Euro-Jank of the Year: Planet Alcatraz

[Great Rumbler]

Planet Alcatraz is a 3D, isometric, party-based, scifi RPG developed by Russians. You play as some chunkhead named Boar, who gets sent to some post-apocalyptic planet called Alcatraz to do something but everything goes wrong and now he's stuck or whatever. The first real mission you get is to kill rats. Everyone speaks with a stilted, hilariously-bad British accent that doesn't match the subtitles. Early on you have to eat potatoes and carrots to restore your health.



Right now you can get it for $5 on Amazon, and then get another 1C Publishing title [like King's Bounty] for free:

http://www.amazon.com/gp/feature.html/ref=amb_link_362756862_4?ie=UTF8&docId=1000716161&pf_rd_m=ATVPDKIKX0DER&pf_rd_s=right-1&pf_rd_r=1MT6PR87N0YTDS39YTQJ&pf_rd_t=101&pf_rd_p=1363305302&pf_rd_i=979455011

It actually came out 2 years ago, but whatever.

[Howard Alan Treesong]

so it's like a Lockdown RPG. SPACE JAIL!

[brob]

recently realized King's Bounty has been made compatible with mac (it showed up in my mac games list, all random like).

It's a good game.

[Great Rumbler]

so it's like a Lockdown RPG. SPACE JAIL!

I guess so! The intro is just a little CG video with no narration. Maybe your guy is a soldier? I don't know! But I do know that there are some rats that needs killing and they're not going to kill themselves.

[Bebpo]

Halfway through do you realize you are a videogame character and break through someone's TV and destroy their universe?

[Great Rumbler]

Halfway through do you realize you are a videogame character and break through someone's TV and destroy their universe?

That would require a level of narrative sophistication that I don't think the Russian development community is capable of, unfortunately.

[Joe Molotov]

Finally out on Steam.

[Great Rumbler]

[Sho Nuff]

omg dat kick animation

[chronovore]

Finally out on Steam.

(Image removed from quote.)

u·nique
yo͞oˈnēk
adjective

• being the only one of its kind; unlike anything else.
  "the situation was unique in modern politics"
  synonyms:   distinctive, distinct, individual, special, idiosyncratic

There is no need for the word "absolutely." It is implied in unique, inherently.

[Joe Molotov]

It's literally mind-blowing!

[chronovore]

http://www.i-mockery.com/halloween/greatest/pics/scanners4.gif