Author Topic: haha apple is having a press conference (Read 4567 times)

Eschaton · « **on:** March 09, 2015, 02:35:21 PM »

Something about a watch I reckon

Am_I_Anonymous · « **Reply #1 on:** March 09, 2015, 02:35:41 PM »

Android Guy here.

Don't care.

Regret not investing when I had a chance though....damnit.

Am_I_Anonymous · « **Reply #2 on:** March 09, 2015, 02:57:04 PM »

Spend 550 dollars on a watch but only have 150 dollars of fun money a month brehs...

Human Snorenado · « **Reply #3 on:** March 09, 2015, 02:57:53 PM »

New macbooks don't have fans, will double as dick roasters

Am_I_Anonymous · « **Reply #4 on:** March 09, 2015, 02:59:46 PM »

Excuse me, does the GAF say you can buy an apple watch for 10,000 fucking dollars? It got a motor in it?

edit:

10k for this shit?

Mr. Gundam · « **Reply #5 on:** March 09, 2015, 03:02:57 PM »

HBO Now exclusive to Apple devices. The butthurt is strong.

Brehvolution · « **Reply #6 on:** March 09, 2015, 03:04:08 PM »

Apple watch: For those who just can't be bothered to take your phone out of your pocket or purse.

ToxicAdam · « **Reply #7 on:** March 09, 2015, 03:11:56 PM »

I'm done doubting Apple. I scoffed at the Ipod release and even moreso at the Ipad release. Eventually I came to own both products.

Tasty · « **Reply #8 on:** March 09, 2015, 03:13:05 PM »

Quote from: Mr. Gundam on March 09, 2015, 03:02:57 PM

HBO Now exclusive to Apple devices. The butthurt is strong.

*Timed exclusive

Am_I_Anonymous · « **Reply #9 on:** March 09, 2015, 03:13:15 PM »

If I'm going to drop 10k on a watch it's going to be this:

Not a glorified wristband that can tell me how much fucking money I'm allowed to spend every month. I'm going to wear a watch that says fuck your discretionary spending, Failure.

Yeti · « **Reply #10 on:** March 09, 2015, 03:20:27 PM »

This doesn't interest me, but I will probably bite after a few yearly screen size increases.

spoiler (click to show/hide)

[close]

Crash Dummy · « **Reply #11 on:** March 09, 2015, 03:39:58 PM »

Quote from: Human Snorenado on March 09, 2015, 02:57:53 PM

New macbooks don't have fans, will double as dick roasters

penis panini

huckleberry · « **Reply #12 on:** March 09, 2015, 03:41:32 PM »

So does purchasing the Apple Watch Edition with only the 38mm bezel and sports strap give you Operating Thetan level automatically or does it still leave you in Clear?

nudemacusers · « **Reply #13 on:** March 09, 2015, 03:45:35 PM »

gold macbook

I do like the look of the gold watch/rose wristband but it violates my silver-toned metal only policy and is of course 17k lol.

Am_I_Anonymous · « **Reply #14 on:** March 09, 2015, 03:46:29 PM »

The most important question...Is candy crush functional on this device?

nudemacusers · « **Reply #15 on:** March 09, 2015, 03:48:16 PM »

Quote from: Am_I_Anonymous on March 09, 2015, 03:46:29 PM

The most important question...Is candy crush functional on this device?

no but you can send dick doodles to people

Am_I_Anonymous · « **Reply #16 on:** March 09, 2015, 03:49:38 PM »

Quote from: nudemacusers on March 09, 2015, 03:48:16 PM

Quote from: Am_I_Anonymous on March 09, 2015, 03:46:29 PM
The most important question...Is candy crush functional on this device?
no but you can send dick doodles to people

Well this is great news. I'll preorder one right now

Prepare for many noodles, mac. We actually need nationwide fulltime adaptable bluetooth so I can real time draw my penises at my leisure.

Brehvolution · « **Reply #17 on:** March 09, 2015, 03:57:51 PM »

http://store.apple.com/us/buy-watch/apple-watch-edition?product=MJ3G2LL/A&step=detail#

nudemacusers · « **Reply #18 on:** March 09, 2015, 04:26:46 PM »

Quote from: Brehvolution on March 09, 2015, 03:57:51 PM

http://store.apple.com/us/buy-watch/apple-watch-edition?product=MJ3G2LL/A&step=detail#

it's a very pleasing color combo but the band should be croc or pebbled imo.

Brehvolution · « **Reply #19 on:** March 09, 2015, 04:28:02 PM »

How do you think it would effect the $17k price tag?

nudemacusers · « **Reply #20 on:** March 09, 2015, 04:33:03 PM »

well, real croc? it would go up a couple grand most likely. pebbling doesn't really add much to the price IME. they should do something other than the typical bland apple leather.

Kara · « **Reply #21 on:** March 09, 2015, 05:06:47 PM »

Quote from: Dufus on March 09, 2015, 05:03:47 PM

the vast majority of luxury watches look like overly complicated shitty looking poorly designed bits of quickly put-together-pieces of shiny scrap metal

real talk

When you're using Swatch movements you gotta distract rubes any way you can to get that paper.

