Author Topic: THE EGM HATE THREAD: Bring your justice, or stay the fuck out  (Read 10096 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Van Cruncheon

  • live mas or die trying
  • Banned
THE EGM HATE THREAD: Bring your justice, or stay the fuck out
« on: August 03, 2006, 06:05:12 PM »
So I *hear* that ONE of the crack-smoking, cat-piss-chugging, barrel-fucking reviewers over at EGM gave Ultimate Ghouls and Ghosts a *4.5* because it was TOO HARD.

This is fucking OBJECTIVELY WRONG. This is a TRAVESTY.

Now, the bashing begins.
duc

The Miles Trahan Burger Experiment

  • Can he only eat just one?
  • The Walking Dead
Re: THE EGM HATE THREAD: Bring your justice, or stay the fuck out
« Reply #1 on: August 03, 2006, 06:06:00 PM »
I remember when I used to read EGM. Lol.
BKO

Cheebs

  • How's my posting? Call 1-866-MAF-BANS to report flame bait.
  • Senior Member
Re: THE EGM HATE THREAD: Bring your justice, or stay the fuck out
« Reply #2 on: August 03, 2006, 06:07:56 PM »
I remember when video game magazines mattered. Lol.

MrAngryFace

  • I have the most sensible car on The Bore
  • Senior Member
Re: THE EGM HATE THREAD: Bring your justice, or stay the fuck out
« Reply #3 on: August 03, 2006, 06:08:05 PM »
You can catch EGM readings on #GA
o_0

The Miles Trahan Burger Experiment

  • Can he only eat just one?
  • The Walking Dead
Re: THE EGM HATE THREAD: Bring your justice, or stay the fuck out
« Reply #4 on: August 03, 2006, 06:08:47 PM »
You can catch EGM readings on #GA
:o Evilore's back at it?
BKO

Mondain

  • no bias
  • Senior Member
Re: THE EGM HATE THREAD: Bring your justice, or stay the fuck out
« Reply #5 on: August 03, 2006, 06:09:21 PM »
it was almost like a mini videogame encyclopedia at some point, but it's been junk for like two years

they try to be hip and appeal to teenagers instead of hardcore gamers

and their new reviewers don't know games and don't have a clue on anything

Van Cruncheon

  • live mas or die trying
  • Banned
Re: THE EGM HATE THREAD: Bring your justice, or stay the fuck out
« Reply #6 on: August 03, 2006, 06:10:17 PM »
This isn't about the relevance of EGM or videogame magazines. This is about some PIMPLY-ASSED PISSFLAP giving the GOTY 2006 a *4.5* because he is a GIANT SOBBY PORK RIND OF A HUMAN BEING.
duc

Cheebs

  • How's my posting? Call 1-866-MAF-BANS to report flame bait.
  • Senior Member
Re: THE EGM HATE THREAD: Bring your justice, or stay the fuck out
« Reply #7 on: August 03, 2006, 06:10:38 PM »
I will start caring about video game magazines again if we get a american style famitsu. Weekly and nearly everything being exclusive.

Till then MEH at the whole industry.

Edit: Also about the hard thing, I thought its difficulty was cut down?

The Miles Trahan Burger Experiment

  • Can he only eat just one?
  • The Walking Dead
Re: THE EGM HATE THREAD: Bring your justice, or stay the fuck out
« Reply #8 on: August 03, 2006, 06:11:25 PM »
BKO

Van Cruncheon

  • live mas or die trying
  • Banned
Re: THE EGM HATE THREAD: Bring your justice, or stay the fuck out
« Reply #9 on: August 03, 2006, 06:11:59 PM »
who is that bloatasaurus
duc

BlueTsunami

  • The Muffin Man
  • Senior Member
Re: THE EGM HATE THREAD: Bring your justice, or stay the fuck out
« Reply #10 on: August 03, 2006, 06:12:37 PM »
I also heard EGM cancelled August for Xbox360

LOL!
:9

Mondain

  • no bias
  • Senior Member
Re: THE EGM HATE THREAD: Bring your justice, or stay the fuck out
« Reply #11 on: August 03, 2006, 06:13:14 PM »
what's the name of the guy who awarded that ignoble rating?

