I got it down to 1:31 this morning, offline, still didn't pop.

Cleared my cache and am trying again.
Interesting datapoint: XBLA previously downloaded only the base game, but now auto downloads the title update with the game.
Also, though I deleted this game from all storage devices, cleared my cache, and re-downloaded it, deleted the title update which forces me to play offline, it is unclear why the game still knows my previous best times. I'm missing data somewhere, and it is driving me bonkers.
Jesus.