No. It's not ok. Fix your shit! (AKA STFU IDGAF)

[I'm a Puppy!]

Man, there's just been a whole slew of this "I got issues but it's just fine!" thinking.

Like people being like "I'm overweight, manic depressive, bitchy to everyone I know, sorta dumb, lazy and passive aggressive. But I'm a good special person and you should love me as I am." Look, having grown up mormon I know better than most the toxicity of trying to live up to an impossible standard and the importance of accepting people as they are. But come on, fix your shit.

You fat? Hit up a gym
You dumb? Get smarter
You manic depressive? See a therapist and a doctor.

Being accepted as you are doesn't mean you get to do nothing to better yourself.

Especially from my women friends I hear the whole "If you can't put up with me at my worst, you don't deserve me at my best." shit and then a ton of complaining that they can't find Mr. Right. I get this from some of my guy friends too, but not as much. And this kind of shit just gets under my skin. If your M.O. is 5 days of bitch to the world and then 1 day of slightly nicer than the average person, then don't be fucking surprised when everyone is like 

Yes, love is about accepting people as they are. But it's also about always making yourself better for those you love. Not being like "Haha you love me. I can be a lazy ass now." And if you don't have someone that loves you, then be someone you'd want to love. My god people. Get it together.

[benjipwns]

[nudemacusers]

i just want my dad to call me

[Steve Contra]

i just want my dad to call me

He called you a bum last time I spoke to him.  Does that count?

[Nibel]

i just want my dad to call me

bonjour my son how are you

[Madrun Badrun]

Ummm I don't post on the internet for reality checks.  Now validate my existence by liking my pics in the pics thread.

[thisismyusername]

You manic depressive? See a therapist and a doctor.

You think I'm not doing that, bitch tits? It helps, but it doesn't change the situation which feeds into a feedback loop, of feeling bad.

i just want my dad to call me

bonjour my son how are you

You mean: Hola, mi hijo. ¿que tal?

[Positive Touch]

uh yeah dude I think the message is more about not railing on people for what they can't change, and for having a little compassion for them. it's usually pretty obvious when someone's having a hard time vs when they're just a dickhead.

[Kara]

Yeah, idk why a mood disorder is being clumped in with fitness and smarts. Even if you recover from an episode, the odds are something like 1 in 2 that you'll experience another. It's more like the flu than a character issue, though given the amount of self-diagnosis in the world I can see why it's not viewed like a condition at large.

[Phoenix Dark]

i just want my dad to call me

[StealthFan]

i'll get on it, cochise.

[nudemacusers]

i just want my dad to call me

He called you a bum last time I spoke to him.  Does that count?

I knew he ran out on my mom for young cacmen, no need to rub it in.

[thisismyusername]

uh yeah dude I think the message is more about not railing on people for what they can't change, and for having a little compassion for them. it's usually pretty obvious when someone's having a hard time vs when they're just a dickhead.

It's completely a different ballpark though. Mental issues aren't a "lawyer up, hit the gym, delete Facebook" issue like Ronito wants to make it out to be. I'm not saying Ronito's point doesn't have merit, but to lump mental health issues in as "something that can be snap-fixed if you really want it to be!" isn't something I agree with.

Yeah, idk why a mood disorder is being clumped in with fitness and smarts. Even if you recover from an episode, the odds are something like 1 in 2 that you'll experience another. It's more like the flu than a character issue, though given the amount of self-diagnosis in the world I can see why it's not viewed like a condition at large.

Exactly. It's pretty much:

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Or specifically:

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You're fat? Yes, that's a (possibly) changeable thing and I agree with Ronito that it's something you should work toward if you're unhappy. You want to learn something, go back to school? Possible, though them debits.

Where I disagree though?

"You're depressed? LOL JUST GET THERAPY AND YOU'LL BE FIXED 'KAY?"

[I'm a Puppy!]

Oh having a wife that had post partum depression I get that it's not as simple as going to a therapist and being like "'sall fixed now!"
But it takes work.

