TOSS A COIN TO YOUR WITCHER, O VALLEY OF PLENTY O VALLEY OF PLENTY

[BIONIC]

First season just dropped on Netflix.

Only saw the first episode, but really cool so far.

Good action, music, cinematography, and Henry Cavill’s tight ass in leather

My only experience with the world is just finishing chapter 3 of the first game a couple of hours ago, but seems decently faithful. Never read the books.

Will binge the rest this weekend (eight 1 hour episodes).

[D3RANG3D]

https://www.theguardian.com/tv-and-radio/2019/dec/20/the-witcher-review-netflix-henry-cavill

The Witcher review – swords, sorcerers and supernatural incels

spoiler (click to show/hide)

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[Raist]

According to Streggy-boy, who is rapidly taking on the aura of a medieval incel, she is one of 60 girls accursed and dangerously mutated by an eclipse. The 4chan mage has had many of them killed and autopsied to prove his theory.

 

[Potato]

Watching ep1 now. Seems cool, but there are way too many fantasy tropes being thrown around.

[Raist]

Watching ep1 now. Seems cool, but there are way too many fantasy tropes being thrown around.

What the hell were you expecting from The Witcher

[Potato]

I've played about an hour of Witcher 3 total.

I was ready for a generic fantasy show, but some of this shit is eye-rolling.

Still enjoyed it because it scratches an itch for camp fantasy.

[Raist]

Even the source material is fantasy trope central, with a thick juicy layer of ripping off of other Fantasy classics.

Expect nothing else.

[BIONIC]

Episode 3 was badass.

Really loving the show.

[Brehvolution]

Will binge this weekend. 

[Potato]

Just finished episode 2. So glad this is not just Game of Thrones lite. Definitely has its own identity and feel. Although, I think I'm missing out on a lot of things not having played the games.

[Lonewulfeus]

The fight at the end of episode 1 

[BIONIC]

The “song” at the end of episode 5 is such shit lmao

Anyways, show is still pretty tight.

[thisismyusername]

Never read the books.

Do so.

[Madrun Badrun]

Watched episode 1.  It's good.  I read the first 3 books - which I thought were just OK.  I think this episode would have been better if followed The Lesser Evil storyline a bit more and gave more room to have the ultimate make sense, but it was still good. 

The fight at the end of episode 1 

Ya, this was great.  Midevil John Wick.

[Cerveza mas fina]

Will watch

[Brehvolution]

They should do a whole series based off of the Witcher 3 story line and quests.

[Madrun Badrun]

Episode 2 was good as well. 

[Lonewulfeus]

Just finished episode 3 and I still haven’t seen a single hog yet

[Madrun Badrun]

Just finished episode 2. So glad this is not just Game of Thrones lite. Definitely has its own identity and feel. Although, I think I'm missing out on a lot of things not having played the games.

The stories in the books flesh out the stories more but I won't say you should be missing stuff.  Each of the stories is taking place in different times though, i'm pretty sure which makes things confusing. 

[Madrun Badrun]

Triss is real pretty.  Also her winter cloak is gorgious. 

[Lonewulfeus]

Triss is real pretty.  Also her winter cloak is gorgious.

I can’t not see Maya Rudolph when I look at her, but yea I agree she is quite pretty.

[Madrun Badrun]

That was my exact thought! lol  She's like a less goofy looking Maya Rudolph, who I always thought was kinda cute. 


Episode 3 was perfect. 

spoiler (click to show/hide)

The Striga was creepy. Yennifier's beatification as a body horror was perfect and I liked the parallels between the two stories. 

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[Momo]

On EP 5 now, enjoying the tiddies

[Cerveza mas fina]

Witcher good

[Potato]

Just finished episode 2. So glad this is not just Game of Thrones lite. Definitely has its own identity and feel. Although, I think I'm missing out on a lot of things not having played the games.

The stories in the books flesh out the stories more but I won't say you should be missing stuff.  Each of the stories is taking place in different times though, i'm pretty sure which makes things confusing. 

Yeah, I got that impression too.


Battle scenes 
One on one fight scenes 

[Momo]

It's only like 3 timelines so far I think, on EP 6

[EightBitNate]

Had to turn captions on immediately. Wtf are they saying

[thisismyusername]

Just finished episode 3 and I still haven’t seen a single hog yet

Sadly, the Witcher is Polish: So not very Queer friendly. No hogs unless you mod naked Geralt. :'( We'll get Unicorn sex in this I guess?

Just finished episode 2. So glad this is not just Game of Thrones lite. Definitely has its own identity and feel. Although, I think I'm missing out on a lot of things not having played the games.

The stories in the books flesh out the stories more but I won't say you should be missing stuff.  Each of the stories is taking place in different times though, i'm pretty sure which makes things confusing.

IMO the Ciri Arc books are must-reads for the series: Especially since Ciri is a central plot point in the Wither 3. This means the non-Season of Storm and Last Wish books are the ones  you want to read.

[Mr Gilhaney]

Watched first ep. Thought it was a bit shit

[Madrun Badrun]

Episodes 3,4, and 5 are really good compared to episode 1 and 2 which are a bit wonky. 

[Madrun Badrun]

Also Dandelion is really good. 

[Madrun Badrun]

Watching episode 6 made me realize that I haven't seen a show this good since Xena: Warrior Princess.

[Dickie Dee]

The fight at the end of episode 1 

I'd read Cavill was really pushing to play Geralt and seems pretty clear he put in some work

[Dickie Dee]

Only finished Ep1 but the Ciri actress seems great so far

[Madrun Badrun]

Finished it.  Really liked that they covered the first 2.25 books in one season, though I wish there were two more episodes so they could have done the Beauty and the Beast and the Little Mermaid short stories.  Besides the first two episodes being wonky, they did a really good job.  I think they did more things right than wrong with adapting the books.  They did great by Yennifier.  I also like that they aged up Ciri and so didn't have a child actor.  I'm looking forward for season 2.  It's definitely going to appeal more to people who like Xena and Sparticus than GOT, but that's to be expected.