MrAngryFace

  • I have the most sensible car on The Bore
  • Senior Member
Re: THE EGM HATE THREAD: Bring your justice, or stay the fuck out
« Reply #12 on: August 03, 2006, 06:13:23 PM »
o_0

The Miles Trahan Burger Experiment

  • Can he only eat just one?
  • The Walking Dead
Re: THE EGM HATE THREAD: Bring your justice, or stay the fuck out
« Reply #13 on: August 03, 2006, 06:13:34 PM »
who is that bloatasaurus
Olimarihoe gives you a:

BKO

Cheebs

  • How's my posting? Call 1-866-MAF-BANS to report flame bait.
  • Senior Member

The Miles Trahan Burger Experiment

  • Can he only eat just one?
  • The Walking Dead
Re: THE EGM HATE THREAD: Bring your justice, or stay the fuck out
« Reply #15 on: August 03, 2006, 06:14:45 PM »
His thumbs bother me.
It's because he spends all day sticking them up his ass and getting laughed at on OA...
BKO

brawndolicious

  • Nylonhilist
  • Senior Member
Re: THE EGM HATE THREAD: Bring your justice, or stay the fuck out
« Reply #16 on: August 03, 2006, 06:14:53 PM »
One guy brought an issue of a game magazine to school on the second day in this "bring something about you" presentation and he started to explain to the teacher how great cheats really were for the gamer and she said the game magazines were well written and that made him nod his head, I never wanted to smack somebody so bad.  A fucking game magazine.

MrAngryFace

  • I have the most sensible car on The Bore
  • Senior Member
Re: THE EGM HATE THREAD: Bring your justice, or stay the fuck out
« Reply #17 on: August 03, 2006, 06:16:13 PM »
SHUT UP THEY ARE JOURNALISTS BORN FROM THE HELLFIRES OF FANSITES
o_0

The Miles Trahan Burger Experiment

  • Can he only eat just one?
  • The Walking Dead
Re: THE EGM HATE THREAD: Bring your justice, or stay the fuck out
« Reply #18 on: August 03, 2006, 06:16:23 PM »
One guy brought an issue of a game magazine to school on the second day in this "bring something about you" presentation and he started to explain to the teacher how great cheats really were for the gamer and she said the game magazines were well written and that made him nod his head, I never wanted to smack somebody so bad.  A fucking game magazine.
:o

Third grader confirmed?!
BKO

brawndolicious

  • Nylonhilist
  • Senior Member
Re: THE EGM HATE THREAD: Bring your justice, or stay the fuck out
« Reply #19 on: August 03, 2006, 06:19:15 PM »
One guy brought an issue of a game magazine to school on the second day in this "bring something about you" presentation and he started to explain to the teacher how great cheats really were for the gamer and she said the game magazines were well written and that made him nod his head, I never wanted to smack somebody so bad.  A fucking game magazine.
:o

Third grader confirmed?!
This was 11th grade.  I didn't bring it though.

Vizzys

  • green hair connoisseur
  • Senior Member
Re: THE EGM HATE THREAD: Bring your justice, or stay the fuck out
« Reply #20 on: August 03, 2006, 06:19:16 PM »
I get a free subscription so I have no qualls.

However I do have a question to the topic maker. Are you Drinky Cum on OA? Or is that just a hilarious parody of yourself?

I'm thinking the latter but I would like your confirmation anyway.
萌え~

TakingBackSunday

  • Banana Grabber
  • Senior Member
Re: THE EGM HATE THREAD: Bring your justice, or stay the fuck out
« Reply #21 on: August 03, 2006, 06:19:27 PM »
They also gave the the 360's best game bound to be released until Gears of War pretty low scores.  Screw you EGM, Dead Rising and Ultimate G and G ROCK.
püp

Van Cruncheon

  • live mas or die trying
  • Banned
Re: THE EGM HATE THREAD: Bring your justice, or stay the fuck out
« Reply #22 on: August 03, 2006, 06:20:32 PM »
I am indeed "Drinky Cum" on OA.
duc

Vizzys

  • green hair connoisseur
  • Senior Member
萌え~

Van Cruncheon

  • live mas or die trying
  • Banned
Re: THE EGM HATE THREAD: Bring your justice, or stay the fuck out
« Reply #24 on: August 03, 2006, 06:23:21 PM »
i am sorely misunderstood.  :'(
duc

CajoleJuice

  • kill me
  • Icon
Re: THE EGM HATE THREAD: Bring your justice, or stay the fuck out
« Reply #25 on: August 03, 2006, 06:35:13 PM »
When editors/reviewers for gaming magazines are gaming pussies... it's a sad day. That's fucking garbage.
AMC

Mondain

  • no bias
  • Senior Member
Re: THE EGM HATE THREAD: Bring your justice, or stay the fuck out
« Reply #26 on: August 03, 2006, 06:45:13 PM »
Edge gave it a 9 instead, I'd trust them instead of those twats

BlueTsunami

  • The Muffin Man
  • Senior Member
Re: THE EGM HATE THREAD: Bring your justice, or stay the fuck out
« Reply #27 on: August 03, 2006, 06:56:20 PM »
Yeah, the disparity between Edge's score and EGM's score is very interesting. I say the main factor is that the writers for EGM are pussies
:9

captainbiotch

  • (jk i'm his wife, he's a dick)
  • Member
Re: THE EGM HATE THREAD: Bring your justice, or stay the fuck out
« Reply #28 on: August 03, 2006, 07:11:14 PM »
Has anyone played the game?  This thread reeks of hurt fanboy feelings.

