Yet another GAF thread - I still haven't got over it :( (No spergfits allowed)

[Shadow Mod]

I would say the smarter kids are the ones who figure it out and keep their mouths shut to get even more presents.

I'm not sure how one correlates with the other. I got just as many. Also got to start opening them early because the charade was over.

We always got our Santa gifts first because Santa never wrapped his gifts, he just left them in a pile on the floor. With gifts from our parents, we had to open them all one at time and then pose for a picture with the gift before we could move on to the next one.

Your fam is so corny. The only pics of me with presents was my first Christmas.

[Your Stalker]

i sneaked around and saw my gifts plus we aint have no damn chimney

[Yulwei]

http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showthread.php?t=737632

Sometimes it feels like GAF just wants to usher in a new age of reason so they can justify being boring and soulless.

Santa is a good litmus test for how dumb your kid is honestly. I'm pretty sure I figured it out because Santa and Mom had eerily similar handwriting. I don't know how kids manage to think he's real past 7.

My mom told me and my brothers Santa was just a legend the first time the topic came up. I'm never gonna know if I would have  been one of the dumb kids or not 

[Joe Molotov]

Subliminal advertising on The Bore??

[thisismyusername]

That's actually pretty awesome, Oscar. If I ever had kids, I'd probably pull that myself.

[Shadow Mod]

I'm putting "from Freddy" on one.

[StealthFan]

I like the whole Santa thing.

[Shadow Mod]

I like the whole Santa thing.

You're letting religion in breh.

[StealthFan]

I love when you eat off one comment on the coli. I decided to ignore the race threads and just do my thang, and I've been feasting all those daps

[Phoenix Dark]

I love when you eat off one comment on the coli. I decided to ignore the race threads and just do my thang, and I've been feasting all those daps

I got a 50+ dap post brewing out chea. Feast away my brother

[thisismyusername]

I'm putting "from Freddy" on one.

You'd probably just get side-eyes, sis.

[fizzel]

http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showthread.php?t=737632

Sometimes it feels like GAF just wants to usher in a new age of reason so they can justify being boring and soulless.

Santa is a good litmus test for how dumb your kid is honestly. I'm pretty sure I figured it out because Santa and Mom had eerily similar handwriting. I don't know how kids manage to think he's real past 7.

I...ah...uhm...   

[Shaka Khan]

http://m.neogaf.com/showthread.php?t=735537

Slowly realizing "spergy Ninthing" is becoming more and more redundant. 

[StealthFan]

http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showpost.php?p=94342126&postcount=8

PD

[Shadow Mod]

http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showthread.php?t=738262

 

[Tasty]

http://m.neogaf.com/showthread.php?t=735537

Slowly realizing "spergy Ninthing" is becoming more and more redundant. 

If he was an actual Ninthing he would have chosen something other than Wario Land 4. He's also writing essays on Uncharted 2, Wipeout, and some others.

I've always wanted to do something like that for a few platform games. We shouldn't be disparaging critical analysis of games when in the same breath we say "lol games journalism."

[Shadow Mod]

Critical analysis of Wipeout?

[nudemacusers]

not all criticism is created equal, there are interesting ideas and connections to be made, certainly.

then there are 600 pages of fanboy wank. it's probably terrible.

Critical analysis of Wipeout?

fast ship gud, slow ship bad

[brob]

Wipeout is fairly interesting. The work that Designers Republic did on it and how those aesthetic sensibilities were carried through the series or how Wipeout influenced the perception of the Playstation in the UK are subjects that could make for worthwhile writing.

Media and pop culture analysis often ends up being a bit over-ambitious and meandering (pretentious), but I appreciate the effort.

[benjipwns]

“A Critical Analysis of Wario Land 4 is unusual in its approach as we begin to understand videogames through evidence-based analysis rather than socio-cultural critique. I’m hoping this book will push against the accepted norms of ‘games criticism’ and open up new avenues for analytical discussion.”

