Childhood friends from Elementary school. We grew up together. Another childhood friend sent me a message on FB to ask me to call him and check up on him because he sent her a meltdown message on her phone. I said I could beat that and that I'd go visit him myself after work. His mother died a few months ago, and he's been struggling with a whole lot, having crappy facebook meltdowns, turning away from EVERYONE he knows.
I went to his place around 7pm. His dad answered the door, let me in, and showed me upstairs. I went inside his room and found him flat out drunk on his bed. He had at least a dozen beers sitting on his nightstand, with some vodka bottles nearby for good measure. and said he had been drinking ALL DAY. I tried to get him to go with me to Jack in the Box to eat some food so we could talk but he said his stomach wasn't up to it so I indulged myself by picking up his room of beer bottles and put them in the trash. So we decided to take a walk, and he was hobbling the entire time. He was slightly incoherent, and would repeat stuff I said. He was drunk off his balls. During our walk, I tried to tell him that he was killing himself but he kept on smoking. He smoked at least 6-7 cigs during our walk in his drunken stupor.
I noticed his teeth and they were really stained yellow-ish brown seemed smaller than the last time I saw him. I've never seen such colored teeth before besides one other person in my lifetime. I'm not sure if it's from hard drugs or from the alcohol abuse, but it's really gross. I know he dabbled in coke before...but I'm not sure if he's back on it.
Anyways, during our walk I tried to see if there was anyone there for him to help him get out of his rut, and he said his sister doesn't want to talk to him, I asked why, and he would avoid the answer. I said I need to talk to his dad about this and he said I didn't need to, that he was scared - scared of what? I don't know - but I somehow managed to convince him we both need to talk with his dad.
Talking with his father was both sad and revealing. He said that he has been to rehab twice this year already, and has been in rehab every year for the past SIX years and that he's tired, and he's trying to do all he can. He said his sister doesn't want to talk to him because he verbally abused her online. He said his son refuses to take his medicines, go to therapy and receive any type of help and just wants to lay around getting drunk all day. I told him before we talked to his dad that I was disappointed in him, and that he is not the same guy I grew up with, but I wanted to help him in any way I could, starting with his father. That convinced him to have a dialogue between me, him, and his dad. I told my friend that we should handle this just like we handled it outside - one step at a time, and that I will be texting him personally every day to make sure he takes his medicines.
He starting to dryheave, I noticed the time - I was with him for about two hours at that point - and I left.
Suffice to say, my buddy is fucking killing himself and there's nothing I can do about it.
I feel so powerless. I have lost so many friends to drugs, substance abuse, and hard drug use. I don't want to lose another one. Can I do something, anything to help him?
