Author Topic: Things you would genetically modify about yourself  (Read 2303 times)

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ToxicAdam

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Things you would genetically modify about yourself
« on: December 27, 2012, 11:04:10 AM »
Behavior-based new years resolutions are so boring, let's make some that change the fabric of our being.

Remove:

Fight or flight mechanism (anxiety)
Scent from my urine
Body hair

Add:

Thick hair that remains the same color until I die




Momo

  • Nebuchadnezzar
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Re: Things you would genetically modify about yourself
« Reply #1 on: December 27, 2012, 11:46:48 AM »
Change my eye color to black
Make it so i can eat all the junk i want without becoming a fatty
Allow my brain to be used at 100% of capacity, with my body compensating for the extra load
allow me to secrete a "stay the fuck away" pherimone/chemical/wahtever on demand that works on humans, animals, insects, any living thing and it is effective 100% of the time

Human Snorenado

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Re: Things you would genetically modify about yourself
« Reply #2 on: December 27, 2012, 01:58:29 PM »
Fuck all that, I just want to put my brain into an ED-209 or something.
yar

Diunx

  • Humble motherfucker with a big-ass dick
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Re: Things you would genetically modify about yourself
« Reply #3 on: December 27, 2012, 01:59:29 PM »
taller, better hair, smaller nose, remove my speech impediment, better metabolism.
Drunk

CajoleJuice

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Re: Things you would genetically modify about yourself
« Reply #4 on: December 27, 2012, 02:32:23 PM »
Be able to live and thrive on only alcohol, while still getting the drunk sensation.
AMC

Rahxephon91

  • Senior Member
Re: Things you would genetically modify about yourself
« Reply #5 on: December 27, 2012, 02:33:46 PM »
Make myself taller, make my penis bigger, make my hair better, lighten my skin color, change my face so my forehead is'nt so big, have beeter muscle tone, and I guess thats about it.

Huff

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Things you would genetically modify about yourself
« Reply #6 on: December 27, 2012, 02:35:03 PM »
Be able to fool my taste buds that the wells liquor and natty ice taste great
dur

Eel O'Brian

  • Southern Permasexual
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Re: Things you would genetically modify about yourself
« Reply #7 on: December 27, 2012, 02:37:54 PM »
invulnerable spinal column
sup

headwalk

  • brutal deluxe
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Re: Things you would genetically modify about yourself
« Reply #8 on: December 27, 2012, 03:03:55 PM »
i'd like to evolve a bone in my ear which makes it impossible for me to hear salsa.

Positive Touch

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Re: Things you would genetically modify about yourself
« Reply #9 on: December 27, 2012, 03:05:22 PM »
invulnerable spinal column

winner

i would also add knees to this
pcp

Human Snorenado

  • Stay out of Malibu, Lebowski
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Re: Things you would genetically modify about yourself
« Reply #10 on: December 27, 2012, 03:18:42 PM »
invulnerable spinal column

winner

i would also add knees to this

All of that gets covered when you put your brain into a Terminator exoskeleton or whatever.  Biology is never going to be able to outperform technology, plus metal is sexier than flesh.
yar

Robo

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Re: Things you would genetically modify about yourself
« Reply #11 on: December 27, 2012, 07:41:54 PM »
Bigger tits.
obo

BlackMage

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Re: Things you would genetically modify about yourself
« Reply #12 on: December 28, 2012, 02:37:36 AM »
bigger frame i guess.
UNF

recursivelyenumerable

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Re: Things you would genetically modify about yourself
« Reply #13 on: December 28, 2012, 02:39:43 AM »
Forked tongue

Also that dying thing is kind of a drag, so I'd get rid of that
« Last Edit: December 28, 2012, 02:42:38 AM by recursivelyenumerable »
QED

pickle

  • Member
Re: Things you would genetically modify about yourself
« Reply #14 on: December 28, 2012, 03:57:37 AM »
I was actually thinking about that a few days ago. Honestly, I probably wouldn't change anything. I'd like to have the skin that I had when I was 12 but that's about it (possibly slightly more penis girth?)

Shaka Khan

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Things you would genetically modify about yourself
« Reply #15 on: December 28, 2012, 09:41:45 AM »
Body hair that grows at will.
Unzip

Phoenix Dark

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Re: Things you would genetically modify about yourself
« Reply #16 on: December 28, 2012, 12:05:17 PM »
I'm tall dark and handsome. But on the other hand I have an annoying widows peak which I'd definitely get rid of. I only recently figured out how to cut it off without fucking up my hairline; I'm not losing my hair, it's just weirdly straight to a degree which makes it hard to deal with at certain lengths. In the past I'd just give up on cutting it and I'd look so bad three weeks after a barbershop visit lol
010

Diunx

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Re: Things you would genetically modify about yourself
« Reply #17 on: December 28, 2012, 02:31:57 PM »
i'd like to evolve a bone in my ear which makes it impossible for me to hear salsa.

Racist
Drunk

Flannel Boy

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Re: Things you would genetically modify about yourself
« Reply #18 on: December 28, 2012, 02:32:11 PM »
Everything.

Huff

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Re: Things you would genetically modify about yourself
« Reply #19 on: December 28, 2012, 02:47:08 PM »
not having hangovers would be magical
dur

Joe Molotov

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Re: Things you would genetically modify about yourself
« Reply #20 on: December 28, 2012, 03:01:17 PM »
Genetics is old hat, I'm holding out for cybernetic modifications.
©@©™

lordmaji

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Re: Things you would genetically modify about yourself
« Reply #21 on: December 28, 2012, 04:31:35 PM »
Genetics is old hat, I'm holding out for cybernetic modifications.
This!!!

