Author Topic: EB thread of let's talk about our shitty families (Read 4394 times)

Human Snorenado · « **on:** August 23, 2013, 03:32:29 PM »

...here because I can't do it elsewhere without causing an even bigger fucking blow up than I just did and I really don't wanna fuck with the fallout.

tl;dr version- my sister is 34, has a kid with asperger's (actual asperger's) and is engaged to a 23 year old idiot. Sister can't hold a job, is almost done with school (and the financial aid that it's been providing her to stay "sort of" afloat) and mom recently quit her job and is living off a really modest monthly inheritance/social security. And by living off of, I mean, I'm paying like half the bills while she subsidizes the fucktard household.

So, idiot fiance has had like four jobs in five months and keeps quitting because either people are "mean to him" or in the case of his painting job, he fucked up his shoulder and is physically unable to do it for another six months, whereupon no one will be hiring painters. He just called to let her know that the most recent job "didn't work out" because "the trainer was being rude and mean."

So fucking livid right now. Expecting your 62 year old mother to support you, your child and your fiance because you and your fiance can't hold jobs is the height of fucking bullshit. Grow the fuck up, strap on your big boy and girl panties and except that JOBS SUCK AND THAT'S PART OF LIFE. Oh, I'm sorry, the trainer hurt your fucking feelings? You poor beautiful snowflake you.

About ready to fucking kill people.

Mandark · « **Reply #1 on:** August 23, 2013, 03:33:55 PM »

My family is awesome and I love them.

Steve Contra · « **Reply #2 on:** August 23, 2013, 03:35:06 PM »

Quote from: Mandark on August 23, 2013, 03:33:55 PM

My family is awesome and I love them.

Yeah my family and in-laws are awesome.

Human Snorenado · « **Reply #3 on:** August 23, 2013, 03:35:29 PM »

FUCK BOTH OF YOUR COUCHES WITH THOR'S DILDO OF JUSTICE

king of the internet · « **Reply #4 on:** August 23, 2013, 03:39:20 PM »

I'm probably the worst person in my family.

nudemacusers · « **Reply #5 on:** August 23, 2013, 03:43:44 PM »

Due to a childhood of abuse, endless emotional toil and drama I no longer have anything to do with my family from the day I got married. Zilch. Especially when my mom and dad got in a screaming match in the parking lot outside the reception.

fistfulofmetal · « **Reply #6 on:** August 23, 2013, 03:53:32 PM »

My mother once threatened to kick me out of the house because the blanket being used to separate the front of the house to the rest of the house was not properly sitting and some of the warm air was getting through (winter).

Brehvolution · « **Reply #7 on:** August 23, 2013, 04:03:38 PM »

I used to be real close to my father in law. Even worked for him for a couple years. Then 1 morning in 2009, fox news turned him into a raging teatard. We don't talk much outside of family gatherings like we used to. I just wish I could get him to understand that anxiety caused by non existing communism is a complete waste of his time at this point in his life. When I'm his age, the last thing I'll be doing is sitting in front of the TV all day complaining about the government.

demi · « **Reply #8 on:** August 23, 2013, 04:04:27 PM »

That must be rough, fistful.

fistfulofmetal · « **Reply #9 on:** August 23, 2013, 04:09:36 PM »

Quote from: demi on August 23, 2013, 04:04:27 PM

That must be rough, fistful.

It is my struggle.

Mr. Gundam · « **Reply #10 on:** August 23, 2013, 04:21:09 PM »

Quote from: Steve Contra on August 23, 2013, 03:35:06 PM

Quote from: Mandark on August 23, 2013, 03:33:55 PM
My family is awesome and I love them.
Yeah my family and in-laws are awesome.

Same here.

But holy shit Oldguy, time to move the fuck away.

Mupepe · « **Reply #11 on:** August 23, 2013, 04:24:46 PM »

I'll copy and paste this from the other feels thread:

I don't talk to my grandparents on my father's side. Or anyone from there actually. They pretty much disowned me for getting a mexican pregnant at 17. For my high school graduation I got a card that told me I was an embarrassment and they weren't coming. Why the fuck even bother to get a card at that point? I saw them at my dad's funeral but didn't speak to them except my grandfather.

