Alright I know now where to avoid entirely the whole trip. 
I've already gathered a list of places to check out. Is this a legit list of good places?
Salumi
Paseo
Nook
Tilikum Place Cafe
Seatown Seabar
Top Pot Coffee/Donuts
EMP Museum
Monorail/Needle
Museum of Flight
Nook shut down over a year ago. Morsel took over their space in the U District and has since opened another location in Ballard. The biscuits aren't exactly like Nook's, but still really good.
Paseo is still good since the closure and reopening, but you should also check out Un Bien. They're cheaper and I think better.
I don't go downtown very often. That's for tourists and people who work down there. The neighborhoods make Seattle what it is. I'd recommend Joule, Westward, Walrus and Carpenter, The Whale Wins, Revel, Staple and Fancy, Brimmer and Heeltap, Holy Mountain Brewery, Fremont Brewing, and Reuben's Brews.