Author Topic: Let's read The Bible  (Read 12906 times)

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Himu

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Re: Let's read The Bible
« Reply #180 on: December 23, 2011, 04:36:05 PM »
Ah, so this is the same logic the KKK used before rounding up my ancestors for a good ol' hangin'? And the same logic the slave masters used to justify enslaving people with dark complexion?
IYKYK

Himu

  • Senior Member
Re: Let's read The Bible
« Reply #181 on: December 23, 2011, 04:39:27 PM »
But see, because our skin is brown, we're cursed. Why would you want to be cursed?
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Flannel Boy

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Re: Let's read The Bible
« Reply #182 on: December 23, 2011, 04:39:43 PM »
Ah, so this is the same logic the KKK used before rounding up my ancestors for a good ol' hangin'?
It's more ex post facto.

Flannel Boy

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Re: Let's read The Bible
« Reply #183 on: December 23, 2011, 04:40:14 PM »
But see, because our skin is brown, we're cursed. Why would you want to be cursed?

You wish you were brown.

Flannel Boy

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Re: Let's read The Bible
« Reply #184 on: December 23, 2011, 04:41:58 PM »
Cause I rather be damned

You haven't been to hell yet,  but you have been to Montana.

Himu

  • Senior Member
Re: Let's read The Bible
« Reply #185 on: December 23, 2011, 04:43:05 PM »
Hell > Montana

Hell sounds like one helluva party.
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Flannel Boy

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Re: Let's read The Bible
« Reply #186 on: December 23, 2011, 04:45:13 PM »

Himu

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Re: Let's read The Bible
« Reply #187 on: December 23, 2011, 04:45:57 PM »
:patel
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Flannel Boy

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Re: Let's read The Bible
« Reply #188 on: December 23, 2011, 04:46:30 PM »
That sentence is worse than anything written in the Bible.

Himu

  • Senior Member
Re: Let's read The Bible
« Reply #189 on: December 23, 2011, 04:47:02 PM »
 :lol
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Himu

  • Senior Member
Re: Let's read The Bible
« Reply #190 on: December 23, 2011, 04:48:03 PM »
Okay, so like, does god throw down his rival gods in hell too? I would LOVE to party with Zeus.
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Phoenix Dark

  • I got no game it's just some bitches understand my story
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Re: Let's read The Bible
« Reply #191 on: December 23, 2011, 04:49:23 PM »
I preface this post with  :hans1 as I am no longer religious, but more than a decade in bible school doesn't disappear overnight

7And God made the firmament, and divided the waters which were under the firmament from the waters which were above the firmament: and it was so. 8And God called the firmament Heaven. And the evening and the morning were the second day.
Gen. 1:7-8


And God said, Let there be lights in the firmament of the heaven to divide the day from the night; and let them be for signs, and for seasons, and for days, and years.
Gen. 1:14

Genesis describes a heaven below one area of water, yet above the water on the earth. God decrees this heaven includes the mechanics that control days, nights, years etc: this is clearly talking about space, planets, the sun.

Yet nowhere in the bible is there reference to god residing in this heaven, which must spawn the question: where is god?

And before the throne there was a sea of glass like unto crystal: and in the midst of the throne, and round about the throne, were four beasts full of eyes before and behind.
Revelation 4:6


John sees a large area of frozen water, above which he sees the throne of god. That's two heavens. And Revelations says there is a heaven that is on earth, named the first heaven

Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth, for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and the sea was no more.
Revelation 21:1


The bible clearly says Satan does not roam earth until he is cast out of "heaven" at the start of the tribulation - which means he's not in the first heaven. We know Satan was cast from the throne of god (third heaven) before Genesis, yet has limited access to it in order to troll god basically. We know there's a heaven above the first heaven/earth. At this point it just becomes a logic exercise. Satan is predominantly in the second heaven until god kicks him to earth
010

Himu

  • Senior Member
Re: Let's read The Bible
« Reply #192 on: December 23, 2011, 04:49:40 PM »
I wanna measure Hercules' cock.
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Himu

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Re: Let's read The Bible
« Reply #193 on: December 23, 2011, 04:54:55 PM »
Satan is a dragon like alien who repeatedly tempts humans into sins who told God to go fuck himself?

