Author Topic: Taking a shit at work. (Read 5779 times)

Cerveza mas fina · « **on:** September 06, 2011, 04:33:00 AM »

I think I take one every day, lately ive been only using the disabled toilet cause its nice, big and I dont hear other people shit and fart. Its also cleaner.

Taking a nice poo break beats smoking imho...

Narag · « **Reply #1 on:** September 06, 2011, 05:46:12 AM »

I schedule mine around work such that I'm getting paid to take a shit. If you do something well don't do it for free.

Barry Egan · « **Reply #2 on:** September 06, 2011, 06:35:17 AM »

In before himumu.

OptimoPeach · « **Reply #3 on:** September 06, 2011, 06:38:20 AM »

Sometimes I walk in and the stall door is shut but I don't see any feet and I wonder if there is a person on the toilet holding their legs up so no one can identify them by their shoes

My personal favorite is when I'm on the can and someone walks in, does a 180, and is already out the door again before it even shuts

The Sceneman · « **Reply #4 on:** September 06, 2011, 07:15:26 AM »

When I worked, I shat once a day. I often timed it to be at the same time as the woman I liked. I loved hearing her butt flaps fart and shit out all the contents of her asshole

Vizzys · « **Reply #5 on:** September 06, 2011, 07:26:32 AM »

Cerveza mas fina · « **Reply #6 on:** September 06, 2011, 07:33:02 AM »

I feel like going now... my stomach is stirring...

demi · « **Reply #7 on:** September 06, 2011, 08:01:16 AM »

Quote from: OptimoPeach on September 06, 2011, 06:38:20 AM

My personal favorite is when I'm on the can and someone walks in, does a 180, and is already out the door again before it even shuts

I do this, because our bathroom is not a spot you want to be in with another person. It's like a closet. Plus I get stage fright when someone else is nearby. I just want my privacy ;_;

Cerveza mas fina · « **Reply #8 on:** September 06, 2011, 08:29:51 AM »

Stand in line?

MrAngryFace · « **Reply #9 on:** September 06, 2011, 10:01:56 AM »

I really try not to unless I know that no one else is in the bathroom- which is rare since the building is pretty big

Cerveza mas fina · « **Reply #10 on:** September 06, 2011, 10:17:12 AM »

I imagine you have this face on the shitter

Joe Molotov · « **Reply #11 on:** September 06, 2011, 10:24:47 AM »

Quote from: Borys on September 06, 2011, 08:13:10 AM

45 men, 2 women.

1 can in men's toilet, 2 cans in women's toilet.

Guess where I go.

Sink?

tiesto · « **Reply #12 on:** September 06, 2011, 10:27:23 AM »

This building is a former factory now converted to offices, so there are a ton of huge bathrooms (for when all the line workers were on their breaks) scattered all throughout the building... I like to mix up the bathrooms i take the dump in for variety...

Brehvolution · « **Reply #13 on:** September 06, 2011, 10:34:17 AM »

60 men, 2 pots

So when I have to go and walk in and find an empty stall, I'm all

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #14 on:** September 06, 2011, 11:52:46 AM »

The worst thing is seeing someone walk out the stall then head out the restroom door without washing their hands. Then having to shake their hand later in the day :'(

fistfulofmetal · « **Reply #15 on:** September 06, 2011, 12:03:41 PM »

never

MrAngryFace · « **Reply #16 on:** September 06, 2011, 12:11:25 PM »

Quote from: Premium Lager on September 06, 2011, 10:17:12 AM

I imagine you have this face on the shitter

Yeah I dont really enjoy taking a dump.

Eel O'Brian · « **Reply #17 on:** September 06, 2011, 12:14:50 PM »

Quote from: Borys on September 06, 2011, 08:13:10 AM

45 men, 2 women.

1 can in men's toilet, 2 cans in women's toilet.

Guess where I go.

trashcan by your desk?

Diunx · « **Reply #18 on:** September 06, 2011, 12:31:01 PM »

Quote from: OptimoPeach on September 06, 2011, 06:38:20 AM

Sometimes I walk in and the stall door is shut but I don't see any feet and I wonder if there is a person on the toilet holding their legs up so no one can identify them by their shoes

My personal favorite is when I'm on the can and someone walks in, does a 180, and is already out the door again before it even shuts

The stall door of my office bathroom goes all the way to the floor and it's closed most of the time so I guess I would have to knock if I ever wanted to take a shit there.

