Thanks guys! She's doing so well and has blown her nurses away with some of the things she can already do. She's almost able to roll over already, which shouldn't happen for months. We're going to have our hands full
My in laws have done the following since Thursday:
- came up the first night after visiting hours were over and we had not gotten sleep in around 40 hours.
- they couldn't come up sooner because they "had company" - some friend who I've never heard them talk about but was more important than coming at an appropriate hour to meet their only grandchild
- They ran into my parents as they were leaving (since, you know, visiting hours were over), and my outspoken, amazing grandma asked why they were coming up so late. My MIL said, "Oh we know that grandparents have rights and can come to the hospital anytime they want, day or night." Not true at our hospital, and you have to sue for grandparental rights, which won't be awarded if the parents are still together or if the grandparents have no prior relationship with the baby. So no, this is a privilege, not a right.
- since it was after visiting hours, my nurse came in to check me, and needed to get some supplies, so I went to the bathroom while I was waiting. My mom called to let me know his parents were on their way up, so I told hubs that they needed to stay out until after the nurse got back and was done (5 min tops), because it's all pretty invasive. They came in anyway and put a bag of books on my bed while I was in the bathroom. So as I waddle back to the bed (one of the first times the nurses let me walk to the bathroom by myself), I have to pick up this heavy bag of books and move them. She wanted me to open them right then, and I can barely walk and can't sit down until the books move, and my nurse is standing there waiting on me. So I just pick up the bag, move it and say, "uh, thanks." and then the nurse makes them go behind a curtain and wait. But she wanted praise and wanted it then, so she's probably pissed about that. Sorry I need to sit down because I just birthed your grandchild in the middle of the night.
- the next day they came up to the hospital without calling, the only visitors that didn't call/text first, and I was trying to order and eat dinner so I could take my pain meds, which was pushed back
- I was getting ready to nurse the baby while I waited for my dinner to come, but couldn't because they came in. Kept saying I needed to feed her, and MIL even acknowledged they were going to get "kicked out" so I could nurse instead of actually stepping out voluntarily.
- My FIL made several crude remarks about me breastfeeding (hence why I don't feel comfortable breastfeeding in front of them)
- my MIL asked the weirdest question that probably had underlying meaning, "Now what foods can't you eat while breastfeeding?" So I told her, "The same healthy, balanced diet I was on while pregnant. Some older women always try to say there are foods you need to avoid, but that isn't exactly true anymore unless there's an allergy." aka tell the old bitch at your work to stop giving advice on shit she doesn't know about. Sometimes her generation are still in the "formula is a miracle created by scientists!!" mentality.
- my nurse actually had to make them leave the room so I could feed her because the nurses were concerned about her health, and his parents were huffy
- the entire time I fed Evey, the woman kept knocking on the door asking if I was done yet. The dads here might be able to attest to how long the breastfeeding process can take in the beginning. I can't do it under a cover yet because I have to see how she's latching, it could take a minute or an hour to get a newborn to latch properly, then it takes longer to feed in those first few days because your milk isn't in yet, and she's just getting little drops of colostrum (the super healthy stuff that comes out slow).
- when they came back in after we finished, they stayed another few minutes and said they were trying to leave but they couldn't get in to grab her purse because of the breastfeeding inconvenience (then knock on the door and ask your son to hand it to you? It's not that hard, and she wasn't shy about knocking.)
- room service delivered my dinner and she said it looked way better than the food they provided in her time. Just to get everyone up to speed, she never gave birth. My husband is adopted. She was never in the hospital eating bad food after birthing a child, so we're still not sure what she was talking about.
- she informed us they would see us this weekend at our home, and I flat out said we wouldn't be having visitors (see below for follow up)
- they didn't ask once to hold the baby that 2nd visit
- my bestie had shown up while they were out waiting, and MIL kept repeating that they were kicked out because I needed to breastfeed, not at all acknowledging that we were providing a huge benefit to her grandchild but that it was inconvenient. That's why you should've called first.
- she also told my bestie that my husband went "all crazy" and forgot to call them the day she was born, so they couldn't come up until late the night before. Except my husband did call them at 3:30 in the afternoon, 6 hours before they showed up, and they flat out told us and my parents they couldn't come up sooner because of their company. Plus how would they have known to come up if we hadn't called them? Chinese riddle for you
- since it was our fault they couldn't come up until late at night, it was also our fault that they hadn't eaten dinner before they came up and had to stop at Denny's on the way home and didn't get home until midnight. The night before we had to go to the hospital before we ate dinner, and didn't have a meal from 11:30am until 8am the next morning, and I pushed out a watermelon in that time, so I really didn't care.
- hubs called his parents the next day after we left the hospital to make sure they weren't going to just "stop by" our house. (Since I told her we wouldn't be having guests, not sure why this is necessary but it was.) MIL was going to come out anyway against our wishes but my FIL told her we needed rest and talked her out of it.
There's probably more but I forget now. She's a piece of work.
my poor husband is so used to it, but he's embarrassed and honestly wonders if she's getting Alzheimer's like her mom.
Meanwhile I have a snugly little girl curled up next to me.