[benjipwns]

We shouldn't be disparaging critical analysis of games when in the same breath we say "lol games journalism."

lol why

Games journalism is lol because many of the same people think they're doing both gumshoe journalism and high level critique when it's just outsourced PR and Churnalism with a smattering of consumer reporting and hobby horses, encouraging it to ape academic and/or fan wank even more in some grand pursuit of gaining validity as art through critique doesn't bring it any closer to journalism. All you're going to wind up with is even more bad writing that's only "read" by people who want it to confirm their biases.

Video games are exercises in cooperation between game designers and players, based on mutual trust and like expectations. Game designers offer an experience and players offer the agency to pilot that experience. The player trusts that the game designer will teach them the rules and mechanics of the game and provide a rigorous and enjoyable challenge. The game designer trusts that the player will cooperate with them in order to achieve these things. The player consents to the game designer’s manipulation and control in the belief that it is in their shared interest, even though this puts them in a position of subordination. Video games are an inherently coercive art form.

The game designer has two main methods of controlling the player: rewards and punishments.

Conclusion
Rewards and punishments are devices which the game designer can use to manipulate the player. Rewards control the player through guilt, completist tendencies, and positive reinforcement. Punishments control the player through hard and soft threats. These devices allow the game designer to facilitate education and mastery of the game’s mechanics.

Game Idea
The game idea for The Curious Factory is that of the factory itself, mechanisation and Taylorism. Mechanisation is the introduction of machines into human processes as apparent through the wheel platforms (jumping), conveyor belts (walking), crushers, and decompressors (transforming). These level elements automate the interactions or, at least, make them easier for the player.

Taylorism is the concept of dividing labour down into its smallest units for economic efficiency. This way, goods can be mass-produced as each worker only needs to repeat the one basic action multiple times. The Curious Factory emulates Taylorism by altering arrangements which would usually be beaten in one or two interactions so as to require a series of interactions. The wheel platforms divide one large jump into several shorter jumps, Flat Wario turns falling into a management of timed sways, and the conveyors—if the player allows them—remove walking altogether. Since Wario is the only worker in the factory, Taylorism ends up increasing the difficulty by giving the player more opportunities to stumble.

The Fold

The fold is a reroute, sending Wario down to the factory’s basement. Frog blocks play their usual role. The platform with the frog switch leads Wario off to the right so that the player doesn’t miss the jewel piece chest. The ladder creates negative space (where the player is only holding the up arm of the d-pad) which draws attention to the timer and fuels tension. The Kaentsubo can only worsen the situation.

Room 7
The platforms only slow Wario’s fall. The holes are wide enough for the Totsumen to easily descend the floors if it charges into the wall or is bumped downwards. Wario will invariably be flattened as the conveyor slows his escape. The conveyor belt and Flat Wario game ideas combine.

In the main area, the rotating platforms are arranged horizontally. Arranged vertically, the lower platforms catch Wario’s fall, minimising backtracking. Arranged horizontally, all falls lead to a restart. The punishment is greater. The conveyors, pushing to the right, speed up any backtracking. The ladders add tension through negative space. The two industrial platforms mix up the arrangement to keep the player on their toes.

The player can neglect the rotating platforms, however, the tall ladder and pull of the conveyor against Wario remove any time advantage. Taking the upper route not only requires less time, but rewards the player with crystals and a diamond. The benefits are twofold.

It's a poorly written strategy guide.

Wario is a product of the Super Mario phenomena. Influenced by R&D1′s subversive approach to design, Wario was created as an inverse of Mario’s character. Where Mario is an altruistic hero, Wario is a greedy villain. From the flipped “M” to mechanics and momentum, their opposing personalities are established both through context and through play. In order to understand what changes R&D1 made to Mario to create Wario, I’ve catalogued an extensive list of the differences below.

Contextual
Appearance

Mario’s clothes are primary-coloured. Wario’s are secondary. Mario’s moustache is curvy. Wario’s is a zigzag. Mario’s nose is a perfect, white oval. Wario’s is a bumpy, pink wart. Mario’s gloves are plain. Wario’s have a “W” print. Mario’s ears are curved. Wario’s are pointy. Wario has an alternate costume that he wears in the WarioWare series. Mario sticks to tried-and-true red and blue. Apart from their Italian heritage, portly physique, hat, and overalls, which group the pair in the same character mould, Mario and Wario are visual opposites.

