Author Topic: The Official CRANK Discussion Thread (Read 4488 times)

The Miles Trahan Burger Experiment · « **on:** August 31, 2006, 08:54:59 PM »

Yuo know how we do this. Tell us how much you're pissing your pants waiting for the film to be released, yadda yadda yadda and then post impressions/reviews once you see it. It's out TOMORROW, so be on the lookout...

http://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/crank/

HATERS BE DAMNED!!!

CajoleJuice · « **Reply #1 on:** August 31, 2006, 08:58:51 PM »

This movie will rock.

That is all.

The Miles Trahan Burger Experiment · « **Reply #2 on:** August 31, 2006, 09:00:13 PM »

I really hope it does, because other than Clerks II, LMS and Pirates this summer was full of dissapointments.

:'(

CajoleJuice · « **Reply #3 on:** August 31, 2006, 09:02:54 PM »

Quote from: FilmFocus

Ridiculously, incomprehensibly, undeniably cool, brilliantly, passionately and hysterically original, Crank is pure cinema heaven - nearly ninety minutes of action and comedy for its own sake with none of the silly little plot or conceivability niggles inevitably dolled out in your average Michael Bay film. If Jason Statham earned a penny for every time he was The Man in Crank, he'd have riches enough to buy the world. An insane suggestion befitting this year's most insane and criminally fun movie.

Sounds fucking awesome.

The Miles Trahan Burger Experiment · « **Reply #4 on:** August 31, 2006, 09:05:44 PM »

"If Jason Statham earned a penny for every time he was The Man in Crank, he'd have riches enough to buy the world."

The best tagline EVER. This movie better be the shit.

Vizzys · « **Reply #5 on:** August 31, 2006, 09:15:09 PM »

You bastard.

The Miles Trahan Burger Experiment · « **Reply #6 on:** August 31, 2006, 09:16:16 PM »

The Miles Trahan Burger Experiment · « **Reply #7 on:** September 01, 2006, 03:05:40 PM »

HOLT WTF CRANK ISN'T PLAYING ANYWHERE CLOSE TO ME!!!!

CajoleJuice · « **Reply #8 on:** September 01, 2006, 08:05:32 PM »

Quote from: The Dark Shake on September 01, 2006, 03:05:40 PM

HOLT WTF CRANK ISN'T PLAYING ANYWHERE CLOSE TO ME!!!!

OWNED BITCH! NASSAU COUNTY SUCKS

The Miles Trahan Burger Experiment · « **Reply #9 on:** September 01, 2006, 08:06:10 PM »

It does. :'(

EDIT: Ah well, at least I have Adult Swim Fix to get me through tonight...

CajoleJuice · « **Reply #10 on:** September 01, 2006, 08:11:30 PM »

The joke will be on me if it sucks. It better not.

The Miles Trahan Burger Experiment · « **Reply #11 on:** September 01, 2006, 08:15:42 PM »

Quote from: CajoleJuice on September 01, 2006, 08:11:30 PM

The joke will be on me if it sucks. It better not.

Wait, its playing in Suffolk?

Time to hitch a ride...

CajoleJuice · « **Reply #12 on:** September 01, 2006, 08:24:46 PM »

Come to Island 16 Theater in Holbrook, I'm going to a 10:20 showing. It's right down the road on the L.I.E.

The Miles Trahan Burger Experiment · « **Reply #13 on:** September 01, 2006, 08:28:25 PM »

A quick search on MoviePhone reveals that the closest theaters playing CRANK are:

AMC Loews Bay Terrace (6 mi)
211-01 26th Avenue
Bayside, NY 11360 Map

* 11:00am |
* 1:45pm |
* 4:45pm |
* 7:45pm |
* 10:25pm

Movieworld Douglaston (6 mi)
242-02 61st Avenue, Douglaston Mall
Douglaston, NY 11363 Map

* 12:00pm |
* 2:00pm |
* 4:00pm |
* 6:00pm |
* 8:00pm |
* 10:00pm

Regal Cinemas New Roc City 18 And Imax (7 mi)
33 LeCount Place
New Rochelle, NY 10801 Map

* 12:30pm |
* 2:55pm |
* 5:20pm |
* 7:45pm |
* 10:10pm |
* 12:35am

:'( :'( :'(

CajoleJuice · « **Reply #14 on:** September 01, 2006, 08:32:08 PM »

Wait, you don't have a car do you?

