Author Topic: Dranking with Saint Cornelius  (Read 3683 times)

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Saint Cornelius

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Dranking with Saint Cornelius
« on: July 02, 2007, 01:03:10 PM »
This is a new feature I'm working on for SOON COME STUFF

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My ex's dad was a real salt-of-the-earth mofo, through-and-through. Some might have called him white trash but I saw him as a man of leisure with Sammy Hagar locks. Anyways - he turned me onto the concept of a "bloody beer" and I've yet to repay him in kind. A Bloody Beer for those of you wondering - and for those of you with a delicate constitution, I suggest you read something else and just forget this post altogether - is shitty beer (he made his with Coors) + Clamato juice. Dear god, that sounds hideous. I didn't want to drink that shit but when he mixed me one with his last Coors tallboy, who was I to refuse?

It actually ended up being pretty a'ight - nothing I'd drink with any regularity but it didn't KILL me, which is what I thought was going to be the case.

Last weekend I'd been packing and moving and cleaning and I really needed a break, so I walked across the street to the liquor store for something to quench my thirst. Lo and behold, I came across a can of Budwiser and Clamato "Chelada" in a can. This is what Chelada is, according to Wikipedia:

Quote from: Wikipedia
The Chelada is a beverage that is created by adding the juice of one or two limes to a full glass of ice cubes and then pouring twelve ounces of a Mexican beer into the glass. The rim of the glass is typically salted. One variation of this drink is the Michelada, which is created by adding a couple of dashes of both Tabasco and Worcestershire sauces to the chelada. This fashion of drinking beer seems to have originated in Mexico, although the actual history of its origin is unknown.

Ahhhh, so THAT'S what a Bloody Beer is REALLY called. But since when is Budwiser fucking MEXICAN? Regardless, I had to check it out.



The can. It's totally bilingual and it's totally scolding your gringo ass for even THINKING about shaking it.



The drink. What the fuck, I don't remember these things being PINK! The Rainforest Cafe glass makes everything better and I hope it works well with this shit.



Fuck it, let me just drink a bit of this out of the can and see what it's like.



DO NOT WANT. DEAR GOD THIS SHIT IS FUCKING AWFUL. I've drank a sixer of Hefeweizen that tasted like it was brewed in someones' asshole on principle ALONE, but this shit was going to waste. I poured the glass out, brushed my teeth for like a hour (by the way, toothpaste + tomato-esque shit drink = might as well barf it all up now) and prayed I wouldn't be making a sacrifice to the porcelain god later that evening. All was well, thankfully.

dap

Van Cruncheon

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Re: Dranking with Saint Cornelius
« Reply #1 on: July 02, 2007, 01:55:02 PM »
:lol

did yer rainforest cafe glass have the sparkly neon lights in it?

this is an awesome feature. please continue!
duc

Cyanista

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Re: Dranking with Saint Cornelius
« Reply #2 on: July 02, 2007, 01:58:49 PM »
This is like buying vanilla coke in a can.  BAD IDEA.  Get yourself some tecate and some V8/tobasco and have a ball.
omg

Saint Cornelius

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Re: Dranking with Saint Cornelius
« Reply #3 on: July 02, 2007, 02:03:03 PM »
I didn't know that "bloody beer" =/= "chelada"

All I know is, the one my ex's dad made for me wasn't bad... but this bullshit here was like drinking tomato-flavored bile. Horrifying. The one-two punch of Smokin' Aces + that bullshit nearly took me out.

This is like buying vanilla coke in a can.  BAD IDEA. 

??? How else am I supposed to get the great flavor of vanilla into my coke?
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Yeti

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Re: Dranking with Saint Cornelius
« Reply #4 on: July 02, 2007, 02:03:39 PM »
 :lol the pictures are what makes this thread
WDW

Cyanista

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Re: Dranking with Saint Cornelius
« Reply #5 on: July 02, 2007, 02:04:58 PM »
Vanilla syrup, you heathen.  I have no idea what they flavor vanilla coke with, but I'd be willing to bet it isn't real vanilla.  That stuff in the can is so sweet it sets my jaw and makes me want to puke.  A nice fountain coke with a squirt of vanilla syrup?  Heavenly.

My point is this:  never buy the pre-packaged version of a great flavor combination, unless we're talking chocolate and PB in reese's cup form.
omg

BlueTsunami

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Re: Dranking with Saint Cornelius
« Reply #6 on: July 02, 2007, 02:06:52 PM »
Can Vanilla Coke is good. I'm sure the fountain coke tastes heavenly but sometimes your on the go and you want that vanilla blast in yo mouth.
:9

Saint Cornelius

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Re: Dranking with Saint Cornelius
« Reply #7 on: July 02, 2007, 02:08:00 PM »
I'm sure the fountain coke tastes heavenly but sometimes your on the go and you want that vanilla blast in yo mouth.


Tee hee hee, oh the comments I would like to make
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Himu

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Re: Dranking with Saint Cornelius
« Reply #8 on: July 02, 2007, 02:10:55 PM »
Holy shit Corny. Send me some of this shit.
IYKYK

TVC15

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Re: Dranking with Saint Cornelius
« Reply #9 on: July 02, 2007, 02:11:08 PM »
Jesus Christ, Clamato alone is disgusting.  I can't believe you did this, Corny, but uh, thanks for taking the bullet?
serge

Himu

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Re: Dranking with Saint Cornelius
« Reply #10 on: July 02, 2007, 02:12:11 PM »
Jesus Christ, Clamato alone is disgusting.  I can't believe you did this, Corny, but uh, thanks for taking the bullet?

