My dream began as a boy-wants-girl-boy-gets-girl-boy-loses-girl-boy-gets-girl-back romance involving a blonde Australian cutie, but it unexpectedly changed when I was kidnapped by a group of current Boston sports personalities, such as Kevin Garnett, Tom Brady, and Curt Shilling. They drove me, along with about a dozen others, to an abandoned house, where they forced us to construct a meth lab for them. After working all day and all night, I managed to escape from the house. I didn't, however, get far before Curt Shilling, wearing nothing except for his white baseball socks, ran out of the front door behind me carrying a chainsaw.
The chase lasted for some time until Shilling jumped a backyard fence and injured his right ankle on the landing. Curt, being the trooper that he is, was not deterred and he kept on chasing me. After running a few blocks, he started to limp noticeably. In desperation, he threw the chainsaw at me, just missing my head by inches. I picked the chainsaw up and approached Curt, who started crying and pointing to his now bloody right sock. I showed no mercy, and cut his head clean off his neck.
Some time later, the rest of the Boston sports heroes pulled up beside me. I thought they were finally going to kill me; instead, they thanked me.