Author Topic: IHOP, or The New Standard in Sub-Shitty  (Read 2591 times)

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Eel O'Brian

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IHOP, or The New Standard in Sub-Shitty
« on: May 29, 2012, 01:35:00 AM »
When did this chain get so awful? I mean, they were never that great to begin with, but I remember them being a notch above the plate full of green apple splatters I was served yesterday morning. How do you fuck up bacon and sausage and eggs and hash browns? They found a way to fuck it ALL, brother. Soggy ass bacon, flaky (!) eggs, chalky (!) hash browns, and sausage links that were evidently sprayed with a thin coating of plastic. The whole wheat pancakes, which our server assured me were DELICIOUS, crumbled like sawdust at the slightest touch. This one had just opened, too, so we had to wait almost half an hour. $25 for this shit, too. You could eat breakfast all week long off $25 worth of groceries. God damn.
sup

Phoenix Dark

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Re: IHOP, or The New Standard in Sub-Shitty
« Reply #1 on: May 29, 2012, 01:51:53 AM »
There was a time when my brothers and I would go to IHOP alot with our dad. Food was great, nice environment, etc. I went there a couple times last year and...wtf? Just very sloppy. To me, breakfast at a restaurant can pretty much go three ways:

1. Good to great.
2. That...processed taste. It's not bad, it just takes so...bland like it's missing something important. Like you ordered pancakes, then the restaurant ordered the pancakes from some robot and served them to you
3. Sloppy bad

I used to feel Big Boy was the definition of #2 in terms of tasting processed but the last few times I went there it was good. Dennys has always been good in my book
010

Bebpo

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Re: IHOP, or The New Standard in Sub-Shitty
« Reply #2 on: May 29, 2012, 02:00:54 AM »
They make good fucking pancakes and good coffee

EVERYTHING ELSE THERE IS TERRIBLE (waffles/crepes are ok I guess).


Especially the meat.  Stay away from any meat products there.


But man, the pancakes can be gooood.  If I have to go to court early in the morning, I'll usually stop by IHOP on the way back to work and get some pancakes & coffee.  The pumpkin pancakes in the fall season are so good.

Robo

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Re: IHOP, or The New Standard in Sub-Shitty
« Reply #3 on: May 29, 2012, 02:15:31 AM »
I don't remember IHOP ever being any different than most of the other breakfast chains, but I've never been particularly fond of any outside of Waffle House, which is probably a damning admission.

edit: Hah, there's a photo of my hometown Waffle House on their wikipedia page.  Once, a friend of mine pissed off the roof of that building into the parking lot.  Ahh, memories.
obo

MrAngryFace

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Re: IHOP, or The New Standard in Sub-Shitty
« Reply #4 on: May 29, 2012, 02:19:56 AM »
I like Denny's cause it's not pretending to be something it's not. It's all "hey fucker, it's 2am and you want biscuits and gravy and coffee black. Let's do this."
o_0

Phoenix Dark

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Re: IHOP, or The New Standard in Sub-Shitty
« Reply #5 on: May 29, 2012, 02:22:48 AM »
Plus you get to see cool stuff at Dennys, like the mousy guy with a laptop hitting on the waitress by showing her funny youtube videos. Can't hate on the game :bow
010

Mandark

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Re: IHOP, or The New Standard in Sub-Shitty
« Reply #6 on: May 29, 2012, 02:44:37 AM »
Denny's has a much bigger selection, too.  Though maybe IHOP just has a shortened late night menu like Denny's used to and offers more stuff during regular dining hours.

But what the fuck would you be doing at either of those places before midnight?

recursivelyenumerable

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Re: IHOP, or The New Standard in Sub-Shitty
« Reply #7 on: May 29, 2012, 02:49:35 AM »
But what the fuck would you be doing at either of those places before 2:30 AM?

fixed.
QED

Trent Dole

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Re: IHOP, or The New Standard in Sub-Shitty
« Reply #8 on: May 29, 2012, 02:58:25 AM »
There's a Denny's a few streets over from me that had some weird fight video on youtube go viral so now I'm kinda hesitant to go eat at any Denny's ever.
Hi