I was thinking the same thing. Oh, and mad abs without having to do too much working out to obtain this and keep it up!  :lol
« Last Edit: December 28, 2012, 04:33:11 PM by lordmaji »
:-[

Olivia Wilde Homo

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Re: Things you would genetically modify about yourself
« Reply #22 on: December 28, 2012, 06:13:23 PM »
I want a cock so huge that I almost pass out due to blood loss/redirection whenever I get a boner.
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Trent Dole

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Re: Things you would genetically modify about yourself
« Reply #23 on: December 28, 2012, 11:18:19 PM »
Everything.
This is the correct answer. Dat self loathing :-*
Hi

Groogrux

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Re: Things you would genetically modify about yourself
« Reply #24 on: December 28, 2012, 11:22:34 PM »
Less fat, bigger dick.
WTF

Steve Contra

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Re: Things you would genetically modify about yourself
« Reply #25 on: December 28, 2012, 11:26:17 PM »
I'd basically just make myself look like a young Idris Elba.
vin

Flannel Boy

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Re: Things you would genetically modify about yourself
« Reply #26 on: December 28, 2012, 11:27:57 PM »
I'd basically just make myself look like a young Idris Elba.
I'd choose a young Jessica Alba.

Phoenix Dark

  • I got no game it's just some bitches understand my story
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Re: Things you would genetically modify about yourself
« Reply #27 on: December 28, 2012, 11:30:38 PM »
I'd basically just make myself look like a young Idris Elba.

i already got the height :bow
got the complexion :bow
lacking the facial hair  :'(
010

Positive Touch

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Re: Things you would genetically modify about yourself
« Reply #28 on: December 29, 2012, 02:42:36 AM »
Body hair that grows at will.

WHY


id make it so that i never got pale from too much gaming :(
pcp

Shaka Khan

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Things you would genetically modify about yourself
« Reply #29 on: December 29, 2012, 04:07:13 AM »
WHY

To satisfy various differing criteria on the fly, of course.
Unzip

recursivelyenumerable

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Re: Things you would genetically modify about yourself
« Reply #30 on: December 29, 2012, 04:13:43 AM »
But tbh, I'd settle for being able to do stuff when I fucking tell myself to do it.
QED

Bildi

  • AKA Bildo
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Re: Things you would genetically modify about yourself
« Reply #31 on: December 30, 2012, 09:37:18 PM »
More body hair.  Like full ape.  So I only attract girls who like body hair and not the ones who suggest a few months down the track that you start shaving or waxing some of it.  They need to know up front there's no hope of me being anything less than a manly man. :-*

Momo

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Re: Things you would genetically modify about yourself
« Reply #32 on: December 30, 2012, 11:03:23 PM »
Also I'd make myself a cylon

fistfulofmetal

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Re: Things you would genetically modify about yourself
« Reply #33 on: December 30, 2012, 11:04:41 PM »
would love to get rid of my facial hair. it grows in very slow and un-even. i only have to shave it once a week but i would rather not have to at all. it doesnt look good on me in the first place.
nat

Joe Molotov

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Re: Things you would genetically modify about yourself
« Reply #34 on: December 31, 2012, 01:34:54 AM »
I'd like to be taller.
I'd like to be a baller.
I'd like to have a girl so that I'd call her.

20-inch blades on your impala?
©@©™

Don Flamenco

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Re: Things you would genetically modify about yourself
« Reply #35 on: December 31, 2012, 10:45:08 AM »
i would shrink my dick a little to make the competition a little more fair for everyone else.

chronovore

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Re: Things you would genetically modify about yourself
« Reply #36 on: January 02, 2013, 03:03:48 AM »
I'd like to be able to digest corn.

Fifstar

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Re: Things you would genetically modify about yourself
« Reply #37 on: January 02, 2013, 04:19:19 AM »
Would change my vocal chords or whatever to have a great sounding voice & singing abilities. I'd give up an inch of my dick for that easiliy.

ALso, stop that slow but steady hair loss.
Gulp

Olivia Wilde Homo

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Re: Things you would genetically modify about yourself
« Reply #38 on: January 02, 2013, 07:08:43 AM »
I'm not balding but my hair is so thin and brittle and shitty looking that I keep it short anyway.  I heard hair genetics come from the mother's side and it makes me cry.  My uncles on my mother's side all have full, lustrous heads of hair into their 50s and 60s.  One rocks a John Romero like mane since he retired from the Army.  It's not fair!  :bawl
« Last Edit: January 02, 2013, 07:10:54 AM by The Experiment »
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Barry Egan

  • The neurotic is nailed to the cross of his fiction.
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Re: Things you would genetically modify about yourself
« Reply #39 on: January 02, 2013, 09:28:17 AM »
I would alter my metabolism so that I could just eat all the things without collateral damage.

chronovore

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Re: Things you would genetically modify about yourself
« Reply #40 on: January 02, 2013, 10:53:23 PM »
Yeah, I've been losing hair for about four years. Propecia definitely slowed the rate of hair loss, but supposedly it only works for about five years. I'll probably be noticeably balder by 2015 unless I get a transplant. I'd love to carry a full head of hair into my old age.

Father Mike's got that angle covered. Unfortunately, the full head of hair is in a bag, attached to someone else's head.

Phoenix Dark

  • I got no game it's just some bitches understand my story
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Re: Things you would genetically modify about yourself
« Reply #41 on: January 02, 2013, 10:58:37 PM »
I'd like to be able to digest corn.

you are a cat?  :o
010

drew

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Re: Things you would genetically modify about yourself
« Reply #42 on: January 02, 2013, 11:13:40 PM »
my dick to be smaller LOL

chronovore

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Re: Things you would genetically modify about yourself
« Reply #43 on: January 07, 2013, 04:06:39 AM »
I'd like to be able to digest corn.

you are a cat?  :o

I meant I'd like to be able to fully digest corn.