Author Topic: Man, I keep on striking out when it comes to these girls... (Read 13467 times)

The Black Stallion · « **on:** August 01, 2006, 05:33:35 PM »

Okay, so I was talking to this other chick I want to get with I met on the Facebook. We were discussing romance and what not. Girl shit, I know...

...so then I make a simple little joke. I said

"Yeah, my last girlfriend didn't like romance at all. I remember her neighbor owned this dog that wouldn't keep barking and she hated it. She would always complain about the noise and how much it annoyed her. So one day I walked over there, and shot it right through the heart. I then decapitated it and gave it to her on a silver platter. She was revolted and ended up dumping me like an hour later... saying some bullshit about litigation"

She hasn't talked to me since. Seriously, what the fuck? Why do I keep striking out with these girls? It was obviously a joke. College starts in like 4 weeks. You think I still have a chance at digging it out?

MrAngryFace · « **Reply #1 on:** August 01, 2006, 05:36:12 PM »

digging what out? The dog? I'd think its rotted away by now.

BlueTsunami · « **Reply #2 on:** August 01, 2006, 05:44:02 PM »

The joke was a lil bit to long and elaborate. She probably thought it wasn't a joke. Either that, or shes creeped out at how cynical the joke was. Either way, don't joke about killing domestic animals! Unless you know the girl well and she has that type of humor.

brawndolicious · « **Reply #3 on:** August 01, 2006, 05:45:32 PM »

That was pretty immature. If she's smart, the trick is to keep being her bitch. You just don't come up with stories of how sad you were sitting there with a dog's head.

MrAngryFace · « **Reply #4 on:** August 01, 2006, 05:46:02 PM »

Are you sure you didnt accidently use youre 'test to see if a girl is a guy or an insane person' instead of your 'joke'

Cheebs · « **Reply #5 on:** August 01, 2006, 05:49:45 PM »

You met a girl on facebook? How would you go about doing that. It's more friendly-only thing to look at profiles and doesn't seem to be as open in picking up people as myspace and its ilk would be.

LunarAura · « **Reply #6 on:** August 01, 2006, 06:13:31 PM »

Ugh, that's why I hate talking to women. Even when you cover your ground enough, most of them take offense at the stupidest things. Women and their inferior mentality, ugh.

rocketman · « **Reply #7 on:** August 01, 2006, 06:18:50 PM »

Just show her that picture of the rose in your mouth, and I think you're as good as laid.

Vagabond · « **Reply #8 on:** August 01, 2006, 06:24:01 PM »

Don't worry Kenny. Instead, begin a collection of Anime Toys and create the ultimate Video Games-playingroom.

Then get a job at Best Buy.

The Black Stallion · « **Reply #9 on:** August 01, 2006, 06:54:40 PM »

Quote from: Vagabond on August 01, 2006, 06:24:01 PM

Don't worry Kenny. Instead, begin a collection of Anime Toys and create the ultimate Video Games-playingroom.

Then get a job at Best Buy.

Yeah, maybe I can start by buying those "Real Men's Manga" you were suggesting in that other thread, dork.

Quote from: rocketman on August 01, 2006, 06:18:50 PM

Just show her that picture of the rose in your mouth, and I think you're as good as laid.

Funny you mention that... she really likes my photoshop skills. She even joined my Fan Club ;D

Vagabond · « **Reply #10 on:** August 01, 2006, 07:03:55 PM »

Wait, I BUY them?

Who's the one scared of pussy here?

MrAngryFace · « **Reply #11 on:** August 01, 2006, 07:05:21 PM »

Oh the internet 'im manly' argument. Classic.

Vagabond · « **Reply #12 on:** August 01, 2006, 07:07:45 PM »

Kenny's made plenty enough of his life available on the internet to know that he'd lose that argument to a girl scout. This isn't an argument at all.

The Miles Trahan Burger Experiment · « **Reply #13 on:** August 01, 2006, 07:09:00 PM »

Quote from: Vagabond on August 01, 2006, 07:07:45 PM

Kenny's made plenty enough of his life available on the internet to know that he'd lose that argument to a girl scout. This isn't an argument at all.

The Fake Shemp · « **Reply #14 on:** August 01, 2006, 07:10:45 PM »

Are you implying that girl scouts have less than adequate debate skills? That's pretty sexist! Mmm, these cookies are delicious.