Mandark

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Re: IHOP, or The New Standard in Sub-Shitty
« Reply #9 on: May 29, 2012, 03:21:07 AM »
Also, re: that "where would you shit" thread, Denny's is generally not the nicest place to have a bowel movement, but if you're willing to eat there you'd better be willing to poop there too, cause you're not gonna have much say in the matter.

spoiler (click to show/hide)
I don't think I posted in that thread, but I'll poop anywhere there's a working toilet.  All you distinguished sanitary gentlemen amaze me.
[close]

Cormacaroni

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Re: IHOP, or The New Standard in Sub-Shitty
« Reply #10 on: May 29, 2012, 03:52:01 AM »
Denny's has a much bigger selection, too.  Though maybe IHOP just has a shortened late night menu like Denny's used to and offers more stuff during regular dining hours.

But what the fuck would you be doing at either of those places before midnight?

Took this (ok, blurry as fuck) pic at my local Denny's, 'cause Murkins refuse to believe how amazingly good the J version is. Foie gras, bitches! I mean, it's not 5 stars or anything but it is totally respectable food, especially for a relatively cheap diner.

vjj

etiolate

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Re: IHOP, or The New Standard in Sub-Shitty
« Reply #11 on: May 29, 2012, 04:15:02 AM »
wtf

yah IHOP is prety bad but i am not sure Denny's is much better

When we went to Disneyland, we ended up eating at IHOP because there were two right outside of the park. The fresh fruit crepe was okay.

There's a Carrows by my house. It's alright. Get cornbread and chili there. It's not open 24 hours though. When I was in Santa Cruz, I went to the Santa Cruz Diner often for late night grub.

http://www.santacruzdiner.com/

The menu is huge and they serve their salads with beets. Diners with stuff in their salads besides lettuce and the bare minimum are a big plus. They do claim to have pho there, but its only good if the wife of the owner is making it. Otherwise, its like they use steakums meat in the pho.

Human Snorenado

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Re: IHOP, or The New Standard in Sub-Shitty
« Reply #12 on: May 29, 2012, 04:26:43 AM »
tsc tsc Eel, you KNOW when it's late and you're in the mood for DAT GREASE you should be going to the Awful Waffle. :wag
yar

Himu

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Re: IHOP, or The New Standard in Sub-Shitty
« Reply #13 on: May 29, 2012, 07:03:59 AM »
waffle house plz
IYKYK

Huff

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Re: IHOP, or The New Standard in Sub-Shitty
« Reply #14 on: May 29, 2012, 09:34:22 AM »
Shoulda gone to cracker barrel
dur

Brehvolution

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Re: IHOP, or The New Standard in Sub-Shitty
« Reply #15 on: May 29, 2012, 09:46:18 AM »
It's always a dice roll at these places. They don't pay their workers shit so the workers don't give a shit.
©ZH

Eel O'Brian

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Re: IHOP, or The New Standard in Sub-Shitty
« Reply #16 on: May 29, 2012, 10:16:33 AM »
This was around 10:30 in the morning  :-\

She wanted some sort of particular thing that IHOP makes, we were going over to see my folks, and it was on the way.

I live right by a Cracker Barrel, I've eaten there often because when my brother comes to town that's the only fucking place he ever wants to eat at. It's decent enough food for what it is, but there are about a dozen different locally-owned joints in the area that are better. 
sup

Great Rumbler

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Re: IHOP, or The New Standard in Sub-Shitty
« Reply #17 on: May 29, 2012, 10:18:15 AM »
Should've just went to Taco Bell.
dog

Huff

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Re: IHOP, or The New Standard in Sub-Shitty
« Reply #18 on: May 29, 2012, 10:20:30 AM »
Oh yeah, local ma and pops breakfasts are the best

Breakfast is the easiest meal to make, its crazy how these chains can fuck it up
dur

Stoney Mason

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Re: IHOP, or The New Standard in Sub-Shitty
« Reply #19 on: May 29, 2012, 10:21:15 AM »
Never had any problems with ihop. I think its decent relative to what it costs. Yes any mom and pop is better but that goes for just about any type of food.  Now Denny's is god damn awful. I haven't eaten there in about 10 years and hopefully never will again for the rest of my life.

