignored it because OMG NEW ZODIAC

It's more fun to act upset.

lennedsay · « **Reply #38 on:** January 15, 2011, 12:19:20 AM »

Bubububut I'm the epitome of a pisces!!

This is me right now:
[youtube=560,345][/youtube]

Great Rumbler · « **Reply #39 on:** January 15, 2011, 12:46:05 AM »

Quote from: lennedsay on January 15, 2011, 12:19:20 AM

[youtube=560,345][/youtube]

News:

Author Topic: They changed my Zodiac. How am I going to know my fortune now? (Read 2077 times)