1,000+ Pages of NeoGAF: The Story of Wasted Lives and Hardcore Salt

[zomgee]

dude posted it again
http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1078880

Like and subscribe for more hard hitting videos!

Jesus I hate upvote culture.

[Kara]

dude posted it again
http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1078880

Did this knickerbocker never watch Old Yeller or something.

[I'm a Puppy!]

Take games as serious social commentary brehs.

[Kara]

Chess, ultimately a game of regicide, instilled in me a fierce republican spirit from a young age. Sic semper tyrannis.

[thisismyusername]

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jonah_Falcon

spoiler (click to show/hide)

[close]

Andy-kun, you go first and tell us if you could take it.

[Himu]

I googled his name plus "penis".



I mean, even though his dick is long....I...

I dunno. How thick is it? If it's just long, I don't know. Short and stocky is more attractive and sexy and practical than a 13 inch schlong that has average girth.

[ZephyrFate]

Doesn't even matter -- the dude is so completely not attractive. Like, come on fate, give an attractive man a penis that huge.

[Vertigo]

Thread: What are your favourite memories of Satoru Iwata?

It's so inappropriate at the moment, but the GIF of him rising from the casket was always awesome because it was so appropriate given his guiding Nintendo back to the top.

http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showpost.php?p=171722635&postcount=5

[Himu]

That's what I was saying. I just...I don't find him attractive on any level. It's like kryptonite. Even the big penis is a no go. His dick sounds absolutely scary.

[Arbys Roast Beef Sandwich]

There's a pretty funny video of him on Stern getting awkwardly groped by George Takei

super nsfw GIF: http://bearcn.tumblr.com/post/76176779807/george-takei-creepily-jerking-off-jonah-falcon-on

[Himu]

There's a pretty funny video of him on Stern getting awkwardly groped by George Takei

super nsfw GIF: http://bearcn.tumblr.com/post/76176779807/george-takei-creepily-jerking-off-jonah-falcon-on

[Kara]

Read the dude's bio. Rough life.

When he was ten, an older neighbor told an eighteen-year-old woman about Falcon, and arranged for the two to have sex, which was Falcon's first sexual experience.[1]

[Shaka Khan]

There was a BBC (the channel not goods) documentary from a few years ago about biggest (unsurprisingly, cac) dicks, which heavily focused on Falcon. Even if you ignore his unattractiveness, his dick is barely functional these days, not to mention ugly.

I suspect he either pumps or have one of those weird dick weights fetishes because it seemed like damaged goods, imo. It also touches (lol) on his 15 minutes of fame in the 90s (or was it 80s), where he rolled with a couple of celebs for a hot minute.

I think he lives with his mother or something these days. Possibly playing Nintendo games (RIP Iwata). Which goes to show that size, in the end, doesn't really matter.

Bottom line: He has nothing on BBC (the goods not channel) tbh.

[zomgee]

Bottom line huh

[thisismyusername]

Doesn't even matter -- the dude is so completely not attractive. Like, come on fate, give an attractive man a penis that huge.

Not like it matters. I mean a dick that big seems like it'd be completely dangerous for all parties involved. Man or woman, can you imagine someone trying to take all that? Eesh.

[Take My Breh Away]

Doesn't even matter -- the dude is so completely not attractive. Like, come on fate, give an attractive man a penis that huge.

Not like it matters. I mean a dick that big seems like it'd be completely dangerous for all parties involved. Man or woman, can you imagine someone trying to take all that? Eesh.

Life's all about challenges 

[Rufus]

Doesn't even matter -- the dude is so completely not attractive. Like, come on fate, give an attractive man a penis that huge.

Not like it matters. I mean a dick that big seems like it'd be completely dangerous for all parties involved. Man or woman, can you imagine someone trying to take all that? Eesh.

I dunno, I've seen things...

[octopushover]

Was Iwata even sick? What the hell

[Phoenix Dark]

It's only fitting that the biggest cac dick belongs to an uncharismatic ugly dude.

Meanwhile Mandingo/Lex Steel/Bryon Long were always pretty charismatic and good looking dudes (pause). Greatly improved me stroke game too.

[dmj]

It's only fitting that the biggest cac dick belongs to an uncharismatic ugly dude.

Meanwhile Mandingo/Lex Steel/Bryon Long were always pretty charismatic and good looking dudes (pause). Greatly improved me stroke game too.

None of them are good looking, and none of their stroke games are good...

Justin Slayer tho

[thisismyusername]

It's only fitting that the biggest cac dick belongs to an uncharismatic ugly dude.

Meanwhile Mandingo/Lex Steel/Bryon Long were always pretty charismatic and good looking dudes (pause). Greatly improved me stroke game too.

[Phoenix Dark]

It's only fitting that the biggest cac dick belongs to an uncharismatic ugly dude.

Meanwhile Mandingo/Lex Steel/Bryon Long were always pretty charismatic and good looking dudes (pause). Greatly improved me stroke game too.

None of them are good looking, and none of their stroke games are good...

Justin Slayer tho

How can you say Lex's stroke game isn't good?