Same thing with overweight issues. My wife has some health problems that make it difficult for her to lose weight. But she still tries. She still exercises. She still takes care of herself. Is she model thin? No. But do I complain? Absolutely not. Because I know she's working on it and is trying to better herself. Whereas I know some people who get married, gain weight and don't do shit because they just expect their spouse to accept them.

I'm not saying things can just get up and be fixed, but I am saying you do have to try. Depression is a sticky widget though, I'll admit. Because part of it is that you don't want to try.

[Nibel]

Honestly, OP you come off as naive; maybe the solution isn't that easy for them. You act as if overweight people for example don't hit the gym because they want to stay overweight when it easily can be financial/time/anxiety issues that are way bigger issues and way harder to solve

Humans are way too complex piles of shit tbh

[Cheddahz]

i just want my dad to call me

[toku]

fixed2bebroken

[Kara]

Taking your experience with a mood disorder and applying it to other mood disorders isn't really a good idea. Postpartum depression has a good prognosis with treatment; both polars are disabilities you experience moments of remission from.

The last time I saw my shrink they thanked me for always being compliant and willing to be a pharmacological Soviet space dog; I guarantee if you ran a long-term study of their patients I score far lower in improvement during care than their more flippant patients.

[brawndolicious]

I've never had anyone tell me to accept their personal flaws, only professional ones relating to laziness and incompetence. This could mean that I lack enough close relationships which makes me depressed and you just have to accept it Ronito.

Also I think weight problems are more due to action than inaction and that's very tough since when your fat levels are high, the hormonal response to hunger is actually stronger (because of leptin or ghrelin I forget)  so that's why it's a lot easier to maintain your current weight than to lose pounds, and also because it probably takes months to see significant losses which is frustrating.

[Huff]

My desktop blue screened. I'm really trying to fix it. I just can't. Guess I'll go to the gym

[Atramental]

I can admire the "fix your shit" mentality on a basic level.  It's what drove me to lose 30 pounds and get better at my job.

But not everyone's problems are that simple to solve. Especially when those problems are in the realm of (severe) mental illness.

[recursivelyenumerable]

I don't think I really complain about my issues very much anymore but it's not like not complaining has improved anything.

[Olivia Wilde Homo]

Most people are in ruts of some kind and the deeper you're in them, the harder it is to get out.

I usually just tune them out.  If they want to turn things around, they will.  If not, it's their life.

In the office, I find martyr complexes to be 100x more annoying.

[king of the internet]

Why bother

[Huff]

No sympathy for my broken computer  :'(

[Phoenix Dark]

A friend of mine lost a lot of weight simply by cutting sugar out of her diet. No more candy or pop. She also stopped eating past 8PM. Looks great now.

[Beezy]

Humans are way too complex piles of shit tbh

[Kara]

No sympathy for my broken computer  :'(

It can pull itself up by its diode straps. :smugbert:

[Rahxephon91]

Fuck you, pay me.

[Rufus]

No sympathy for my broken computer  :'(

Aw. Bluescreens are the worst. Try the GAF tech support thread, there are very knowledgeable people there. I assume you've done the most basic stuff, like memtest. Fulty RAM is probably the best you can hope for.

[kick51]

hey everyone, stop being dumb and just do thing!  hope that helps *runs away*

[Am_I_Anonymous]

I'm a big fan of pulling up your big boy pants and getting shit done but lumping in mental issues with the others is pretty stupid.

[octopushover]

born with down's? stop fucking up!
no arms? pull up your pants you lazy bum!
live in syria? get the fuck out of the way of the bullets idiot!

[I'm a Puppy!]

Yes. Fix your shit.

[Kara]

I don't ride a fixie, sorry.

Though I do agree that they're shit.

[I'm a Puppy!]

You guys misunderstand.  I'm not blaming people for having Issues or shortcomings.  We all live imperfect lives. What I am complaining about is when people just expect everyone to be fine with you doing nothing about it. Like I said people be  Being a bitch to everyone and saying, "I ain't changing for anyone! " then being like,  "Why don't I have any friends?!" Or a guy who is a neckbeard that only plays games all day complaining that he can't get a date.