Eel O'Brian

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Re: IHOP, or The New Standard in Sub-Shitty
« Reply #20 on: May 29, 2012, 10:27:10 AM »
Golden Corral has a surprisingly decent breakfast buffet. They have that omelet station where the cook will fry up your shit any way you want it.
sup

tiesto

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Re: IHOP, or The New Standard in Sub-Shitty
« Reply #21 on: May 29, 2012, 10:28:24 AM »
I much prefer the Original Pancake House but they don't have those around the Island. Nor do we have Cracker Barrel believe it or not.
^_^

Mupepe

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Re: IHOP, or The New Standard in Sub-Shitty
« Reply #22 on: May 29, 2012, 10:38:52 AM »
Never had any problems with ihop. I think its decent relative to what it costs. Yes any mom and pop is better but that goes for just about any type of food.  Now Denny's is god damn awful. I haven't eaten there in about 10 years and hopefully never will again for the rest of my life.
I feel totally opposite.  IHOP is such crap and Denny's is decent for the price

MrAngryFace

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Re: IHOP, or The New Standard in Sub-Shitty
« Reply #23 on: May 29, 2012, 10:48:33 AM »
DENNYS IS A HERO- IHOP ARE SOCIALISMZ!
o_0

Dickie Dee

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Re: IHOP, or The New Standard in Sub-Shitty
« Reply #24 on: May 29, 2012, 10:53:23 AM »
Denny's hashbrowns :drool
___

cool breeze

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Re: IHOP, or The New Standard in Sub-Shitty
« Reply #25 on: May 29, 2012, 11:14:27 AM »
There's a Denny's a few streets over from me that had some weird fight video on youtube go viral so now I'm kinda hesitant to go eat at any Denny's ever.

Denny's makes people violent.  One time I saw this guy smacking his kid around the booth and it escalated into a big scene.

I haven't been to IHOP since whenever Bioshock 1 came out.  There are better places closer-by if I want breakfast food.  Now if someone randomly asks to eat at IHOP, I wouldn't turn them down.

Is Cracker Barrel the place where food is unbelievably saucy? I've a vague memory of a plate of warm cheese goo covering sliced potatoes. 
« Last Edit: May 29, 2012, 11:17:13 AM by Linkzg »

MrAngryFace

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Re: IHOP, or The New Standard in Sub-Shitty
« Reply #26 on: May 29, 2012, 11:20:33 AM »
Denny's locations vary in quality; like the Denny's in downtown bellevue I would never...ever go to. It's a dumb- the service is weird/crappy. The one near work, however, is excellent.
o_0

Robo

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Re: IHOP, or The New Standard in Sub-Shitty
« Reply #27 on: May 29, 2012, 11:34:16 AM »
Is Cracker Barrel the place where food is unbelievably saucy? I've a vague memory of a plate of warm cheese goo covering sliced potatoes.

Sounds like that could be Bob Evans, too.
obo

Mandark

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Re: IHOP, or The New Standard in Sub-Shitty
« Reply #28 on: May 29, 2012, 12:18:27 PM »
Never had any problems with ihop. I think its decent relative to what it costs. Yes any mom and pop is better but that goes for just about any type of food.  Now Denny's is god damn awful. I haven't eaten there in about 10 years and hopefully never will again for the rest of my life.
I feel totally opposite.  IHOP is such crap and Denny's is decent for the price

Stoney's just saying that cause they wouldn't seat him. :teehee

Re: IHOP, or The New Standard in Sub-Shitty
« Reply #29 on: May 29, 2012, 12:20:45 PM »
I haven't been to IHOP in at least 10 years, but I remember it being pretty gross back then. The place also smelled like dirty bleach water, so that wasn't helping.

If you want big chain pancakes, Original Pancake House is the way to go.



Before we bought our house, we lived right next to the Seattle OPH. You could see the neon sign out our living room window. I miss it.
« Last Edit: May 29, 2012, 12:22:32 PM by Mr. Gundam »
野球

MrAngryFace

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Re: IHOP, or The New Standard in Sub-Shitty
« Reply #30 on: May 29, 2012, 12:22:41 PM »
I like pancakes not at all- dont wanna get fatz0rz :(
o_0

Re: IHOP, or The New Standard in Sub-Shitty
« Reply #31 on: May 29, 2012, 12:23:23 PM »
I like pancakes not at all- dont wanna get fatz0rz :(

I loooove pancakes, but I only eat them like 4 or 5 times a year.
野球

Robo

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Re: IHOP, or The New Standard in Sub-Shitty
« Reply #32 on: May 29, 2012, 12:50:01 PM »
I haven't been to IHOP in at least 10 years, but I remember it being pretty gross back then. The place also smelled like dirty bleach water, so that wasn't helping.

