Author Topic: Should I feel bad about starting an affair? (Read 3878 times)

CurseoftheGods · « **on:** July 17, 2011, 07:03:04 PM »

So... I just had sex with a married man (with a 14-yo to boot). It was at his place, and his family was out of town. I was shocked when he first told me he was married and had kids, but I never thought much of it until now. If I said no, he'd still be having sex with men on the side... and in no way am I jeopardizing his marriage even if this turns out to be more serious.

Uh... thoughts? Am I a psychopath?

Akala · « **Reply #1 on:** July 17, 2011, 07:24:15 PM »

Closeted married folk always make me laff. Fuck him. Oh wait

Vertigo · « **Reply #2 on:** July 17, 2011, 07:59:28 PM »

It's a bit dodgy knowing he is living life as a 'straight' man. I find that incredibly deceptive.

But that's on his conscious not yours.

Van Cruncheon · « **Reply #3 on:** July 17, 2011, 08:12:45 PM »

his life, his consequences

Diunx · « **Reply #4 on:** July 17, 2011, 08:41:24 PM »

lol you used the same excuse George used.

Seinfeld

demi · « **Reply #5 on:** July 17, 2011, 08:41:44 PM »

MARRIAGE

What a joke.

Was he woof material? btw, you probably arent the first guy who fucked his cornhole. dont worry about it.

EmCeeGrammar · « **Reply #6 on:** July 17, 2011, 08:42:41 PM »

You should feel what you feel. Nothing otherwise. For instance, I feel that you're a homewrecker. The sex being gay doesn't alter that.

recursivelyenumerable · « **Reply #7 on:** July 17, 2011, 08:49:59 PM »

I only had time to skim the OP and not read it thoroughly, but in general having an affair with a 14-year-old is rarely a good idea, although if he's already married maybe he must be mature for his age, I dunno.

EmCeeGrammar · « **Reply #8 on:** July 17, 2011, 08:51:53 PM »

Quote from: AWESOM-O on July 17, 2011, 08:48:02 PM

I fucked a married chick in Thailand once. It's not really a thing.

Yes, knowing your history you would do a thing like that and think its nothing.

I'm no prude, and aint that empathetic either, but I'd rather not enable behavior that could potentially scar a family or otherwise.

lennedsay · « **Reply #9 on:** July 17, 2011, 09:03:27 PM »

Quote from: Wrath2X on July 17, 2011, 08:46:08 PM

Well he's the one who's going to get fucked in the end, its your choice whether to continue with the affair or not. He's the one cheating and living a closeted life that will ruin the family if revealed, you're just a guy who was looking for dick. Chillax.

What if Curse is the bottom?

Mupepe · « **Reply #10 on:** July 17, 2011, 09:07:21 PM »

Awesome-o who are you on GAF?

Madrun Badrun · « **Reply #11 on:** July 17, 2011, 09:42:09 PM »

Joe Molotov · « **Reply #12 on:** July 17, 2011, 10:09:07 PM »

It's gonna suck when the 14 y/o comes home early one afternoon and sees his dad getting cornholed.

T234 · « **Reply #13 on:** July 17, 2011, 10:10:54 PM »

I have a feeling it's the other way around, Molotov.

pilonv1 · « **Reply #14 on:** July 17, 2011, 10:15:30 PM »

Quote from: Joe Molotov® EDGE™ on July 17, 2011, 10:09:07 PM

It's gonna suck when the 14 y/o comes home early one afternoon and sees his dad getting cornholed.

or is it

Diunx · « **Reply #15 on:** July 17, 2011, 10:15:43 PM »

Quote from: Mupepe on July 17, 2011, 09:07:21 PM

Awesome-o who are you on GAF?

Puddles.

BlackMage · « **Reply #16 on:** July 18, 2011, 01:57:28 AM »

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #17 on:** July 18, 2011, 02:06:13 AM »

more details. how did you meet this dude...

Trent Dole · « **Reply #18 on:** July 18, 2011, 03:24:12 AM »

Quote from: recursivelyenumerable on July 17, 2011, 08:49:59 PM

I only had time to skim the OP and not read it thoroughly, but in general having an affair with a 14-year-old is rarely a good idea, although if he's already married maybe he must be mature for his age, I dunno.

CurseoftheGods · « **Reply #19 on:** July 18, 2011, 05:48:47 AM »

Quote from: demi on July 17, 2011, 08:41:44 PM

MARRIAGE

What a joke.

