From a quick search, I pulled the following T234 gems:
"The wife tried to punch me and got knocked slap the fuck out with a three-foot long dildo for her trouble."
"I swung a three-foot-long 17-pound dildo like a baseball bat at this bitch's face. Caught her right in the chin. She was OUT. "
"I care more about this laptop than your life, don't touch it."
"Not one day of my life goes by without being fucked up."
"I was even more weirded out by the fact that it wasn't covered in cum."
"I demand a beard-off"
"I MUST MEET THE MUSTACHIOED MAN. I ALSO MUST GET STONED WITH LENNEDSAY'S MOM."
And that's just getting started.