The Miles Trahan Burger Experiment · « **Reply #15 on:** September 01, 2006, 08:34:31 PM »

Quote from: CajoleJuice on September 01, 2006, 08:32:08 PM

Wait, you don't have a car do you?

Nope, nor a driver's license. This night is full of: :'( :'( :'(

Vizzys · « **Reply #16 on:** September 01, 2006, 08:45:08 PM »

Quote from: The Dark Shake on September 01, 2006, 08:34:31 PM

Quote from: CajoleJuice on September 01, 2006, 08:32:08 PM
Wait, you don't have a car do you?
Nope, nor a driver's license. This night is full of: :'( :'( :'(

The Miles Trahan Burger Experiment · « **Reply #17 on:** September 01, 2006, 08:47:26 PM »

AT LEAST I CAN MASTURBATE WITH MY TEARS!

:'(

CajoleJuice · « **Reply #18 on:** September 01, 2006, 09:11:53 PM »

At least you didn't fail your driving test three times already.

brawndolicious · « **Reply #19 on:** September 01, 2006, 09:16:31 PM »

this movie makes me hardly hard. please post impressions.

The Miles Trahan Burger Experiment · « **Reply #20 on:** September 01, 2006, 09:24:33 PM »

So does the idea of Amy Smart getting anal in front of a bus full of Asian schoolgirls

brawndolicious · « **Reply #21 on:** September 01, 2006, 09:27:24 PM »

Quote from: The Dark Shake on September 01, 2006, 09:24:33 PM

So does the idea of Amy Smart getting anal in front of a bus full of Asian schoolgirls

you haven't changed your underwear in a few weeks, have you?

Polari · « **Reply #22 on:** September 01, 2006, 09:35:16 PM »

Sounds like "D.O.A." made stupid.

The Miles Trahan Burger Experiment · « **Reply #23 on:** September 01, 2006, 09:52:06 PM »

I hear he gets a hard-on in a crowded street window shopping TVs. And he's only wearing a hospital gown...

I'm going to go cry myself to sleep now. :'(

CajoleJuice · « **Reply #24 on:** September 02, 2006, 01:08:51 AM »

Just got back. It was damn fun. More than a few times the entire theater was laughing. The action wasn't as awesomely great as The Transporter (I haven't seen the second), but the tension and humor made it a great popcorn movie. The special effects were pretty bad at times though. You'll see what I'm talking about. $:-\$

Nevertheless, I give it a solid 7/10 if you go in expecting just a damn enjoyable movie.

The Miles Trahan Burger Experiment · « **Reply #25 on:** September 02, 2006, 01:10:21 AM »

7/10?!

Pile on the :'( :'( :'( :'( 's

CajoleJuice · « **Reply #26 on:** September 02, 2006, 01:12:16 AM »

I was in between a 7 and an 8. I didn't want to pussy out and give a 7.5. Half points are cop-outs.

Plus, I like to underrate stuff for other people, so they can't come back and say OH YOU SAID IT WAS AWESOME YOU IDIOT

Ecrofirt · « **Reply #27 on:** September 02, 2006, 01:21:50 AM »

Fun action romp.

CajoleJuice · « **Reply #28 on:** September 02, 2006, 01:23:54 AM »

Quote from: Ecrofirt on September 02, 2006, 01:21:50 AM

Fun action romp.

Sums it up.

Really, just go see Shake. For what it tries to do, it just might be a 9/10. I don't know. It was definitely worth the money, that's all I know.

The Miles Trahan Burger Experiment · « **Reply #29 on:** September 02, 2006, 01:26:00 AM »

I WOULD SEE IT IF IT WERE PLAYING NEAR ME, YOU SUFFOLK FUCKER!!!!

CajoleJuice · « **Reply #30 on:** September 02, 2006, 01:27:05 AM »

Quote from: The Dark Shake on September 02, 2006, 01:26:00 AM

I WOULD SEE IT IF I HAD A DRIVER'S LICENSE AND A CAR!!