Was he woof material? btw, you probably arent the first guy who fucked his cornhole. dont worry about it.

He was a daddy bear.

Quote from: Phoenix Dark on July 18, 2011, 02:06:13 AM

more details. how did you meet this dude...

http://www.grindr.com/Grindr_iPhone_App/Grindr_-Meet_Guys_Near_You_on_your_iPhone.html

Trurl · « **Reply #20 on:** July 18, 2011, 06:10:05 AM »

What's the age difference between you guys?

CurseoftheGods · « **Reply #21 on:** July 18, 2011, 06:31:06 AM »

Quote from: Trurl on July 18, 2011, 06:10:05 AM

What's the age difference between you guys?

I'm almost 25 and he's 38.

Cerveza mas fina · « **Reply #22 on:** July 18, 2011, 07:03:34 AM »

Unless you know his family somehow I´d say it´s cool.

Quote from: EmCeeGrammar on July 17, 2011, 08:51:53 PM

Yes, knowing your history you would do a thing like that and think its nothing.

I'm no prude, and aint that empathetic either, but I'd rather not enable behavior that could potentially scar a family or otherwise.

Get over yourself Emcee.

@Awesome-o: best new old member

EmCeeGrammar · « **Reply #23 on:** July 18, 2011, 08:49:31 AM »

You are arguably the best example of why one shouldn't be sleeping around with people that are spoken for. Was it fun hiding from that one spurned dude. Hmmmmm?

CurseoftheGods · « **Reply #24 on:** July 18, 2011, 09:00:15 AM »

Quote from: AWESOM-O on July 18, 2011, 06:27:12 AM

Quote from: Trurl on July 18, 2011, 06:10:05 AM
What's the age difference between you guys?

Curse is 24, this dude is 14 and also married.

Wait. How do you know my age?

demi · « **Reply #25 on:** July 18, 2011, 09:19:49 AM »

It's clear you're a chaser, what age bracket would that fall under. The cool young dude bracket.

Mupepe · « **Reply #26 on:** July 18, 2011, 10:08:31 AM »

There's nothing wrong with it from your end if it doesn't actually make you feel bad.

rodi · « **Reply #27 on:** July 18, 2011, 10:52:48 AM »

It's kind of wrong, but what isn't these days?

Don Flamenco · « **Reply #28 on:** July 18, 2011, 11:14:11 AM »

nope, nothing wrong with that. I can see how it might appear very morally gray, whether you should screw a married guy or not. But nope, it's totally alright.

Madrun Badrun · « **Reply #29 on:** July 18, 2011, 11:47:31 AM »

You say morally gray, I say morally gay.

Cerveza mas fina · « **Reply #30 on:** July 18, 2011, 01:47:37 PM »

Seeing FM make intentional wordplays is like seeing a kid play with fire.

Himu · « **Reply #31 on:** July 18, 2011, 01:59:04 PM »

Quote from: CurseoftheGods on July 18, 2011, 05:48:47 AM

http://www.grindr.com/Grindr_iPhone_App/Grindr_-Meet_Guys_Near_You_on_your_iPhone.html

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #32 on:** July 18, 2011, 02:06:54 PM »

Quote from: Stringer Bell on July 18, 2011, 01:59:04 PM

Quote from: CurseoftheGods on July 18, 2011, 05:48:47 AM
http://www.grindr.com/Grindr_iPhone_App/Grindr_-Meet_Guys_Near_You_on_your_iPhone.html

yea...my thoughts exactly. jesus

I pray it was safe sex right

Mupepe · « **Reply #33 on:** July 18, 2011, 02:52:44 PM »

Quote from: AWESOM-O on July 18, 2011, 02:45:01 PM

Quote from: Mupepe on July 18, 2011, 10:08:31 AM
There's nothing wrong with it from your end if it doesn't actually make you feel bad.

That probably has a lot to do with which end he is and how big the other guy's end is.

Nah, I bet both ends feel good, man.

Reb · « **Reply #34 on:** July 18, 2011, 02:54:33 PM »

Yes, you should feel bad.

Robo · « **Reply #35 on:** July 18, 2011, 02:55:07 PM »

No, you should not feel bad.

Reb · « **Reply #36 on:** July 18, 2011, 02:56:44 PM »

Yes you should.

Robo · « **Reply #37 on:** July 18, 2011, 02:57:37 PM »

No you shouldn't.