CajoleJuice

  • kill me
  • Icon
Re: THE EGM HATE THREAD: Bring your justice, or stay the fuck out
« Reply #29 on: August 03, 2006, 07:18:26 PM »
Has anyone played the game?  This thread reeks of hurt fanboy feelings.
You didn't bring justice. STAY THE FUCK OUT
AMC

captainbiotch

  • (jk i'm his wife, he's a dick)
  • Member
Re: THE EGM HATE THREAD: Bring your justice, or stay the fuck out
« Reply #30 on: August 03, 2006, 07:23:47 PM »
Antifanboyism IS justice.


I really hope EGM is wrong too =(

etiolate

  • Senior Member
Re: THE EGM HATE THREAD: Bring your justice, or stay the fuck out
« Reply #31 on: August 03, 2006, 07:47:35 PM »
EGM reviews are just throwing darts at a board.

Phoenix Dark

  • I got no game it's just some bitches understand my story
  • Senior Member
Re: THE EGM HATE THREAD: Bring your justice, or stay the fuck out
« Reply #32 on: August 03, 2006, 08:04:25 PM »
EGM is one of the stupidest magazines in publication. Just a group of illerate distinguished mentally-challenged fellows who work for a Ziff Davis. Their reviews are terrible, their exclusives are weak, and their show sucks ass.

HAY LETS HIRE A ASIAN MAN FOR STREET CRED!


"Do I LOOK like I'm a virgin or what?"
010

Van Cruncheon

  • live mas or die trying
  • Banned
Re: THE EGM HATE THREAD: Bring your justice, or stay the fuck out
« Reply #33 on: August 03, 2006, 08:14:13 PM »
no che bashing, taco
duc

Phoenix Dark

  • I got no game it's just some bitches understand my story
  • Senior Member
Re: THE EGM HATE THREAD: Bring your justice, or stay the fuck out
« Reply #34 on: August 03, 2006, 08:15:33 PM »
no che bashing, taco

He's a douche. MS turncoat Nintendo hating little woman.
010

The Miles Trahan Burger Experiment

  • Can he only eat just one?
  • The Walking Dead
Re: THE EGM HATE THREAD: Bring your justice, or stay the fuck out
« Reply #35 on: August 03, 2006, 08:21:22 PM »
He's a douche. MS turncoat Nintendo hating little woman.
:o >:( ::)
BKO

Van Cruncheon

  • live mas or die trying
  • Banned
Re: THE EGM HATE THREAD: Bring your justice, or stay the fuck out
« Reply #36 on: August 03, 2006, 08:42:37 PM »
There's a lot of Nintendo-hating MS turncoats around these parts, pardner
duc

demi

  • cooler than willco
  • Administrator
Re: THE EGM HATE THREAD: Bring your justice, or stay the fuck out
« Reply #37 on: August 03, 2006, 09:33:34 PM »
i met che at E3 for a brief moment, he was cool, i got no queefs with him

beefs
fat

Phoenix Dark

  • I got no game it's just some bitches understand my story
  • Senior Member
Re: THE EGM HATE THREAD: Bring your justice, or stay the fuck out
« Reply #38 on: August 03, 2006, 09:38:30 PM »
i met che at E3 for a brief moment, he was cool, i got no queefs with him

beefs

You're lucky he didn't molest you. There are stories...
010

demi

  • cooler than willco
  • Administrator
Re: THE EGM HATE THREAD: Bring your justice, or stay the fuck out
« Reply #39 on: August 03, 2006, 09:44:48 PM »
i can hold my own against some microsoft loving asian
fat

Phoenix Dark

  • I got no game it's just some bitches understand my story
  • Senior Member
Re: THE EGM HATE THREAD: Bring your justice, or stay the fuck out
« Reply #40 on: August 03, 2006, 09:52:18 PM »
I doubt this. A Microsoft loving Asian is quite dangerous, mainly because there are so few of them that we can't pinpoint an exact weakness of them. It's not like, oh I don't know, the watermelon eating black man, whom we all know and love.