MrAngryFace · « **Reply #15 on:** August 01, 2006, 07:12:21 PM »

YOU R BAIS WILLCO

The Miles Trahan Burger Experiment · « **Reply #16 on:** August 01, 2006, 07:13:45 PM »

Hahahahahahahahaha

But no shit, I love the peanut butter/chocolate girl scout cookies. And of course, the girls in uniforms...

WAIT OH FUCK STRIKE THAT LAST COMMENT!!!11

The Black Stallion · « **Reply #17 on:** August 01, 2006, 07:14:33 PM »

Quote from: Master Shake on August 01, 2006, 07:09:00 PM

Quote from: Vagabond on August 01, 2006, 07:07:45 PM
Kenny's made plenty enough of his life available on the internet to know that he'd lose that argument to a girl scout. This isn't an argument at all.

I gingerly concour with this rolleyes.

Vagabond · « **Reply #18 on:** August 01, 2006, 07:15:23 PM »

Quote from: Willco on August 01, 2006, 07:10:45 PM

Are you implying that girl scouts have less than adequate debate skills? That's pretty sexist! Mmm, these cookies are delicious.

Well, let me put it this way: WNBA

The Miles Trahan Burger Experiment · « **Reply #19 on:** August 01, 2006, 07:17:25 PM »

Quote from: The Black Stallion on August 01, 2006, 07:14:33 PM

Quote from: Master Shake on August 01, 2006, 07:09:00 PM
Quote from: Vagabond on August 01, 2006, 07:07:45 PM
Kenny's made plenty enough of his life available on the internet to know that he'd lose that argument to a girl scout. This isn't an argument at all.

I gingerly concour with this rolleyes.

"Gingerly"? As in, you wear women's clothing?

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #20 on:** August 01, 2006, 08:11:13 PM »

Why would you say something like that to a chick? That's not smooth.

I strike out with chicks with what I don't say, which can be worse.

Fatghost28 · « **Reply #21 on:** August 01, 2006, 09:10:35 PM »

Clearly, she's a dog lover. You have to kill a kitten and mail it to her in order to prove to her that you deep down really do love dogs.

The Black Stallion · « **Reply #22 on:** August 02, 2006, 01:15:44 AM »

Quote from: Fatghost28 on August 01, 2006, 09:10:35 PM

Clearly, she's a dog lover. You have to kill a kitten and mail it to her in order to prove to her that you deep down really do love dogs.

I dunno. She sent me some message about taking me up on that tennis date we were discussing. So I think I've still got a chance. But she also discovered my website after she joined my fanclub and left a rather unsavory comment reguarding my Your Daughters Will Be Whores article.

Bloodwake · « **Reply #23 on:** August 02, 2006, 01:21:07 AM »

Tough luck, man.

Wish me luck with this girl I met on MySpace... .she seems pretty cool.

The Black Stallion · « **Reply #24 on:** August 02, 2006, 01:26:33 AM »

Quote from: Bloodwake on August 02, 2006, 01:21:07 AM

Tough luck, man.

Wish me luck with this girl I met on MySpace... .she seems pretty cool.

Good luck. Here's to hoping she doesn't turn out to be a fattie. MySpace girls have this tendancy to post pictures of themselves while they were in HS before they discovered cigs, booze and had a kid or some bullshit like that.

Fatghost28 · « **Reply #25 on:** August 02, 2006, 11:05:06 AM »

Quote from: The Black Stallion on August 02, 2006, 01:15:44 AM

Quote from: Fatghost28 on August 01, 2006, 09:10:35 PM
Clearly, she's a dog lover. You have to kill a kitten and mail it to her in order to prove to her that you deep down really do love dogs.

I dunno. She sent me some message about taking me up on that tennis date we were discussing. So I think I've still got a chance. But she also discovered my website after she joined my fanclub and left a rather unsavory comment reguarding my Your Daughters Will Be Whores article.

Who, this one?

megs said...
Im not a whore, so your theory is incorrect and a discusting definition of the females sex, I am disapointed

She sounds like a stupid bitch.

Edit:

I like your site.

Cheebs · « **Reply #26 on:** August 02, 2006, 12:56:15 PM »

Look PD! Someone meeting a girl on facebook and another on myspace. I am baffled why in your desperation you have yet to try using the internet to find girls.

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #27 on:** August 02, 2006, 01:00:05 PM »

Quote from: Cheebs on August 02, 2006, 12:56:15 PM

Look PD! Someone meeting a girl on facebook and another on myspace. I am baffled why in your desperation you have yet to try using the internet to find girls.

I won't sink that low. MySpace is the devil Cheebs; remember that.