Joe Molotov · « **Reply #19 on:** September 06, 2011, 12:36:31 PM »

I have my own private bathroom in my office.

spoiler (click to show/hide)

I have to clean it.

[close]

Diunx · « **Reply #20 on:** September 06, 2011, 12:43:41 PM »

The american dream

Rman · « **Reply #21 on:** September 06, 2011, 01:14:24 PM »

Of course. I'm there most of my waking hours.

Positive Touch · « **Reply #22 on:** September 06, 2011, 05:46:32 PM »

Quote from: Phoenix Dark on September 06, 2011, 11:52:46 AM

The worst thing is seeing someone walk out the stall then head out the restroom door without washing their hands. Then having to shake their hand later in the day :'(

FUCK that. i sooner slap a bottle of hand sanitizer in their hand than reach out and grab it

MrAngryFace · « **Reply #23 on:** September 06, 2011, 05:48:20 PM »

I think what weirds me out at work is how people piss on TOP of the urinal...I mean I kinda get lazy floor drippers- but you gotta work at that other one or be freakishly tall

Yeti · « **Reply #24 on:** September 06, 2011, 07:48:00 PM »

Maybe they're trying to pee with an erection?

BobFromPikeCreek · « **Reply #25 on:** September 06, 2011, 07:54:12 PM »

pooping at work

trying to pee with a boner

spindashing · « **Reply #26 on:** September 06, 2011, 08:12:43 PM »

it must be against the law to shit in public.

One time, I remember in school a few months ago I went to the bathroom and it reeked. I heard some dude make straining noises so I didn't know whether I should have started laughing or vomited because the smell was so rank. Or laughed while vomited.

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #27 on:** September 06, 2011, 10:12:36 PM »

Man, shitting at school is horrible.It boils down to "open stall #1, see water all over floor; open stall #2, see note paper and shit in toilet; open stall #3, see urine on seat; open handicap stall, sit down and pray no cripples wheel in"

Diunx · « **Reply #28 on:** September 06, 2011, 10:18:28 PM »

I have shitted twice at school this year already, my personal record.

muckhole · « **Reply #29 on:** September 07, 2011, 07:41:00 AM »

Sometimes, living where you work is a blessing.

Groogrux · « **Reply #30 on:** September 07, 2011, 08:35:14 AM »

Private restrooms where I used to work. FTW

drozmight · « **Reply #31 on:** September 08, 2011, 08:25:16 AM »

Every day soon after my morning coffee.

Should really stop drinking coffee.

The Sceneman · « **Reply #32 on:** September 08, 2011, 10:08:40 AM »

Quote from: Spencer on September 06, 2011, 11:33:22 AM

I'm postin in this thread while taking a shit at work.

fake

Ganhyun · « **Reply #33 on:** September 08, 2011, 05:42:43 PM »

I have before. Its interesting when your in there and someone else comes in and realizes that someone is already shitting, then they kinda sit in their stall and wait for you to finish before starting themselves.

Robo · « **Reply #34 on:** September 08, 2011, 05:54:13 PM »

Taking a shit at work should be the first and last thing you do at a job; the exit shit being nowhere near the bowl.

lennedsay · « **Reply #35 on:** September 08, 2011, 07:36:19 PM »

Some lady came into the bathroom today while I was in the stall. Most people go to the end stalls to drop dueceskys and reserve the first few stalls for pees. Oh no, not this lady. 1st stall. Then it sounded like a bubbling fish aquarium as she proceeded to piss out of her ass.

I almost squeezed one out to try and compete, but there was no way.

Groogrux · « **Reply #36 on:** September 08, 2011, 07:59:45 PM »

Quote from: lennedsay on September 08, 2011, 07:36:19 PM

Some lady came into the bathroom today while I was in the stall. Most people go to the end stalls to drop dueceskys and reserve the first few stalls for pees. Oh no, not this lady. 1st stall. Then it sounded like a bubbling fish aquarium as she proceeded to piss out of her ass.

I almost squeezed one out to try and compete, but there was no way.

spoiler (click to show/hide)

[close]

chronovore · « **Reply #37 on:** September 09, 2011, 09:51:43 PM »

We work on the top floor of a 16 story building. There are about 70 men working on my floor, but there is a single men's room, with 1 western-style toilet (with washlet!) and 1 eastern-style squatter.