I also don't talk to my family on my mom's side. She owned a bar and her brother stole everything from it while she was visiting us in Tennessee (living with my dad). TV's, pool tables, jukeboxes, beer, everything. I remember it was only about 20 minutes after they first found my grandpa's body that my cousins were trying to get into his safe. His body was less than 3 feet away while they sat in a circle trying to figure out how to open it without the combination.

Polari · « **Reply #12 on:** August 23, 2013, 04:41:55 PM »

Quote from: Mandark on August 23, 2013, 03:33:55 PM

My family is awesome and I love them.

Yeah pretty much. Just went on holiday with my folks around Italy and the UK. At one point I did think to myself: at 26 am I too old to be going on holiday with my parents and letting them pay for everything? And then I realised I don't give a fuck 'cos anyone that says so is just a jealous hater.

Human Snorenado · « **Reply #13 on:** August 23, 2013, 05:07:57 PM »

Quote from: Mr. Gundam on August 23, 2013, 04:21:09 PM

Quote from: Steve Contra on August 23, 2013, 03:35:06 PM
Quote from: Mandark on August 23, 2013, 03:33:55 PM
My family is awesome and I love them.
Yeah my family and in-laws are awesome.

Same here.

But holy shit Oldguy, time to move the fuck away.

I have two more semesters of school. If I could just move back to Georgia and have in-state tuition rates and finish up there, I would have done it already. I basically need to make it nine more months without killing anyone, which is looking increasingly doubtful.

nudemacusers · « **Reply #14 on:** August 23, 2013, 05:09:15 PM »

You'll be ok. I had no hope but once I got out of proximity I am much happier.

Human Snorenado · « **Reply #15 on:** August 23, 2013, 05:19:53 PM »

I just want to fucking strangle my sister, man. It's like how the fuck can you be your age and not understand that this is how the fucking real world works? Granted, my mother is a large part of the problem- she's basically always supported my sister, but before she could afford it- had a decent job, etc. Mom lost her decent paying job in fall 2009 and my sister hasn't dug her claws out at all.

huckleberry · « **Reply #16 on:** August 23, 2013, 06:21:29 PM »

I have so many fucktards in my family that I just finally told half of them to fuck off and the other half stay at arms length for fear of being told to fuck off as well. My in laws are fucking douche bags and have been told to go fuck themselves as well.

Life is pretty good - until I need a babbysitter.

Positive Touch · « **Reply #17 on:** August 23, 2013, 06:22:07 PM »

Quote from: Creepy Old Guy on August 23, 2013, 05:19:53 PM

I just want to fucking strangle my sister, man. It's like how the fuck can you be your age and not understand that this is how the fucking real world works? Granted, my mother is a large part of the problem- she's basically always supported my sister, but before she could afford it- had a decent job, etc. Mom lost her decent paying job in fall 2009 and my sister hasn't dug her claws out at all.

yes sister acts bad but mom is an enabler. realize you can do nothing to change this no matter how much they both complain and keep your distance. it really is the only way.

Human Snorenado · « **Reply #18 on:** August 23, 2013, 06:24:00 PM »

Yeah, well, if my living/financial situation wasn't tangled up with them for the next nine months it wouldn't be so bad. But you're right, my dad has given me the exact same advice- "Their whole goal is to make you miserable. If you play the game at all, you're losing by default."

Positive Touch · « **Reply #19 on:** August 23, 2013, 06:25:45 PM »

also always remember "you can't change someone unless they want to change." the #1 piece of advice to save yourself from others trainwrecks

Olivia Wilde Homo · « **Reply #20 on:** August 23, 2013, 06:25:52 PM »

Does your sister claim to have fibromyalgia?

Human Snorenado · « **Reply #21 on:** August 23, 2013, 06:31:40 PM »

Quote from: The Experiment on August 23, 2013, 06:25:52 PM

Does your sister claim to have fibromyalgia?