On a serious note...I'm just turned off by the politics of the thing. Everyone I know is on there, and it pains me to see how stupid most people's profiles are. I know there are some hot babes on MySpace; I've seen some great things XD. But I won't make one anytime soon.

The Black Stallion · « **Reply #28 on:** August 02, 2006, 01:22:54 PM »

Quote from: Phoenix Dark on August 02, 2006, 01:00:05 PM

Quote from: Cheebs on August 02, 2006, 12:56:15 PM
Look PD! Someone meeting a girl on facebook and another on myspace. I am baffled why in your desperation you have yet to try using the internet to find girls.

I won't sink that low. MySpace is the devil Cheebs; remember that.

On a serious note...I'm just turned off by the politics of the thing. Everyone I know is on there, and it pains me to see how stupid most people's profiles are. I know there are some hot babes on MySpace; I've seen some great things XD. But I won't make one anytime soon.

Sink that low? What? Dude, it's 2006... there are many different avenues of meeting people. Online is great for people like you that lack the confidence to approach a good looking broad in real life.

I will agree... MySpace is pretty bad. Did I mention people using old HS glamour shots for their profile? But Facebook is way better. People usually have a multitude of candid photos on their Facebook so you can often see them at their worst. Also, you can see who their friends are and how they like to have fun. Don't knock the Internet. It's the future, bruh.

Cheebs · « **Reply #29 on:** August 02, 2006, 02:47:39 PM »

Dude you don't even have to use myspace. There is 5 trillion websites that are focused on dating. Like he just said it's 2006. Internet dating is no longer seen as "low". It's perfectly normal. Just as Willco.

The Fake Shemp · « **Reply #30 on:** August 02, 2006, 02:51:08 PM »

Haha, I still don't know what to say when people ask me how we met, though. When the two of us were in San Diego the other month, family relatives were like, "How did you meet?"

I'm like, "Uh, in a BOATING ACCIDENT. Her ex-fiance was killed by a shark and sank her boat, with a swarm of hungry great whites circling her. It was all but certain death and peril. That's when I conicidentally was doing my weekly performing arts parasailing routine and saw her. I swooped in, punched one of the sharks in the nose and saved her. I managed to swim both her and myself to shore with my own strength."

"... psyche it was gaf lol."

The Miles Trahan Burger Experiment · « **Reply #31 on:** August 02, 2006, 02:55:24 PM »

OMG WILLCO'S DATING SOMEONE FROM gaf?

? ARE YOU KIDDING?!

I'VE NEVER HEARD OF THIS BEFORE!

SPIN SPIN SPIN!!!!

The Fake Shemp · « **Reply #32 on:** August 02, 2006, 02:58:58 PM »

Where the fuck have you been, Shake?

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #33 on:** August 02, 2006, 02:59:43 PM »

Quote from: Willco on August 02, 2006, 02:51:08 PM

Haha, I still don't know what to say when people ask me how we met, though. When the two of us were in San Diego the other month, family relatives were like, "How did you meet?"

I'm like, "Uh, in a BOATING ACCIDENT. Her ex-fiance was killed by a shark and sank her boat, with a swarm of hungry great whites circling her. It was all but certain death and peril. That's when I conicidentally was doing my weekly performing arts parasailing routine and saw her. I swooped in, punched one of the sharks in the nose and saved her. I managed to swim both her and myself to shore with my own strength."

"... psyche it was gaf lol."

Yes, that would be strange. Especially if the person knew what GAF was.

"Um yeah we met on GAF..."
"You better not do FHUTA to my daughter bastard!"
"Yes...sir"

The Miles Trahan Burger Experiment · « **Reply #34 on:** August 02, 2006, 03:01:05 PM »

Quote from: Willco on August 02, 2006, 02:58:58 PM

Where the fuck have you been, Shake?

At my comics shop, because I'm a huge nerd

The Black Stallion · « **Reply #35 on:** August 02, 2006, 05:08:12 PM »

Update: She's still down with The Black Don Flamenco... it's all good.

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #36 on:** August 02, 2006, 05:11:29 PM »

Quote from: The Black Stallion on August 02, 2006, 05:08:12 PM

Update: She's still down with The Black Don Flamenco... it's all good.

PICS

The Black Stallion · « **Reply #37 on:** August 02, 2006, 05:14:58 PM »

I will if everything goes well. I don't want a face for you guys to associate with my failure.

