It's the weekend Lowtax has his visitation with his kids. They are sitting at the dinner table when Lowtax can barely contain his excitement.
"I have a marvelous surprise for you this weekend! Take a guess where we're going?" he says.
"Disneyland!" says the youngest
"6 Flags!" says the oldest
"Nope, even better!" He leans forward with his hand clasped in front of him resting on the table. "How would you girls like to spend the weekend at daddy's office in the strip mall making Minecraft LP's?"
"EEEEEeeEEeeeEEEEeomgomgomg" Shmorky overheard the conversation and came bounding into the dining room. "I LOVE your LP's 'Taxy!" he squealed. "I'm going to make Goku and give him rainbow colored hair! Won't that be zany??" He pirouetted around the room, one hand on his head to keep his yarn wig from flying off as he danced around with excitement.
Lowtax sighed and told his disappointed daughters to go pack their suitcases. Once they were out of the room, Lowtax looked at Shmorky and shook his head. "Sorry Shmork, not this time."
Shmorky's lower lip trembled "But, but...you said you girls. I thought..." his sentence trailed off as he fought back tears.
Lowtax pushed his chair away from the table and patted his lap. Shmorky, with his head down, walked over to Lowtax and sat down on his lap. Lowtax heard a wet "schlortch" when Shmorky's ass made contact with his thighs. He had shit his diaper; the prospect of spending a weekend at the SA Headquarters got him that excited.
Lowtax wrapped his arms around Shmorky "You're a delicate flower and I am holding you in my big, strong arms." Lowtax knew the right things to say to calm Shmorky down when his feelings were hurt. "When the forums were down, I lost hundreds of dollars. I need to make LP's to make up for the lost income since I get a lot more views when my children are involved." He continued to hold Shmorky, rocking him a little bit. "I need you to stay here to keep an eye on things in case they show up."
Shmorky's eyes lit up with renewed excitement. He understood the importance of keeping them away- the ones who attempted to take pictures of Lowtax's house and put them on the internet. He wiped his nose and nodded "I promise I will do my bestest at keeping the internet thugs away from the house."
Lowtax patted him on the back "I promise I will make it up to you. When my ex gets the kids on Monday, you can model the Chinese diapers I bought for you when I was in China. Now go get cleaned up and prepare yourself for a long weekend."
Shmorky leaped of Tax's lap and skipped happily out of the room. There was still a faint odor of feces but that was OK. Lowtax found the smell comforting, knowing his house will be safe from the evils of the internet. He went to see if his kids were ready yet, he had big plans for them this weekend. So many LP's, so little time.