[zomgee]

You guys misunderstand.  I'm not blaming people for having Issues or shortcomings.  We all live imperfect lives. What I am complaining about is when people just expect everyone to be fine with you doing nothing about it. Like I said people be  Being a bitch to everyone and saying, "I ain't changing for anyone! " then being like,  "Why don't I have any friends?!" Or a guy who is a neckbeard that only plays games all day complaining that he can't get a date.

This all requires effort. Hard work. I've done enough by getting up. And furthermore how else can I be special and different if I don't tell you about my self-diagnosed problems? I can't earn it, so I deserve it.

[Am_I_Anonymous]

You guys misunderstand.  I'm not blaming people for having Issues or shortcomings.  We all live imperfect lives. What I am complaining about is when people just expect everyone to be fine with you doing nothing about it. Like I said people be  Being a bitch to everyone and saying, "I ain't changing for anyone! " then being like,  "Why don't I have any friends?!" Or a guy who is a neckbeard that only plays games all day complaining that he can't get a date.

[Rufus]

You guys misunderstand.  I'm not blaming people for having Issues or shortcomings.  We all live imperfect lives. What I am complaining about is when people just expect everyone to be fine with you doing nothing about it.

Honestly I don't think it's my right to demand anyone fix their shit unless it's directly impacting me somehow. It might be annoying to witness, but that's entirely my problem. It's different if it's about someone you care about one way or another. If it's about society as a whole, that's what health and social policies are for.

As far as wanting to be accepted: I have a tough time trying to think of anyone ever asking me to just accept their flaws, but I don't really meet that many new people any more so...

[recursivelyenumerable]

I keep assuming "I'm a puppy" is Andrex (because andrex is a puppy) and getting v. confused

[I'm a Puppy!]

When in doubt just remember only one of us bottoms. 

[chronovore]

I actually bothered to read the OP and it's somewhat condescending actually, pretty funny


Even some of the other stuff is misleading besides the mental issues shit. For example getting in good shape/healthy for a lot of people can be a difficult path, as it requires;

-access to proper information about nutrition and exercise as well as access to quality produce. Some people simply have minimal access to the latter, and nutritional science/culture is generally speaking cluttered garbage.

-time/energy ; that people working full time and providing for families might not have.

-working against a society with a poor food culture that gets children hooked on addictive sugary at young ages. a culture that people actively rebel against changing (see: reactions to Jamie Oliver / Michelle Obama).


Not saying you shouldn't work as hard as you can to overcome your circumstances, but yeah. Just sort of lazy argumentation, ironically.

I can admire the "fix your shit" mentality on a basic level.  It's what drove me to lose 30 pounds and get better at my job.

But not everyone's problems are that simple to solve. Especially when those problems are in the realm of (severe) mental illness.

You guys misunderstand.  I'm not blaming people for having Issues or shortcomings.  We all live imperfect lives. What I am complaining about is when people just expect everyone to be fine with you doing nothing about it. Like I said people be  Being a bitch to everyone and saying, "I ain't changing for anyone! " then being like,  "Why don't I have any friends?!" Or a guy who is a neckbeard that only plays games all day complaining that he can't get a date.

I guess I’m more like Puppy than some of you guys. Unfortunately I’m operating from a position of raised-poor-but-still-CAC privilege, and Puppy is coming from Suited-Latino Excellence.

We’re all put here on the planet to solve problems, and most of those problems are internal. We’re here to fix our shit.

It feels like there has been an increase in this mentality: incessantly strident, mewling, wailing babies who are not only uninterested in fixing their shit but also insist that the world accept their broken shit as delicate snowflake-ness are missing the fucking point.

Further, wondering Why The Fuck No-One Likes Me when I’ve put zero effort into becoming palatable is the worst. Sure, it’s OK to be unlikable, but being morose over something I’ve cultivated, intentionally or not, is not allowed. “OH NOES, I HAVE TO GO LAY IN THIS BED I’VE MADE.”  :boo-fucking-hoo.gif

[mormapope]

Thought the word shit was shirt, got really confused at OP's post.

[Am_I_Anonymous]

Thought the word shit was shirt, got really confused at OP's post.

