The Bore Votes: Has any restaurant ever served good chicken parmigiana?

[Kara]

I've been watching a lot of "save my restaurant!" television lately because I enjoy watching people who own homes, are married, and have families cry about being failures because no one wants to eat at a restaurant that serves frozen food that's microwaved and more than anything it's reinforced my belief that no restaurant ever on Earth has ever served a good chicken parmigiana. But I am nothing if not a man of the people and so I put it to the people to decide... before I disregard your findings and purge you.

[Eel O'Brian]

I cook an asskicking chicken parm

[Eel O'Brian]

And no, that's why I learned to cook my own

[studyguy]

What's a chicken parm?
Is that the one where most restaurants take the McChicken patty off and throw cheese on it?

[Eel O'Brian]

What's a chicken parm?
Is that the one where most restaurants take the McChicken patty off and throw cheese on it?

Sure

[Van Cruncheon]

by itself, a prime chicken breast plus quality parmesan cheese fried in olive oil should be really fuckin' good as quick delicious staples go

reality is, though, as the man said: defrost the patty and dump leftover grated cheese and "marinara sauce" on it, sell it for $13.95 (with a side of overbaked bread stix, natch)

[Kara]

I am nothing if not a man of the people

debateable

I roll my eyes out of my head when the classical music station plays Camille Saint-Saens (which it seemingly does every. single. day.) and I suddenly lose my democratic credentials. The game done changed y'all.

[Joe Molotov]

I wouldn't know.

[Kara]

On topic: I ate at an Italian place on Sunday and I'm fairly certain the chicken in my pasta had been frozen. It's bad days for my people in Anorexiafornia. :'(

[ToxicAdam]

There's two things I never order anymore, Chicken Alfredo and Chicke Parm. Because I am always disappointed.

[Phoenix Dark]

The answer is quite clear. Life is shit, and more than likely you'll never attain the best of anything. I have a good job, have money saved, have a beautifully neurotic cat, haven't been shot by the police or a fellow black man, know how to cook, etc. Yet across the board I realize I could be better in every aspect. I could have a better job/promotion, I could have more money saved, I could have a perfect cat, etc. Yet I'm not catching feelings because ultimately I'm on solid ground.

I apply the same to chicken parm. Yea, there's probably some racist Italian grandmother out there who makes perfect chicken parm. But I'll never meet her. I'm perfectly content to have solid chicken parm. Not the best, not the worse, not even middle tier - above average, a solid to good plate. That's what you get at Olive Garden. You can chase perfection all you want, but sooner or later you'll settle down with a decent woman, have average kids, buy a minivan, and enjoy the small things in life so much you don't even think about what could have been. Yea you could have married Jessica Alba and been a billionaire, but instead you have people who love you and little league baseball games to coach. And when your son hits the ball - it won't be a homerun or an RBI, just a hit that travels a couple feet - you'll be able to celebrate with a nice serving of chicken parm at Olive Garden.

[studyguy]

I do like those breadsticks.


This thread has inspired me to go to Olive Garden tomorrow and order chicken parm.
Thanks guys.

[ToxicAdam]

If you're going to go to Olive Garden, just stick to the stuffed Chicken Marsala. It's their best dish.

[Kara]

I roll my eyes out of my head when the classical music station plays Camille Saint-Saens (which it seemingly does every. single. day.) and I suddenly lose my democratic credentials. The game done changed y'all.

I still like The Egyptian

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I'll still even take some of the Animaux over damned Vivaldi or the endless bombardment of Schuberts

[close]

Inverno is top shelf.

[toku]

You are not a man of the people.

[Cheddahz]

I had to go with the Karakand option

[Kara]

I learned to play two classical instruments. 2 privileged 2 furious 4 u

I only dislike stuff that's bad or has an easily discerned origin (we all know where you heard Clair de Lune for the first time). Request hours / donation drives are struggle.

[Brehvolution]

What about veal parm? My favorite dish from an Italian place near me has eggplant on top of prosciutto on top of non breaded veal. Topped with sauce and cheese of course.

Chicken parm :hovmeh

[studyguy]

I fucks with orange chicken.
I don't give a fuck what bastard americanized microwave kitchen it came out of.
I see yall stanning Taco Bell on the regular so lets not front like there's a higher standard out here.

[thisismyusername]

That Blossom smiley. :bandaras

Voted the Karakand option. 