TakingBackSunday · « **Reply #22 on:** March 09, 2015, 05:56:00 PM »

those new macbooks are sexy as fuck

fistfulofmetal · « **Reply #23 on:** March 09, 2015, 06:06:57 PM »

overpriced junk

Madrun Badrun · « **Reply #24 on:** March 09, 2015, 06:18:28 PM »

They are making it increasingly hard to use macbooks as linux substitutes. I probably won't get one ever again.

Human Snorenado · « **Reply #25 on:** March 09, 2015, 06:21:21 PM »

Quote from: BrandNew on March 09, 2015, 05:56:00 PM

those new macbooks are sexy as fuck

Hope they're $1600 sexy for something with a core m processor

Supermanisdead · « **Reply #26 on:** March 09, 2015, 06:22:32 PM »

hbo now exclusive to apple tv....

and ios...

and streaming on browsers.

so really its just not on consoles. at least for a few months.

Madrun Badrun · « **Reply #27 on:** March 09, 2015, 06:26:32 PM »

browsers: the original app

dkdk · « **Reply #28 on:** March 09, 2015, 06:28:44 PM »

apple's a fuckin trip man. a comedian wouldn't even think of them selling a watch for 17k.

also am i tripping or do the new macbooks not have a headphone jack.

Madrun Badrun · « **Reply #29 on:** March 09, 2015, 06:32:56 PM »

I think they have one jack that gets used by everything.

spoiler (click to show/hide)

Kind of like your mom.

[close]

I think the extra input thing is like 80$

spoiler (click to show/hide)

Also like your mom

[close]

Positive Touch · « **Reply #30 on:** March 09, 2015, 06:34:52 PM »

was there a subset of nerds that really liked those old Tiger Electronics watches it something? I just don't see how you can wear a fucking ladies watch with an iPod nano on it and not look like a dingus. I mean if people will buy Google glasses then I'm sure people will buy this, but I can't see it taking off.

TakingBackSunday · « **Reply #31 on:** March 09, 2015, 06:42:48 PM »

I think it'll take off, but I do think they won't really "nail" it until the third generation

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #32 on:** March 09, 2015, 06:58:20 PM »

Still don't understand the point. The smart phone makes a smart watch redundant. The only reason you wear a watch today is to look more professional, and lord knows no one will take you seriously while wearing a flimsy ass Power Ranger watch.

Huff · « **Reply #33 on:** March 09, 2015, 07:01:04 PM »

I'd rather have a power ranger's watch

kick51 · « **Reply #34 on:** March 09, 2015, 07:11:39 PM »

last time i said "i don't get it" it was the ipad, so i'm just keeping my mouth shut. obv the $15k one is dummmbb, but as someone pointed out, it makes the $400 ones seem cheaper.

Great Rumbler · « **Reply #35 on:** March 09, 2015, 07:32:52 PM »

I get the appeal of smart phones and tablets, but a smart watch seems like a much smaller potential market. On the other hand, Pebble's second Kickstarter has already pulled down $17 million, so what do I know?

Steve Contra · « **Reply #36 on:** March 09, 2015, 07:42:33 PM »

Pebble's Kickstarter still puts it squarely in the niche market for electronics. Apple will be the first real test.

Eel O'Brian · « **Reply #37 on:** March 09, 2015, 08:04:19 PM »

Tech sites last year: "Smart watches such as Samsung's latest offering just seem superfluous to the smart phones one already uses on a daily basis."

Tech sites just a few hours ago: "Apple's smart watch is a synchrony of form and function, one which provides the iphone with an essential partner you didn't even know you were missing until now. They continue to amaze."

nudemacusers · « **Reply #38 on:** March 09, 2015, 08:05:49 PM »

yeah i can't imagine apple being pleased with 17 million.

still not sold on the concept; the keynote/marketing demo just seemed like a slightly more convenient phone.

Dickie Dee · « **Reply #39 on:** March 09, 2015, 08:12:20 PM »

Smart watches would make sense if everyone still wore watches even as some sort of vestigial accessory.

But who actually wants to wear a fucking watch? Especially some big dumb looking one.

huckleberry · « **Reply #40 on:** March 09, 2015, 08:24:20 PM »

Quote from: Eel O'Brian on March 09, 2015, 08:04:19 PM

Tech sites last year: "Smart watches such as Samsung's latest offering just seem superfluous to the smart phones one already uses on a daily basis."

Tech sites just a few hours ago: "Apple's smart watch is a synchrony of form and function, one which provides the iphone with an essential partner you didn't even know you were missing until now. They continue to amaze."

*checks The Verge*

yep.

Kara · « **Reply #41 on:** March 09, 2015, 08:47:19 PM »

Quote from: Phoenix Dark on March 09, 2015, 06:58:20 PM

Still don't understand the point. The smart phone makes a smart watch redundant. The only reason you wear a watch today is to look more professional, and lord knows no one will take you seriously while wearing a flimsy ass Power Ranger watch.

Not quite, the only reason to wear one (if you're not going to be without a mobile for a prolonged period) is to conspicuously display your wealth. That can make you look professional, or it can make you look like a dorkasaurus (e.g. the desktop diver).

spoiler (click to show/hide)

My best watch is a diving watch.