EAT TUNA FISH FOR A MONTH BABY
IYKYK

TVC15

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Re: Dranking with Saint Cornelius
« Reply #11 on: July 02, 2007, 02:16:58 PM »
Corny, would you describe your Chelada experience as being like this:

serge

Saint Cornelius

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Re: Dranking with Saint Cornelius
« Reply #12 on: July 02, 2007, 02:17:36 PM »
Jesus Christ, Clamato alone is disgusting.  I can't believe you did this, Corny, but uh, thanks for taking the bullet?


I actually really like Clamato juice! Half a can of that + half a can of spicy V8 + vodka = a damn fine bloody mary.

Holy shit Corny. Send me some of this shit.

This shit sounds GOOD to you? Like Cyanista said, I'd recommend just making your own. I have a feeling this wasn't regular ol' Bud but more like a fucking MALT LIQUOR and that is fucking HORRIBLE. If I would've drank the whole thing, my mind would be on fire this morning.

TVC15: hahahahaha that's funny for so, SO many reasons.
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Himu

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Re: Dranking with Saint Cornelius
« Reply #13 on: July 02, 2007, 02:18:46 PM »
It doesn't sound GOOD but I want to try it anyways!  BRING ON THE PAIN.

Corny, would you describe your Chelada experience as being like this:

(Image removed from quote.)
what the hell is that from?
IYKYK

Saint Cornelius

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Re: Dranking with Saint Cornelius
« Reply #14 on: July 02, 2007, 02:23:10 PM »
last night's Entourage.
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The Fake Shemp

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Re: Dranking with Saint Cornelius
« Reply #15 on: July 02, 2007, 02:36:43 PM »
What is going on in that picture?
PSP

Saint Cornelius

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Re: Dranking with Saint Cornelius
« Reply #16 on: July 02, 2007, 02:37:46 PM »
Some serious salad tossing.
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Tauntaun

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Re: Dranking with Saint Cornelius
« Reply #17 on: July 02, 2007, 02:39:19 PM »
you spelled drinking wrong, have you been drinking?  :maf
:)

Saint Cornelius

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Re: Dranking with Saint Cornelius
« Reply #18 on: July 02, 2007, 02:51:02 PM »
Drink / drank / drunk, dummy
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Tauntaun

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Re: Dranking with Saint Cornelius
« Reply #19 on: July 02, 2007, 02:55:17 PM »
Drink / drank / drunk, dummy

hi friend, let's be friends, are we friends yet? can I have $20?  :-*
:)

Saint Cornelius

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Re: Dranking with Saint Cornelius
« Reply #20 on: July 02, 2007, 02:58:44 PM »
I get stabby when I'm drunk.
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Lonestar

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Re: Dranking with Saint Cornelius
« Reply #21 on: July 02, 2007, 03:19:51 PM »


(Image removed from quote.)

Awesome.  :lol :lol :lol  Last night's episodes of Entourage and Flight of the Conchords were really damn hilarious. 

Saint Cornelius

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Cyanista

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Re: Dranking with Saint Cornelius
« Reply #23 on: May 20, 2009, 02:15:45 PM »
And dragging a gaggle of clit-hangers in his wake.
omg

Saint Cornelius

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Re: Dranking with Saint Cornelius
« Reply #24 on: May 20, 2009, 02:19:08 PM »
Word is bond, Cyanista.
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Human Snorenado

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Re: Dranking with Saint Cornelius
« Reply #25 on: May 20, 2009, 03:01:18 PM »
yar

Powerslave

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Re: Dranking with Saint Cornelius
« Reply #26 on: May 21, 2009, 09:45:50 AM »
dranking drunking dronking

Tauntaun

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Re: Dranking with Saint Cornelius
« Reply #27 on: May 21, 2009, 10:12:13 AM »
Can Vanilla Coke is good. I'm sure the fountain coke tastes heavenly but sometimes your on the go and you want that vanilla blast in yo mouth.

:lol 

This is a gem of a post.

Edit:  Now I want a vanilla soda, I have some Vanilla Pepsi cans at home.   :'(
:)

Saint Cornelius

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Re: Dranking with Saint Cornelius
« Reply #28 on: August 21, 2010, 11:15:15 PM »
The adventure continues!!



(I like how the screen grab makes it look like I'm air-deepthroating)
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Saint Cornelius

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Re: Dranking with Saint Cornelius
« Reply #29 on: August 21, 2010, 11:47:29 PM »
It also seems like you're carrying a conversation with your penis.

Well me and my penis are BFFs, so...
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Barry Egan

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Re: Dranking with Saint Cornelius
« Reply #30 on: August 22, 2010, 12:26:25 AM »
omg

The Fake Shemp

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Re: Dranking with Saint Cornelius
« Reply #31 on: August 22, 2010, 12:44:01 AM »
 :lol
PSP

demi

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Re: Dranking with Saint Cornelius
« Reply #32 on: August 22, 2010, 11:16:46 AM »
The adventure continues!!



(I like how the screen grab makes it look like I'm air-deepthroating)


You got a lisp going on. Must be some California rubbing off to on you...
fat

Saint Cornelius

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Re: Dranking with Saint Cornelius
« Reply #33 on: August 22, 2010, 11:22:08 AM »
You got a lisp going on. Must be some California rubbing off to on you...

You can believe that California has rubbed off all over me.

...but I've had that lithp all my life. Part of my charm!  :-*
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Van Cruncheon

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Re: Dranking with Saint Cornelius
« Reply #34 on: August 22, 2010, 02:39:19 PM »
lisping podcast figgurts unite!
duc

Boogie

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Re: Dranking with Saint Cornelius
« Reply #35 on: August 22, 2010, 06:19:46 PM »
This is like buying vanilla coke in a can.  BAD IDEA. 

We don't have vanilla coke in Canada anymore.  So when I was in the States last weekend, I bought a shitload of the stuff and have been drinking it pretty much daily since.  :lol
MMA