[Kara]

You are not a man of the people.

Please, I read Chinua Achebe's A Man of the People, I think I know the qualities of a man of the people.

[studyguy]

I've never even heard of chicken parmigiana until this thread.

Be obsessed with meat, brehs.

When you boil it down, we're all meat breh.


A nice fat ass is meat.
Some nice tits are meat.
A good steak is meat.
My dick is meat.

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A lot of it

[close]

I find no better substance on earth to be obsessed with than meat.

spoiler (click to show/hide)

Doesn't mean I'm gonna eat it all. Now that I read this back it sounds like I would.
Shit.  My point gets across fuck it.

[close]

[Joe Molotov]

I've never even heard of chicken parmigiana until this thread.

Be obsessed with meat, brehs.

I'd never heard of you until this thread.

[Human Snorenado]

I voted first option, but tbh I prefer eggplant parm, and the answer for that is: yes, Little Italy deli in Wilmington NC makes the 2nd best eggplant parm in the world. My friend's NJ-Italian mother makes the first best, but that family is buttfuckingly crazy, so it's easier to just visit Wilmington and get some there.

[Shaka Khan]

There's two things I never order anymore, Chicken Alfredo and Chicke Parm. Because I am always disappointed.

This guy knows what's up

[Positive Touch]

goddamnit you willingly eat something called soylent so I will hear absolutely no chicken parm badmouthing

[Van Cruncheon]

esch: arroz con pollo. sketch chicken bits and canned mushrooms drenched in some random burrito sauce off the kroger shelf.

i'm a total stanley for it anyhoo

[Kara]

goddamnit you willingly eat something called soylent so I will hear absolutely no chicken parm badmouthing

I'm not badmouthing the dish but the dish at restaurants. I could have just as easily picked spaghetti and meatballs (anything with a ragu that doesn't contain an unusual meat, really) or fettuccine alfredo.

[recursivelyenumerable]

chicken alfredo is usually okay. i'm not sure I've ever had a chicken alfredo that was either particularly good or particularly bad.

[Kara]

Given the limited opportunities we have to dine out, selecting dishes that are OK (in best case scenarios) are major opportunity cost Ls.

[Positive Touch]

I hear Big Jumbo's mom makes a pretty good parm.

not sure if trolling, but yes.... yes she does.

[studyguy]

I'm sorry guys I fucked up.
I went to Olive Garden and had a stuffed Chicken Marsala instead.

It was delicious

[bluemax]

What's a chicken parm?
Is that the one where most restaurants take the McChicken patty off and throw cheese on it?

In experience it sure seems that way.

chicken alfredo is usually okay. i'm not sure I've ever had a chicken alfredo that was either particularly good or particularly bad.

Chicken alfredo at most places is like eating flavored glue.

goddamnit you willingly eat something called soylent so I will hear absolutely no chicken parm badmouthing

I'm not badmouthing the dish but the dish at restaurants. I could have just as easily picked spaghetti and meatballs (anything with a ragu that doesn't contain an unusual meat, really) or fettuccine alfredo.

There is a semi popular Italian place in Venice (California)  called C&O Trattoria that tells you on the menu it uses BARILLA products. Barilla is the shit that's like 1 step up from store brand. Somehow this place costs on average like $12+ for a dish you could make at home for less than $5.

http://www.cotrattoria.com/

http://www.yelp.com/biz/c-and-o-trattoria-marina-del-rey

[Kara]

There is a semi popular Italian place in Venice (California)  called C&O Trattoria that tells you on the menu it uses BARILLA products. Barilla is the shit that's like 1 step up from store brand. Somehow this place costs on average like $12+ for a dish you could make at home for less than $5.

http://www.cotrattoria.com/

http://www.yelp.com/biz/c-and-o-trattoria-marina-del-rey

e: knowing LA it probably has an explicit dress code too

[bluemax]

There is a semi popular Italian place in Venice (California)  called C&O Trattoria that tells you on the menu it uses BARILLA products. Barilla is the shit that's like 1 step up from store brand. Somehow this place costs on average like $12+ for a dish you could make at home for less than $5.

http://www.cotrattoria.com/

http://www.yelp.com/biz/c-and-o-trattoria-marina-del-rey

e: knowing LA it probably has an explicit dress code too

Nah, but if you don't have more than 2 people they make you wait no matter how much seating they got.