[close]

Mr. Gundam · « **Reply #42 on:** March 09, 2015, 09:51:56 PM »

Quote from: Tasty Meat on March 09, 2015, 03:13:05 PM

Quote from: Mr. Gundam on March 09, 2015, 03:02:57 PM
HBO Now exclusive to Apple devices. The butthurt is strong.

*Timed exclusive

I'm a highrollin' don't give a fuck cable subscriber with HBO. Clearly I don't care and just like to see people get mad online .

chronovore · « **Reply #43 on:** March 09, 2015, 10:30:19 PM »

HBO Go doesn’t have enough total content that it’s worth US$15/month. The exclusivity is probably for existing contracts with cable distributors.

That watch - man, the only thing I can think of worse than buying first-generation Apple hardware would be paying a premium price for some kind of luxury item which also happens to be first-gen Apple hardware.

huckleberry · « **Reply #44 on:** March 09, 2015, 10:38:16 PM »

http://www.theverge.com/2015/3/9/8176793/apple-watch-precision-accuracy-timekeeping

all those words man. every last one.

Kara · « **Reply #45 on:** March 09, 2015, 11:02:11 PM »

If some sort of Butlerian Jihad took out all the time-keeping satellites and servers, your Apple Watch would be useless anyway. This is how all smartwatches work.

Great Rumbler · « **Reply #46 on:** March 09, 2015, 11:03:39 PM »

Quote from: huckleberry on March 09, 2015, 10:38:16 PM

http://www.theverge.com/2015/3/9/8176793/apple-watch-precision-accuracy-timekeeping

Eel O'Brian · « **Reply #47 on:** March 09, 2015, 11:17:51 PM »

Quote from: huckleberry on March 09, 2015, 10:38:16 PM

http://www.theverge.com/2015/3/9/8176793/apple-watch-precision-accuracy-timekeeping

all those words man. every last one.

They are ripping that dude a new one in the comments

Yeti · « **Reply #48 on:** March 09, 2015, 11:42:13 PM »

Quote from: Phoenix Dark on March 09, 2015, 06:58:20 PM

Still don't understand the point. The smart phone makes a smart watch redundant. The only reason you wear a watch today is to look more professional, and lord knows no one will take you seriously while wearing a flimsy ass Power Ranger watch.

Ugh, who has the time or energy to bother taking your phone out of your pocket anymore

Mr. Gundam · « **Reply #49 on:** March 09, 2015, 11:45:01 PM »

Quote from: Yeti on March 09, 2015, 11:42:13 PM

Quote from: Phoenix Dark on March 09, 2015, 06:58:20 PM
Still don't understand the point. The smart phone makes a smart watch redundant. The only reason you wear a watch today is to look more professional, and lord knows no one will take you seriously while wearing a flimsy ass Power Ranger watch.

Ugh, who has the time or energy to bother taking your phone out of your pocket anymore

That was actually a defense I heard in favor of the product this morning on NPR.

kick51 · « **Reply #50 on:** March 09, 2015, 11:55:23 PM »

Quote from: huckleberry on March 09, 2015, 10:38:16 PM

http://www.theverge.com/2015/3/9/8176793/apple-watch-precision-accuracy-timekeeping

all those words man. every last one.

holy fuckin shit what the fuck am I reading?!

I'm a Puppy! · « **Reply #51 on:** March 10, 2015, 12:09:37 AM »

Goddamn it people. Has no one watch the connections episode about how technology traps us? I mean it's the FIRST FUCKING EPISODE!

nudemacusers · « **Reply #52 on:** March 10, 2015, 12:43:14 AM »

The best comment on our relationship with time in the modern era was already done by Hermes. Sorry verge/Apple

http://www.ablogtowatch.com/hermes-le-temps-suspendu-watch-why-do-you-suspend-time/

True mechanical too

Kara · « **Reply #53 on:** March 10, 2015, 12:47:59 AM »

Gonna have to dock that one for not being called "À la recherche du temps suspendu."

nudemacusers · « **Reply #54 on:** March 10, 2015, 12:53:49 AM »

Yeah cuz that'll look nice on a watch face

nudemacusers · « **Reply #55 on:** March 10, 2015, 12:59:33 AM »

Lol that verge took several paragraphs to say nothing. I could do that!

Tasty · « **Reply #56 on:** March 10, 2015, 01:13:47 AM »

Rufus · « **Reply #57 on:** March 10, 2015, 01:17:07 AM »

I wish we could know how many of those will be paid by student loans. I'm guessing at least half.

Kara · « **Reply #58 on:** March 10, 2015, 01:21:52 AM »

Quote from: nudemacusers on March 10, 2015, 12:53:49 AM

Yeah cuz that'll look nice on a watch face

I meant the name of the article.

pilonv1 · « **Reply #59 on:** March 10, 2015, 06:34:51 AM »

Quote from: Tasty Meat on March 10, 2015, 01:13:47 AM

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Looks like the Nintendo Wii U of smart watches

News:

Author Topic: haha apple is having a press conference (Read 4567 times)

Eschaton