If you want big chain pancakes, Original Pancake House is the way to go.

(Image removed from quote.)

Before we bought our house, we lived right next to the Seattle OPH. You could see the neon sign out our living room window. I miss it.

There's an OPH down the street from my apartment.  The last time I ate there I had the most salty, rich eggs benedict I've ever seen in my life—they must've used six poached eggs on that thing, but I couldn't make them out through the mountain of hollandaise.  No way I could finish it, and I thought for sure I might have a heart attack from the portion I did manage to eat.  Not recommended if you value your life.
obo

Re: IHOP, or The New Standard in Sub-Shitty
« Reply #33 on: May 29, 2012, 12:53:27 PM »
I only have pancakes there, so couldn't tell you about the Benedict.
野球

Robo

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Re: IHOP, or The New Standard in Sub-Shitty
« Reply #34 on: May 29, 2012, 12:59:13 PM »
All of their food is a bit on the gluttonous side, though not quite as bad as that.  That eggs benedict was the only time I've ever thought I could realistically croak from a meal.
obo

Great Rumbler

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Re: IHOP, or The New Standard in Sub-Shitty
« Reply #35 on: May 29, 2012, 01:42:22 PM »
My favorite place to get breakfast is this little place in Oklahoma called Hobo Joe's. It's just too good; painfully unhealthy, I'm sure, but still...
dog

bork

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Re: IHOP, or The New Standard in Sub-Shitty
« Reply #36 on: May 29, 2012, 01:42:42 PM »
Denny's has a much bigger selection, too.  Though maybe IHOP just has a shortened late night menu like Denny's used to and offers more stuff during regular dining hours.

But what the fuck would you be doing at either of those places before midnight?

Took this (ok, blurry as fuck) pic at my local Denny's, 'cause Murkins refuse to believe how amazingly good the J version is. Foie gras, bitches! I mean, it's not 5 stars or anything but it is totally respectable food, especially for a relatively cheap diner.

(Image removed from quote.)

The only thing they really have in common is the name.  I found a Big Boy restaurant out in Ishikawa and was all excited to go in for some good ol' greasy disgusting food.  Was nothing like the real Big Boy in the States and just your typical Japanese Famires.
ど助平

Van Cruncheon

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Re: IHOP, or The New Standard in Sub-Shitty
« Reply #37 on: May 29, 2012, 06:32:48 PM »
original pancake house has fuck amazing omelets
duc

MrAngryFace

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Re: IHOP, or The New Standard in Sub-Shitty
« Reply #38 on: May 29, 2012, 06:34:57 PM »
god damnit, you're gonna MAKE ME GO WITH FUCKIN LEGENDARY OMELETTE STORIES?! FUKKKK



.......maybe this weekend :/
o_0

Barry Egan

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Re: IHOP, or The New Standard in Sub-Shitty
« Reply #39 on: May 29, 2012, 06:37:57 PM »
Never had any problems with ihop. I think its decent relative to what it costs. Yes any mom and pop is better but that goes for just about any type of food.  Now Denny's is god damn awful. I haven't eaten there in about 10 years and hopefully never will again for the rest of my life.
I feel totally opposite.  IHOP is such crap and Denny's is decent for the price

Stoney's just saying that cause they wouldn't seat him. :teehee

 :lol

Smooth Groove

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Re: IHOP, or The New Standard in Sub-Shitty
« Reply #40 on: May 29, 2012, 06:49:28 PM »
Omelettes are pretty much the only things I eat at places like IHOP and Denny's.  I think it all comes down to location for chains like those.

In my city, Ihop is a bit better than Denny's.  IHOP tastes like standard restaurant food while Denny's is like microwaved leftovers.


