So my mom just gave me the birds and bees talk...

[Phoenix Dark]

Earlier today my mom called and said she was coming over and bringing an educational video on driving. State Farm has a program for young drivers in which the insurance is lowered if you watch a video, don't get in any accidents, etc. Well when I opened the front door an hour ago I was surprised to see she brought all three of my brothers. Once she walked in I knew something bad was about to happen. I figured this would devolve into another argument over educational goals, but instead she said she wanted to discuss the birds and the bees. Huh?

I'm twenty years old, have a semi relationship, and watch enough porn to know exactly what to do when that time comes. But alas I was subjected to 10 minutes of talk about "dating". My mom prefaced her speech by talking about the "new" stats that show that 80% of all women who have AIDS are black/latina. She wasn't amused by my solution to this dilemma ("just date white women"), and went on to discuss the politics of AIDS in the black world. Not surprisingly, it started with the down low brotha.

"A large portion of black males are incarcerated, and when they come out of jail many have AIDS. This is caused by the down low behavior: men who have sex with women, but have sex with men too"

*my brothers looked shocked at this revelation, I merely grimaced*

What struck me most was her attempt to put all the blame on the man, IE the homosexual man; there was no talk about personal responsibility among women, women having multiple babies with sorry men, etc. I didn't complain though, at least not until she brought up abstinence. On one hand I understood that yeah, when talking to say my 12 year old brother that may be a good move for a parent, but I had to argue. She claimed abstinence was the best plan, which on paper is true...but in practice, not so much. When I brought up condoms I was surprised she agreed a bit, but she said that having the "right" mindset is safer - whatever that means. The "right" mindset can also mean using a condom everytime. -_-

At the end of the day I'm shocked and a bit annoyed over this. It seems to me that she could have talked to my youngest brothers about this alone. She's VERY annoyed that I won't bring vamp girl over for dinner, and often she'll call asking whether I'm "with" anyone. She wants me to bring her to my parent's big Obama fundraiser/rally next week lol, and I've rejected the offer. I'll introduce them when I feel comfortable. Right now I don't want to give off false hints anyway

[Madrun Badrun]

have you ever thought about trying to tell her that she is wrong about gay guys? 

[Shuri]

I know It's probably yet another one of your fake-ass stories, but your mom tried to handle that conversation the best way she could within the limits of her knowledge and belief systems. Respect your mom, giving you 3 tards the talk must had been really awkward for her and it's tough for parents.

[brawndolicious]

why didn't your dad do it?

also why did your mother talkd about homosexuality as being down-low as if it's some sort of shameful thing.  If I had that fucked up of a mother I would have said a lot of guys get raped in prison and that's how they get AIDS so if I dated a guy who was in prison that she shouldn't jump to conclusions.

of course this story is fake though.

[Ichirou]

wtf at this thread.

[Van Cruncheon]

did she tell you about the WHITE PEE and how girls have a little FRONT BOTTOM you put the WHITE PEE IN

[Junpei the Tracer!]

Can't get AIDS with this:

[Ichirou]

I can't believe PD has two younger brothers. Two other PDs-in-training. Goddamn.

[Phoenix Dark]

I can't believe PD has two younger brothers. Two other PDs-in-training. Goddamn.

3 younger brothes

But yeah I'm all wtf now. At least she brought me some food

[Ichirou]

Jesus Christ.

[TVC15]

Did she really say "down low?"  Like is that accepted black people terminology?

[Ichirou]

PD's mom sounds really ignorant/prejudiced. 

[Candyflip]

Can't get AIDS with this:

(Image removed from quote.)

What is this thing?

[Ichirou]

That's a picture of PD he posted in the picture thread a while back.

[ToxicAdam]

You should have asked your mom to demonstrate where the G spot is. It's her job as an educator to answer all your questions.

[Ichirou]

You should asked her how to make women orgasm.  I bet she would have answered that women can't orgasm, that's a SIN.

[TVC15]

I don't think I ever got a birds and bees talk.  I think my parents just assumed that my older brothers had already warped me.

[BlackMage]

is your mom hot, pd? did she give you a tour of the female bodice? I'm all hot and bothered now.

[Phoenix Dark]

Did she really say "down low?"  Like is that accepted black people terminology?

Yup it's a huge issue in the black community. Have you heard of Kevin Boykin? To me it just gives an excuse to blame the issue on a scapgoat, in this case homosexual black men. Having lived around black people all my life, I'm not blind to the high level of promiscuity in the community which is documented. It's not just "down low" brothas.

[Ichirou]

Wonder how your mom will react when she finds out about your big black cock porn fetish.

[Beezy]

I walked out of my room while saying "NO" when my mother tried to give me the talk a few years ago. The only reason she tried to was because of some shit that she saw on Oprah.

[TVC15]

What's a Kevin Boykin?

[demi]

OMG at PD's pic WTF you're so UGLY

[Phoenix Dark]

What's a Kevin Boykin?

Eh I mean Keith Boykin
http://www.amazon.com/Beyond-Down-Low-Denial-America/dp/0786714344/ref=pd_sim_b_3_img/104-7925291-9047163

[Junpei the Tracer!]