Reb · « **Reply #38 on:** July 18, 2011, 02:59:40 PM »

You really should.

demi · « **Reply #39 on:** July 18, 2011, 03:00:35 PM »

He didnt start the affair, though. So no, he shouldn't feel bad. If the guy is on Grindr, then chances are he fucked and sucked plenty of other tween boys.

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #40 on:** July 18, 2011, 03:32:01 PM »

never heard of it until today. Do women use it too...?

demi · « **Reply #41 on:** July 18, 2011, 03:33:56 PM »

Read the site, maurice.

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #42 on:** July 18, 2011, 03:36:01 PM »

Mupepe · « **Reply #43 on:** July 18, 2011, 03:50:27 PM »

just use craigslist, PD.

Himu · « **Reply #44 on:** July 18, 2011, 03:51:05 PM »

Don't use craigslist, cops are using that.

Mupepe · « **Reply #45 on:** July 18, 2011, 03:53:04 PM »

? he's not trying to find a prostitute. There's nothing illegal about hooking up from the internet.

Himu · « **Reply #46 on:** July 18, 2011, 03:55:19 PM »

he's not?

Mupepe · « **Reply #47 on:** July 18, 2011, 03:57:46 PM »

i thought he was just trying to find horny sluts

Himu · « **Reply #48 on:** July 18, 2011, 04:01:45 PM »

PD if you get with a horny slut do not eat her out or let her suck your dick (without a condom on).

Cerveza mas fina · « **Reply #49 on:** July 18, 2011, 04:09:07 PM »

Gay men have it easy. It really isn't fair.

Bildi · « **Reply #50 on:** July 18, 2011, 07:28:14 PM »

Quote from: CurseoftheGods on July 17, 2011, 07:03:04 PM

If I said no, he'd still be having sex with men on the side...

Sorry Curse, but I think that's a rubbish argument. It reminds me of an argument I sometimes encounter which is "if I didn't screw all those people over for their life savings, someone else would have." Doesn't change the fact that the person ruined people's lives for their own gain.

Whether you are happy with your decision is up to your own conscience.

Barry Egan · « **Reply #51 on:** July 18, 2011, 07:57:59 PM »

I wonder the extent to which coming from a broken home effects the type of opinion you'd have about this. I come from one, for instance, and I think curse should def feel like shit.

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #52 on:** July 18, 2011, 08:06:43 PM »

Cheating is wrong, but the husband cheated not Curse. Seems like a bad, desperate decision regardless

Mupepe · « **Reply #53 on:** July 18, 2011, 08:23:14 PM »

I come from a broken home as well and I would definitely feel bad about fucking with a marriage. And I tend to have a harsher view on infidelity in marriage than most people I know.

But to clarify with my earlier comment, I don't think he did anything wrong. I'd feel bad because I know how that feels, but it's ultimately not really his fault.

etiolate · « **Reply #54 on:** July 18, 2011, 10:15:17 PM »

Though you didn't start the affair, you are a part of something that will likely hurt someone else.

cool breeze · « **Reply #55 on:** July 18, 2011, 10:41:13 PM »

there are too many people out there to be messing with a married one

CrystalGemini · « **Reply #56 on:** July 18, 2011, 11:25:56 PM »

It's like knowingly buying stolen goods.

Madrun Badrun · « **Reply #57 on:** July 19, 2011, 01:17:34 AM »

Quote from: CrystalGemini on July 18, 2011, 11:25:56 PM

It's like knowingly buying stolen goods.

It's more like going to a strangers home and sticking their tooth brush in your anus just because that person's roomate says it's ok.

CurseoftheGods · « **Reply #58 on:** July 19, 2011, 10:52:08 AM »

Quote from: Bildi on July 18, 2011, 07:28:14 PM

Quote from: CurseoftheGods on July 17, 2011, 07:03:04 PM
If I said no, he'd still be having sex with men on the side...

Sorry Curse, but I think that's a rubbish argument. It reminds me of an argument I sometimes encounter which is "if I didn't screw all those people over for their life savings, someone else would have." Doesn't change the fact that the person ruined people's lives for their own gain.

I agree. I wasn't thinking very clearly when I wrote that.

As for the more recent posts, I come from a broken home as well, but I don't think it's affecting how I feel about this situation. Regardless, I would feel like a more ethical person if I broke it off, and I think I will.

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #59 on:** July 19, 2011, 10:55:03 AM »

safe sex?

News:

Author Topic: Should I feel bad about starting an affair? (Read 3878 times)