Fixed.

The Miles Trahan Burger Experiment · « **Reply #31 on:** September 02, 2006, 01:27:33 AM »

:'( :'( :'(

Vizzys · « **Reply #32 on:** September 02, 2006, 01:56:21 AM »

Loser

G The Resurrected · « **Reply #33 on:** September 03, 2006, 02:42:47 AM »

1000 times better than Snakes on a Plane, took my flask with 7oz of Gentlemen Jack bought the huge ass soda sat back relaxed and enjoyed the movie through and through. And i had a great audiance of people cracking up it was great.

CajoleJuice · « **Reply #34 on:** September 03, 2006, 02:44:07 AM »

Quote from: ZomBz on September 03, 2006, 02:42:47 AM

1000 times better than Snakes on a Plane, took my flask with 7oz of Gentlemen Jack bought the huge ass soda sat back relaxed and enjoyed the movie through and through. And i had a great audiance of people cracking up it was great.

I do agree it was better than Snakes on a Plane. I gotta up my rating. What was I thinking? 7/10. Pfftt.

G The Resurrected · « **Reply #35 on:** September 03, 2006, 02:48:15 AM »

Yeah it goes into the cult classic list of films like that cause its one of the best action popcorn flicks in years maybe even the past decade.

CajoleJuice · « **Reply #36 on:** September 03, 2006, 02:51:49 AM »

I think it was the ending that stuck in my mind and affected my rating too much. I won't go into detail, but yea, the effects were really bad in it. And yea... since I can't spoiler tag I won't say anything else. The rest of the movie rocked though. I felt like it could've had more pure ass-kicking though.

G The Resurrected · « **Reply #37 on:** September 03, 2006, 02:59:14 AM »

DO NOT READ SPOILERS

THE ENDING LEFT IT ALL OPEN IF YOU ASK ME. HE BLINKS BUT WE DONT KNOW IF HE"S DEAD NOW HE COULD HAVE SOMETHING EVEN MORE CRAZY IN HIM SINCE HE GOT A SECOND DOSE.

CajoleJuice · « **Reply #38 on:** September 03, 2006, 03:04:30 AM »

I don't know, I really didn't mean that per se...

DO NOT READ THIS EITHER

FUCK I CANT MAKE IT SMALL ENOUGH

G The Resurrected · « **Reply #39 on:** September 03, 2006, 03:07:13 AM »

Use 3 so i can see it =P

CajoleJuice · « **Reply #40 on:** September 03, 2006, 03:09:33 AM »

I was just really talking about the special effects for the fall and how long the fall actually took. That helicopter had to be like 35,000 feet in the air. It looked really fucking terrible when he landed too...usually I'm not that big of a stickler but christ, it looked horrendous. And that was the end of the film that stuck in my mind. $:-\$

I forgot to add "pt" after the number in the code. I'm distinguished mentally-challenged.

The Miles Trahan Burger Experiment · « **Reply #41 on:** September 03, 2006, 03:20:17 AM »

:'( :'( :'(

G The Resurrected · « **Reply #42 on:** September 03, 2006, 03:31:02 AM »

ending was good thats all i'm saying your just bummed cause of the ending.

BlueTsunami · « **Reply #43 on:** September 04, 2006, 05:20:04 PM »

This movie was SO awesome. It was action packed from start to finish with some breaks in between but then back to action. Jason Statham was awesome, Amy Smart (his girlfriend) was freakin hot and the whole supporting cast ruled.

This movie is essentially GTA in movie form. Drugs, Car Jacking, Gun Fights, Gangs, Hilarious dialog and funny/memorable characters. I wasn't really expecting to much of this movie and came out surprised. I give it 9/10.

G The Resurrected · « **Reply #44 on:** September 04, 2006, 05:47:59 PM »

how did it do for the weekend?

Error Macro · « **Reply #45 on:** September 04, 2006, 05:57:54 PM »

Freaking hell... Dwight Yoakam is in this movie. I have to see it.

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Author Topic: The Official CRANK Discussion Thread (Read 4488 times)