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #38 on:** August 02, 2006, 05:17:08 PM »

Quote from: The Black Stallion on August 02, 2006, 05:14:58 PM

I will if everything goes well. I don't want a face for you guys to associate with my failure.

Hahaha, I feel you.

Well you can at least post pics of your previous accomplishments.

The Black Stallion · « **Reply #39 on:** August 02, 2006, 05:21:30 PM »

Quote from: Phoenix Dark on August 02, 2006, 05:17:08 PM

Quote from: The Black Stallion on August 02, 2006, 05:14:58 PM
I will if everything goes well. I don't want a face for you guys to associate with my failure.

Hahaha, I feel you.

Well you can at least post pics of your previous accomplishments.

Accomplishments? More like a series of very, VERY akward failures. $:-\$ I think the most success I had was when I made out with this stoner chick from Frankenmouth. We both just got done with our Forensics speaches. She had a really big nose. I dug that... a lot.

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #40 on:** August 02, 2006, 05:24:03 PM »

You showed me this white gilrl once who was pretty good looking. Not great. She had nice boobs

The Black Stallion · « **Reply #41 on:** August 02, 2006, 05:27:11 PM »

Quote from: Phoenix Dark on August 02, 2006, 05:24:03 PM

You showed me this white gilrl once who was pretty good looking. Not great. She had nice boobs

A series of unfortunate mishaps prevented that from going anywhere. Which is awful because she was great. The other MySpace chicks I went with this summer turned out to be fatties. They hid it so well in their profiles too

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #42 on:** August 02, 2006, 05:28:48 PM »

Quote from: The Black Stallion on August 02, 2006, 05:27:11 PM

Quote from: Phoenix Dark on August 02, 2006, 05:24:03 PM
You showed me this white gilrl once who was pretty good looking. Not great. She had nice boobs
A series of unfortunate mishaps prevented that from going anywhere. Which is awful because she was great. The other MySpace chicks I went with this summer turned out to be fatties. They hid it so well in their profiles too

God dammit

So they were fatasses and tricked you into thinking they looked like they did 5 years ago? Lol. What did you say when you saw them irl lol?

The Black Stallion · « **Reply #43 on:** August 02, 2006, 05:34:32 PM »

Quote from: Phoenix Dark on August 02, 2006, 05:28:48 PM

Quote from: The Black Stallion on August 02, 2006, 05:27:11 PM
Quote from: Phoenix Dark on August 02, 2006, 05:24:03 PM
You showed me this white gilrl once who was pretty good looking. Not great. She had nice boobs
A series of unfortunate mishaps prevented that from going anywhere. Which is awful because she was great. The other MySpace chicks I went with this summer turned out to be fatties. They hid it so well in their profiles too

God dammit

So they were fatasses and tricked you into thinking they looked like they did 5 years ago? Lol. What did you say when you saw them irl lol?

I was cordial. I still tried to fuck them both:

Except it didn't turn out nearly as awesome as it did in the show.

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #44 on:** August 02, 2006, 05:36:36 PM »

Well what about pics of them then?

Cheebs · « **Reply #45 on:** August 02, 2006, 06:31:33 PM »

PD you spooking me out with your constant begging of pictures of girls he has been with.

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #46 on:** August 02, 2006, 06:38:46 PM »

Do you have pics of your women too?

I just want to see what Stallion's bagging. It should give me a hint of what I'm capible of tapping.

Cheebs · « **Reply #47 on:** August 02, 2006, 06:44:45 PM »

Quote from: Phoenix Dark on August 02, 2006, 06:38:46 PM

Do you have pics of your women too?

I just want to see what Stallion's bagging. It should give me a hint of what I'm capible of tapping.

I would start with people "below" you PD to build confidence. At your level I wouldn't be trying to reach your potential in "tapping".

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #48 on:** August 02, 2006, 06:58:39 PM »

Quote from: Cheebs on August 02, 2006, 06:44:45 PM

Quote from: Phoenix Dark on August 02, 2006, 06:38:46 PM
Do you have pics of your women too?

I just want to see what Stallion's bagging. It should give me a hint of what I'm capible of tapping.
I would start with people "below" you PD to build confidence. At your level I wouldn't be trying to reach your potential in "tapping".

Good point.

As I've said before, you shouldn't shoot for the hot girl. You shoot for the hot girl's friend. She's usually somewhat thick, but not fat. Big tits. Nice nails. Hair did. And she takes it in the ass.