[BIONIC]

I also loved the show.

Great mix of serious and grimdark, with levity, humor, and good old fashioned adventure. Amazing cinematography and score throughout.

Cavill was amazing as Geralt. Jaskier/Dandelion was a real highlight as well. Legitimately steals every scene he’s in. Hopefully he’s back next season.

Issues I have with it are Geralt not using signs nearly enough, and only ever really using Aard except for like one or two exceptions. Also, Triss is super fucking dull here. In the game she’s powerful, cunning, and assertive. Here she’s just a meek bitch. Not sure if it’s more accurate to the books, but I don’t like it either way. Maybe they just didn't want to make a love triangle, and focus on Yennefer instead?

Anyways, awesome fucking show. Hopefully it’s a success.

[thisismyusername]

Triss is sort-of meek in the books, yeah. But she also

spoiler (click to show/hide)

betrays Geralt, and Ciri by scheming with the Sisterhood of Witches [or whatever it was called]

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Meanwhile, Yennifer:

spoiler (click to show/hide)

Gets her FUCKING NAILS PULLED OUT in torture and doesn't give up Geralt and Ciri's locations to the folks that wanted Ciri

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So #TeamYennifer stays winning and CD Project fucked up having Yen be out of the games until the third one (which focused on Ciri a lot, ironically) while trying to push Triss to where #TeamTriss are delusional.

[Great Rumbler]

Episodes 3,4, and 5 are really good compared to episode 1 and 2 which are a bit wonky. 

Agreed about the first three episodes. 1 and 2 were kind of a mess and all over the place, felt like they're were trying to do too much with the time they had. Episode 3 breathes more and has better focus, it was great.

[chronovore]

https://twitter.com/Polygon/status/1208175484586078208

[D3RANG3D]

Superman really nailed video game Geralt.

spoiler (click to show/hide)

Binged the whole thing, liked it as dumb fantasy crap. 

[close]

[nudemacusers]

Struggling to square the praise heaped on game of thrones and the critical panning this is getting... not that this is grade a material, but both shows are kinda up their own pulpy fantasy ass. Will say game of thrones had better acting, so it edges there. Sword fighting here is another tier entirely though.

I dunno give it a low B after a few eps 🤷‍♂️

[Momo]

The three main players in GoT had some of the most awful 90s Herculesesq acting I've ever seen

[Coax]

I'd read Cavill was really pushing to play Geralt and seems pretty clear he put in some work

From an interview I saw he mentioned he played The Witcher 3 'to death' on release then met the producer of the series and was turned onto the books.

[CatsCatsCats]

Show is rad. Cavill really has dialog tree face down

[nudemacusers]

Um Hmm

Hmm

Fill me up zaddy 

[CatsCatsCats]

male gaze

Honestly thought yen was hotter as a hunchback with perfect tits

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[thisismyusername]

Critics are panning it because it’s 2019 and the show had tons of gratuitous nudity in episode one.

I mean the books have a ton of sex (ok, not a ton but there's at least one sex scene in every fucking story, if not more). One of the short stories even puts Yen into a near-rape situation. Sapkowski is a fucking dirty Polish.

[Don Rumata]

Critics are panning it because it’s 2019 and the show had tons of gratuitous nudity in episode one.  I mean I read a critic claim the wizard who hires Geralt to kill that scrubby princess as an “Incel.”

What the fuck is the point of critics at this point if they are going to be so reactionary to some titillation?  Like fuck off.

I thought people* hated this because the "SJW were committing white genocide" with the casting.
I guess you can't win either way.

[Madrun Badrun]

Ya, honestly, given the source material, they did really good with diversity and treatment of women.  I kind of liked that there are a lot of black people in generic roles but then we also got stereotypical black tribal parts in episode 6.  Arguably maybe casting little people as dwarves all the time is a little iffy, but my stance is its better for them to have any kind of acting job no matter the part and get them out of the mines or off the dole or whatever they do. 

[Nintex]

https://twitter.com/EntNewsShowbiz/status/1206643377212678144

The critics seeing this
 

[Great Rumbler]

I think critics are down on Witcher because it leans heavily into its pulp-fantasy roots instead of trying to be a "medieval soap-opera."

[Van Cruncheon]

yeah, witcher is just a grimdark low fantasy mashup of european fairy tales. it's pulp af, but of the sort i'd flip my shit over if i was 13, and so binge ahoy

[Eel O'Brian]

On the Joe Bob scale how many titties are we talking here

[BIONIC]

On the Joe Bob scale how many titties are we talking here

spoiler (click to show/hide)

There’s an Eyes Wide Shut orgy scene in one of the episodes

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[Van Cruncheon]

quality tiddies, no less

[BIONIC]

quality tiddies, no less

Yennefer’s tiddies

[Eel O'Brian]

Okay, don't have a Netflix subscription right now, but some 1980s hack and slash combined with cinemax late nite style gritty titty action does sound appealing

[Lonewulfeus]

male gaze

Honestly thought yen was hotter as a hunchback with perfect tits

[close]

HBILFs

[Dickie Dee]

Thing about it is it's all impeccably done to the highest quality , there's just no way to put some of this shit on screen without it being at least a bit corny AF.

I'm loving it tho 

[Potato]

Yeah, your ability to lean into the cheese is what will decide your ability to like this show. If you're expecting Game of Thrones v2.0, then you're going to have a bad time. If you're expecting some Conan the Barbarian-type sword and sorcery shit, you'll love it.