Conclusion
Mario and Wario were cut from the same cloth. Where they diverge though, they are defined. Mario’s clothes are primary-coloured. Wario’s are secondary. Mario pursues altruism. Wario pursues greed. Mario’s mechanics encourage the player to engage with acceleration and momentum. Wario’s give them a variety of ways to defeat enemies and solve puzzles. Mario takes advantage of power-ups, while Wario is inflicted with transformations.

Using Mario as a template, Wario was created by inverting his appearance and backstory, adding attack mechanics, and removing the nuances of movement. This formed Wario as he was in Super Mario Land 3: Wario Land. In Wario Land 2 and 3, transformations fleshed out the self-deprecating aspect of his personality. Wario Land 4 added to the continual adjustments before the character was given a partial reboot in the WarioWare series.

wow thx

600 pages of this.

[Snake]

At least my 150-page marxist critique of Link's Crossbow Training doesn't seem so bad anymore.

[Shadow Mod]

 

[Broseidon]

 

this is amazing

[Phoenix Dark]

 

god dammit Awesom-O

[Broseidon]

[Phoenix Dark]

[StealthFan]

[Broseidon]

would waifu

[benjipwns]

i think it's possible to do an entertaining wordswordswords critique of vidya, i mean, that's basically the GIA and jeremy parish in a nutshell, but you have to be a pretty damned good writer, and it doesn't look like bucky there has the skill to match his enthusiasm.

Right, and he's going about it the wrong way. Instead of focusing on some singular concept or idea (or a few) or trying to identify those it looks like he's instead trying to catalog every single object, event, environment, circumstance, etc. of one single game. And then somehow establish this as "critical analysis" by describing them as they appear in the game. Which is something, but I'm not sure it's critique.

Even giving him the benefit of the doubt that there's more to it than the excerpts he's posted on his site, stuff like this gibberish isn't very encouraging about the parts where he is trying to say something:

Video games are exercises in cooperation between game designers and players, based on mutual trust and like expectations. Game designers offer an experience and players offer the agency to pilot that experience. The player trusts that the game designer will teach them the rules and mechanics of the game and provide a rigorous and enjoyable challenge. The game designer trusts that the player will cooperate with them in order to achieve these things. The player consents to the game designer’s manipulation and control in the belief that it is in their shared interest, even though this puts them in a position of subordination. Video games are an inherently coercive art form.

[Shadow Mod]

When I think "critical analysis" I think you assert a central theme (or themes) and how the medium manages to support this via artwork, shots, lighting, mood, scenes, texture, color, etc. That's what I'm used to. If it's just some technical reference book I don't give a shit.

[Van Cruncheon]

“A Critical Analysis of Wario Land 4 is unusual in its approach as we begin to understand videogames through evidence-based analysis rather than socio-cultural critique. I’m hoping this book will push against the accepted norms of ‘games criticism’ and open up new avenues for analytical discussion.”

ulillillia: a novel

[Van Cruncheon]

i think it's possible to do an entertaining wordswordswords critique of vidya, i mean, that's basically the GIA and jeremy parish in a nutshell, but you have to be a pretty damned good writer, and it doesn't look like bucky there has the skill to match his enthusiasm.

he's writing the book as a response to lol games journalisms discussing the offending feels. sounds like he's already pissed in his analysis punchbowl.

[benjipwns]

I missed that he posted the preface with his intent and goal:

This book is not, as the title suggests, an analysis of Wario Land 4. Rather, it is a critique of contemporary games writing, in particular the broadly-defined games criticism. I evaluate games criticism through the proposition of games analysis, a new type of games writing which seeks to improve the art and science of video games through clear language, authoritative evidence, and a focus on interactivity. A Critical Analysis of Wario Land 4 is an example of games analysis brought to its logical conclusion: a piece of writing which thoroughly explains the workings of an entire game. Everything from mechanics to engagement to level design is covered. Without trying to sound arrogant, I would contest that there has never been a deeper, more comprehensive piece of writing ever written about a video game.