No. She's often sick though, which is not surprising given that her house looks like an episode of hoarders and she eats like shit constantly. She's just a fucking train wreck.

nudemacusers · « **Reply #22 on:** August 23, 2013, 06:34:28 PM »

Quote from: Positive Touch on August 23, 2013, 06:25:45 PM

also always remember "you can't change someone unless they want to change." the #1 piece of advice to save yourself from others trainwrecks

sounds trite but seriously, you have to whisper this to yourself until it sticks. I tried a lot of times to 'save' my mother but after going through the same cycle over and over, I realized I was getting sucked into a vortex.

Human Snorenado · « **Reply #23 on:** August 23, 2013, 06:38:27 PM »

Yeah. In retrospect, about 2 1/2 years ago when I made the suggestion to my mother about living together while I finished school, I should have just not. She was living with my sister at the time, and was the only one working, AND the only one doing any fucking housework, as since I've previously stated my sister is a fucking mess and incapable of cleaning up after herself/others or throwing anything away. It just fucking infuriates me, as she shouldn't HAVE to deal with that, but she keeps letting the fucking golddigging fucktard walk all over her.

nudemacusers · « **Reply #24 on:** August 23, 2013, 06:45:46 PM »

Dude, my mom got separated from my dad for almost a full year (after he lost his job due to failing a drug test... not sure what drug) and him generally being an abusive asshole, my grandmother moved in and they got job doing real estate together, and started actually making more money than before the split. Our relationship was mending, I could visit the house without getting nauseated from fear and anxiety, and everything was going well.

And she still took him back.

Why? She just didn't see eye to eye with my grandmother, they "disagreed over too many things". And she's telling me this, and I'm thinking, well fuck mom, better to disagree than have a chair thrown through a window and your engine being sabotaged so you can't leave the house. But no, she asked my grandmother to move out so he could come back and do whatever. It was at that point I just gave up entirely. She plainly chose him over me and my brothers.

Olivia Wilde Homo · « **Reply #25 on:** August 23, 2013, 06:47:58 PM »

My sister is a trainwreck too but not to the degree that Triumph has experienced:

- Was going to drop out of high school but my parents told her that she would be kicked out if she did. So she just graduated with a dog shit GPA (2.1), which I didn't even think was possible in high school.
- Worked a dead end job until she married some guy. Tons of drama ensued. I hadn't talked to her in years during this time.
- She quit her job. Her husband makes decent money ($20/hr is plenty) but had two kids with exorbitant amounts of child support. As a result, they lived in some shithole.
- She went to school at a for profit college. Spent $25,000 on a worthless certificate. I'm not kidding.
- Couldn't find a job with her worthless certificate. She couldn't get a job until she took it off her resume.
- She proceeds to blow paychecks on concerts, tattoos, trips to Chicago, and sushi. Lots and lots of sushi. She also likes to frequent bars with her friends, many of whom have no jobs.
- Her gift to herself for getting a job that paid $13/hr was a brand new car that was about $30,000. She asked me for $5,000 for a down payment. I told her no and I haven't really talked to her since.

Shadow Mod · « **Reply #26 on:** August 23, 2013, 06:48:32 PM »

Quote from: macuser3of5 on August 23, 2013, 06:45:46 PM

Dude, my mom got separated from my dad for almost a full year (after he lost his job due to failing a drug test... not sure what drug) and him generally being an abusive asshole, got a job doing real estate with my grandmother, and started actually making more money than before the split. Our relationship was mending, I could visit the house without getting nauseated from fear and anxiety, and everything was going well.

And she still took him back.

Why? She just didn't see eye to eye with my grandmother, they "disagreed over too many things". And she's telling me this, and I'm thinking, well fuck mom, better to disagree than have a chair thrown through a window. But no, she asked my grandmother to move out so he could come back and do whatever. It was at that point I just gave up entirely. She plainly chose him over me and my brothers.

Ugh dude, I'm sorry.