What's a Kevin Boykin?

Eh I mean Keith Boykin
http://www.amazon.com/Beyond-Down-Low-Denial-America/dp/0786714344/ref=pd_sim_b_3_img/104-7925291-9047163

Looks pretty gay to me.

[Oblivion]

In my family's culture, guys and girls ain't supposed to know how to do it until a few months before they're married.

[Robo]

I never got the birds and the bees talk from my parents either.  I think they're lucky I won't turn into a ForzaItalia, 35 years old and still believing that pulling-out is an acceptable form of birth control.

[Phoenix Dark]

He doesn't believe it's an acceptable form of birth control - he simply doesn't care. God I hope that kid is his, and I hope the mother doesn't have an abortion. That bastard needs to grow up

[TVC15]

Haha, I just started writing this little thing about a PD-based character accepting a blowjob from Junpei "on the DL," but afterwards, PD has to saw in half and invert Junpei's penis to return the favor.  I am calling it Transdecent Proposal.

[Ichirou]

Post it when you're done!!!! 

Also, PD, you do realize that ForzaItalia is a joke character and that thread is utterly fake, right?

[TVC15]

The more I think about it, the more I think Junpei is black and on the down low.

The Logic:
1. Junpei is either gay or a possible transgender candidate (fact)
2. Black people on the DL would not admit to their acts. . .unless they could do it anonymously without visuals, via the internet (fact)
3. Junpei has never posted a picture (fact)
4. Junpei is black (it logically follows)

[Ichirou]

 

[Phoenix Dark]

No I perfer the company of women over men but the things I've done I have enjoyed so I wouldnt mind doing it agian but this time I'd be rather picky of who I chose.

...

giving a bj is kinda boring

 

[TVC15]

Does that sound on the DL to you, PD?  He's very careful to avoid calling himself gay, but when confronted he won't deny enjoying the acts he's done.

[Phoenix Dark]

Well he's underage so it's a touchy subject. BUT...

Junpei seems to be a closeted individual. He attempts to hide this by being extremely hyper sexual towards women, but it always comes off as forced (Verbotem) or superficial (avatars). I have tried to bring out his true sexuality by sending him cheeseburger porn but he ignores me. He's unwilling to admit that he's sexually attracted to males.

So yes, one could make the argument that Junpei is indeed a down low brotha lova.

[TVC15]

C'mon, Junpei, I'll make a lover out of you.  It's in my blood.  Right next to the AIDS.

[Smooth Groove]

It's not PC but the truth is that most moms still don't want their kids to be gay.  It's not just a black thing. 

[Phoenix Dark]

It's not PC but the truth is that most moms still don't want their kids to be gay.  It's not just a black thing. 

Of course they don't. Telling them they won't have grand kids (and the family line won't be carried on...from an evolutionary aspect *warning* possibly talking out my ass *warning*) is not going to be pretty.

[Smooth Groove]

It's not PC but the truth is that most moms still don't want their kids to be gay.  It's not just a black thing. 

Of course they don't. Telling them they won't have grand kids (and the family line won't be carried on...from an evolutionary aspect *warning* possibly talking out my ass *warning*) is not going to be pretty.

It's assumed that lots of gay men did indeed have kids.  Otherwise there won't be so many people with gay genes.  Unless there's really no genetic disposition to be homosexual, then it's an entirely different matter.  Also, if homosexuality is affected by genes, then perhaps there might be some legitimate concerns about the survival of one's genes in today's world.  Since today's society is far more acceptable of same sex couples, there's a chance that many homosexual people will choose not to have kids and pretend to be heterosexual as their gay predecessors did (presumably).  I don't know if anyone really knows enough about homosexual people in the past to make such a study though. 

[Phoenix Dark]

Gay gene eh? I've always thought it was more of a mental predisposition. I don't want to use the word disorder for obvious reasons (it being offensive for one)

[Smooth Groove]

Gay gene eh? I've always thought it was more of a mental predisposition. I don't want to use the word disorder for obvious reasons (it being offensive for one)

It's still considered a disorder in China.  Communists don't give a shit about being politically correct.  Or scientifically correct. lol

[Ichirou]

Gay gene eh? I've always thought it was more of a mental predisposition. I don't want to use the word disorder for obvious reasons (it being offensive for one)

See, I would have said I don't want to use the word disorder because y'know, it isn't one.  But that's just me.

[Smooth Groove]

Gay gene eh? I've always thought it was more of a mental predisposition. I don't want to use the word disorder for obvious reasons (it being offensive for one)

See, I would have said I don't want to use the word disorder because y'know, it isn't one.  But that's just me.

How would you know? You teach English, not Biology. 

[Ichirou]

If it were a disorder, it would be medically classified as one.  It's not.

[Smooth Groove]

Doctors make all kind of stupid classifications in the field of psychiatry without little or no research.  Unlike other medical problems, doctors go by guidelines instead of protocols when they're treating psychiatric problems. 

[Ichirou]

DAMMIT SMOOTH GROOVE

IT'S OKAY TO BE GAY

BE PROUD, SWEETCHEEKS

[Phoenix Dark]

If it were a disorder, it would be medically classified as one.  It's not.