Can't hate on Slayer. That scene with Lily Thai

can we agree Mr Marcus had a wack stroke game? Dude was always on the verge of busting early, having to stop/rest, etc. And fuck him for the syphilis thing

[Mr Gilhaney]

The only big dick male porn star I care for, is Ramon from bang bus. His smile makes me smile.

[sarslip]

i do declare this bore page to be the positively most boriest of pages

[Phoenix Dark]

The only big dick male porn star I care for, is Ramon from bang bus. His smile makes me smile.

Doesn't he do trans porn now?

[Mr Gilhaney]

The only big dick male porn star I care for, is Ramon from bang bus. His smile makes me smile.

Doesn't he do trans porn now?

I have not heard about this. But I am willing to give it a try.

[studyguy]

The only big dick male porn star I care for, is Ramon from bang bus. His smile makes me smile.

Doesn't he do trans porn now?

Doesn't even surprise me PD would be up on this kind of info.
 

[Phoenix Dark]

blame The Coli

I didn't like Ramon when he was fucking the hottest chicks in the game, why would I care now? Dude is ugly as fuck and it ruins my enjoyment of the scenes. Like in an intrusive way, similar to how I can't fux with Wesley Pipes scenes. It becomes more about him than the chick.

[brob]

If I remember correctly, isn't ramon the dude who

1) got a venereal disease looking body-mod in his dick?

2) got arrested on some animal abuse charges (literal cockfighting??)?



you don't need this man in your life, Mr Gilhaney... let me save u~

[Mr Gilhaney]

The animal abuse charges was him forgetting some goats and other animals in a van, no actual cock fights. He had to ask for a public attorney, as he said he didn't have enough money. I have sympathy for him and other male porn actors, that can't earn good money. I feel like it's my duty to support him.

His dick looks like some weird growth you would find in the STALKER games. Which got its own charm.

[dmj]

Ramon IS offensively ugly and I've never watched a scene because of that.

PD:

Re: Mr Marcus, that dude is the pits, and all around disgusting for the std mess.

[bork]

http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showpost.php?p=171763751&postcount=8834

from the passing of one 50+ year old entity to another

I wanna tell you how it's gonna be
You're gonna give your love to me
I wanna love you night and day
You know my love will not fade away
You know my love will not fade away
Not fade away

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S7sNSduf7Gc

[Joe Molotov]

http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showpost.php?p=171763751&postcount=8834

from the passing of one 50+ year old entity to another

I wanna tell you how it's gonna be
You're gonna give your love to me
I wanna love you night and day
You know my love will not fade away
You know my love will not fade away
Not fade away

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S7sNSduf7Gc

Not like this, Drinky. 

[Kara]

The animal abuse charges was him forgetting some goats and other animals in a van, no actual cock fights. He had to ask for a public attorney, as he said he didn't have enough money. I have sympathy for him and other male porn actors, that can't earn good money. I feel like it's my duty to support him.

His dick looks like some weird growth you would find in the STALKER games. Which got its own charm.

./' stand by ur man~ ./'

[Phoenix Dark]

I read that Mr Marcus was riding in a cab with some pornstar. They had just left a club when they picked up a random chick who was at the club. They began kissing in the backseat and Marcus took off her panties and ate her out. Two days later he was scheduled for a porn shoot.

Ava Devine is the same way apparently, fucking anyone and anything.

[Van Cruncheon]

http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showpost.php?p=171763751&postcount=8834

from the passing of one 50+ year old entity to another

I wanna tell you how it's gonna be
You're gonna give your love to me
I wanna love you night and day
You know my love will not fade away
You know my love will not fade away
Not fade away

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S7sNSduf7Gc

Not like this, Drinky. 

[dmj]

I'm so confused by people caring so much about Iwata dying and crying about it... I just can't muster the emotion to care much about someone I don't personally know dying. I can feel empathy for his friends/family, but all the people that are actually sad he died... 

[bork]

I'm so confused by people caring so much about Iwata dying and crying about it... I just can't muster the emotion to care much about someone I don't personally know dying. I can feel empathy for his friends/family, but all the people that are actually sad he died... 

He was like a celebrity to video game nerds, so I can understand feeling bummed about it and being sad.

[Mr Gilhaney]

To be honest I was pretty fucking bummed when Ryan Davis died. So many hours listening to that fucker on the bombcast. So yeah I get it. But that doesn't make me stop cringing at all that bad fan art they are already busy creating, or yelling at Evilore because he's not quick enough to get some Iwata logo up there.

[Am_I_Anonymous]

Stop posting dic pics you fucking morons....jesus....




There

[Phoenix Dark]

Imagine being more emotionally invested in a company than a living person or your family. Imagine only experiencing amygdala-centered emotions in relation to anime/manga/videogames/Mt Dew shortages. Such a person would no doubt grow close to the creators of the only things that bring him joy in life and think of them as friends.

[mormapope]

Ryan Davis's death bummed me out, this death is a bummer as well. Both died in July as well.

My first family dog and my brother also died in July, in the same year.

