Yup, if I think a movie is bad i must not understand it. 
What about Spider man 3. Did all you fegs just not understand it?
What are you talking about?
Spider Man is an example of an overly convoluated plot that does not know what it wants to be. Mulholland Drive is a movie for those who enjoy having to figure out the plot as they watch it. It's not that hard to understand at all, and it's a pretty beautiful film.
Mulholland Drive uses the most subtle objects and dialogue to tell the story, in a very 2001: A Space Odyssey presentation. I remember you hating 2001 as well, so it's not really surprising.