You'll note from the reviews that everyone loves the garlic rolls, I swear that's the only reason people really want to go there.

[Kara]

Consecutive episodes of Restaurant: Impossible with Italian restaurants.

Maybe PD is onto something with this Olive Garden staning.

[Purrp Skirrp]

All you can eat buffet at the italian community center

[tiesto]

I'm lactose-intolerant so I don't eat chicken parm but I'm sure at least one of the 2 million Italian restaurants (there's practically one on every street corner) here does a good job with it.

[ToxicAdam]

Consecutive episodes of Restaurant: Impossible with Italian restaurants.

Maybe PD is onto something with this Olive Garden staning.

Watching Restaurant:Impossible with a tablet is the best. While you are watching the show, you can google the place. Read all the horrible Yelp! reviews and then read about it's eventual closing 8-12 months after the show was there. It makes the "happy" ending they spin on every show seem even more tragic.

[seagrams hotsauce]

is this a trick question?

oh nm i get it. the answer is no, there are hole in the wall places that have decent chicken parmesan or even 'chick parm' but any place that lists it as 'parmigiana' is the last option imho

[Kara]

Consecutive episodes of Restaurant: Impossible with Italian restaurants.

Maybe PD is onto something with this Olive Garden staning.

Watching Restaurant:Impossible with a tablet is the best. While you are watching the show, you can google the place. Read all the horrible Yelp! reviews and then read about it's eventual closing 8-12 months after the show was there. It makes the "happy" ending they spin on every show seem even more tragic.

rich dad tips

When a small business gets in the hole on payroll taxes it's (in my limited experience) almost always an irreversible death knell as it demonstrates both bad cash flow and bad management at a fundamental level.

[I'm a Puppy!]

More and more I find myself aligning with vulvarai on things.
 :'(

[Van Cruncheon]

the consummate ascension that comes with perfect cishet self-despite

when no-one can hate you as much as you hate your tedious privileged self, you are truly free

[Kara]

More and more I find myself aligning with vulvarai on things.
 :'(

I am nothing if not a man of the people, despite what my americano drinking, Al Jazeera America reading detractors would have you believe.

[ToxicAdam]

When a small business gets in the hole on payroll taxes it's (in my limited experience) almost always an irreversible death knell as it demonstrates both bad cash flow and bad management at a fundamental level.

That show must be like accounting porn for you. All those businesses that don't even have a balance sheet or any idea what their food costs are.

For some of those businesses, the owners don't even have previous management or restaurant experience. What were you thinking?!

[Steve Contra]

People that get into restaurants with no restaurant experience
People that assume the hours they have to work are the hours the restaurant is open

[Human Snorenado]

People who start restaurants tend to be the "this is my dream, I'ma make it happen because reasons" type. No practical experience whatsoever. I dated a woman who was trying to open her own restaurant and I offered to help her come up with a business plan and she was all "oh I don't need one."

[Steve Contra]

I went to a popup for a restaurant opening shortly.  It was at a cool little spot and it was meant to create buzz and I like the people and all but I was sitting there like please pay me for the wine you bought before you go out of business

[I'm a Puppy!]

People who start restaurants tend to be the "this is my dream, I'ma make it happen because reasons" type. No practical experience whatsoever. I dated a woman who was trying to open her own restaurant and I offered to help her come up with a business plan and she was all "oh I don't need one."

Thanks man.
I just emitted a loud "HA!!" and everyone's thinking I'm crazy (moreso)

[I'm a Puppy!]

Goodnight Squiddy.

[Steve Contra]

Goodnight Squiddy.

goodnight, sweet squiddy, and flights of squiddy sing thee to thy rest

[Kara]

When a small business gets in the hole on payroll taxes it's (in my limited experience) almost always an irreversible death knell as it demonstrates both bad cash flow and bad management at a fundamental level.

That show must be like accounting porn for you. All those businesses that don't even have a balance sheet or any idea what their food costs are.

For some of those businesses, the owners don't even have previous management or restaurant experience. What were you thinking?!

It is. The industries I primarily work with need to have a handle on costing correctly or they lose honest* large sums that are crippling, so seeing so many people who don't even know if a product is profitable blows my mind.

http://m.hollandsentinel.com/article/20131217/NEWS/131219202

This place was so filthy that grease had seeped below the kitchen and destroyed the grout.

*Essentially losses before interest, depreciation and amortization, though in a few unfortunate instances gross losses.