The Miles Trahan Burger Experiment · « **Reply #49 on:** August 02, 2006, 07:00:26 PM »

The Black Stallion · « **Reply #50 on:** August 02, 2006, 07:53:40 PM »

Quote from: Phoenix Dark on August 02, 2006, 06:58:39 PM

Quote from: Cheebs on August 02, 2006, 06:44:45 PM
Quote from: Phoenix Dark on August 02, 2006, 06:38:46 PM
Do you have pics of your women too?

I just want to see what Stallion's bagging. It should give me a hint of what I'm capible of tapping.
I would start with people "below" you PD to build confidence. At your level I wouldn't be trying to reach your potential in "tapping".

Good point.

As I've said before, you shouldn't shoot for the hot girl. You shoot for the hot girl's friend. She's usually somewhat thick, but not fat. Big tits. Nice nails. Hair did. And she takes it in the ass.

Or she's dog ugly but has a "great personality" fuck that noise. All the hot girl's friends here usually have really bad teeth and are dog ugly. I'm always sure to give them the stink-eye. Making sure that they know where they stand.

There's also a lot of fat white chicks out here thinking they're God's gift to a strong black man such as myself. Whenever they give me "the look" I make sure to shake my head. If they STILL don't get the picture, I spit in their direction. No joke dude, 100% serious. That shit enrages me.

Also, Phoenix, we're in two different environments totally. Truth be told I'd rather be where you're at now. The eastern part of the state has better looking girls per-capita. The girls out here are lame lame lame.

The Miles Trahan Burger Experiment · « **Reply #51 on:** August 02, 2006, 07:55:43 PM »

Quote from: The Black Stallion on August 02, 2006, 07:53:40 PM

Or she's dog ugly but has a "great personality" fuck that noise. All the hot girl's friends here usually have really bad teeth and are dog ugly. I'm always sure to give them the stink-eye. Making sure that they know where they stand.

There's also a lot of fat white chicks out here thinking they're God's gift to a strong black man such as myself. Whenever they give me "the look" I make sure to shake my head. If they STILL don't get the picture, I spit in their direction. No joke dude, 100% serious. That shit enrages me.

Quote

Man, I keep on striking out when it comes to these girls...

HMMMMM??[/size]

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #52 on:** August 02, 2006, 09:11:04 PM »

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Mr. Spinnington · « **Reply #53 on:** August 03, 2006, 12:00:21 AM »

Black Stallion, have you tried a bookstore?

The Miles Trahan Burger Experiment · « **Reply #54 on:** August 03, 2006, 12:00:47 AM »

Quote from: Mr. Spinnington on August 03, 2006, 12:00:21 AM

Black Stallion, have you tried a bookstore?

Real men don't read!

Mr. Spinnington · « **Reply #55 on:** August 03, 2006, 12:06:19 AM »

Quote from: Master Shake on August 03, 2006, 12:00:47 AM

Quote from: Mr. Spinnington on August 03, 2006, 12:00:21 AM
Black Stallion, have you tried a bookstore?
Real men don't read!

Then why are you on an internet forum?

JOKE CHARACTER REVEALED[/b]

The Miles Trahan Burger Experiment · « **Reply #56 on:** August 03, 2006, 12:07:03 AM »

Quote from: Mr. Spinnington on August 03, 2006, 12:06:19 AM

Quote from: Master Shake on August 03, 2006, 12:00:47 AM
Quote from: Mr. Spinnington on August 03, 2006, 12:00:21 AM
Black Stallion, have you tried a bookstore?
Real men don't read!
Then why are you on an internet forum?

JOKE CHARACTER REVEALED[/b]

I'm not a real man. I'm a fucking beverage :'(

Mr. Spinnington · « **Reply #57 on:** August 03, 2006, 12:09:51 AM »

Yes.... cry..... yes, yes, that's exactly what I want... the final ingredient to my fountian of life elixir!

The Miles Trahan Burger Experiment · « **Reply #58 on:** August 03, 2006, 12:10:46 AM »

YOU'RE NOT AS NICE AS YOUR CLEVER AVATAR SUGGESTS! :'(

Mr. Spinnington · « **Reply #59 on:** August 03, 2006, 12:14:15 AM »

Quote from: Master Shake on August 03, 2006, 12:10:46 AM

YOU'RE NOT AS NICE AS YOUR CLEVER AVATAR SUGGESTS! :'(

~~But you are as sad as yours led me to believe.~~ We're best friends.

News:

Author Topic: Man, I keep on striking out when it comes to these girls... (Read 13467 times)

rocketman