 

[nachobro]

http://neogaf.com/forum/showpost.php?p=171759530&postcount=418 

[studyguy]

Get emotionally invested in the lives of pornstars and videogame company execs brehs

http://neogaf.com/forum/showpost.php?p=171759530&postcount=418 

 

[Am_I_Anonymous]

http://neogaf.com/forum/showpost.php?p=171759530&postcount=418 

 

[mormapope]

Get emotionally invested in the lives of pornstars and videogame company execs brehs

Some porn star twitters are pretty fucked, so fucked that it makes it hard to jerk off to those same people later.

[Am_I_Anonymous]

Imagine being more emotionally invested in a company than a living person or your family. Imagine only experiencing amygdala-centered emotions in relation to anime/manga/videogames/Mt Dew shortages. Such a person would no doubt grow close to the creators of the only things that bring him joy in life and think of them as friends.

You'd cry or be bummed if Nas died. Iwata worked on a lot of games people enjoyed and a lot of people loved his Iwata asks stuff. I like clowning nintards too, but someone dying from a disease is always sad. And if someone's a public figure chances are some people really liked him.

I'm not broken up about it myself, but I'm not going to hate on people being sad over someone's death when I was really down when Christopher Lee died.

He doesn't know you. Get over it (Not you, that's the message of the day)

[mormapope]

I remember going to a bar with friends to get cheap wings, a friend pointed out that "Tony Soprano died" and we all turned to see "James Gandolfini has passed away" on CNN.

Shit had me shocked, was openly expressing my surprise and bummed outness.

  

[Phoenix Dark]

Imagine being more emotionally invested in a company than a living person or your family. Imagine only experiencing amygdala-centered emotions in relation to anime/manga/videogames/Mt Dew shortages. Such a person would no doubt grow close to the creators of the only things that bring him joy in life and think of them as friends.

You'd cry or be bummed if Nas died. Iwata worked on a lot of games people enjoyed and a lot of people loved his Iwata asks stuff. I like clowning nintards too, but someone dying from a disease is always sad. And if someone's a public figure chances are some people really liked him.

I'm not broken up about it myself, but I'm not going to hate on people being sad over someone's death when I was really down when Christopher Lee died.

I'm talking about the people who are deep in grief over this as if the man is a relative. Being sad is something else entirely, and completely understandable.

[zomgee]

Nah, I'm not going to rail on people too much for their investment in Iwata. Guy was a long time figure in a dominant gaming company responsible for the formative years of a lot of people. When Phil Hartman died I was really sad and printed out a picture of Troy McClure with a list of all his goofy film titles and hung it next to my desk for a couple days.

spoiler (click to show/hide)

[close]

So I get it. I do think there's taking it too far... but thisisneogaf.gif, etc.

I always reserve the right to laugh at bad art, though.

[dmj]

I'd be pretty broken up if Rihanna died.

[Tasty]

http://neogaf.com/forum/showpost.php?p=171759530&postcount=418 

Holy shit

[studyguy]

I'm not gonna be out here trying to cop internet points pointing out how I'm crying during the entirety of my Mother 2 replay.
I can understand being bummed to the point of tears, but some of these posts are just outlandish when you read through it.

[Mr Gilhaney]

I cried when that boy you controlled in Mother 3 was raped by the magypsies. Horrific scene, that showed games can be art and portray adult matters.

[Yulwei]

I was shocked and bummed out when I first heard about Iwata. I don't follow nintendo stuff at all so I didn't know he had been battling with some illness.

That said.. all that fanart of mario/luigi being sad is fucking ridiculous.

[Kara]

Get emotionally invested in the lives of pornstars and videogame company execs brehs

Some porn star twitters are pretty fucked, so fucked that it makes it hard to jerk off to those same people later.

Something to battle my pornographic ennui.

[studyguy]

I cried when that boy you controlled in Mother 3 was raped by the magypsies. Horrific scene, that showed games can be art and portray adult matters.

I was like 10 or 11 when I first played Heart of Darkness on PS1.
Only game I can recall in my life that fucked me up something awful due to those death scenes.



 
This shit was E for everyone, the fuck. Had the kid getting his neck snapped, ripped in two, etc
Also had dudes lighting up and drawings of naked muppet women in it too.
Weird ass fucking game.

[Mr Gilhaney]

One of my first games for PS1 was Resident Evil 1. I had already seen enough shit by the time I got to heart of darkness. Remember buying RE1 when I was 8 or 9, there were two guys behind the counter. One said "you know this is really scary right" and the other before I could even answer, interrupted with "yeah that's why he wants it dumb ass"

What a great game it was. I was too young to even realize how bad the voice acting was.

[studyguy]

One of my first games for PS1 was Resident Evil 1. I had already seen enough shit by the time I got to heart of darkness. Remember buying RE1 when I was 8 or 9, there were two guys behind the counter. One said "you know this is really scary right" and the other before I could even answer, interrupted with "yeah that's why he wants it dumb ass"

What a great game it was. I was too young to even realize how bad the voice acting was.

I remember thinking the first zombie looked like a circus clown.


Simpler times

[Joe Molotov]

When I got a PS1 for Christmas in 1998, Heart of Darkness was one of the games I got with it (along with FF7 and Spyro).