I'm in love

IYKYK

Himu

  • Senior Member
Re: Let's read The Bible
« Reply #194 on: December 23, 2011, 04:59:46 PM »
What if God and Satan are real but God is the real bad guy and Satan is the good guy?  :o

IYKYK

Himu

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Re: Let's read The Bible
« Reply #195 on: December 23, 2011, 05:01:16 PM »
You're such a school girl, Yazeed.
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Mupepe

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Re: Let's read The Bible
« Reply #196 on: December 24, 2011, 08:48:26 PM »
Well gotdamn Pd you pawned me. If its not too much trouble could you dig up the scriptures about Satan not allowed on earth. I swear ive read something contrary.

Phoenix Dark

  • I got no game it's just some bitches understand my story
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Re: Let's read The Bible
« Reply #197 on: December 24, 2011, 11:57:24 PM »
Well gotdamn Pd you pawned me. If its not too much trouble could you dig up the scriptures about Satan not allowed on earth. I swear ive read something contrary.

Hm looks like I was wrong about Satan having absolutely no access to earth: he is considered the "ruler" of earth despite working in the confines god set for him. He spends most of his time in the second and third heaven where he taunts god, and eventually will be kicked to earth and given full dominion.

    "And war broke out in heaven:  Michael and his angels fought with the dragon; and the dragon and his angels fought, but they did not prevail, nor was a place found for them in heaven any longer.

    "So the great dragon was cast out, that serpent of old, called the Devil and Satan, who deceives the whole world;  he was cast to the earth, and his angels were cast out with him." (Revelation 12:7-9)


010

Himu

  • Senior Member
Re: Let's read The Bible
« Reply #198 on: December 25, 2011, 01:34:05 AM »
I like how Satan apparently deceives people when he was telling Adam and Eve the truth. God told what were babies in men and women's bodies not to eat from a tree for it was sinful. If they were innocent, they wouldn't know what sin or guilt or evil was. Yet he still puts it in the garden of eden and he still tells them not to eat from it, and what happens when you tell a curious baby not to touch something? They're gonna touch it! Not to mention, God is omniscient! If he can know the future, he knew what was going to happen to begin with. So if he did, he is he: 1. mad at Adam and Eve if he knew it was going to happen anyways, and 2. mad at mankind's supposedly sinful abominable life when he was the DIRECT CAUSE OF IT? Is God an IDIOT?

Much more, many modern "moderate" Christians suggest that the Adam and Eve creation myth is just that, a myth, an allegory. But once you've started to dig that hole, you've dug one up for your entire faith. If Adam and Eve is an allegory, what else is allegory? Correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't Jesus' entire existence steeped on the Adam and Eve myth through original sin? Jesus is there to sacrifice himself for that original sin. If Adam and Eve is allegory, that means Jesus sacrificed himself for nothing, because IT DIDN'T HAPPEN, and that raises doubts on Jesus' existence instantly.

The whole thing is a crock of shit no matter how you look at it.
« Last Edit: December 25, 2011, 01:41:05 AM by Stringer Bell »
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Diunx

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Re: Let's read The Bible
« Reply #199 on: December 25, 2011, 12:17:17 PM »
This is amazing :rofl buying this on monday!
Drunk

chronovore

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Re: Let's read The Bible
« Reply #200 on: December 26, 2011, 12:37:57 AM »
This book is amazing.

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 :nsfw :nsfw :nsfw

NSFW thread is over THATAWAY!

(unf unf unf HAWT BRIcK ACTION! :fap :fap :fap )

chronovore

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Re: Let's read The Bible
« Reply #201 on: December 26, 2011, 12:39:17 AM »
Jesus is black,  of course the bible isn't racist.

I love pointing that one out to people who have a big, white Jesus portrait. "Hey, where was Jesus from again? --- and what is the, say, average skin tone of people in that area?"

Momo

  • Nebuchadnezzar
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Re: Let's read The Bible
« Reply #202 on: December 26, 2011, 01:24:57 AM »
Satan is a dragon like alien who repeatedly tempts humans into sins who told God to go fuck himself?

I'm in love

(Image removed from quote.)
Pretty sure those 10 people where being dicks anyway

chronovore

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Re: Let's read The Bible
« Reply #203 on: December 26, 2011, 03:38:15 AM »
Old Testament: Original
New Testament: Retcon
Book of Mormon: Fanfic

So, hey, wait... what is Scientology, then?