I hope you know that's a horrible answer, and I'm sure it was used many times 20 years ago for various mental disorders recognized today.

I don't know what homosexuality is. From what I've studied (and from my limited understanding of the subject), the brain seems like the central issue. But many say it's genetic, pointing to some of the physical traits such as homosexual men's finger prints resembling women's. Eh I don't know

[Smooth Groove]

DAMMIT SMOOTH GROOVE

IT'S OKAY TO BE GAY

BE PROUD, SWEETCHEEKS

Don't take me seriously.  I'm just being a dick today because of all the shit I had to do for school today.  The only thing that can make me feel better right now is a nice, authentic bowl of Hakata Ramen. 

[Ichirou]

If it were a disorder, it would be medically classified as one.  It's not.

I hope you know that's a horrible answer, and I'm sure it was used many times 20 years ago for various mental disorders recognized today.

Oh, PD, proving your ignorance once again.  The reason I gave that facetious answer is precisely because homosexuality used to be classified as a mental disorder, but was removed from the list in the 1970s.

Do you actually know any gay people offline? Like, really know them, not just some random classmates who you see walking down the college hallways.

[Phoenix Dark]

  Lame cop out, now lame excuse.

Anyway back on subject: Junpei where are you? I have more questions for you

[Ichirou]

Lame cop out, now lame excuse.

Damn, you're stupid.

Way to dodge the question, btw, dumbass.  Guess your mommy and daddy don't let you hang out with the gays, huh?  Maybe they're afraid it'll catch and you'll end up being on the "down low."

[Phoenix Dark]

I know many gay people irl and online. I've said it before, but one of the best things about leaving homeschooling was being able to meet such a vast group of different people. Whether they were muslim, gay, or Jehovah Witness ( ) I was able to get a better understanding of their beliefs/lifestyles. It was a great time for me.

[Ichirou]

I know many gay people irl and online. I've said it before, but one of the best things about leaving homeschooling was being able to meet such a vast group of different people. Whether they were muslim, gay, or Jehovah Witness ( ) I was able to get a better understanding of their beliefs/lifestyles. It was a great time for me.

Again, do you actually know gay people, or are they just folks you see on campus?  I don't believe for a second you're friends or even acquaintances with someone gay, or you'd see just how offensive it is to even imply homosexuality could be a disorder to them (as you have done in this thread, with all your talk about how it could be classified as a disorder in the future).  Jesus Christ, you are stupid.  Go kill yourself.  Please.

[Smooth Groove]

Why would you want to be friends with gay people if you're not comfortable with homosexuality?  I've seen lots of gays fuck around with people who were obviously uncomfortable with public display of gayness. 

[Ichirou]

That idiot PD hasn't even been out of Michigan, so who knows how he'd react to being in a place where PDAs among gay people are more common. He'd probably pee himself and go hide in a Church, only to freak out when he realized he was in a Catholic Church (which, as all good religious nutjobs know, is run by the Antichrist). 

[Smooth Groove]

Don't you dare insult the Catholic Church!     Besides, it's well known that Catholics in the US are far more liberal than Protestants in the US and also Catholics in the rest of the world. 

[Ichirou]

Dude, I'm Catholic.  I'm just talking how fundie creationist idiot PD would react.

[Phoenix Dark]

I know many gay people irl and online. I've said it before, but one of the best things about leaving homeschooling was being able to meet such a vast group of different people. Whether they were muslim, gay, or Jehovah Witness ( ) I was able to get a better understanding of their beliefs/lifestyles. It was a great time for me.

Again, do you actually know gay people, or are they just folks you see on campus?  I don't believe for a second you're friends or even acquaintances with someone gay, or you'd see just how offensive it is to even imply homosexuality could be a disorder to them (as you have done in this thread, with all your talk about how it could be classified as a disorder in the future).  Jesus Christ, you are stupid.  Go kill yourself.  Please.

I have 4 gay friends, 3 of which are men if you must know; I'm also still in contact with a former teacher of mine who is gay. One of them essentially helped me understand the issue, while I didn't even know the other 2 guys were gay for some time lol. It was pretty weird because looking back the tell tell signs were there. 

The reason I didn't want to use the word "disorder" is because it has such a negative connotation. When I look at it from the mental aspect, I wonder whether we're all naturally heterosexual, but through some slight alterations in the brain one's sexuality can be changed before birth. The brain and its development are fascinating subjects, ones which I'll never fully understand but can't help but look into. We know that even the slightest changes in the brain can severely alter behavior. Perhaps homosexuality is a product of this.

It seems like a logical possibility, and it's not "my" theory; I've discussed it with biology professors who introduced me to the theory in the first place. I'd love to get Smooth Groove's take on it.

[Smooth Groove]

  Catholics

[Ichirou]

I have 4 gay friends, 3 of which are men if you must know; I'm also still in contact with a former teacher of mine who is gay. One of them essentially helped me understand the issue, while I didn't even know the other 2 guys were gay for some time lol. It was pretty weird because looking back the tell tell signs were there. 

TVC 15, Nick, etc., don't count, dumbass.