It's shit like this that pisses me off about people who have kids and don't put them first. You gotta make yourself happy and all but you bring a child into this world, you basically said "I am having a human being whom I need to prioritize over myself." Of course plenty of people don't actually believe that statement, so it's all fucked.

Himu · « **Reply #27 on:** August 23, 2013, 07:25:21 PM »

Jesus Christ this thread.

Human Snorenado · « **Reply #28 on:** August 23, 2013, 07:26:44 PM »

Ha. Ha. Ha.

My sister's 22 year old fiance just called me to yell at me for "talking shit behind his back about things I don't know anything about" and proceeded to get even angrier as I laughed in his face for like five minutes. He also told me "to get a real job" which is, really, just fucking precious.

Mr. Gundam · « **Reply #29 on:** August 23, 2013, 07:42:43 PM »

Quote from: Creepy Old Guy on August 23, 2013, 07:26:44 PM

Ha. Ha. Ha.

My sister's 22 year old fiance just called me to yell at me for "talking shit behind his back about things I don't know anything about" and proceeded to get even angrier as I laughed in his face for like five minutes. He also told me "to get a real job" which is, really, just fucking precious.

Saw that on Facebook, I'm waiting for awesome carnival of the stupid.

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #30 on:** August 23, 2013, 07:44:57 PM »

A friend and I were walking out of the gym when my mom suddenly rolled up on us; she was heading to a grocery store that's within the same parking lot area. We were talking, and my friend mentioned that he's engaged/getting married next year. My mom's response: "Oh congratulations! Is she domesticated?"

My friend was like "actually I don't know what that means..." at which point my mom explained it's cooking/baking/etc. When he told her that she's a banker my mom was all like "that's good too I guess. Well see you boys later."

nudemacusers · « **Reply #31 on:** August 23, 2013, 07:44:59 PM »

Quote from: Creepy Old Guy on August 23, 2013, 07:26:44 PM

Ha. Ha. Ha.

My sister's 22 year old fiance just called me to yell at me for "talking shit behind his back about things I don't know anything about" and proceeded to get even angrier as I laughed in his face for like five minutes. He also told me "to get a real job" which is, really, just fucking precious.

Just retort that the job might not be real, but the money is

Human Snorenado · « **Reply #32 on:** August 23, 2013, 07:46:15 PM »

Quote from: Mr. Gundam on August 23, 2013, 07:42:43 PM

Quote from: Creepy Old Guy on August 23, 2013, 07:26:44 PM
Ha. Ha. Ha.

My sister's 22 year old fiance just called me to yell at me for "talking shit behind his back about things I don't know anything about" and proceeded to get even angrier as I laughed in his face for like five minutes. He also told me "to get a real job" which is, really, just fucking precious.

Saw that on Facebook, I'm waiting for awesome carnival of the stupid.

Fuck that, you're not gonna see shit. I'm not social media friends with those fucking idiots.

Human Snorenado · « **Reply #33 on:** August 23, 2013, 07:47:14 PM »

I can actively FEEL my blood pressure being elevated right now. Jesus fucking shit.

Shadow Mod · « **Reply #34 on:** August 23, 2013, 07:48:15 PM »

Ask him what kind of punk hurts himself painting.

Mr. Gundam · « **Reply #35 on:** August 23, 2013, 07:49:28 PM »

Quote from: Needs More Cowbell on August 23, 2013, 06:48:32 PM

Quote from: macuser3of5 on August 23, 2013, 06:45:46 PM
Dude, my mom got separated from my dad for almost a full year (after he lost his job due to failing a drug test... not sure what drug) and him generally being an abusive asshole, got a job doing real estate with my grandmother, and started actually making more money than before the split. Our relationship was mending, I could visit the house without getting nauseated from fear and anxiety, and everything was going well.

And she still took him back.

Why? She just didn't see eye to eye with my grandmother, they "disagreed over too many things". And she's telling me this, and I'm thinking, well fuck mom, better to disagree than have a chair thrown through a window. But no, she asked my grandmother to move out so he could come back and do whatever. It was at that point I just gave up entirely. She plainly chose him over me and my brothers.