I'M NOT RACIST LOLZ I'M JUST A SELF HATING BLACK MAN
010

etiolate

  • Senior Member
Re: THE EGM HATE THREAD: Bring your justice, or stay the fuck out
« Reply #41 on: August 03, 2006, 09:56:11 PM »
I have no love for anything to do with EGM for the past.. god knows how many years. They went from suits who hate games to gamers who hate themselves for it. Just a circle jerk either way.

Mondain

  • no bias
  • Senior Member
Re: THE EGM HATE THREAD: Bring your justice, or stay the fuck out
« Reply #42 on: August 03, 2006, 09:59:34 PM »
Che always seemed cool to me, either way you better stop dissing him Phoenix else he'll steal your videogames while you're sleeping.

The Miles Trahan Burger Experiment

  • Can he only eat just one?
  • The Walking Dead
Re: THE EGM HATE THREAD: Bring your justice, or stay the fuck out
« Reply #43 on: August 03, 2006, 10:00:56 PM »
Che was my meal ticket for a job at 1Up.com (when I was still writing about games) before he jumped ship  :-\
BKO

Matlock

  • Junior Member
Re: THE EGM HATE THREAD: Bring your justice, or stay the fuck out
« Reply #44 on: August 03, 2006, 10:50:05 PM »
Although ToastyFrog is almost always wrong (see: Deep Labyrinth, which is about 2 points shy of a 6.5 on any sane scale), giving UGNG a score in the 5's is appropriate.  Unless there was a massive retool to the design and execution of the game, it has about as much relevance to the series as Metal Slug Advance does.

It's just too easy.

Bacon

  • MEMBER #37
  • Senior Member
Re: THE EGM HATE THREAD: Bring your justice, or stay the fuck out
« Reply #45 on: August 03, 2006, 10:52:47 PM »
I read EGM when I shit. The digital version.

Van Cruncheon

  • live mas or die trying
  • Banned
Re: THE EGM HATE THREAD: Bring your justice, or stay the fuck out
« Reply #46 on: August 03, 2006, 10:54:23 PM »
http://toastyfrog.com/verbalspew/archives/archive_2006-m08.php#e166

Parrish is a fuckin' distinguished mentally-challenged fellow. UGnG is unbridled brilliance, both in terms of visuals and controls. The ONLY complaint I'd level against it is the Strider 2-esque separation of levels into sublevels, separated by a brief load time, but hey: that's disc media for you. The rest is both a great homage to and a great reinvention of the series.

Look, I can understand some folks not liking the GnG controls and formula. I don't get the pleasure some folks find in the "tank controls" of RE, myself. Then again, I'd never review something I don't "get," either. Parrish is a dipshit, and the pre-emptive whining on his blog is just a series of blithering and unfounded angry adjectives. Hell, he doesn't even specifically mention what about UGnG sucks; he just throws several overarticulated and overmodified variations of "this game is crap" at us cruelly misled "hardcore". But aside from preference, there is absolutely NOTHING to hate about UGnG if you've enjoyed the series to date.

Normally, I'd ackowledge that I like some bogus and brutal games, but when drohne's opinion backs mine up -- a man whose taste has never steered me wrong when it comes to classic gaming genres -- I gotta say I *know* Parrish is just playing the role of snarky fucking iconoclast. Especially when he goes on to praise crap like Clash at Demonhead and Milon's Secret Castle in the rest of his blog. He's just trying to out-nerd the nerds, but he picked the wrong game to do it with.

Matlock, the difficulty has been cranked through the roof.
« Last Edit: August 03, 2006, 11:01:36 PM by Drinky Crow »
duc

Matlock

  • Junior Member
Re: THE EGM HATE THREAD: Bring your justice, or stay the fuck out
« Reply #47 on: August 03, 2006, 11:09:23 PM »

Matlock, the difficulty has been cranked through the roof.

I'll believe it when I see it.  The ability to continue from where you die and lifebars ruined the game when I had my hands on it.

Vagabond

  • Junior Member
Re: THE EGM HATE THREAD: Bring your justice, or stay the fuck out
« Reply #48 on: August 03, 2006, 11:12:42 PM »
Then you played on the Beginner difficulty, Matlock

Van Cruncheon

  • live mas or die trying
  • Banned
Re: THE EGM HATE THREAD: Bring your justice, or stay the fuck out
« Reply #49 on: August 03, 2006, 11:16:49 PM »
Yup. The Beginner setting *is* retardedly easy, and doesn't play at all like classic GnG. Move up to Normal to play the game in its challenging, classic style.
duc

Matlock

  • Junior Member
Re: THE EGM HATE THREAD: Bring your justice, or stay the fuck out
« Reply #50 on: August 03, 2006, 11:21:15 PM »
Then you played on the Beginner difficulty, Matlock

'twas the only mode available at the time, as "normal."

None of the other difficulties were open.