This is not to condemn games criticism nor discourage those engaged in thoughtful games discussion (it is, after all, for you guys that I wrote this book), however, while there are some genuinely excellent pieces of writing out there, games criticism certainly has a few issues in its current form*. Thus, it is my intent to use games analysis as a means to improve the state of games criticism. I don’t see games analysis as a replacement for games criticism, but rather as an important subset of the broader discussion.

The most confounding and inexcusable aspect of games criticism, and games writing in general, is the lack of evidence to support a writer’s claims. Without evidence there is only opinion, and if there’s anything we’ve learnt from the internet, it’s that anyone can, and does, have an opinion. Evidence grants authority. It proves that the writer isn’t just spouting out ideas, but has a considered and balanced argument. In the very least, it shows the reader how the writer came to form their opinion. In fairness, many writers do provide some form of evidence in their writing, but it’s often vague, insufficient, or never properly scrutinised. Saying that game X is boring because levels Y and Z are poorly designed doesn’t tell the reader how levels Y and Z are poorly designed or how two poorly designed levels can make an entire game boring, never mind what “boring” means. The more extensive the evidence and thorough the explanation of the connection between the evidence and the argument, the more credible the article.

(This is why FAQ writers and Let’s Players have a leg up over game critics. FAQ writers because they’ve already written extensively about the game system, and therefore have it all mapped out in their head. Let’s Players because they have the evidence right in front of them, which makes it easy to shoot off a quick observation in context).

When evidence is utterly void, the only way to grab reader interest is to inflate opinion. Thus, we see posts with titles like “Is Zelda Skyward Sword the worst game in the series?”, backed up with a few paragraphs of fashionable ignorance. Forget about looking at the dungeons, inventory, story, or game structure.

In A Critical Analysis of Wario Land 4 all assertions are backed up with evidence and detailed explanations. My opinions are downplayed to the point that I don’t even reveal if I like Wario Land 4 or not. The goal is to interpret the game for what it is; not to talk about my feelings. I’ve chosen this super objective approach so that the book acts as a polarising alternative to the over-abundance of opinion out there. I want the nuances of the game design to set the agenda, because it’s these details that define the game.

Of all the games one could write a book about, don’t you find it a little odd that I chose Wario Land 4? I could have written about a Bioshock or an Uncharted. Instead, I chose a simple game with a child-friendly veneer released more than 11 years ago on a portable platform—talk about irrelevant! This decision was intentional. Along with making a case for games analysis, I also want to challenge three aspects of the game enthusiast community:

 The games press’s lack of enthusiasm for portable games and games for children.
The general stigma of playing and writing about old games.
The focus on games which emphasise ideas over interactivity (i.e. Bioshock and Journey) by writers of games criticism.

Thinking about that paragraph I reposted above, the idea of video games as "inherently coercive" is an interesting argument, he should have wrote about supporting that claim instead. (And stuff like say how invisible walls and "YOU'RE LEAVING THE BATTLEFIELD SOLDIER" and not being able to swim and so on are self-defense mechanisms against the players coercive violence towards the developers vision!)

[Joe Molotov]

My Critical Analysis: Wario Land 4 licks a taint, Wario Land 3 was da bes.

[Van Cruncheon]

sophomore year philosophy, assuming he passes* 101, is gonna blow his miiiiiiiind

*his 30-page essay regurgitating ayn rand's greatest hits will see him sent back to the stem dungeon

[benjipwns]

This is his "mentor": http://critical-gaming.com/gamedesign101/

In the real world, progress and time are the result of simple addition and substraction. Each moment of each day stacks on top of each other, and each accomplishment adds to the success in our lives. This is why combos and multipliers are abstract mechanics. To think, if college students could do well enough in a class to have their accumulated college credit multiplied so that good students can chain their education and graduate in less than half the time. Such a possibility is preposterous simply because combos don't exist naturally.