Ugh dude, I'm sorry.

It's shit like this that pisses me off about people who have kids and don't put them first. You gotta make yourself happy and all but you bring a child into this world, you basically said "I am having a human being whom I need to prioritize over myself." Of course plenty of people don't actually believe that statement, so it's all fucked.

Damn straight. My wife and I find time to do our stuff, but kiddo takes priority.

Too bad the people who say "Fuck it! I'm gonna do what I want!" have way more kids than the rational people.

Himu · « **Reply #36 on:** August 23, 2013, 07:51:26 PM »

Creepy. Play some games. Chill down. Go do fun stuff. Give yourself a facial massage. You will feel better.

Mandark · « **Reply #37 on:** August 23, 2013, 07:56:00 PM »

Quote from: Needs More Cowbell on August 23, 2013, 07:48:15 PM

Ask him what kind of punk hurts himself painting.

Eh, I did some (sloppy, paid under-the-table) painting over a summer in my teens, and I'm pretty sure if I did it full time now my body's response would be somewhere on the spectrum from mild kvetching to open rebellion.

Granted, this guy's younger than I am, but I still wouldn't rag on him for getting hurt doing physical labor. Sounds like he's got a plethora of actual deficiencies to go after instead.

Shadow Mod · « **Reply #38 on:** August 23, 2013, 07:57:10 PM »

Quote from: Mandark on August 23, 2013, 07:56:00 PM

Quote from: Needs More Cowbell on August 23, 2013, 07:48:15 PM
Ask him what kind of punk hurts himself painting.

Eh, I did some (sloppy, paid under-the-table) painting over a summer in my teens, and I'm pretty sure if I did it full time now my body's response would be somewhere on the spectrum from mild kvetching to open rebellion.

Granted, this guy's younger than I am, but I still wouldn't rag on him for getting hurt doing physical labor. Sounds like he's got a plethora of actual deficiencies to go after instead.

I can understand getting injured doing just about anything but he seems like the type that will find an excuse to get out of working.

Mr. Gundam · « **Reply #39 on:** August 23, 2013, 07:58:14 PM »

Quote from: Creepy Old Guy on August 23, 2013, 07:46:15 PM

Quote from: Mr. Gundam on August 23, 2013, 07:42:43 PM
Quote from: Creepy Old Guy on August 23, 2013, 07:26:44 PM
Ha. Ha. Ha.

My sister's 22 year old fiance just called me to yell at me for "talking shit behind his back about things I don't know anything about" and proceeded to get even angrier as I laughed in his face for like five minutes. He also told me "to get a real job" which is, really, just fucking precious.

Saw that on Facebook, I'm waiting for awesome carnival of the stupid.

Fuck that, you're not gonna see shit. I'm not social media friends with those fucking idiots.

Good man.

Himu · « **Reply #40 on:** August 23, 2013, 07:59:10 PM »

Any thing simple you do for long periods is a job. Painting all day with a big ass brush could definitely lead to an injury in some way if you're not careful.

nudemacusers · « **Reply #41 on:** August 23, 2013, 07:59:28 PM »

Quote from: Needs More Cowbell on August 23, 2013, 06:48:32 PM

Quote from: macuser3of5 on August 23, 2013, 06:45:46 PM
Dude, my mom got separated from my dad for almost a full year (after he lost his job due to failing a drug test... not sure what drug) and him generally being an abusive asshole, got a job doing real estate with my grandmother, and started actually making more money than before the split. Our relationship was mending, I could visit the house without getting nauseated from fear and anxiety, and everything was going well.

And she still took him back.

Why? She just didn't see eye to eye with my grandmother, they "disagreed over too many things". And she's telling me this, and I'm thinking, well fuck mom, better to disagree than have a chair thrown through a window. But no, she asked my grandmother to move out so he could come back and do whatever. It was at that point I just gave up entirely. She plainly chose him over me and my brothers.

Ugh dude, I'm sorry.