About two hours after lunch, everyone has the same urge, and it becomes an increasingly uncomfortable dash to get to an open head. I can't use those damned squatters. When the 16F toilet is occupied, I have to use the stairs and go to 15F. If the 15F toilet is occupied, I usually call the elevator and take it to 3F, because it's largely unoccupied by other businesses, and the toilets are empty.

But sometimes it's taken, too.

In those cases, it's back to the stairs, and a dash for the 2F single stall, or the one on the first floor. By this point, it's a race against the clock, and in my head the theme for Mission Impossible is playing really, really loudly.

Groogrux · « **Reply #38 on:** September 09, 2011, 11:02:34 PM »

I don't get it. What's the difference in the toilets? Americabore for the lose.

Joe Molotov · « **Reply #39 on:** September 09, 2011, 11:13:50 PM »

I went to my private restroom today and dropped off a massive load. Read some Evilbore and checked my email on my iPhone while I was in there. Considered fapping, but ultimately decided against it. I wished I had my razor with me, I forgot to shave this morning and I was getting a bit scraggly. I need to keep an extra one up there.

chronovore · « **Reply #40 on:** September 10, 2011, 10:27:00 PM »

Quote from: andrwfields on September 09, 2011, 11:02:34 PM

I don't get it. What's the difference in the toilets? Americabore for the lose.

Squatter: Japanese people generally use these with no problem. They drop trou, squat and poop, somehow keeping balanced with their pants bunched up just below their knees. I don't have the squatting flexibility to perform this act.

Japanese FUTCHAR TOILET with washlet. Where the squatter is a remnant of a simpler time of shitting over a hole in the ground, these are in contrast a message of butt-washing love from the future, where no-one suffers from scraping feces from their rectum with a shabby strip of paper. That tube is showing how much pressure the nozzle can deliver to obliterate any straggling, offensive and uncooperative bits of used food.

Our men's room has one of each. Guess which I prefer!

T234 · « **Reply #41 on:** September 10, 2011, 10:32:43 PM »

I hovered when I took shits at the porn store.

Dickie Dee · « **Reply #42 on:** September 10, 2011, 11:06:28 PM »

Quote from: chronovore on September 10, 2011, 10:27:00 PM

Quote from: andrwfields on September 09, 2011, 11:02:34 PM
I don't get it. What's the difference in the toilets? Americabore for the lose.

(Image removed from quote.)
Squatter: Japanese people generally use these with no problem. They drop trou, squat and poop, somehow keeping balanced with their pants bunched up just below their knees. I don't have the squatting flexibility to perform this act.

[IMG]http://i.imgur.com/KoUjK.jpg[img]
Japanese FUTCHAR TOILET with washlet. Where the squatter is a remnant of a simpler time of shitting over a hole in the ground, these are in contrast a message of butt-washing love from the future, where no-one suffers from scraping feces from their rectum with a shabby strip of paper. That tube is showing how much pressure the nozzle can deliver to obliterate any straggling, offensive and uncooperative bits of used food.

Our men's room has one of each. Guess which I prefer!

Squatting is apparently the better way to shat as your poop chute is proper aligned for optimial poopage. Sitting up kinks things up.

Eel O'Brian · « **Reply #43 on:** September 10, 2011, 11:08:14 PM »

yeah but if you slip you might end up sitting in your own shit

chronovore · « **Reply #44 on:** September 10, 2011, 11:42:10 PM »

I've heard it, and from having seen the occasional animal pooping, it does seem that's what nature intends. However, I can't manage the pose since I haven't been doing it since birth.

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #45 on:** September 11, 2011, 12:07:26 AM »

I'd probably sit on the pipe

Joe Molotov · « **Reply #46 on:** September 11, 2011, 02:21:19 AM »

Quote from: chronovore on September 10, 2011, 11:42:10 PM

I've heard it, and from having seen the occasional animal pooping, it does seem that's what nature intends. However, I can't manage the pose since I haven't been doing it since birth.

We've spent the past few thousand years saying "fuck you" to nature, I don't see any reason to stop now.