[CatsCatsCats]

We’re all put here on the planet to solve problems, and most of those problems are internal. We’re here to fix our shit.

That's just like, your opinion, man. There's alternate opinions, like we're here to promote life.

[Kara]

You can't solve some problems, I guess my last substantive post itt didn't make that explicit enough. You say, "Fix your shit," but you mean, "STFU I DGAF." That's fine, but let's not put lipstick on a pig and try and pass it off as mac's SS2015.

[I'm a Puppy!]

There you Vulvarai, fixed it for you.

[Kara]

#dgaf #millionaires liches.

[Atramental]

You can't solve some problems, I guess my last substantive post itt didn't make that explicit enough. You say, "Fix your shit," but you mean, "STFU I DGAF." That's fine, but let's not put lipstick on a pig and try and pass it off as mac's SS2015.

May I suggest flying down to Peru and setting up an appointment with an Ayahuasca shaman?

It might purge you of your inner demons.

edit: I hope to do this myself someday but... y'know I'm poor as fuck. 

[lennedsay]

I get what chrono is saying. I spend most of my daily human interactions listening to people moan and groan about the same problems over and over without them actually ever doing anything to make it better, and sometimes actively TRYING to make it worse. Luckily I'm pretty close with these people and will flat out call them out on it, but they still never do much to really change their situations. I've come to the conclusion that they either don't hate the situation enough to change it, or they kinda like it in spite of the constant bitching.

I use these two phrases almost daily, which would solve nearly all of their problems:

"Well maybe it would get better if you stopped be such a fucking bitch to [spouse, friend, coworker]."

And

"Maybe you should put out more often."

Usually gets a laugh and gets the point across that their "problem" is self-inflicted and can change.

Being someone with problems that can't be "fixed", hearing other people's "fixable" problems can get annoying sometimes, but otherwise it doesn't affect me so I don't give a shit what they do. I'm supportive if they're trying to make a difference in their life, and if they just want to bitch, I'll be there to deliver bitchy realness back at them if they need it.

[nudemacusers]

but let's not put lipstick on a pig and try and pass it off as mac's SS2015.

[Kara]

You can't solve some problems, I guess my last substantive post itt didn't make that explicit enough. You say, "Fix your shit," but you mean, "STFU I DGAF." That's fine, but let's not put lipstick on a pig and try and pass it off as mac's SS2015.

May I suggest flying down to Peru and setting up an appointment with an Ayahuasca shaman? (Image removed from quote.)

It might purge you of your inner demons. (Image removed from quote.)

edit: I hope to do this myself someday but... y'know I'm poor as fuck. 

Why do drugs when you can go to Imagination Land with books.

[Atramental]

Book : Row boat
Ayahuasca : Spaceship with an FTL drive

You're not going to get to Alpha Centauri (mental well being) in a row boat, comrade Vularai.

spoiler (click to show/hide)

Also, forgive me for these overbearing posts. This shouldn't be something I force on people. 

[close]

[Kara]

If I went to Peru I'd probably do something stupid like fall in with Shining Path instead of go trip out.

There is something to be said for melting your mind now and then. Any bar at closing time is a testament to that.

[chronovore]

We’re all put here on the planet to solve problems, and most of those problems are internal. We’re here to fix our shit.

That's just like, your opinion, man. There's alternate opinions, like we're here to promote life.

\    /
 \  /
  \/

[Yeti]

#dgaf #millionaires liches.

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[Rufus]

I get what chrono is saying. I spend most of my daily human interactions listening to people moan and groan about the same problems over and over without them actually ever doing anything to make it better, and sometimes actively TRYING to make it worse.

That's what phone conversations with my mother are like. The same shit, every time. Unfortunately the advice she gives to other people makes it perfectly clear that she knows how to deal with things, theoretically. She's just incapable of asserting herself, so she gets trampled by everyone. Which must be very frustrating, which is why I get to hear the same old stories.
Ironically enough she used to bitch about her mother doing the same thing. I will break the chain.

spoiler (click to show/hide)

By never pro-creating. I will end this loser bloodline.

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