It's shit like this that pisses me off about people who have kids and don't put them first. You gotta make yourself happy and all but you bring a child into this world, you basically said "I am having a human being whom I need to prioritize over myself." Of course plenty of people don't actually believe that statement, so it's all fucked.

Yeah, it was kind of a chilling moment, especially since he was my stepfather and we were her biological kids. I figured I would have some level of priority when it came to push/shove. Of course, it was all predicated on the idea that he was changed blah blah blah, but the next time I visited my younger brother, he told me that our stepdad came into his room at three in the morning and told him how terrible and worthless he was for more than 30 minutes straight. Who the fuck does that, and who turns a blind eye to something like that? That pretty much blew all guilt I had over my feelings of resentment off the map, since I was beginning to realize my mom would minimize anything he did and just not hear it at all. I could go on and on with 18 years of examples, but that was pretty much it for me. I threw them a bone for my wedding since I figured that would be a neutral ground, and nope, same shit. That was ... 6 years ago almost? Haven't touched it since.

To this day she calls every know and then, leaving a voicemail about how she doesn't understand what she did wrong, but that she still loves me etc etc. Whole thing is sick and manipulative.

I could go on and on about this, kind of cathartic heh. I'm pretty much over it at this point, like a bad dream.

Himu · « **Reply #42 on:** August 23, 2013, 08:00:11 PM »

How did he find out you're talking behind back?

Human Snorenado · « **Reply #43 on:** August 23, 2013, 08:04:01 PM »

Because my nephew was over here today when he called my mother to let her know he had quit his most recent job, meaning she's probably going to have to go back to work. When I found out about it I lost my shit in front of my nephew, which admittedly is bad form but you know what? Fuck it. I'm over this shit. It's been going on for like 16 goddamn years with my sister, and it's time for it to fucking stop.

Polari · « **Reply #44 on:** August 23, 2013, 08:05:59 PM »

Quote from: Phoenix Dark on August 23, 2013, 07:44:57 PM

A friend and I were walking out of the gym when my mom suddenly rolled up on us; she was heading to a grocery store that's within the same parking lot area. We were talking, and my friend mentioned that he's engaged/getting married next year. My mom's response: "Oh congratulations! Is she domesticated?"

My friend was like "actually I don't know what that means..." at which point my mom explained it's cooking/baking/etc. When he told her that she's a banker my mom was all like "that's good too I guess. Well see you boys later."

Sounds like your mom's got her priorities straight.

nudemacusers · « **Reply #45 on:** August 23, 2013, 08:06:00 PM »

I'm telling you dude, you need to D.E.N.N.I.S your family, you will go crazy trying to be the referee.

Polari · « **Reply #46 on:** August 23, 2013, 08:07:32 PM »

You need to engage physically?

Human Snorenado · « **Reply #47 on:** August 23, 2013, 08:11:13 PM »

nudemacusers · « **Reply #48 on:** August 23, 2013, 08:11:19 PM »

Shadow Mod · « **Reply #49 on:** August 23, 2013, 08:13:11 PM »

People who can't even be good family members must be awful people in general. Can we put them all on an island? $:-\$

huckleberry · « **Reply #50 on:** August 23, 2013, 08:17:11 PM »

Quote from: Creepy Old Guy on August 23, 2013, 08:04:01 PM

Because my nephew was over here today when he called my mother to let her know he had quit his most recent job, meaning she's probably going to have to go back to work. When I found out about it I lost my shit in front of my nephew, which admittedly is bad form but you know what? Fuck it. I'm over this shit. It's been going on for like 16 goddamn years with my sister, and it's time for it to fucking stop.

Let it all out on them...you will feel better and the older you get that's all that really matters. Fucking truth is supposed to hurt.

Rufus · « **Reply #51 on:** August 23, 2013, 08:19:09 PM »

Quote from: Needs More Cowbell on August 23, 2013, 08:13:11 PM

People who can't even be good family members must be awful people in general. Can we put them all on an island? $:-\$

You'd be surprised. With strangers and friends, there's actually some degree of shame and face saving going on, because they won't forgive everything or carry your ass for you.