Points can represent abstract rewards or concrete progress. For a good concrete example, just look at sports like Soccer or Hockey. Each goal gives a point for a specific team, and the winner is determine by which team has the highest score. In this example, each goal is represented by 1 point thus avoid any kinds of abstractions between the game and the point system. However, moving a little closer to the abstraction side, sports like Football, Golf, and Basketball have point systems that aren't directly correlated with scoring. In football, running a touchdown earns the team 6 points with a chance to kick for and additional point. Each team can also earn 3 points by kicking a field goal if they haven't just scored a touch down. In Basketball, each point doesn't equate to a basket. And in Golf, a player can lose more than one stroke for landing a ball out of bounds. The point values for these games vary for balance. Though the assignment of points in this way works, it still can seem arbitrary. Fortunately, such sports are still simple in how the points add up.

Without organic forms and actions to limit an abstract mechanic, the gameplay in such games tends to boil down into simple experiences of trial-and-error or optimization instead of blossoming into emergence and expression. This is the ultimate danger of abstract mechanics.

http://critical-gaming.com/blog/2010/3/31/an-examination-of-skill-pt1.html

The big question I face (and I assume we all face) is "who am I?" There are many ways to answer this question, but personally I tend to set aside all opinions, adjectives, and quantifiable factors (height, weight, skin color, etc). Instead, I look solely at my abilities and potential to act. In other words I define myself by my skills and what I can to do with them. Perhaps growing up in the modern United States has greatly influenced my attitude. Mix equal parts American Dream with "all men are created equal" and you'll understand where I'm coming from. I don't judge others superficially. Yet, I evaluate each individual as best as I can. Since we all use our own understanding and experiences as a lens through which we view the world, understanding myself is the first and best step in understanding you.

So I begin An Examination of Skill, an article series in which I will use myself as the primary subject and detail my abilities so we all can established some common ground. The first thing to understand about me is my name. Not my real name, but my online handle: KrazyKirbyKid.

spoiler (click to show/hide)

"Every Game I've Ever Played. 950+ (working list)" https://docs.google.com/spreadsheet/ccc?key=0ArDfWXnferFpdElaanJQOGZFM3JUeUwyU1YtUnZtSkE

[close]

[Joe Molotov]

I thought you guys were joking when you said it was 600 pages, what is this I can't even? 

[Tasty]

OK he does seem like a bit of a crazy twat. But like Oscar said it can work.

[benjipwns]

I'd say to compare how he labors over every component of a level compared to the aforementioned Jeremy Parish who usually covers all the enemies/layout/etc. in just a paragraph or two but Parish also includes his opinion in his writing which violates the objective evidence analysis that is truly needed for games criticism and understanding Nintendo Magic.

[Shadow Mod]

If only gaming nerds would put as much effort into being decent people.

[benjipwns]

If only gaming nerds would put as much effort into being decent people.

Also, you have fucked up teeth.

[benjipwns]

http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showpost.php?p=94248634&postcount=316

What an asshole. I literally felt hot anger inside me when i read this. There are plenty of people that would buy this on Wii U, my boyfriend and I included. If you never release the game, how do you know?

http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showpost.php?p=94314088&postcount=658

I don't resent business decisions or design choices keeping games on specific platforms, and I'm not going to port beg.

But I do find it irritatingly childish to see developers, games journalists and commentariat revel in unbridled glee at the relative commercial failure of a platform they allegedly have no interest in.

But thats been par for the course the past seven years. You cant expect them to suddenly all grow up at once.

http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showpost.php?p=94386679&postcount=708

Videogame interviewers are so frustrating. Instead of asking about Demon's/Dark Souls on Wii U, why not ask them if they would ever consider making a Rune/Lost Kingdoms III game instead? Those were two fairly interesting Gamecube titles From developed "back in the day" that could work quite well on the Wii U (card deck on pad, etc.). What about grilling them on King's Field or one of their other untouched IPs they've been sitting on? In the minority here, but I miss the days when From was an underdog company and they released quirky titles left and right that no one played. I want some Eternal Ring/Evergrace/Lost Kingdoms-like alternatives for PS4/Vita/Wii U etc.

