Author Topic: Eastern Promises or Viggo Fights w/ Full Front Nudity in Bath House Knife Fight  (Read 2744 times)

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The Fake Shemp

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It takes balls, literally, to launch a full-out knife fight in a bath house with your junk swinging all around.  Surely, the Chechen hitmen were in so in awe of Viggo's junk that they could not fight back.  The power of Viggo's junk compels you!
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demi

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ender's game the movie
fat

bud

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i've been wanting to see this movie for quite some time now. how big is he?
zzz

The Fake Shemp

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Kind of hard to see his junk with a knife fight going on - I would say average?
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TVC15

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How awesome will this be in HD, Willco?  ONLY ON HD-DVD!  Approximately how big will his Lil' Corny be on my 50" set?
serge

The Fake Shemp

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Maybe you will be able to see his junk clearer in HIGH DEFINITION!

Viggo Mortensen's junk: the look and feel of high definition!
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TVC15

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Maybe you will be able to see his junk clearer in HIGH DEFINITION!

Viggo Mortensen's junk: the look and feel of high definition!

And since it is the superior HD-DVD format, I can take SCREENSHOTS.  Fuck Blu-Ray!
serge

demi

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is The Full Monty in HD yet? hubba hubba
fat

The Fake Shemp

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Blu-Ray more like Blu-Gay, am I right?

spoiler (click to show/hide)
Serious note: Solid movie that honestly would've been amazing if it was another 60 to 90 minutes.  At a 90 minute running time, it just starts to feel like a Godfather-esque mafia epic with much more heart and morality, but it is kind of rushed to the end to complete the character arc for Naomi Watts' character (who kind of disappeared in the third act).  Had it continued to follow Viggo's character, the movie could've been epic and awesome, but it just kind of races to the end.  Outside of the awe-inspiring bath house knife fight with full out Viggo junk, it's a rather okay entry into the Cronenberg filmography and not memorable or experimental enough tot really own.
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Himu

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Viggo :drool
IYKYK

Eric P

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This scene was second last year to Marisa Tomei getting fucked doggystyle by Philip Seymour Hoffmann in Before the Devil Knows You're Dead for eyebrow raising moments.

5 or 6 people walked out of the theater when the movie opened like that.

then a lot of people who stayed until the end were just seemingly in shock.

absolutely relentless film
Tonya

Joe Molotov

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That scene made me gay for Viggo. :heartbeat
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TVC15

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This scene was second last year to Marisa Tomei getting fucked doggystyle by Philip Seymour Hoffmann in Before the Devil Knows You're Dead for eyebrow raising moments.

5 or 6 people walked out of the theater when the movie opened like that.

then a lot of people who stayed until the end were just seemingly in shock.

absolutely relentless film

I must see this movie
serge

The Fake Shemp

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Let's see it together, TVC.  Running commentary on Windows Live.
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Joe Molotov

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That was a pretty awesome way to open the movie, but if that had been Viggo's balls slapping her ass instead of PSH, it would have been Movie the Year.
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Eric P

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It is literally the very first thing in the movie you see, coming before any credits or (I can't be sure on this) splashscreen.  I saw it with my inlaws.

that had to be a great bonding experience
Tonya

TVC15

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How does the actual movie compare to his classics?  Good enough to stand up beside Serpico, Network, and Dog Day Afternoon?
serge

Eric P

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i've only seen it in the theater one time, i think it would take multiple viewings to get a better sense of it.

it was very gritty and "real" if a bit fantastic (as in fantasy) but the movie played by the rules that were set up, and the performances were great.

it's a simple story told really, really well.

if you like serpico and dog day afternoon, then there's no reason that you will watch this and shake your head.

it's more ronin than reindeer games if i were to compare it to frankenheimer's later works.
Tonya

Bloodwake

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The bigger question is, should I purchase this on HD DVD?
HLR

The Fake Shemp

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WAIT 4 BLU RAY
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Eric P

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no.

it's worth watching, but probably not worth owning
Tonya

lordmaji

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Damn... Wilco, you sure you're not in the closet? or are you switch hitting? I can't keep up w/ the forum queer confessions anymore. You guys seem to be popping out of closets left and right these days. :P

 :lol
:-[

Phoenix Dark

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how big was it? i want to rent the movie but need another excuse
010

lordmaji

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how big was it? i want to rent the movie but need another excuse

As big as me. If you remember. :lol  :o
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The Fake Shemp

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how big was it? i want to rent the movie but need another excuse

I dunno, it seemed a bit average.
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lordmaji

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how big was it? i want to rent the movie but need another excuse

I dunno, it seemed a bit average.

awww, you shot me in the heart. :(
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Phoenix Dark

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Oh well, I'll just borrow it from Gay Boy
010

WAIT 4 BLU RAY

It's coming out in the UK later this year on Blu-ray, and might be region free.
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DJ_Tet

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This scene was second last year to Marisa Tomei getting fucked doggystyle by Philip Seymour Hoffmann in Before the Devil Knows You're Dead for eyebrow raising moments.

I know what I'm downloading when I get home.
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Mupepe

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it's more ronin than reindeer games if i were to compare it to frankenheimer's later works.
Thank God for that.  Reindeer Games is one of the worst movies I've ever seen

Eric P

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this thread is so old i had to scroll to see what i was talking about

Tonya

Takuan

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Before the Devil Knows You're Dead is worth watching just to see Marisa Tomei's immaculate figure naked.

It defies the laws of nature.

She is a fucking goddess.