Robo · « **Reply #47 on:** September 12, 2011, 12:35:31 PM »

Quote from: Joe Molotov® EDGE™ on September 11, 2011, 02:21:19 AM

Quote from: chronovore on September 10, 2011, 11:42:10 PM
I've heard it, and from having seen the occasional animal pooping, it does seem that's what nature intends. However, I can't manage the pose since I haven't been doing it since birth.

We've spent the past few thousand years saying "fuck you" to nature, I don't see any reason to stop now.

Words to live by.

demi · « **Reply #48 on:** September 12, 2011, 01:37:16 PM »

Quote from: Joe Molotov® EDGE™ on September 09, 2011, 11:13:50 PM

I went to my private restroom today and dropped off a massive load. Read some Evilbore and checked my email on my iPhone while I was in there. Considered fapping, but ultimately decided against it. I wished I had my razor with me, I forgot to shave this morning and I was getting a bit scraggly. I need to keep an extra one up there.

This is really, really, hot. My boy is becoming a man.

Grow a beard out and post a pic, Joe. I want to see you at your woofiness.

Dickie Dee · « **Reply #49 on:** September 13, 2011, 03:46:56 PM »

One of the things I love about our new building is that the men's shitters have fully enclosed doors like you're going into a closet.

I continually fantacize about the things I could accomplish while in there.

Dickie Dee · « **Reply #50 on:** September 13, 2011, 04:06:04 PM »

It really seems like one of those "good in theory" things. Maybe it cleans your ass better but I'd bet it just ends up in a wet ass.

Dickie Dee · « **Reply #51 on:** September 13, 2011, 04:36:11 PM »

I DON'T EVEN KNOW, THAT'S THE PROBLEM

IT'S TOPSY-TURVING ONE OF MY FEW LIFE CONSTANTS

Diunx · « **Reply #52 on:** September 13, 2011, 04:41:51 PM »

Can some euro gaf give us boritos from the americas instructions on how to use one of these fabled bidets?

chronovore · « **Reply #53 on:** September 14, 2011, 10:55:17 AM »

The Japanese ones, you use the bidet, then you wipe. But as it's been pointed out, if you are playing in mud, and you just wipe it on a towel, you've got a filthy towel and filthy hands afterwards. If you run your muddy hands through water, and then use a towel, you've probably got cleaner hands and towel.

Mupepe · « **Reply #54 on:** September 14, 2011, 11:19:37 AM »

Quote from: lennedsay on September 08, 2011, 07:36:19 PM

Some lady came into the bathroom today while I was in the stall. Most people go to the end stalls to drop dueceskys and reserve the first few stalls for pees. Oh no, not this lady. 1st stall. Then it sounded like a bubbling fish aquarium as she proceeded to piss out of her ass.

I almost squeezed one out to try and compete, but there was no way.

for some reason this post makes me love you more

i just took a good 'un at work. I try to pull two-a-days because on average they're about 15 minutes (5 minutes of actual pooping and wiping and 10 minutes of NSFW phone browsing) so that's 30 minutes of paid break time!!!! Yeahhhhhhhh

I wanna up my fiber and eventually do four-a-days for an even hour

Mupepe · « **Reply #55 on:** September 14, 2011, 04:54:14 PM »

Mine hasn't gotten here yet and I only have an hour left. I'm getting worried I won't get an extra 15 minutes today.

lennedsay · « **Reply #56 on:** September 14, 2011, 08:14:04 PM »

Quote from: Spencer on September 14, 2011, 04:52:37 PM

Afternoon poo, checkin in

Also,

Mups

Barry Egan · « **Reply #57 on:** September 14, 2011, 09:52:45 PM »

Quote from: Mamacint on September 13, 2011, 04:06:04 PM

It really seems like one of those "good in theory" things. Maybe it cleans your ass better but I'd bet it just ends up in a wet ass.

Think about it like this. If a bird took a shit on your arm, would you scrape it off with some paper, or would you rinse it off in the sink? Bidets are very effective and takes way less time.

lennedsay · « **Reply #58 on:** September 14, 2011, 11:27:36 PM »

Toilet paper cleans off as much as it rubs in.

Diunx · « **Reply #59 on:** September 14, 2011, 11:49:57 PM »

I don't care about having a dirty asshole, since I'm not a dirty gay I just use it to shit.

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Author Topic: Taking a shit at work. (Read 5779 times)