[DCharlieJP]

There are plenty of people that would buy this on Wii U, my boyfriend and I included.

If you are so excited for this sort of game you bought the wrong fucking platform.

[etiolate]

Lost Kingdoms was pretty tight.

[Olivia Wilde Homo]

Furthermore, we saw it many times: Nintards don't want to buy multiplatform titles on Nintendo consoles.  They demand either exclusive content or that the game be exclusive to Nintendo.  None of these losers would buy Dark Souls 2 on the Wii U.  It's the same bullshit we all saw with Nintards regarding the Wii.

[octopushover]

http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showpost.php?p=94248634&postcount=316

What an asshole. I literally felt hot anger inside me when i read this. There are plenty of people that would buy this on Wii U, my boyfriend and I included. If you never release the game, how do you know?

even the avatar has shitty graphics

[ToxicAdam]

What about grilling them on King's Field or one of their other untouched IPs they've been sitting on? In the minority here, but I miss the days when From was an underdog company and they released quirky titles left and right that no one played.

Yes,  grill that company on why they aren't remaking games that no one bought the first time! What is wrong with them?

[DCharlieJP]

but I miss the days when From was an underdog company and they released quirky titles left and right that no one played

Oh i see his logic now - get From back on the WiiU so he can once again revel in their quirky titles that no one will play!

On a side note - The Bayonetta 2 sales figures are going to be an hilarious slap in the chops for NinKendolls

[Cascade]

but I miss the days when From was an underdog company and they released quirky titles left and right that no one played

Oh i see his logic now - get From back on the WiiU so he can once again revel in their quirky titles that no one will play!

On a side note - The Bayonetta 2 sales figures are going to be an hilarious slap in the chops for NinKendolls

I really can't see Bayonetta 2 even doing 50K LTD. On that note, does anyone know the LTD sales of the Wonderful 101?

[Yulwei]

http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showpost.php?p=94454332&postcount=117

 

[Joe Molotov]

Truefacts.

[thisismyusername]

Furthermore, we saw it many times: Nintards don't want to buy multiplatform titles on Nintendo consoles.  They demand either exclusive content or that the game be exclusive to Nintendo.  None of these losers would buy Dark Souls 2 on the Wii U.  It's the same bullshit we all saw with Nintards regarding the Wii.

Ding-ding-ding. We have a winner.

And this is why Nintendo needs to die faster and harder/become third party so these idiots will see the error of their ways.

[Shadow Mod]

gaf: humoring idiots and spergs for ad revenue

[Shadow Mod]

http://neogaf.com/forum/showthread.php?t=738766

DAT GRAVEYARD

Just saw this and I'm dying.

[Rufus]

Like cannon fodder.

[Shadow Mod]

http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showpost.php?p=94483834&postcount=144

Tried to save himself. Banned.

 

[pilonv1]

But I do find it irritatingly childish to see developers, games journalists and commentariat revel in unbridled glee at the relative commercial failure of a platform they allegedly have no interest in.

gaf wouldn't exist without this

[Yulwei]

http://neogaf.com/forum/showthread.php?t=738766

DAT GRAVEYARD

Awesome. That thread is a perfect example why fanboys are so fucking obnoxious and ruin everything they touch. Guy types up a bunch of reasons why he thought that game sucked, and instead of trying to have a discussion, fanboys start posting one word replies and smarmy sentences.

[nudemacusers]

http://neogaf.com/forum/showthread.php?t=738766

DAT GRAVEYARD

Awesome. That thread is a perfect example why fanboys are so fucking obnoxious. Guy types up a bunch of reasons why he thought that game sucked, and instead of trying to have a discussion, fanboys start posting one word replies and smarmy sentences.

maybe I'll make a 'why uncharted 3 is the worst non-vita uncharted' and see how many sonybanderasjoeyoshida.gifs I can spawn.