Stoney Mason

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Re: IHOP, or The New Standard in Sub-Shitty
« Reply #41 on: May 29, 2012, 07:16:22 PM »
Never had any problems with ihop. I think its decent relative to what it costs. Yes any mom and pop is better but that goes for just about any type of food.  Now Denny's is god damn awful. I haven't eaten there in about 10 years and hopefully never will again for the rest of my life.
I feel totally opposite.  IHOP is such crap and Denny's is decent for the price

Stoney's just saying that cause they wouldn't seat him. :teehee


I don't know what it is about these places that turn them into kkk rallies.

http://smirkingchimp.com/thread/1945

Phoenix Dark

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Re: IHOP, or The New Standard in Sub-Shitty
« Reply #42 on: May 29, 2012, 07:25:32 PM »
I've had bad experiences at Cracker Barrels down south and in the more rural areas of Michigan
010

Smooth Groove

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Re: IHOP, or The New Standard in Sub-Shitty
« Reply #43 on: May 29, 2012, 07:29:44 PM »
Well, it is called Cracker Barrel. 

Stoney Mason

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Re: IHOP, or The New Standard in Sub-Shitty
« Reply #44 on: May 29, 2012, 07:39:03 PM »
Slightly off-topic but when I was a kid the family often went to eat at this restaurant. I find the whole place hilarious now. Like some weird relic from another age. The drinks are served in clear jelly mason jars.

http://www.pofolks.com/

Phoenix Dark

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Re: IHOP, or The New Standard in Sub-Shitty
« Reply #45 on: May 29, 2012, 07:49:16 PM »
My only uncomfortable semi race related encounters at businesses/restaurants:

1. Fantastic Sams

I was rather young and we had just moved from Detroit to the suburbs. My mom took me, and one of the barbers told her they didn't know how to cut black hair lol.

2. Cracker Barrel

First time: we waited 30 minutes for a waiter to take our order (North Carolina, I was around 10). Second time was in Michigan and our waiter was just very...rude; I was about 14 at the time. Looking back, I think she must have assumed we weren't going to tip and therefore treated us like crap. My dad tipped anyway, and told me you're always supposed to tip, but just lower the percentage for bad service.
010

Mandark

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Re: IHOP, or The New Standard in Sub-Shitty
« Reply #46 on: May 29, 2012, 11:59:33 PM »
1. Fantastic Sams

I was rather young and we had just moved from Detroit to the suburbs. My mom took me, and one of the barbers told her they didn't know how to cut black hair lol.

There was a barbershop next to my old work with the stereotypical old black guys chilling and haranguing each other about sports.  I only got my hair cut there once, and had to wait cause the first barber available said he didn't know how to do white hair longer than a buzzcut.

And he was the only white guy cutting hair in there.

Himu

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Re: IHOP, or The New Standard in Sub-Shitty
« Reply #47 on: May 30, 2012, 12:01:39 AM »
1. Fantastic Sams

I was rather young and we had just moved from Detroit to the suburbs. My mom took me, and one of the barbers told her they didn't know how to cut black hair lol.

There was a barbershop next to my old work with the stereotypical old black guys chilling and haranguing each other about sports.  I only got my hair cut there once, and had to wait cause the first barber available said he didn't know how to do white hair longer than a buzzcut.

And he was the only white guy cutting hair in there.

:lol
IYKYK

Lan

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Re: IHOP, or The New Standard in Sub-Shitty
« Reply #48 on: May 30, 2012, 01:21:12 PM »
I once worked at IHOP.

People tip extremely bad. Most people think service is free, or that the food prices also cover service fees, or their just assholes.

Phoenix Dark

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Re: IHOP, or The New Standard in Sub-Shitty
« Reply #49 on: May 31, 2012, 07:26:50 PM »
1. Fantastic Sams

I was rather young and we had just moved from Detroit to the suburbs. My mom took me, and one of the barbers told her they didn't know how to cut black hair lol.

There was a barbershop next to my old work with the stereotypical old black guys chilling and haranguing each other about sports.  I only got my hair cut there once, and had to wait cause the first barber available said he didn't know how to do white hair longer than a buzzcut.

And he was the only white guy cutting hair in there.
:lol

Now that I think about it, I doubt the barbers at the place I frequent can cut white hair outside of buzz cuts. A few white military guys come in and get buzz cuts but that's about it. There are a few frequent Arab customers who go all out with the black hair styles, including one guy with 360 waves
010